| The Yellow Tuna Fish -- Part 2 written by Tony Kirsch, bestselling author of The Adventures of Team 1 and edited by me |
| Back at the secret location of Titanium Tiffany and Satan, the team was arguing amongst themselves. "Way to go, Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto. You let No Grammar Boy -- er, Slick Idiot get away," said Titanium Tiffany. "Stop, this will solve nothing," Satan butted in, "Check the almighty Book of Knowledge and see if there is a way that we can digi-volve to a higher level. If not, we need to figure out a plan." "Excellent idea, Satan. Let's see, Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto, do you have the Book of Knowledge?" asked Titanium Tiffany. "Indeed I do. Let's ask the book together. Ready?" "BOOK OF KNOWLEDGE, ENLIGHTEN US!" "Aw, Team 1. Well, what can I do for you today?" asked the book. "We need to figure out a way to digi-volve to beat Slick Idiot. Can you help us, Book?" asked Titanium Tiffany. "I suggest you ask the prophet," said the book. "Who is this prophet and where do we meet him?" asked Satan. "I was getting to that before I was so rudely interrupted. His name is George Carlin. He will guide you on the right path. But first, you must find him," answered the book. "Thank you, Book of Knowledge. Come on, gang. We have a Mr. Carlin to find," said Titanium Tiffany. So Team 1 went off into the night in search of George Carlin. They knew he was somewhere in Seattle. How? Well, I don't know. Look, get off the subject, will you? Tell you what, the book told them. There. Happy? Jeez, you pricks, use your imagination for once. Anyway, so they headed for Seattle. Meanwhile, Slick Idiot was thinking about his next offensive attack. "Mr. Sorkin, do you have those brand new transcripts of Sports Night ready?" he asked. "All ready to go, but remember, you get the world, I get Peter Krause," hissed Aaron Sorkin. "Well, let's get to work." Look, Tony. You know I'm the damn narrator and I'm sick of jumping city to city. Do you think that maybe you should, I don't know, get to the climax soon? Just saying. Anyway, back in Seattle, Team 1 was looking for George Carlin. But they found a person who may be of some assistance: Dave Attell. "So you guys are looking for George Carlin then? He's right over there in the Swanston playhouse," said Dave Attell. "Thank you, Dave Attell, Insomniac on Comedy Central, Wednesdays at 9:30pm Central Time," said Team 1 pluggingly [definition of pluggingly: to plug one's TV show]. So Team 1 ran into Swanston playhouse and grabbed George Carlin. "Listen, Mr. Carlin, we need you to tell us how to digi-volve to the next level," cried Team 1. "Right. Well, what you do is... (whisper whisper whisper). Alright?" asked George Carlin. "Thank you, George Carlin. Ready Team... Let's do it," said Titanium Tiffany. Titanium Tiffany digi-volve to... Super TCBY! Satan digi-volve to... Super President Rose! "Wow! We are Super digi-volved," said Super TCBY, "Now let's kick some major ass." So the Super Team 1 flew to the place where Slick Idiot was. They knew the best way to catch him would be to watch Sports Night. Sure enough, the same form of 'there' was being used. Now was the time to act. "Super TCBY and Super President Rose," said Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto, "I am going to go up in that tree to see if I can get a better look. I will be right back." Sure enough, Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto came back down, with a momentum of 753 meter/second. So once again, Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto had decided to be the lookout. "Well, now is our chance. Let's go, Super President Rose," said Super TCBY. WHOOSH! "What are you two doing here?" asked Slick Idiot, "and why do you look so Super?" "We are here to bring you back to Nebraska," said Super President Rose. "Never!" cried Slick Idiot. So Super Team 1 clashed with Slick Idiot. They had to remember there old fight with him. "Super TCBY, I am going to take care of him. SPECTACLES FIRE!" cried Super President Rose, "Now finish him." "SPEECHY TONGUE BULLSHIT!" cried Super TCBY. With the spectacles firing and Super TCBY's speechy tongue, Slick Idiot's power was diminishing. Then he was defeated. Super TCBY flew Slick Idiot back to Nebraska, where he proceeded to take finals from the evil Dr. Kahlee. As for Aaron Sorkin, once Slick Idiot was gone, his terribly horrible grammar went away with him, and the show Sports Night went on to win some award. Well, it looks like the onion that is Team 1 is unravelling and is making people cry. Let Me Sleep, You Sow! The exciting 5th story in the Team 1 series now available on webperson's website. Coming soon to home video and DVD! Home |