Finding yourself All your life you've reached out only to find nothing of substance in your grasp while unclasping hopeful hands Grew up too fast a childhood lost an innocence unknown no truth, no trust no stability no loving light to guide your way. The things you lacked were things you never knew you needed You've searched and come up empty time and time again filling the spaces with whatever was there But nothing could fill that hole inside you that empty, aching void that silently, helplessly cried out for something to avoid the nothing that loomed inside. You're older now, sometimes wiser you know more truths, you know more lies, but most of all, you know more questions, and fewer answers. You walk with others, yet you are alone invisible by design no love, no hate the dullness comforts and torments you at the same time. But deep inside you some part of you they never got to, still struggles to be and reminds you that maybe, just maybe there is hope here. Hope to feel that life is more than breathing that love is more than passion mixed with pain, that you are more than a hollow heart and an aching void. No heart is hollow that cares like yours, no life is empty that touches others, no void is unfillable when it can be touched by someone who cares. There is life in you, my cynical friend you hide from it, yet you long for it and I will stand by you while you unlock it and throw away the key. Laurie 3/27/97