Chapter 22
The lads were all seated and Toni sat behind the mixers and equipment, facing them. The guys were given their microphones and headsets as Toni ended the commercial break. “Hello everyone! I’m back, and I apologize for that terribly long commercial break. Something came up, or should I say, some people came up!” she said, playing “Swear It Again” as background music. “Aah! I can practically hear all those girls screaming in their seats! Anyway, enough about that, I’m here today, live, with Westlife!” “Hey! It’s great to be here! Hello!” was everyone’s reactions, or at least somewhere along those lines. Mark kept quiet. “Oh come on! Say something Mark!” Bryan said. “Yeah, hello!” Mark said cheerfully, but he was looking angrily at Bryan. Bryan just laughed. “Okay, we asked the listeners earlier to call in and send their…” Toni began but Shane cut her off. “Excuse me, Toni. I just happened to notice, but you’re talking differently today.” “What? What do you mean? Is there something wrong with the way I talk?” she asked, suddenly conscious that she might have sounded weird. “Yeah! Shane is right! You don’t talk that way at all.” Nicky piped in. Toni rolled her eyes. “Guys! Of course I have to talk in a nicer way… we’re on air!” she said, smiling. “And doesn’t she look so different today? Did you get a haircut or something?” Kian asked. “What? Guys, come on! I’m the one who’s supposed to be interviewing you, not vice versa!” Toni said as she laughed. “You know, Toni looks so gorgeous today. Mark, doesn’t Toni look so beautiful today?” Bryan asked, looking mischievously at Mark. Mark sighed. “I don’t know Bryan. What do you think Helen would say when she hears you gushing over Toni?” he said, a hint of sarcasm filling his voice. “Well, I’m sure she won’t mind, ‘coz she knows she’s the most beautiful woman in the whole world for me! That’s why I’m asking you!” Bryan teased, laughing as he nearly fell off his seat. “You may be forgetting something Bry! You know, someone named Alessia?” Mark said, totally annoyed. The other four were so noisy and they kept laughing, talking all at once, as well as embarrassing both Mark and Toni as much as they could.
“Lads! Okay, back to what I was saying earlier, please! We asked the listeners to send us some of their questions for you via the pager, email or the phone. First question is from Tammy. She sent it through email and she’s from England. She wants to know, what will you guys be doing in the next few months?” Toni continued after the bantering had died down a little. “Yeah, umm… we’ll be going on a concert tour and as you know, it’ll be around Europe. I’m not certain what the dates are exactly but I know the tour will start a few days from now. It’ll end after… well, I don’t know when but the last spot would definitely be Ireland.” Kian answered. “Any support groups that we should watch out for?” Toni asked. “Well, as you know, Destiny will be with us, and I don’t know the rest.” Mark said. Toni acted as if she didn’t care. It was the band that Alessia was in.
There were loads more of questions, and Toni was beginning to feel relaxed. The only tense moments were when she had to ask Mark questions from the fans. They were having a bit of a laugh over the last question when Toni looked at the next question she was going to read to them. “Oh sh…” she almost cursed, covering her mouth just in time. She went pale. “What is it?” Bryan asked, standing up and going over to her. Bryan read the question and he laughed a bit. “Well now, should I read this one out loud or shouldn’t I?” Bryan asked. Bryan grabbed the pager away from Toni and she was desperately trying to get it back but he was much too tall. Toni went over to the computer. “Okay, next question…” “Uh-uh!” Bryan said as he covered her mouth with his hand. “This is the next question… man! This’ll be interesting!” he said. Toni tried hard to remove Bryan’s hand from her mouth but she couldn’t. The others just kept laughing. “Okay, this is the question. It’s from a girl named Christine, and the question is for Mark. There were rumors that you’ve had a girlfriend ever since the band started, but you broke up with her about a year ago. Who was the girl you were going out with before you went out with Alessia?” Bryan said as he let go of Toni. She looked like she was going to pass out. She sat on the chair, and she just looked to the floor. The laughter died immediately as soon as the question was asked. There was a long silence in the booth. “Well? Who was it?” Bryan asked, grinning mischievously. There was another long silence. “Look, let’s just move on to the next question.” Toni said, regaining her composure. “No.” Mark said. Toni looked stunned. “I’ll just answer it because sooner or later I’ll get plagued with questions concerning this so I’ll just get it over with right now.” Mark continued, sighing heavily. Bryan couldn’t say anything. He was dumbfounded. He only did it as a very cruel joke, but never in his wildest had he imagined that Mark would answer the question. Mark began, “Well, she was a foreign exchange student at school. Someone was terribly mean to her, and anyway, on her first day in school she literally came crashing into my life and she was crying. The next day I returned some of the things she had dropped when she bumped into me. Eventually, we became best friends then we had a fight. I went home, terribly angry over nothing, and I realized I was in love with her. I apologized and told her how I felt and things went on from there. We broke up because of… loads of complications.” he said, looking at Nicky and at Toni as he said the last sentence. “I know everyone’s wondering who she is, and well, it’s getting very uncomfortable for us in here, but I’d have to say who she is. Sooner or later everyone will find out anyway and I hope it’s okay with her.” he continued, looking at Toni. She nodded, as a gesture of giving her approval. Mark inhaled deeply before he spoke. “Well, it’s none other than Toni here.” he said weakly. He felt as if all the energy from his body left him as he said the words. “Umm… is there anything you’d like to add to that Mark or can we go on with the other questions?” Toni asked, her voice shaking. She didn’t even dare to look at Mark so she pretended to be reading the other questions. “None, none at all.” Mark said, refusing to look at her.
The interview went on for a few minutes, and it was a rather serious one after what happened. Even if some of the questions were silly, they all answered it formally and quite seriously. “Well, that was it!” Toni said, looking relieved that the interview was all over. “We want to thank you all for dropping by.” Toni continued. “Oh! You’re welcome.” were their replies. “Umm… before you go, we have a tiny favor to ask of you guys.” “Sure, what is it?” Nicky asked. “Well, we made a survey, and we asked what songs do the listeners like that are off the album, but you guys haven’t released yet. Anyway, the top three songs were ‘Moments’, ‘We Are One’, and there was a tie between ‘I Don’t Wanna Fight’ and ‘You Can’t Lose What You Never Had’. So that’s four songs all in all. Can you sing a song or two perhaps before you leave?” “Sure!” Shane said. “Can I pick the song we’re going to perform?” Mark asked the others. “Yeah, go on.” Bryan said. The others nodded in agreement. Mark moved his chair closer to the microphone.
“I can’t sleep, everything I ever knew, is a lie without you.” he began singing. Toni looked out of the booth. Anne was there, and Toni knew she was listening. “I can’t breathe, ‘coz YOU broke my heart in two. There’s no beat, without you.” Toni looked at Mark, surprised. He was looking at her. “Maybe he got the lyrics wrong.” she thought. “Why did he have to emphasize the word ‘you’ anyway? And why is he looking at me?” Toni thought as her eyes wandered around the booth. She had to look at something, anything but Mark.
“If we could try to end these wars, I know that we can make it right, ‘coz baby…” he sang, and he was still looking at Toni. She tried to look away but she couldn’t. Everyone was so surprised that Mark and Toni were actually looking at each other. More so when Mark even sang Shane’s lines. Shane didn’t mind anyway. He was far too happy because things between Toni and Mark looked like they were going to get better. “I know that we cam make it right, it’s gonna take a little time. Let’s not leave ourselves with no way out, let’s not cross that line.” Mark continued, his eyes still fixed on Toni. She looked away, fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall down her cheeks. She was quite happy, because it looked like Mark wanted to forget the past and be friends with her again. The thing was, she felt so sad knowing that they’ll never be more than friends again. And the song was just so… sad. It was so depressing to listen to. Bittersweet would be the right term for it. She looked back at Mark and she smiled a small, uncertain smile. “Remember that I made a vow, that I would never let you go. I meant it then, I mean it now, and I want to tell you so…I don’t wanna fight no more, I forgot what we were fighting for, and this loneliness that’s in my heart, won’t let me be apart from you. I don’t wanna have to try, girl, to live without you in my life. So, I’m hoping we can start tonight, ‘coz I don’t want to fight no more.” Toni looked away, turning around. She didn’t want Mark to see that she was crying. She was a bit confused. Surely it wasn’t so. He is going out with Alessia for crying out loud! The lads decided to do one more song, because they knew she was crying. They sang “Moments” and it was totally beautiful. But the lines “remember that I made a vow that I would never let you go. I meant it then, I mean it now…” just kept playing over and over in Toni’s mind. She had been looking Mark straight in the eyes while he was singing that part. Did she see something in his eyes? She was quite sure she saw the kind of sparkle that his eyes had in them when they were still so much in love. She could’ve sworn he looked at her the way that he used to look at her back then, full of love and tenderness. “Stop it Toni! Just stop pushing those foolish ideas into that narrow mind of yours.” she told herself as she turned to face the lads again, looking like as if nothing happened to her.