The Crass Menagerie

#100 - The Final Issue (Part Two)

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Sound Pound - Reviews of the Entire Slap A Ham Catalog (Continued)

Slap A Ham Records #20

IABHORHER

7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #1 of The Crass Menagerie - a paper edition)

IABHORHER are a feverishly intense group out of New York who have a new 7" out on the Slap A Ham label. Although a bit less frantic than most of the recent SAH releases, this band packs no less of a punch. Their label calls them "gloom-core," I would call it "snail-grind," but whatever you call it–get it. The only drawback to the whole release is the cover which was drawn by horror novelist Clive Barker, whose art sucks.

Slap A Ham Records #21

MDC / CAPITALIST CASUALTIES

Liberty Gone

Split 7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #8 of The Crass Menagerie - a paper issue)

This record combines legends with someday legends for a numbing trip through punk heaven. MDC struggled with their walkers into the studio to lay down two feverish shots of their patented sarcasm drenched punk. Both cuts "Nazi’s Shouldn’t Drive" and "Bombs Not Foods" have the potential of becoming standards for the band. Bravo guys (and gal). CAPITALIST do themselves proud in matching the fervor and passion of their counterparts by delivering a handful of the ripping, hypercore tunes that they are famous for. No punk generation gap here.

Slap A Ham Records #22

MAN IS THE BASTARD

DIY

CD

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in issue #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

This CD is required listening for anyone and everyone who claims to be a fan of extreme hardcore or power violence. Besides being the band that coined the genre tag "power violence" in the first place, they remain one of the most innovative and unique hardcore bands ever. In many ways MITB are to extreme hardcore what FLIPPER were to punk, an antithesis who provides a better definition of the topic than the thesis. In other words, MITB were very un-hardcore in a lot of ways but somehow ended up being MORE hardcore than just about everyone else. This semi-discography CD collects most of the bands early 7" tuneage. You get everything from the bands raw and raging CHARRED REMAINS material to early tastes of their noise de-evolution. It remains one of the most complete MITB experiences available.

Slap A Ham Records #23

SPAZZ / C.F.D.L.

Split 7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #8 of The Crass Menagerie - a paper issue)

Japan’s C.F.D.L. split with SPAZZ is a new Slap A Ham release that is mandatory. The SPAZZ side contains some of their best tunes to date, while C.F.D.L. comes across like an oldschool hardcore band on steroids. Their sound is definitely influenced by the ultra-brutal wave of Japanese hardcore, but C.F.D.L. pay more attention of their roots and tip their hat to some of the European hardcore masters. Get this 7" before it gets you.

Slap A Ham Records #24

13/EYEHATEGOD

Split 7"

(This review originally appeared in The Crass Menagerie #24)

These bands have two splits together, this one and the one on Ax/ction Records. Both are mandatory listening as far as I'm concerned. 13 are the goddesses of sludge and one of the heaviest bands ever. Punks playing metal, so you know it is extreme. EHG are legendary. They are the standard by which all distortion drenched, sludge bands are compared. They pioneered and perfected the sound. While other sludge acts were still trying to imitate FLIPPER, EHG were descending into the depths of pain and noise. Bravo.

Slap A Ham Records #25

PLUTOCRACY

Dankstahz

LP

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

This record has a great story... Basically it was recorded and pressed for a label other than Slap A Ham years before it was released. That label never paid their bill and so the records sat at the pressing plant for years. The plant finally told Max about them and asked if he wanted them. He did. He and Chris teamed up to pay for them then Max and Dan Lactose hand screened the 500 covers. The result was this incredibly limited release. Although you can now get these songs on the PLUTO discography and on a 10" from Europe, this pressing remains the one to have. Musically this is my favorite PLUTO by far. The band were totally raging. They had enough ENT influences still intact that they were definitely quasi-grindcore but they also were starting to let their own wacky take on music start to shine through. It’s a shame this wasn’t released when it was first recorded or it really could have been influential.

Slap A Ham Records #26

SUPPRESSION / DESPISE YOU

Split 7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

One of the less talked about Slap A Ham releases but one of my favorites. DESPISE YOU have a raw and unbridled sound that I really go for. The emotion takes a front seat and the technical elements of the music take a back seat. DESPISE YOU seem to always deliver a passionate performance. I may not always agree with what they are passionate about but their emotion comes through in the music and I dig it. For my money, they have the true "oldschool" formula because their ethos is reminiscent of bands like THE NECROS or NEGATIVE APPROACH. On the SUPPRESSION side of this record we get one of their strongest performances as well. They spurt through their 10 or 11 bursts of noisecore like their lives depended on it and your death depended on it. There are hints of the total meca-noise sound they would later master but here they sound more like kin of CROM.

Slap A Ham Records #27

DISCORDANCE AXIS / PLUTOCRACY

Split 7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

This split was another classic in a tightly packed herd of split 7"ers from SAH. DISCORDANCE AXIS were one of the most underappreciated grind bands ever. Their frenzied bashing was second to none. Their five songs on this split were five of the most pummeling tunes ever released on a SAH record. If that doesn’t put their delivery into perspective for you, nothing will. You are excused. Go home now. The PLUTO side was the last thing the band recorded before breaking up the first time and seeding bands like NO LESS and SPAZZ. A couple of the tunes on here were the most ferocious things PLUTO ever did. They weren’t so much grindcore anymore as pure, uncompromising thrash/power violence. They had kicked everything up a notch. Unfortunately there are a couple minutes of stinkers on here as well, where the band turns themselves into a soundtrack for samples. I hate that.

Slap A Ham Records #28

ENEMY SOIL

War Parade

7" (Caramel vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

At the time this was released, it was obvious "War Parade" was a blistering burst of thrash/grind. Unfortunately, however, this record paled in comparison to ENEMY SOIL’s absolutely amazing 7" on Relapse and sort of took a backseat to that masterpiece in many people’s minds, mine included. When I pulled this 7" out to prepare this review (I’ve lost the original one I did), I was more than pleasantly surprised. It has aged very, very well. It still lacks the raw intensity and over the top insanity of the Relapse record, but that doesn’t mean it won’t paralyze your cerebral cortex all by itself. As grind/pv/thrash/whatever has changed over the years it allows a record with the straight-forward pummeling of this one to really shine. It has the vibe that turned me onto this kind of music in the first place. I have no idea how easy this one is to find on eBay, or if these tracks are available on another release, but if you don’t have it, the hunt will be worth the effort.

Slap A Ham Records #29

PHOBIA

Enslaved

7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #45 of The Crass Menagerie)

This five cut baby is the first studio release from PHOBIA in what seems like forever. It has been a long wait! PHOBIA are one of the premier grind bands on this pollution stained rock we call Earth. Their very limited studio output has garnered them international recognition and their live show (I've seen them twice) is something that you have to see to believe. Shane is an maniacal frontman. He never stops moving. I saw him fall offstage and land in a pile of broken glass at the Fiesta Grande #3 and it didn't deter him for a second. He just kept on going. The fact that he has twisted a bunch of Christmas lights in his hair (by accident earlier in the show) only added to the visual magnificence of his insanity. Musically, the band haven't toned down one bit. In fact this is possibly their most fearsome recording to date. All I can hope is that it is a teaser for things to come and not their only release for another few years!!

Slap A Ham Records #30

NOOTHGRUSH

Embraced by the Anti-Self

7"

(This review originally appeared in issue #55 of The Crass Menagerie)

"Power-doom-sludge-core-tar-violence" as a catch phrase or a sub-genre tag is so lengthy it will never make it, but it is by far the most accurate string of words I could come up with to describe the massive barrage that is NOOTHGRUSH's sound! NOOTHGRUSH concoct one of the most devastating sounds on the planet. Their plodding metallic crunch registers on seismic devices worldwide. Live they are almost surreal in their aural overload and probably for the first time a recording has captured that devastation. Their other releases are great but this is heavenly (or hellish, pick your bent). All their rawness and heavy-handed crunch is masterfully preserved. Lyrically the band take one song "Dianoga" from the "Kashyyyk" demo and stay true to their Star Wars fetish and on the other song they tackle a more weighty issue... the nuclear devastation rent on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.... In addition to the wrenching lyrics of "Stasis" all the cover art was created by survivors of the nuclear attacks that climaxed a war that claimed around 38 million lives. This record is a glorious achievement from a stellar band. But lest I've led you to believe they are all gloom and doom, check out the Mr. Rogers sample leading into "Dianoga"... Funniest sample since THE ACCUSED stole "M is for Martha" from Sesame Street. If I were female, this record could have my baby!

Slap A Ham Records #31

SPAZZ / JIMMY WALKER

Split 7" (Clear vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

This was the first release in a trilogy of records that illustrated Chris Dodge’s quirky sense of humor as much as anything Slap A Ham ever did. Many people don’t know this, but Chris is a collector of "celebrity" records. Making celebrity records was a popular trend, especially in the 70s, where cheesy TV/movie personalities demonstrated their one-dimensional talents by trying to release a record, often with unintentionally hysterical results. Chris took some favorites from his collection and... um... borrowed them to create splits with three SAH bands. Fittingly the first release was a split with SPAZZ and Jimmy "Dyn-o-mite" Walker, better known as J.J. from the television show "Good Times." In J.W.’s defense it is obvious on his demented version of "Abbadabba Honeymoon" that there is nothing of substance to what he is doing. The jokes on him and he knows it. Very J.J., I must say. The SPAZZ side is, obviously, why anyone bought this record. It featured 7 SPAZZ classics recorded live on the radio in 1996 and one radio promo spot for SPAZZ. These were probably throw away tracks for the most part but some of them sound better here than their original recordings. No SPAZZ collector dares call his collection complete without this record. It is as funny as anything they ever did.

Slap A Ham Records #32

BENUMB / DUKES OF HAZZARD

Split 7" (Red vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appears right here in #100 of The Crass Menagerie)

One of the members of BENUMB stood in line by me at the final SPAZZ show, but he was smart. Whereas I stood there for six hours he just butted in for the final hour or so. I admire him for his brains. Seriously. I would give credit where credit is due and tell you which member it was but I can’t remember. Sorry. Anyway BENUMB are an incredible band. They jumble blistering fast and painfully slow grind in such a way as to give them a distinct presence in the underground. Their side of this split illustrates both sides of their coin. A lot of bands try to mix tempos but few manage it as well as BENUMB. They are also real fans of their peer bands and it shows. I admire that. They share this record with Roscoe P. Coltrain, the sheriff from the Dukes of Hazzard (I have no idea what the actor’s name is) as he sings an ode to his dog. It is so bad as to almost not be funny.

Slap A Ham Records #33

GOB/WINK MARTINDALE

Split 7" (Gold Vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #30 of The Crass Menagerie)

What a radical split. If any band should be on a split this weird it is GOB. They just never do anything wrong. There is only one GOB tune, but what a classic. This is what noise rock was meant to be like. There isn't some catchy hook buried in the distortion ala THE JESUS LIZARD, there is simply more distortion buried in the distortion. They stack noise on top of noise. If FLIPPER and PACHINKO got in a fight and you recorded it with a micro-cassette recorder from 300 meters away while drilling into concrete with a jackhammer, you MIGHT get something akin to the audio barrage that is GOB. But noise is only the surface element. Their music is pure rock 'n roll ecstasy. The guitars are brutish, the rhythms are unforgiving, and the vocals are freakish. This is as heavy as it gets, folks. The flip side of this 7" is, well... let's just say it is not some band using the moniker of Wink Martindale, it IS Wink Martindale. If the name means nothing to you, you are in for a treat. If you do know who this is, you are probably already laughing. For more info on Wink go to www.winkmartindale.com.

Slap A Ham Records #34

(This review originally appeared in issue #60 of The Crass Menagerie)

Slap A Ham Records #35

CAPITALIST CASUALTIES

s/t

CD

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #46 of The Crass Menagerie)

This is a hardcore wet dream come true. CAPITALIST CASUALTIES are one of the most enduring and powerful hyper-core bands around. Their aural ballistics are so destructive that the band has been linked to increased seismic activity in the bay area. Certainly one of the most notable facets of the band is how prolific they are. They release so many 7"ers, splits, and compilation tracks that even diehard fans have trouble keeping track of it all. That is where this disc comes into the picture. It contains all the C.C. tracks that were released on vinyl after the release their full length, "Disassembly Line" album in 1992. The total comes to 74 songs, 70 of them originals and four of them cover tunes (NAPALM DEATH, D.R.I., ANTISCHISM, VOORHES). The running time of the disc is just short of 3 weeks and by the time it is over your mind will be reduced to a completely non-functional mass of gelatinous sludge. You gotta love that boys and girls!

Slap A Ham Records #36

SPAZZ

Sweatin' to the Oldies

CD

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #45 of The Crass Menagerie)

Anyone who reads this thing on a regular basis knows that I have a weak spot in my heart (and in my head) for the SPAZZtics out of Northern California. If you've wondered why, let me introduce "Sweatin' to the Oldies" as exhibit A. This disc contains all of the tunes from the SPAZZ back catalog (1993-1996) of spilt 7"ers, compilation tracks, and even the debut 7". A total of 64 tunes clocking in at around 55 minutes. On this disc you get it all... From the rough hewn early recordings (they made three trips into the studio in 1993 alone) to the more developed, but no less frantic, sounds of their spilt with TOAST recorded in early 1996. You experience what hardcore multiplied to the nth degree sounds like. SPAZZ are pure musical excess. They fly through rapid fire thrash and beat you senseless with snail paced riffs, often in the same tune. Their guitar sounds like a bass and the bass sounds like a sonic boom. The drums are unrelenting and combine blast beats with jazz like complexity and feel. The vocal are shared by all members and mimic the rantings of three sociopathic lunatics on a bad LSD trip in a war zone. The lyrics are teaming with anger, hatred, violence, bad ninja movies, and skateboarding are all infected with a warped sense of humor. They are the epitome of the musical neo-genre known as power violence, but as is only fitting, even that phrase is a mere cliche when measured against the grandeur of a band to who the ultimate extreme is a mere starting point. This disc equates to the bands third full length release, the previous two being "Dwarf Jester Rising" and "LaRevancha"

Slap A Ham Records #37

CAPITALIST CASUALTIES

Dope and War

7"

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #54 of The Crass Menagerie)

The prolific thrash kings are back in the saddle after a small hiatus with more bitter and angry exposés of life in the United States. Of course this band is eminently capable of putting those emotions to music. With new skinsman Max in tow, the band demonstrate that all these years hasn't dulled their edge one bit.... if anything it has honed it. They are more furious, intense, and spastic than ever. C.C. are one of the few bands who have enough experience in the studio that they have learned to capture the devastating delivery of their live set. You never go wrong with C.C. and "Dope and War" prove that yet again!

Slap A Ham Records #38

HELLNATION

At War With Emo

5" (swirled yellow /black vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #54 of The Crass Menagerie)

HELLNATION are one of the most recognized names in thrash-core. Their longetivity and impressive recorded output has elevated them to the top of their genre. It is great to see them team up with Slap-A-Ham! Especially considering this dinky disc is by far the best release from the band ever! All their trademark speed and frenzy is intact but they really flesh it all out with a rawer, heavier sound that gives HELLNATION an edge that they heretofore lacked. HELLNATION take the hardcore hotrod and floor the sucker, running over everything and everyone in their path!

Slap A Ham Records #39

MELT BANANA

Eleventh

7" (clear vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #54 of The Crass Menagerie)

These Japanese freak-a-zoids have been whacking out the underground for the last few years with their twisted and bizarre extreme hardcore. Their music lurches all over the place with a randomness that keeps you off kilter yet somehow they maintain focus and are as tight as a Republican at a benefit for the homeless. The screeching and wailing vocals of Yasuko are definitely the band's trademark... totally whacked! This 7" will become a classic. I guarantee it. The clear vinyl and the best cover art ever for a Slap-A-Ham release won't hurt either.

Slap A Ham Records #40

(This review originally appeared in issue #54 of The Crass Menagerie)

Slap A Ham Records #41

(This review originally appeared in issue #60 of The Crass Menagerie)

Slap A Ham Records #42

VARIOUS ARTISTS

Bllleeeeaaauuurrrrgghhh - A Music War

7" (Purple Vinyl - through mailorder)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #63 of The Crass Menagerie)

It’s been six years but the infamous "Bllleeeeaaauuurrrrgghhh" series is back. Yep, 73 bands, 84 songs, and one small record. This third installment shows what huge strides hyper fast hardcore has made this decade, thanks in no small part to Slap-A-Ham Records own Chris Dodge. This record could actually be called "polished" in comparison to its two older siblings. Practically every band on this comp turns in a tight as hell performance. The production quality is generally high and most of the bands are recognized names with other product out. This isn’t just a joke record with a ton of bands trying to do early A.C.ish blurrrr. These are classic hardcore "short songs" with enough punch to k.o. Tyson and all his pro-wrestling buddies. Just check out the line-up!!!!! FINAL CONFLICT, LACK OF INTEREST, 324, AVULSION, NOOTHGRUSH, SUPPRESSION, SLIGHT SLAPPERS, MELT BANANA, GODSTOMPER,

DEAD BODIES EVERYWHERE, GOB, THE DREAD, BURNED UP BLED DRY, FUCK ON THE BEACH, MK ULTRA, SLOBBER, RUIDO, BENUMB, MEXICAN POWER AUTHORITY, COMBAT WOUNDED VETERAN, ASSSPATULA, NICE VIEW,

QUADILIACHA, DISASSOCIATE, PALATKA, FLASH GORDON, JAPANESE COMEDY TORTURE HOUR, THE JUDAS ISCARIOT, SCALP-LOCK, ENEMY SOIL, CHARLES BRONSON, REAL REGGAE, MANGE, EGOTISMO, DISNEY VIOLENCE,

TOMSK 7, EXCRUCIATING TERROR, BROTHER INFERIOR, BLACK ARMY JACKET, SWISS ARMY BLANKET, BAD ACID TRIP, BEAST, DEVOID OF FAITH, DESPISE YOU, HARSH, THE MISANTHROPISTS, BASTARD NOISE, DISMAL MARSH GAS, IN, HUMANITY, RASH OF BEATINGS, AS$TROLAND, LOS CRUDOS, THE LOCUST, SOCIETY OF FRIENDS, FANATICS, SENSELESS APOCALYPSE, VILENTLY ILL, AGORAPHOBIC NOSEBLEED, UTTER BASTARD, RESIN, PRETENTIOUS ASSHOLES, LITTLE PRINCESS, ACTION JACKSON, NO LESS, POUND, HATED PRINCIPLES, YOUR MOTHER, GASP, SEVENTH VICTIM, NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS, NO THINK, GYGA, DEGRADE.

Slap A Ham Records #43

FUCK ON THE BEACH

Fastcore on the Beach

7" (White vinyl through mailorder)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #64 of The Crass Menagerie)

This Nipponese whirlwind of pummel-core is a blistering assault of aural audacity. F.O.T.B. take no prisoners and pull no punches. Each of the 14 tunes crammed onto these seven inches of vinyl is guaranteed to turn even the most tempered power violence fan into a sniveling weenie begging for mercy. The high frenzy content and unbridled barbarism of F.O.T.B. bring to mind the likes of fellow fastcore gurus SLIGHT SLAPPERS or even CHARLES BRONSON. I marvel at how bands like this can combine whimsical humor and enraged fury. Forget subtlety and don't worry about introspection, F.O.T.B. lay it all on the line and I love every second of it!

Slap A Ham Records #44

GODSTOMPER

Saturday Morning Power Violence

7" (Colored and black vinyl)

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #66 of The Crass Menagerie)

Although not GODSTOMPER's first release, this 7" is their first real "studio quality" release. That has some good and bad points. The good is that the raging bass and blistering drums are right in your face with all the rawness intact but none of the muddiness found on their other stuff. The bad is that with the new found clarity some of the limitations of only having two instruments (plus vox) are painfully obvious. In spite of the noisy, finger frying fret work of the bass and the double bass machine gun of the drums, the sound is sometimes thin. From all reports this band are an absolute storm live with a frantic stage presence and a massive sound, this record hints at that but doesn't quite catch the full impact of a live show. Maybe another bass or two would beef things up although that will rob GODSTOMPER of some of their novelty... Still a solid release and a must have for extreme hardcore freaks (like me).

Slap A Ham Records #45

SLIGHT SLAPPERS

Very Best of Slight Slappers

2" Record

Review by: Jeb

(This review originally appeared in issue #66 of The Crass Menagerie)

This is the second release from Slap-A-Ham Records that is unlistenable - literally. Like the SPAZZ 1" this is just a joke record but unlike the SPAZZ 1" there are actually some of these for sale. 666 of them to be exact. You can't play a 2" record and there's no music on it anyway but this is a cool little piece for all of us dork S.A.H. collectors. As for SLIGHT SLAPPERS they are not a joke. S.S. are an over the top fastcore band who make mandatory records and put on one of the most energetic live shows I've ever seen. They hail from Japan and are really great folks. It would be a shame if this was the only SLIGHT SLAPPER record in your collection.

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End of part two