I finally finished my CD. Man, it was a lot of work. Each song took eight hours to record. Man oh man, but it was totally worth it. If you would like a copy please e-mail me. Opera_monkey@yahoo.com --------------------------------- Believing the Art Some people would consider nonfiction to be less than entertaining. True, these stories don’t contain magic fairies, or little green elves, but that doesn’t make them less Interesting. A perfect example of a very entertaining non-fiction book is Acting is Believing. This non-fiction informational book is not only entertaining, but it is a great source of information. This particular type of non-fiction is a “how to” book. The author is describing how to act. At first, I wasn’t sure if a book could help me become a better actor. I was wrong. I feel that I know so much more about my craft. McGaw has given me great ideas and I can’t wait to apply them on stage. I would definitely read more of this type of book, because I’ve learned so much. This book was very interesting and full of new ideas about making your actions believable. What makes this book believable is that everything McGaw recommends works on stage. The reader gains trus for McGaw because he is so precise with his advice. He would describe a situation, and it would apply perfectly to something I had already experienced. For instance, he said that in order to act like you’re are experiencing pain you must believe you are in pain. When I was Eponine in Les Miserable I had an amazing death scene. Every night I would convince myself that I was truly dieing. The audience was also convinced. After every performance people told me that I was as good, if not better, than professionals they had seen. I thought that I had come up with a new way to act. I was surprised that McGaw had discovered this method already. He said believing a feeling is a trade mark of a good actor. I was impressed when I read that, and I knew that McGaw knew what he was talking about. The theme of this book is in the title, Acting is Believing. From this book I discovered that acting truly is believing. You must believe in yourself and your abilities. You must believe the actions happening on stage. You must believe the words you speak. Though the entire book, McGaw insists over and over again that in order to act well, you must forget the audience. An actor must focus entirely on the character and the other people on stage. When an actor can believe that they are a certain part, then they will be able to make believable actions with their character. The author, Charles McGaw, is very wise. He truly understands acting. The strength of this book comes from his confidence and competence as an actor. As a professor of fine arts, he understands all parts of acting. I could relate to the situations he illustrated. I easily understood the way he described certain aspects of theater. In his book, he teaches the basic methods of acting. Some people think acting is easy. McGaw shows how there is a lot more to acting than spouting a few lines and taking a bow. He explained some simple methods to acting. By focusing on the actor alone, he gives the reader ideas for finding character. Using simple methods of observation an actor can achieve an excellent performance. McGaw expresses how an actor should “get into” the play. He explains how researching the play’s setting can help you comprehend the mood of the show. He shows how actors should make all their actions believable. Throughout the book McGaw has exercises that you can use to improve your performance. This book is full of brilliant documentation. McGaw makes many references to different plays in this book. The plays he has chosen to use are a well balanced variety of theater. He has some Shakespeare some modern even some musical. He would include parts of a script from a play to prove a point. Or sometimes he would make a reference to a certain character from a show. In the back he had bibliography for every play. This book was originally written to be a textbook for an acting class. I imagine McGaw used His book many time in his acting class he taught at school of drama in Chicago. He got his MDT and acted in many popular theaters. I would say that this is an interesting book. Any actor who reads this book is bound to improve his or her acting abilities. It was refreshing to hear someone describe acting with the same passion I feel. McGaw really understood the art of acting. I could relate to the situations he described. I would recommend this book to people who not only love acting but also live for it. Without a passion for acting there really is no reason to read this book. McGaw goes so in-depth that it might become tiresome for those who don’t yearn for theater. However there was something about this book that really did bother me. The way McGraw wrote he used only male pronouns. Even the title of his first chapter, Actor and Himself, discriminated against female actors. Sometimes, I got so frustrated with his reference to all actors as men that I would change the words from he’s to she’s and him’s to her’s in my mined. I felt as if I were reading a book written for boys only. Despite this, I still felt this was a good book. The descriptions of acting were excellent. The plays he referenced were breathtaking. As an actor I would say that this was a great way to start my career.

Jonathan Stoffer A New Beginning Kirk sat at the steering wheel of his car. His wife, Sarah, lay next to him and two children, Mike and Witnee, sleeping in the back. It was late, but he wasn’t tired, he actually felt more awake than usual. As he went along, his car started to drift into the grassy meridian. He began to turn the wheel, but his body wouldn’t respond, panic struck, he tried again, nothing. Soon the car was galloping over the grass. Kirk heard his children screaming the back. His wife began shaking him, screaming for him to wake up. Finally he had control, he looked up and saw 2 bright lights blinding him, it was too late. In a flash everything changed, now he laid alone on a hard floor, it was cold and he could see nothing but himself in the darkness. Soon even that faded. Once again he lay in his bed, judging by the light coming through the window it must have been around eight. There was a time when that dream found him lying in soaked sheets nearly every morning. That was it though, after ten years the dream seemed to no longer have an affect on him. It had simple become another part of his life. Just as much a part as the clinic he was now living in. Dressed, Kirk made his way down to the cafeteria, got his breakfast and began eating in his usual corner. Same as usual he thought to himself, surveying the room. Kirk then began his morning routine of determining whether he had jet become like every other person in the clinic. Perhaps I am, I'm sure I will never stop having those dreams. No I committed myself here, I just needed a quiet place to live and work things out. For ten years? Sure, it's not like I'm in a hurry to go anywhere. You’re afraid, you try to block out any emotion about that trip, but they are still there. That’s a joke. and what about these regular conversations? Hey everyone else gets to talk to me, so why can't I? Now you’re joking. Besides, everyone else here is fully convinced they have no problem. At least I am sane enough to recognize that possibility can still exist. Once I start thinking I have no problem, then I can worry. So it was left at that, and Kirk declared himself officially sane for one more day. Just then, after he had finished his daily ritual, something unexpected happened. An old stocky man sat right in front of him at his table, his chubby face in a wide grin. "Why hello, how are you doing this fine day?" the old man said. "Tired, and you are?" asked Kirk. "Oh, where are my manners? My name is Jeffery Rogers." Jeffery quickly stood, stretching out his hand to Kirk who then accepted it. "But you can just call me Mr. Rogers for short." Jeffery added. "Clever." "Well technically I should be called Dr., but I always though Mr. was a more friendly term." "Dr. of what?" "Physics." "Well this seems like a pretty unusual place for a physics doctor to be living in, and this is the first time I've seen you, you must be new. Why are you here, one of your experiments back fire on you?" "No, No, quite the opposite actually . . . No I'm afraid that my college's felt I was getting a little too caught up in my work. They asked that I would come here for a few months to, you know, clear my mind of all my research. But, if only they knew, it’s only now that I am finally able to begin my research. Yes, but this place will work fine, nice and quiet, I can't think of a better place." "What sort of research is that?" Kirk asked. Perhaps because this was one of the only normal conversations Kirk felt he had had since he first arrived at the clinic, but he was mildly intrigued by the man. "Well, it's all very confusing and if I tried to explain it you would undoubtedly think I belong in here. Well, it was nice chatting with you eh..."Jeffery stopped. "Kirk" "Ah Kirk, yes, well, it was very nice to meet you, but I should be going, buck up though, the food here is much better than it used to be," Jeffery stood up, walked over to the trolley, deposited his tray and was gone. Soon Kirk began to piece together his own theory for why Jeffery was sent to the clinic. While walking to the library he passed Jeffery watching TV in the lounge. He considered talking to him but decided against it. Soon he was in the library and looking through the newspapers when he noticed Jeffery in the corner of the room checking his watch. How did I not notice him? He must have came in right after me. Kirk said to himself. He wouldn’t have given it a second thought had Jeffery stayed in that corner, but while returning from the library a minute later, he passed Jeffery sitting in the lobby again watching TV as though he had not moved all day. That man must have twice the energy of a ten year old, and half the attention span. Encounters like this soon became the basis for Kirk and Jeffery's fairly silent relationship. Kirk would see Jeffery wandering around the entire clinic at all hours of the day. One minute he would see him eating in the cafeteria, and the next he would be sleeping in the lounge. As far as Kirk could tell, Jeffery never stopped wandering the halls yet always seemed content on where he was and what he was doing. As time pressed on Kirk began to be accustomed to the extra unusual new addition to the clinic. He still wished he knew what the old man was up to, but whenever he confronted him, Jeffery had a way of changing the subject. Perhaps I should follow him and find out... not that it bothers me, just to make sure he isn't hurting anyone. As he started to follow Jeffery however, he found it very difficult to find anything unusual about his behavior. From the moment Jeffery left his room till he returned in the evening, he did nothing unexpected. Kirk stayed outside his room that night in hopes of some clue, yet none came. I don't get it. Kirk thought to himself, he seems to act so strange when I don't follow him, he must know what I am doing. It was at that moment, just as Kirk was heading back to his room that he heard someone coming up the stairs. Great, now the nurse is gonna lecture me about sneaking around at night. However, it was not the nurse, it was Jeffery! "What are you doing out of your room!" Kirk demanded (a little more forcefully than he meant). "Well good evening to you too, and I suppose I could be asking you the same question." "You first." Kirk tried to keep his tone more conversational. "Well I am an old man, and my bladder isn't what it used to be." "I didn't see you leave." "Well it was a while ago I left, surly you haven’t been watching my door all night?" Jeffery gave Kirk a rather accusatory look. "NO! Well no . . . you just startled me is all. I was just walking around thinking... about my wife." Kirk felt a dull pain in his chest. "I should keep going... goodnight." Kirk could feel Jeffery watching him all the way down the hall. When he turned the corner, he stopped and listened. After a minute or two of silence, he heard scratching on a piece of paper. Peering around the corner he saw Jeffery finish a note, slip it under his own door and walk back down the stairs. Kirk waited a moment, then snapped a twig off a potted bush next to him, and ran to the door. Why would he write a note to himself? Soon he had fished the note out and read it... Dear Jeffery Please do not perform any tests for 2 days. Jeffery (1 day) Kirk was already running down the stairs as he tried to understand the letter. This was too much. "What was this test? Is Jeffery performing tests on me? Maybe he wants to see how long it takes to drive someone crazy!” Kirk looked for Jeffery downstairs for another five minutes before he decided to check his room. "Open up! Now!" Kirk yelled while pounding Jeffery's door. After a moment, light was outlining the rim of the door. It opened a crack and Jeffery's round face appeared. Kirk finished opening the door and stormed in. "What the Hell is this?!" Kirk yelled, throwing the note. "Well good evening to you too. And what is wrong with this piece of paper?" "Don't play dumb and don't treat me like I'm crazy, you’re the one writing notes to yourself!” "I wrote a note to myself did I?" chuckled Jeffery. "Well then let’s see what I had to say." Jeffery held back the letter and read for a couple seconds. "Oh yes well this makes perfect sense. Thank you Kirk, you can go." "I'm not leaving 'til you tell me what's going on! And you will tell me or I'm gonna bring the head nurse in here right now!" Jeffery stared at Kirk for a long time, clearly annoyed. "Okay, but you won’t believe me anyway, so I fail to see what good all this will do." "Try me." "Well then, where too begin? Have you ever wished you could change the past?" "Yes." "What would you say if I said you could." "At first I would call you crazy, but I’ll give you the benefit of doubt, for now.” This response seemed to surprise Jeffery," Well I'm not sure how well we can change our past but we can visit it." "What are you saying? That you invented a time machine?" Jeffery didn't answer, instead he turned around and pulled a shoe box out of the top drawer of his cabinet. He placed it on the table and inside was a solid black object shaped like a half moon with a light on top and a switch on the side. Next to the object was what appeared to be a large wrist watch with several buttons and knobs, syringe and a jar of milky liquid. “This box, contains 35 years of research.” Jeffery finally said. “35 years? I think I Found one of those watches in my Cherrios.” “This is no joke! But if you just want to mock me you can leave . . . This is what has been confusing you. This is also, as you put it, my “time machine”. I know it looks simple and perhaps a little weird, but if you allow me to explain I promise all your questions will be answered… and I can finally go to bed.” “Explain then, who am I to stop you.” After seeing Jeffery’s excuse for a time machine, Kirk began to come to his senses about the whole thing. “I won’t bore you with the details, but since I have been here I have been conducting tests. Various tests on the effects of time jumping, this is most likely the strange behavior you have seen.” Jeffery then began a long explanation of time travel and his various tests. After several minutes Kirk interrupted him. “So what your saying is…that letter is from a Jeffery from the future who is confirming some test of his.” Kirk was sure Jeffery was crazy at this point. I wonder how far I can make him go? He thought and decided to ask about the box. “This is what makes it all possible.” Jeffery started taking things out of the box. “This,” he took out the small black dome, “is a marker, it stays here, in this time, it ensures that I always come back to my home, this watch goes on me, it links up with my computer so I can input my “travel log” I guess, it then fallows the path I give to it. The liquid makes sure that when the watch leaves and comes back, I go with it.” “So how does it all work?” “That’s a big answer.” Jeffery chuckled. “Basically I inject the liquid in my body, set the marker, and put on the wrist band. The band sends out a signal that excites all the molecules in the liquid to a certain frequency, it then links up with all matter within a certain distance from each molecule, and takes them on it’s journey . . . So now that you think I’m crazy I’m going to bed.” Jeffery started to put his shoe box away. “Wait.” Kirk suddenly had a thought, “Can I give your time machine a try?” Kirk could barely contain himself at this point. Indulging Jeffery was the most fun he had had in a long time. I’m probably destroying weeks of therapy. He thought to himself. “This is no toy! You must be crazy if…” Kirk couldn’t contain himself any longer and began laughing, “Me! Not you! Me! I’m sorry but this is all too much. I mean listen to yourself, you have a time machine in a shoe box!” Jeffery looked as though he was using great effort to stay calm his face was almost shining red. “Fine if you want to try my machine let’s get you started.” He whispered. “Aren’t you scared I’ll run off with your Rolex?” Kirk laughed. “It always comes back. But please if I’m crazy let’s how far my delusion reaches.” Kirk hadn’t actually considered using Jeffery’s “machine”. However he knew that Jeffery must use it, so figured it was probably safe and good for another laugh. “Okay your all set… So where would you like to go, how long, and when? The machine can go up to 400 years back and can send your signal up 100 miles from this point.” “Only 400 years? I thought you had the deluxe model. Okay fine, April 14, 2038, 12 PM let’s say half hour and just set me down somewhere downtown on Billard Street.” “You rattled that off pretty fast, just over ten years ago eh? Where are you going?” “Visit my wife, it’s been a while since I had a home cooked meal.” Jeffery paused a moment looking at him, then silently typed a command on his computer. For a couple seconds nothing happened, then, suddenly Kirk felt as though his entire body was being compressed under great pressure. An instant later he felt nothing, except for what he thought was Jefferies floor. It felt too ruff though, Kirk looked up and saw he was lying in the middle of an alleyway he recognized as being off Billard. He stayed there for several minutes trying to understand what had just happened. At length he had no answer (at least none he was ready to believe). Grabbing a news paper and began asking people if it was the correct date. Suddenly he froze over several peoples heads he saw his own bobbing over the sea of people. Clearly younger but still him. Kirk couldn’t move or think, for a moment he had stopped breathing, till a large group of people brought him back while pushing by. Like an exploding dam thoughts rushed through his mind fast than he could finish them. Till one thought hit him like a freight train… Today is the day I lost them and he is going home now to take them! This was his chance to undue everything, he ran to catch up with himself. “KIRK!!” he yelled. The young man turned around, “Yes?” Fifteen minutes had already past, Kirk couldn’t waist any more. “Stay home tonight, don’t go out!” “What? Hey you look a lot like me… in 15 years perhaps.” “Ten” Kirk retorted feeling somewhat insulted. “But that’s doesn’t matter, stay home!” “Alright fine, ten. Now who are you?” “Shut up about me and my stupid age! Listen, you can’t leave your house tonight!” “Why?” “Just trust me, it’s not safe.” “Wait I have plans tonight, and why should I even trust you when you refuse to tell me who you are.” Kirk was getting very angry at this point. Time was running out and his past self wanted to play games. “Look I’m with a gang who are going to work you’re street tonight. If you stay home my men will skip your house.” “So why are you telling me this, seems counter productive to your cause.” “Because I’m nice” Kirk growled. “Well thanks for the tip. Tell you what, I’ll call the cops and have em watch my house for me then I can still go out right?” Kirk couldn’t take it anymore, there was under 10 minutes left and he had made no progress. Kirk grabbed his younger self, threw him against a building and started yelling, “If you go out tonight your family will die!” The young man pushed Kirk back, “You stay away from my family!” He then started running away. “Fool!” Kirk charged after him, enraged with the young mans stubbornness. Kirk grabbed the back of the young mans coat and began to pull him back when the man pulled out of his coat and shot across an intersection. It all happened so fast Kirk was still organizing the events as he sat back in Jeffery’s room. The young Kirk was hit by a crossing truck. As he watched the young lifeless body of his former self Kirk waited for himself to disappear or die next to him or something… but nothing happened, the timer expired and now he sat in Jeffery’s room having just relayed his experience and asked for an explanation. “Now then, the results have been quite interesting, it seems that the change you made in the past, does not exist in this time.” Jeffery said. “But, if I changed the past why would the change not be there in my time?” “It’s the paradox portrayed in old movies. What would happen if someone changed the past in such a way that would cause the past versions of themselves to not go back in time. What my research has shown, and you just confirmed, is that our existence is not stretched over history. We exist in one spot, here in this time, a basic law of physic’s nothing can occupy more than one space. There are other versions of us in each moment of time, and although they may look and act just like us, they are not us and they do not live in our dimension…. Let me put it this way… a movie, a movie has separate frames right? Okay so if you took one frame from a movie and changed it, say put all the characters on a ship, would it change any other frames in the movie?” “No, you never touched them and they have no effect on each other.” “EXACTLY! Yes so you see that is what you did. You changed one frame in time. Now we could get into creating new dimensions and paths for every choice but…” “So wait, you’re saying my family is still gone and everything I did had no impact?” “In this time yes. You have to stop thinking of all the moments of time as being dependant on each other. They exist together as a timeline only but what happens in each has no bearing on the others.” “So why am I alive now? Shouldn’t of some future me killed me ten years ago?” “He probably would have, except someone must have killed him first, if you understand me.” Kirk sat, in silence, for a long time as Jeffery prepared for bed. Jeffery gave respect to his silence and made no attempt to move him out. It wasn’t until he began to put away his shoe box that he finely asked Kirk for his wrist band. “Hold on. Is this watch still linked to the time I just left?” It took some time but eventually Jeffery agreed to allow Kirk one final trip back to see the family he saved. This was only after Kirk agreed to let Jeffery get some sleep first, and under the condition that he would never bother Jeffery about it again. “I’m going to go have breakfast and take my morning walk, so I’ll give you two hours then I’ll come back and get you disconnected. If I’m not here, please don’t leave my room or try to put my stuff away for me, just wait.” “I’m not a child Mr. Rogers, don’t worry, I’m not going to do anything reckless.” “Well It’s not my life messing with, just my life’s work. So I’d appreciate it if you were careful… Okay ready when you are.” “Maybe when I get back we can publish your result with my story, we could call it How to go back in time, kill yourself, and live to tell the tale.” Kirk gave Jeffery a thumbs up. Jeffery laughed, returned the thumbs up back to Kirk and typed the final command into his computer. With that parting Jeffery went off to perform his morning routine and Kirk went back to his family. Then, just over two hours later, Jeffery returned to his bedroom to find an empty wrist band lying on his floor.