| ~*Do You Know Jack Shit?*~ |
| The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "You don't know Jack Shit." Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe Shit and O. Shit. Awe Shit, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Shit, the owner of Needeep N Shit Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Shit married Noe Shit, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Shit, Fulla Shit, Giva Shit, Bull Shit, and the twins: Deap Shit and Dip Shit. Against her parent's objections, Deap Shit married Dumb Shit, a highschool dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Shit divorced. Noe Shit later remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Shit-Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Shit married Loda Shit and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Shit. Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Shit and Giva Shit, were inseparable throughout childhood and susequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding anouncement in the newspape announced the Shit-Happens wedding. The Shit-Happens childred were Dawg, Byrd and Hoarse Shit-Happens. Bull Shit, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride Pisa Shit. Sow now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Shit", you can correct them. Family History recorded by Crock O. Shit. |