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Following the Pele tour, Tori discovered she was pregnant and was, "over the moon about it". Devastatingly, only 3 months into the pregnancy she had a miscarriage. She has talked in several interviews how it affected her and inspired a lot of the songs on her 4th album, "From The Choirgirl Hotel", released in May 1998 - which would later debut at No. 5. "The songs started coming not long after I miscarried. The strange thing is, the love doesn't go away for this being that you've carried. You can't go back to being the person you were before you carried life. And yet you're not a mother, either, and you still are connected to a force, a being. And I was trying to find ways to keep the communication going, along the way on the search, sort of walking with the undead, I would run into these songs. The one thing they kept saying to me was I had to find a deep woman's rhythm. You begin to create where you can. If you can't create physical life, you find a life force. If that's music, that's in the music. I started to find this deep, primitive rhythm, and started to move to it. And I held hands with sorrow, and I danced with her, and we giggled a bit. And this record really became about being alive enough to feel things, no matter what it is." |