From One Couple To The Other
***
Part 4
Laying in his apartment, Shinya was crushed. That was the
worse thing he had ever seen in his crappy life and now it felt even
more crappy and meaningless. Maybe he should stick to not talking...
Having a fight with the others wasn't really a good idea. He knew
it
would make Kaoru very happy too if Toshiya left Die be, but it
wasn't
right to separate a couple in love. But he was in love too and it was
cruel to be left alone too. Kaoru was the only one to know, why
didn't he tell Toshiya? Maybe it would have kept him from asking Die
out.
Considering Die was actually free to catch, Shinya scratched his
head. "Toshiya wouldn't have done that, he flirts with anybody. Even
with Kaoru and me, he'll stop at nothing." Shinya hated that thought
very much. He wanted to be teased by Die again and Toshiya to go
away. No matter how mean he could get sometimes, he wanted it so
badly, he could cry.
It had been fifteen minutes, fifteen minutes looking like an
animal in his cage. Staying is his corner and looking at the same
spot for hours, as it seemed to him. The little drummer stood up and
started to walk around thinking, what should he do? He could have
pulled his hair if he still had his long ones but with that job he
had done a couple of days ago, he didn't want to look like a monk.
Besides, he wouldn't look very good, Die would just laugh at him,
like he usually did every time Shinya did something wrong or
embarrassing.
That's when he stopped walking. Raising his head as he realised
something he never saw before. He loved Die that much didn't he? Of
course he did! He loved him so much it hurt, hurt to hear him tease
him, to see him smile to others, to see him being hugged by somebody
else. It hurt...it hurt...it hurt so badly.
He started walking again but towards a mirror. He had to do
something, something entertaining, something that would get his mind
at peace. How about a little shopping? Maybe he should change his
doll look. He hadn't really changed since he'd joined Dir en grey, he
didn't want to change it. Die like it so...
But Die liked his long hair too, that didn't stop him from cutting
them. Maybe he'll like the other style. "I should try skirts, like
Toshiya." Playing the second Toshiya in the band wasn't really his
idea, but if Die turned his head because of it, it was worth it.
Shinya smiled to himself, a new style it is. Picking up his coat and
his wallet, he opened the door and raced down the hall. He couldn't
wait to see Die's face the next morning.
***************
"Don't you get what you just done? Shinya was falling apart!"
So was Kaoru, Kyo thought, but Toshiya didn't need to hear it from
him. He had to find out by himself. Of course, the singer wanted to
help his buddy Kaoru, but that wasn't the way. Toshiya was too
innocent.
He even looked more innocent when he attacked Kyo with his puppy
eyes. Kyo threw his hands in the hair, where did that come
from? "Toshiya! You're not listening!" Almost crashing down on the
carpet of their apartment, Kyo hit the floor with one fist. "You're
going to tell Shinya it was a joke, you know Shin-chan is in love
with Die!" Toshiya looked away, how stubborn!
Kyo was already very angry and the bassist wasn't helping at
all. Standing up, he took Toshiya shirt with one hand and pulled him
close to his nose. "Now, don't do me that shit, you stop right now!
I'm already very pissed off!" Toshiya pushed Kyo slightly and looked
at him with empty eyes. Kyo didn't understand...
"You don't get it do you Kyo? You really don't!" Turning around,
Toshiya ran into his room and slammed the door shut. Kyo was stunned.
What was that all about now? The little man was getting a headache,
they seemed to be coming in groups that week.
He heard a knock. Looking at the door before realising it
actually came from there, Kyo sighed. Who could that be? He opened
the door and was surprised by whom he saw. Looking back in, he eyed
Toshiya's door. He got out of the apartment and closed the door
behind him. "Die, what are you doing here?"
The guitarist didn't even smile or say hello. "Can't we go inside? I
want to talk to Toshiya about the "going out" thing." That's what he
thought, Die had listened to him like he always did. But it wasn't a
good time, Toshiya would never let go. The bassist had his little
idea and Kyo didn't think Die could do something about it. "Maybe you
should come later, Toshiya isn't in a good mood." Kyo was getting
tired, tired of all the playing around. Tired of everything and he
couldn't sleep as much as he used to. Because of Toshiya's blabbering
and Die's gloomy state. The two others were in bad condition too, but
they seemed to support each other. Kyo didn't want to be caught up in
their messed up feelings too, he stayed as far away as he could from
the other two.
He did like his other band mates, but it was different. Kaoru
was a good buddy and Shinya a lucky bastard. They did hang out a lot
more then he did with Toshiya of even Die. But now...dealing with two
of them was enough and already demanding for him. God, he needed to
sleep very badly.
Massaging the sides of his head, Kyo shook it. Really not a good
time, not a good time. "Die, I'm trying to make him stop already and
he ran in his room." Kyo wanted to sit down, he was so tired.
Die smiled and put his hand on his friend's shoulder. He
didn't really think Kyo would do it even if he secretly wanted him
to. He didn't know how to thank him, but he had to, Kyo looked
so...well, tired and that was unusual. Kyo was always sleeping...
"I'm so grateful, I didn't even know how I would have told him." Die
knew he was being childish, letting his friend do the job for him.
Even worse, he was now looking like an idiot in front of his band
mate. He could have thought of an answer more intelligent, but in
front of Kyo, Die was always being himself. Kyo understood him, he
always did.
Kyo chuckled. "Why did you come here then?" Die looked down
on Kyo, what an odd question. "I wanted to fix things." Die started
to pout, wasn't it obvious? Everything was messed up and Toshiya
fooling around wasn't getting anybody anywhere. Even if it did, that
wasn't the "somewhere" Die wanted.
How cute, Kyo thought. He really wanted that didn't he, but for his
own good of course. He smiled to the guitarist, that was so like him.
So like him, wanting to same the world like that. Maybe it was more
for Kaoru then for himself too, Kyo knew Die had seen Kaoru's face
when he'd came in the studio. "How nice of you, maybe Kaoru will have
more chance with Toshi after that. " The singer laughed, and I'll
have a little chance with you. He sighed, of course not...
Die grinned, Kyo could read him perfectly. What a great
friend he was, the best he could ever have. So caring and
understanding, but Kyo wasn't always like that. Die could remember at
first how scary he looked, talking about bloody stuff. But after a
couple of months he'd soften and got closer to Die. Helping Die with
his feelings and all. At first, Kaoru knew too, it was when Toshiya
wasn't there. The first days of Dir en grey, but now it was all
messed up, all of it.
Die's smile slowly disappeared and he got the little singer closer
hugging him as hard as he could. He didn't know what he had done
without him, what a great friend. "Thank you Kyo, thank you so much."
Turning around, Die left slowly.
Kyo was stunned. He clumsily opened the door and got in
trying not to make a sound. But he was so depressed, a friendly
hug...only as friends. But his touch, his sent... How he smiled and
he laughed with him, everything was only friendly. Not teasing like
he did with Shinya, the way Die showed how he loved somebody. The
more he teased, the more he loved. But Did never teased Kyo, well
maybe once in a while, but only meaningless jokes. Not the rash ones
he gave to Shinya. But that hug...it was more then Kyo have ever
supported. I little longer and he would have melted completely in
Die's arms. But the little singer didn't want Die to know, ever! Or
their friendship would be ruined for ever.
Closing the door slowly, the little man tried to make his heart stop
bumping like that. Clutching on his shirt, he bit his tong.
Breath...try to breath normally. He didn't know a hug could hurt so
much.
Seeking down on the floor his back on the door, he pulled his knees
near his face and started to cry silently.
But he wasn't that silent at all. Toshiya's door was just
next to the entrance and he'd heard Die's voice so he kept near it.
He didn't understand what they had talked about, but still...he
wanted to know if Die would come to talk to him or something else.
They had to make a plan, Shinya had to take Die from him. And the
bassist needed his red headed friend to play the part, but he didn't.
Kyo wanted to stop him too, nobody understood how he felt. Nobody at
all...not even Kyo!
Kyo, whom he lived with since he had joined Dir en grey, since
forever! Kyo who always agreed his plans and fooling around as it was
funny. But just keep it to Kaoru, he'd always say. What was that all
about?
Toshiya was very mad, he never thought he could be in such a
bad mood. Everybody was against him and all he wanted was their
happiness. Even the one he knew the best and trusted the most!
How frustrating, how frustrating, HOW FRUSTRATING! He wanted to kick
them all, make them feel guilty for not understanding his actions.
And now...what was Kyo doing? Trying to find a way to get him
to stop? But Toshiya wasn't going to yield, never! He wanted Die and
Shinya to be happy and that's what was going to happen. If not, he
would start to call himself...moron if it helped!
Putting his ear on the door, the tall bassist listened. What
was that odd noise? He thought Die had left... Maybe it wasn't him,
but Kyo never made strange noises. Kneeling down, as it seemed to
come from the floor, Toshiya tried to hear what it was.
Crying? Straightening himself up he shook his head, that couldn't be
it. It had to be something else, maybe the television or something
like that...but near the door? Putting his hear back on the door,
Toshiya's expression changed. It was...it was! Toshiya couldn't
believe it! It actually was! Kyo....Kyo was crying!
***
Well, how fun could it get. Keep sending feedback and tell me if
anything is wrong, I'll try to correct next time, arigatou ^^
Sei-chan ^.^
to be continued...
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