Like I mentioned earlier, this one made it's way to me and I liked it so much that I copied it's contents here. I highly recommend that you fill it out and send it to people you know. You'll get some pretty interesting responses from people. If they're interesting people, that is. If you want to, feel free to send one to me. I promise I won't laugh at you or anything. Actually, I can't make that promise. I like laughing at things. Just about everything is funny in one way or another. Try me. I go best with milk.
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WHAT IS YOUR...
Nickname? Karl Gruber, King Simian, Supernakedman, and Batman.
Age? 27 (no Dirty ol' Man jokes you young whippersnappers)
Real hair color? auburn
Eye color? brown (green when I'm horny)
Best feature? Everything but my modesty.
Birthplace? Augsburg, West Germany
Hometown? Oak Ridge, TN
Siblings names & ages? None. I ate them all when I was a child.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE...
Color? Because Black isn't technically a color (or even a hue) I choose purple.
Number? 5 (all hail Eris!)
Movies? Dune, Aliens, The Game, The Pest, and the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and another billion movies that have helped define my generation
Soft drink? Dr. Pepper or Death
Candy? No thank you.
Ice cream? I'm telling ya, I don't like sweets.
Foreign food? My last girlfriend won me over by cooking me Italian
Juice? Grapefruit
TV shows? Frasier, News Radio, and whatever comes on ZDTV
Animal? MONKEYS!!!
Person? Patrick Morgan, for saving my ass so many times
Time of year? New Years Eve (isn't forgiveness grand?)
Chap-Sstick? Whatever I can taste on cute girls lips
Thing to do on weekends? Get in and out of trouble.
Website? Simian Jihad Paintball
Bands? The BeeGees, Wagner and Vivaldi (composers), NIN, Bloodhound Gang (first album only), Primus, Ministry, Rob Zombie, Led Zepplin, Chemical Brothers, and many others that I can't remember just now.
Groups? The Company of the Sword, Darkholm, the NRA, the Kids in the Hall, Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Soloists? I prefer harmonies
Actress? Clair Danes has the most fascinating mannerisms. I am so in love with her.
Actor? Nobody can beat Tim Curry. Nobody can beat his acting versatility. He's even better than Gary Oldman and Christopher Walkin. Who else could play the butler from Clue (Cadbury), an alien transvestite nymphomaniac, AND the sheer villainy of Darkness and the Cardinal from the 3 musketeers?
TV channel? ZDTV or the History Channel
Radio station? 99.7 when I’m in Atlanta
Country? No preference. Germany I guess.
State? Excited (chemistry joke)
Vacation? Skin diving in the Caribbean
Past- time role model? All incarnations of James Bond or Gonzo from the Muppets.
*SIMPLY WRONG OR RIGHT........NO IN BETWEEN*
Abortion- Right
Evolution- Undeniable
16 to drive- Sure
21 to drink- Fine
18 to vote (i think)- Ok
18 to be considered "adult"- Wrong. I'm 24 and I'm -still- not an adult. Fuck anyone who says otherwise.
Racism- WRONG
Affection in public- Love everyone you can get your hands on. Public is fine, on stage is better.
Child labor- Stealing the carefree innocence of youth is a capital crime because it's the only real time we're ever truly happy on this earth.
Capital punishment- Right. People who have been committed of these crimes have proven themselves to be hostile towards a civilized society and as such should not be allowed into one. 80% of life-term inmates and capital offense criminals are below the age of 26 years. It costs the rest of society forty thousand dollars a year per inmate to be kept behind bars. combine this to an average life span of 70 years, and each criminal costs society almost two million dollars. It only costs twelve cents to end their tortured existence in the world they hate so much.
Bill Clinton- Wrong ass bastard took away my rights to get the most fun firearms ever invented!
Animal testing on products- That's what inmates are for.
Divorce- Divorce is a necessary institution for the fools who rush into decisions that should have been weighed much more carefully and need it unless they have to regret the rest of their lives.
War- "There is no god but man.
.....Man has the right to live by his own law-to live in the way that he wills to do: to work as he will: to play as he will: to rest as he will: to die when and how he will.
..... Man has the right to eat what he will; to drink what he will: to dwell where he will: to move as he will on the face of the earth.
..... Man has the right to think what he will: to speak what he will: to write what he will; to draw, paint, carve, etch, mold, build as he will: to dress as he will.
..... Man has the right to love as he will.
..... Man has the right to kill those who thwart these rights."

-The Equinox: A Journal of Scientific Illuminism, 1922 (edited by Aleister Crowley)
HAVE YOU EVER.............
Been offered drugs? In quantities you'll hopefully never see.
Done drugs? Only until I got smart.
Smoked? Ew, don't remind me...
Gotten drunk? What better way to get into trouble on the weekends? Wake up in the morning and figure out who's bed your in and if they are married.
Been shot at? Waay too often (and I'm not talking about paintballs)
Gone to another country? Does being born there and going back count?
Cheated on your boy/girlfriend? Waay too many times. To quote one of my EX-girlfriends; "High school is a time of learning, searching, and infidelity". Needless to say, it's not high school anymore.
Gone skinny dipping? Jumping off of a 30 foot cliff into the icy river below is real big with my friends and I. I don't know if it's because we like swimming, like being naked, or if it was the alcohol all those times...
Pretended you're in a movie? I'm currently starring in the sequel to my first life. True story. I've got the scars to prove it.
Gone to jail? Waay more than I would like to have. You always meet some of the most interesting people in jail, like Swamp-pussy, who kept eating Fritos that he had cleverly hidden somewhere in the crotch of his uniform.