Ted

Ted lives and breathes

Ted and I go way back. Almost a year ago when I started the first group, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HSPaddle/ , which is still there unattended. Ted was there at the beginning. When I lost access to my own group, Yahoo! Yahoo!, and decided to build a new one, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/highschoolpaddle/ , Ted was there. And when I started thinking that although high school is probably the place where I got interested in paddling, I really am not interested in the debate about whether or not corporal punishment in schools is effective or not. My interest is me and my butt right now, giving and taking swats, I formed this group, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/tradingswats/ to reflect my real interests. Ted was there. But now I'm to tell you that Ted was HERE. Waz that mean? The Internet is a big place. It is a World Wide Web, and you can have buddies that live the other end of geography, and even though you got common interests, it's next to impossible to get your butts together. Now I live in Indiana. And Ted lives in Iowa. A lot of Illinois in between. Who ever goes to Iowa? I drove through Iowa once, I think. We won't even ask who comes to Indiana. But in between lies Chicago. The crossroads of the world, and Ted who I've known for now like forever and yet never met, writes, hey I'm going to be in Chicago, how about we get our butt together. And so it was. At the last minute I wrote him a quick message, family emergency sort of, probably have to call it off, call first. But Ted is not one who checks his e-mail regularly, and in the mean time family emergency resolved itself, and at the predetermined time, Ted arrives at my door, unaware that he wasn't expected to be there, or at least should phone first. But it was great. Would be greater if he were writing this. Would always be greater, if the guys whose butts I bust would send a response to the group, but no, leave it to old Bill to act like he's the only one in the whole world getting any pleasure out of this. Actually Ted has already e-mailed me to let me know he has a happy butt, and wants to make a return visit on Presidents Day. Sounds like a patriotic thing to do, bust some butt. I know somebody else who's got Presidents Day off work, and that's a guy really deserves a busted butt because I never hear from him. That's another story.

Back to Ted's butt. I was pleased to see him standing at my door. Pretty big guy. He traveled through ice and snow and lots of cold across the Chicago Skyway to the cornfields of Indiana. No corn fields in this part of Indiana, mostly railroad tracks. Big guy, but you're all big guys in comparison to me. But that's good, more butt to paddle. Ted wanted to catch his breath and tell some tales. Over a long time he's had some paddling experiences. Once I get a guy down my basement, I'm ready to whack butt. But he made it interesting. Brought some history with him. Three lovely paddles. One was his from old frat days, stories to tell, giving and receiving. And then a wonderful flee market piece, all covered with a beatiful column of signatures all the way down the paddle. Whose are the names, pledges? naughty students? His guess is that it was a pledge paddle. So this is where we begin. Ted is maybe not too eager. Says it's been a while. So we let him start on my butt. I think he wants to hit me. But then I'll get to hit back. But got to try these beautifully crafted boards he's brought. So we each take five with this one, then that one, then the other. Great sound, great feel, history comes alive. Then naturally he has to get a taste of my toys. Big long oar paddle, Big Blue, the lovely thick paddles I've made myself. Even some belts. Ted's resistent to being hit with a wooden spoon and is maybe a little surprised what an effect it has. In the end, Ted couldn't stay long. He's on the road and weather's not good. But he's a guy I'm glad I know. And now I know his butt too. And I'll hope he makes a patriotic reappears soon. If I'm lucky, I may get some support in dealing with his butt

Ted writes: Bill lives and breathes, too

Well, I can't add much to what Bill wrote. I'm a big guy, he's not so big. But we both have asses that need to be warmed up from time to time, and I'm glad things worked out to get it done.

He has an awesome collection of tools, and he can use every last one of them quite well. (well, the oar paddle is pretty hard to handle--I had trouble, and so did Bill). I think I used most of them ok, too, but maybe not as hard as Bill likes. I'll have to practice.

Now, about the spoon. Never been hit with a spoon before, and it WAS a hot effect.

Course, I'm mostly a paddle kind of guy. I like to use them and like to have them used on me. And, as Bill said, I brought three of my own. Next time, I'll have to bring more of my collection -2 others of my old frat paddles, another my dad must have used in a masonic rite, 2 others I bought at college book stores, and a couple I made, one from a piece of shoe sole leather, the other from a piece of mahogany with holes drilled down it. Also made one from a rubber car floor mat.

I'm hoping the President's day trip will work out. And I'm interested in meeting some of Bill's other spanking buddies.

Thanks Bill, for a buttwarming good time.

Oh, and btw, I've driven the Chicago Skyway frequently over the last 25 years, and it has ALWAYS been under construction. What's that about?

Happy swatting

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/tradingswats/

tradingswats@yahoo.com