| The First Moonblood The First Blood is a very important time in every young woman's life. For some girls this can be a very tramatic time but we should make every effort to be sure it is not anymore. The attitudes of friends and family, and their reactions to this very special event will have an affect on how well it is taken by the girl herself and will shape her attitudes on bleeding for the rest of her life. For those of us with bad experinces it is hard to shed that baggage and negative energy that is associated with the Moonblood, for those with wonderful experinces their Courses will probably never cause them much trouble and the transition from girl to young woman will be smoother and gentler. The first moonblood is the dividing point between what makes a girl and girl and woman a woman. In earlier years the first blood signaled that she was fertile and ready for childbearing but in our modern times the blood comes sooner and sooner from around 14 to 16 the normal ages are now from 8 to 16, leaving a huge gap between childbearing and the first blood. In the past rituals were used to mark this event in the young woman's life but today it is more often shoved under the rug and treated as something shameful. Our daughters more often than not are expected to cross the bridge from girlhood to womanhood as if nothing has ever happened and go on with her daily life hiding this fact. By treating menstruation this way from the start we are teaching women to be shameful of their body and their sexuality but we should not. My first blood was a less than wonderful experince. First, I was only 11 at the time and none of my friends had it yet. Next, I was not terribly close to my mother and didn't feel very confident talking to her about "personal matters." Typically, I first noticed at school and had a male teacher at the time. I waited until we switched classrooms for math class, where I had a female teacher, and whispered in her ear what had happened and asked if I could go to the nurse. With a very suprised look the teacher scribbled a pass out for me and asked if I was allright, to which I answered yes. At that point in time I had a read a book on puberty, knew what was up and that it was "okay" and what it signified and didn't think too much about it. My mother and I had never had a chat and I knew some people got cramps and other problems but I also knew some women didn't and I had no problems. A close friend at the time went to the nurse with me. I kept it a secret from my family until I had run out of my supply of feminine products and finally told my mother in an offhand way that I was out and needed more. That was it. No ritual, no nothing, life as usual; but I can't help thinking this should have been a more positive experince and that I did indeed miss out on what should have been one of the most special events of my life. There are other ways to celebrate though. Oftentimes a young woman will share this special event with her friends and in most cases her mother. We should make this a special time for young women and something to teach them to be proud and respect their bodies not hide them and be ashamed. Really, what is done and how many people and who are included should be up to the young woman; it is afterall her special time. In many Native American traiditon the first blood is celebrated with a Blessingway of sorts. Other ideas are to take your daughter out for dinner, or if she's not feeling like it make her favourite meal, bake a cake, invite some of her friends over. Design a special ritual together, give her a special gift. If you used a certain stone at her "baby blessing/naming" ritual then this is a good time to give her that stone. If she is old enough and you feel mature enough you may want to consider initiating her into the craft or your coven. A special gift should be given at this time and maybe even a special chat about boys. Another option for a ritual is a solitary type ritual, for young women who would rather not share this special event in their life with everyone out of shyness or simply not wanting to. Create a special poem, or piece of artwork to symoblise this special time in your life. Pamper yourself, give yourself a facial, get your nails done, just generally take care of yourself. Meditate. |