| *First and foremost, I do not own M*A*S*H or any of its characters. I just enjoy them, and I enjoy writing about them. I'm not making any money off of their use (if you need any proof, just check my pockets!). Secondly, this plot idea was not originally mine. It was a discarded plot from the show, and hopefully I won't get sued for using it without permission! I just used the main idea of it, changed it to suit my needs, and evolved it into something totally my own. The barest thread of the original plot remains (I even changed the number of nurses), but still I felt that I should mention this fact. Well, I hope you enjoy! Consequences By Cathy W. "I had a great time, Hawkeye," Sarah Brighton, the new nurse, said as she kissed Hawkeye again and reluctantly made her way out of the Swamp. "I'm sure you did," Hawkeye replied, eyes twinkling in mischief. "It was all part of my master plan to get you to go out on a date with me again next Saturday night, around eight." "Count me in," she answered. "I can't wait. Why don't we make our date in the supply room though? I'm sure Frank has to leave Major Houlihan's tent every once in a while to sleep in here." She laughed and shut the door with a bang. A moment later, BJ walked in, back from Post-Op duty. He saw his friend's statement and asked curiously, "Date?" "With Sarah," he answered, his face lighting up. "Oh, the new nurse, right? How'd it go? Good, I see." "Good doesn't even begin to describe it. Magnificent, phenomenal, wonderful, fantastic...." BJ held up his hand. "I get it, I get it. It was great. So, are you planning another date any time soon?" "As a matter of fact, we have one Saturday night." "Wait, aren't you supposed to go out with Lisa then?" "Lisa! I almost forgot. I think our date's for seven that night. Well, I made plans with Lisa first, so I guess I'll have to postpone the one with Sarah." "Should you really be trying to juggle two women?" "Well, they're both wonderful..." "Be careful, Hawk, or this could all blow up in your face," BJ warned. "Don't worry," Pierce answered as he got a drink from the Still. ***Later That Day*** "Sarah, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but I can't go out on a date with you Saturday. I'd forgotten, but I already made plans." "With who?" Sarah asked suspiciously. It was no secret that Hawkeye was the camp Romeo, but to be dating different women at the same time....well, she'd have thought that he was better than that. "Umm, BJ," he answered quickly. "Okay," she replied, hoping it was true. She really liked him and didn't want it over between them so soon. "How about next Friday night, at eight?" he proposed, putting on a roguish grin. "Okay, but you've got to warn BJ that you two won't have a date together then." She smiled, and he laughed at her little joke. "I'll be sure to tell him, but he'll be heartbroken. He complains that I never take him out anymore." He turned and walked back to the Swamp. ***In the Swamp*** "Beej, I need a big favor. If Sarah asks, we have plans Saturday night," Hawkeye told his friend, with big puppy-dog eyes practically begging him to say yes. "How could I say no to a face like that? But this is the only time. I'm not going to become a permanent part of this love triangle you have going on." "I owe you one," Hawk said in relief. "Just don't make it a habit," BJ added and went back to darning his socks. ***Saturday Night, Around Seven O'Clock*** "Come on," Lisa Burkhead said, laughing. She was holding Hawkeye's hand, pulling him into the Officer's Club. "I want a drink first." "We could get one from the Still," Hawkeye suggested desperately. He was afraid that someone would spot them and things would go awry. "What, that nasty rat poison? I don't think so." Noticing the look on his face, she added angrily, "Are you ashamed of me or something? Is there some reason you don't want to go out in public with me?" "No, no," he hastily answered. "I just thought our date would be much lovelier if it was more intimate." "I just want a quick drink, then we can go back to my tent." They walked in and Hawkeye quickly looked around. He sighed in relief. No sign of Sarah. He led her toward a table in the back, in the corner. When Igor came around for their order, he asked for a martini and she for a scotch on the rocks. He began to relax after a while, and later they both ordered seconds, then thirds. "I'll be back in a minute," he said suddenly. After three martinis, he was feeling....a call of nature. "Okay, but don't take too long," Lisa replied. As he walked out the doors of the Officer's Club, he didn't even notice who was walking in. Sarah surveyed the room, looking for someone to sit with. Noticing Lisa by herself, she headed toward the table. "Hi....Lisa, isn't it?" At Lisa's nod, she asked, "Do you mind if I sit here?" "Well, actually, I'm on a date. He'll be back in a minute." "Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt. Anybody I know?" she asked curiously, as she didn't know very many people at the unit yet. "Hawkeye Pierce," Lisa answered. "Hawkeye?" she asked angrily. "Yes, Hawkeye. You know him, don't you?" "Yes, very well. We were supposed to have a date tonight, but he cancelled it, saying he had plans with BJ. We're supposed to go out again next Friday night at eight." "Are you sure? I mean, that it's the same Hawkeye?" Lisa asked, then added, outraged, "Who am I kidding? Of course it's the same one. How many Hawkeyes are there? And that explains why he didn't want to come here. He was afraid he'd be found out." "I can't believe him! The nerve! I'm so angry, I could....could...." "Get revenge?" Lisa asked, smiling at the thought. "Yeah. Yeah! If anybody deserves it, he does for what he's done." "I have an idea, but we'll have to wait a while to put it into action. In the meantime, we'll have to lead him on just like he's been leading us." Then Lisa laid out her plan, with Sarah agreeing wholeheartedly. Sarah left the Officer's Club before Hawkeye could spot her, not wanting to mess up the plan. Hawkeye returned a moment later and sat down. He saw the satisfied smile on Lisa's face and asked, "What are you smiling about?" "Nothing," Lisa answered him and smiled wider. ***Friday night*** Sarah, being the new nurse, had not yet completed Step 1, as Lisa had had plenty of time to do before she found out Hawkeye was such a louse. To get the ball rolling, Sarah had asked, very coyly, if they could have their date in the Swamp. Hawkeye had of course eagerly said yes, and here they were, drinking from the Still. Hawkeye’s drink wasn’t exactly the same as Sarah’s, although he didn’t know it. She had snuck into the Supply Tent and stolen a couple of sleeping pills, which she had ground up into a fine powder. When Hawkeye wasn’t looking, she had added some of the powder to his gin. He was already a little droopy-eyed, but to be safe, she added the rest to his third glass of what had affectionately been dubbed "rat poison." Pretty soon, his head was lolling to one side and his words were becoming slurred with exhaustion. "I..want to go to bed. Would you like to join me?" Although he was tired, he was still as incorrigible as ever. "Sure," Sarah answered, noting happily that this fit right in with her plan. ***The Next Morning, Around Five*** Hawkeye opened his eyes, and immediately shut them again. They were so dry and itchy, he felt as if he had been sleeping for days. He rolled over to grab his bathrobe (‘A cold shower is just what I need,’ he thought) when he noticed another form beside him. He leaned over and saw Sarah lying there, asleep. ‘I don’t remember her being in bed with me,’ he thought. ‘I must have drunk a lot more than I thought.’ As he headed outside, he decided to wake her first. "Sarah, wake up. It’s morning." "Hmmm?" she sighed contentedly, then slowly opened her eyes. "Morning, already?" "I’m afraid so," he replied. "Look, Hawk, I know I’m not much for flattery, but wow! Last night was incredible. I’ve never seen you so free, so….uninhibited. We’ve definitely got to do that again soon." She pulled back the bed sheets and pulled on her fatigues, which were lying unceremoniously in a heap on the floor. "See you later, Hawk." She blew him a kiss and walked out the door, skipping as she went. When she made it to the nurses’ shower, she hurried inside and sat on the floor. She was shaking with laughter. ‘I can’t believe he actually thought we….And that he was egotistical enough to believe what I said!’ Replaying the conversation in her mind, she burst into bouts of laughter again. Lisa walked into the shower a few minutes later and saw Sarah apparently having a hard time catching her breath. "I assume it worked?" she asked her, which only served to make Sarah laugh again. When she had finally slowed down enough to speak, she recounted the whole date to her, ending with her final conversation with him and her skipping exit. After that, Lisa was the one who needed help off the floor. ***Three Weeks Later*** Sarah and Lisa had been biding their time and were now ready to get their sweet revenge against Hawkeye. Sarah had a date with him tonight and she was looking forward to it. It was her chance to become an actress for the night. When Hawkeye met her at her tent door, she pasted a worried look on her face and said (managing to make herself sound reluctant), "I have to talk to you." 'Not a relationship talk, please,' he thought to himself, but instead replied, "Can we talk later? Right now, I just want to have a good time with you." "Okay, Hawk." She seemed hesitant, but he did not think much of it. They started to kiss, and just when things began to get hot and heavy, she pushed him away. "No, Hawkeye. I can't. I really need to talk to you." She hoped she sounded nervous enough. "What's the matter? I'm sure it's nothing Dr. Hawkeye and his Magical Fingers can't cure." He tried to kiss her again, but she turned her head. "I'm serious." She looked him square in the eye, then turned her gaze toward her hands, which she kept clasping together. "There's no easy way to say this, so I guess I should just say it. I'm....oh, boy....I'm pregnant." Hawkeye's face fell at her "admission." Pregnant? How could she.....With who.....When.....How long? All these questions rolled around in the chaotic whirlpool that was his mind; they struggled over and through each other to reach his mouth, but all he managed was a "Wh....?" "Hawkeye, I'm pregnant, and it's yours. This is our child." She placed her hand on her stomach, then reached for his. He pulled away in shock. It couldn't be! There was no way.... "Are you sure it's mine?" She growled at him in anger. "Sure? Am I sure? Of course I’m sure! I wouldn’t have told you if I wasn’t!" Hawkeye, mouth still hanging agape, managed to strangle out, "I….I..I’ve got to go." He got up and walked out, so paralyzed that he was totally unaware of his surroundings. Meanwhile, in her tent, Sarah sighed in relief. She’d done it. She’d managed to pull it off. She smiled. ‘That was definitely worth an Oscar,’ she thought. ***The Next Night*** "Hawkeye? We need to talk." He looked up in surprise, eyes wide. "I've heard that once already..." he mumbled under his breath. "What?" she asked, feigning innocence. "Nothing, nothing. What is it?" "Umm, Captain Pierce, it looks like you're going to be Daddy Pierce." "What?!" he asked, even more blown away than he had been by Sarah's revelation. "I'm pregnant, and you're the lucky dad," she added. This time, Hawkeye fainted. ***About Ten Minutes Later*** BJ had walked back to the Swamp earlier because he'd forgotten his shampoo and had found Hawk sprawled on his bed, unconscious. After he came to, he seemed in a daze. BJ was trying to figure out what happened. "Are you dizzy? Did you hit your head?" Hawkeye seemed to snap out of it and shook his head. "No, no." "What happened, then?" "Well, ummm, I got some surprising news. Again." "What?" Hawkeye looked up at his best friend in a combination of fear, shock, and surprise. "I'm going to be a father. Twice over." "Hawkeye, are you kidding me?" BJ asked, hurt. He hadn't thought that his friend could joke about something so precious. "No, I'm not. Beej, I'm in trouble. Two different nurses are going to give birth to my children, and I'm not ready. I wasn't expecting this...." "I guess congratulations are in order, even if you don't want to hear it." "Believe me, I wish congratulations weren’t in order. Of course I’ve always wanted to be a father, but not like this. This isn’t how I imagined it. I always thought I’d have a beautiful wife and we would have children after a couple years----you know, when the honeymoon had ended." He smiled, trying to lighten his own mood as well as showing BJ that he wasn’t completely distraught over it. "I know this has got to be hard, Hawk. I have a kid at home that I'm missing out on seeing grow up. But at least she's safe and I was ready for Peg to become pregnant. You weren't prepared, and you have not only one child coming, but two. And what's more, you're in a war zone in Korea. But if there's anything I can do for you, buddy, just say the word." "Thanks, Beej. You just have this way of stating problems that makes them seem so...so...obvious," Hawkeye said sarcastically and rolled over to face the tent wall. "How am I going to get out of this?" he added underneath his breath. "It's not about getting out of it," BJ replied, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Those are your children, whether you want them to be or not. Since you're their father, you have to be there for them. And their mothers." Deep down, Hawkeye knew it, and he knew that's exactly what he would end up doing. He was too good a person to abandon them, but he felt better pretending there was an easy solution if he searched hard enough. He needed to be alone with his thoughts right now. "If you think of any helpful solutions, let me know. Otherwise, back off." BJ turned around and walked out, head down. His best friend had just had the shock of his life, twice, and BJ wanted to help desperately. But what could he do? What was Hawkeye going to do? Hawkeye's thoughts were running along the same lines. What was he going to do? If only one of the nurses had been pregnant, he would do the right thing and marry her. But both of them were, and he couldn't very well marry two people. Then a thought struck him and his stomach dropped even farther. How would he tell his dad? He couldn't stand the thought of disappointing him. After all, it had only been he and his father since he was ten years old, and now suddenly, in the blink of an eye, there were two babies and two women to add to the mix. Momentary carnal pleasures had changed his life forever. ***Meanwhile, in the Supply Tent*** Lisa and Sarah were having a secret meeting in the Supply Tent. "When should we tell him?" Sarah asked, turning to Lisa, who had come up with the plan in the first place. "Not yet. We should milk this for all it's worth," Lisa answered. "If I know Hawkeye, pretty soon he'll decide that he needs to write his father to inform him of the new 'situation.' We can wait in Radar's office, under some pretense, and steal it out of the outgoing mail bag. Then we can wait a couple weeks while he waits in anguish for the reply. That's when we'll tell him." Lisa had what could almost be called a vicious sneer on her face. She was enjoying this. Forget about revenge being a dish best served cold; it was best served piping hot, reheated over and over. Sarah voiced her concern. "I'm just afraid Major Houlihan'll get wind of this and then we'll be in real trouble." "Don't worry about it. Who would tell her?" Lisa replied. ***At Margaret Houlihan's Tent*** Hawkeye nervously rapped his knuckles on the Major's tent, biting the fingernails on his other hand. He'd never been one to bite his nails before, but he'd apparently picked up the habit from all the stress he'd just been given. "What is it?!" Margaret demanded, sounding frazzled. "Margaret, I....Can I come in?" Hawkeye asked, suddenly self-conscious about what he was about to tell her. He didn't know who else to turn to. He'd gotten BJ's feelings loud and clear, and of course he was going to take his advice. He'd never really considered not supporting Lisa and Sarah and his children, but he just needed someone to talk to. 'And a woman's opinion could be helpful,' he thought to himself. 'This must be very difficult for them too, and I want to make it as easy for them as I can. Maybe she can help me figure out what they're feeling right now and how to help them through it.' "What do you want?" she asked, suspicious. She and Hawkeye weren't the best of friends by any means; true, they had been getting along better than usual lately, but still..... It was hard to trust anything he had to say after all of those mean-hearted pranks. "Can we talk?" When there was no immediate answer, he added, "Please?" After a moment's pause, she reluctantly replied, "Come in. But make this quick." He walked in and she pointed him toward her cot, where he sat. He crossed his legs, quickly uncrossed them, then stood up again and began pacing. "Margaret, I need some advice. Now, I know we aren't exactly chummy, but I didn't know who else to talk to. Now, please don't go crazy over what I'm about to tell you. Just listen, okay?" At her nod, he continued. "You know your nurses Sarah Brighton and Lisa Burkhead? Well, they're both pregnant. With my children. And I don't know what to do. Of course I'm going to support them and the children, but I want to be emotional support too, you know? And I, well, need advice on how to do that." Margaret was stock-still, eyes open wide. She didn't believe what she'd just been told. Two of her nurses, top-notch ones at that, were pregnant? And they hadn't even told her yet? She was outraged, she was shocked....but she put those emotions aside for a second. She was also touched that Hawkeye had asked her, of all people, to help him with a personal problem. She let this feeling guide her answer. "Just be there. That's all that I can say. Just be there. Don't hang over their shoulders all of the time, though. You don't want to be a nuisance. Ask how they are, if there's anything that you can do for them, but if they don't want it, back off. But stay close enough that when they need it they can turn to you." "Anything I can say? Any words of comfort?" "Whatever comes to you. If you have something rehearsed, it'll be a lot worse than nothing at all. And Hawkeye, I just want to tell you congratulations and that I'll be here if you need me." "Thanks, Margaret. That means a lot to me," he said, full of gratitude. Who knew that under those fatigues there was a real, feeling person? Hawkeye looked back at her once more in surprise, then walked out the door. ***Meanwhile, Back in Margaret's Tent*** Margaret stood up the moment the door to her tent had slammed shut. She looked out the screen that served as a window in the door and watched Hawkeye's retreating form head toward the Officer's Club. 'To drown his problems, no doubt,' she thought to herself. 'I can't blame him, though. I'd probably do the exact same thing if I were him.' She began pacing nervously. Of course, she was fond of Hawkeye, in a way, even if she didn't allow herself to show it. There was "Major Houlihan," the cool, no-nonsense exterior she put up. The Army was her job, after all, and she had to act professional. Even though she didn't enjoy this side of herself, she felt it necessary. Plus, it was a lot easier letting that side take over---going into autopilot was a heck of a lot easier than spiraling and spinning with her emotions. However, she didn't let the "Margaret" side out nearly often enough. In fact, that side sometimes seemed to her like it had withered away and died, until she went to bed alone each night. Then she would dream and allow "Margaret" out for a little fun. She thought no one even knew she had a side other than strict "Major Houlihan," but somehow Hawkeye had, and had even appealed to that side for advice. It was making her wonder again whether she was really showing her true self. Margaret had actually enjoyed the fact that someone had really and truly wanted to talk to her; people usually talked to her in a nursing capacity or they didn't want to talk at all, but rather use her for her body. Thinking about this, she was too distracted to really get mad at the two nurses who would now have to leave. They were great, but they could be replaced. What irritated her more was the fact that they hadn't felt compelled to speak to her like Hawkeye had. She was their head nurse, after all! But there was no time to dwell on it. She suddenly had a thought and her stomach sank so fast that her head was spinning. 'If this could happen to not just one, but two, nurses at this unit at the same time, it could just as easily happen to me.' She went out the door, legs wobbling. 'Frank. I need to talk to Frank,' she thought. ***In the Officer's Club*** Hawkeye walked into the Officer's Club, his eyes searching for Sarah or Lisa. He found them, surprisingly, sitting together. 'Sarah must not know that Lisa's pregnant with my child, and Lisa must not know that Sarah's expecting a child fathered by me too, otherwise they wouldn't be so friendly toward each other. I've got to diffuse this situation before it gets ugly.' He walked over and asked Sarah to come with him, on the pretense of needing her help in Post-Op, when he noticed something that outraged him. "Alcohol? You're drinking alcohol?" Looking over at Lisa's glass, he noticed that it too was a martini glass and added, "You too?" He balled his fists, angry that the two of them would endanger their childrens' lives. "You're nurses. I don't have to remind you of the risks of drinking alcohol while pregnant. I would've expected you to be more caring. Both of you." Realizing that he had revealed the fact that he knew both women were pregnant (therefore indicting himself in the other woman's pregnancy), he hastily covered up. "News travels fast, you know." Satisfied that each would think he was talking about the other, he took Sarah by the arm and led her outside. Just in case Lisa was still suspicious about what he said they headed toward Post-Op, but when they reached it they instead went behind it. "How dare you?! How....you know, I was going to go in there and ask if you needed my help or even wanted it, but now...now I see you don't even care!" With that, he stalked off. "Force of habit?" she said to his back as he walked away. ***Meanwhile, in the Swamp*** Margaret burst into the Swamp without knocking. She needed to talk to Frank, and quickly. "Major Houlihan, what can I do for you?" BJ asked, looking up from his latest letter from Peg. "Major," Frank nodded, acknowledging her presence. He was pretending to be completely professional and unaffected by her entry, but wasn't doing a very good job. Suddenly, his boots seemed to be of great interest to him as he stared intently at them. "If you would excuse me, Captain, I must speak with the Major immediately," Margaret said curtly, turning to look at BJ. "Yes, ma'am, Major, ma'am," BJ replied sarcastically and saluted, adding a wave of his fingers at the end. He walked out and toward the Officer's Club, then doubled back to listen in on their conversation. "Frank, I really need to talk to you," Margaret started, then stopped and giggled. "Frank....." Frank stopped nibbling on her ear and instead sniffed her hair. "I love the way you have your hair today, Margaret. It's very...blonde. Blonder than yesterday." "It's just the light in here," she assured him, running her fingers through her hair. She smiled, then realized that she had a different reason for coming in here. "Frank! Stop it!" "What?" Frank asked. "But I've been waiting all day, Ma-a-argaret!" "Frank, this is serious!" "More serious than you and me?" After a moment's pause, he asked, "Is it my wife?" "Frank!" Margaret exclaimed, outraged. "I told you to never say that word in front of me!" "Sorry, Margaret. You smell good tonight. Let me smell you, Margaret. Please?" "Frank, this is important! Two of my nurses are pregnant and it got me thinking. What if this happens to me? What if it already has? I can't risk that. I'd have to resign my commission, and I can't do that. It's all I have. So we can't have...." "Discussions?" "Yes, 'discussions,' anymore." "Please, anything but that, Margaret! I can't live without you!" Frank whined. He began to kiss her neck over and over. "Frank, stop it! You know what kissing leads to!" "But..." "No buts, Frank. Why don't we talk?" "About what?" "Anything you want to." "I don't have anything to talk with you about." "Nothing? Nothing at all?" Margaret demanded angrily. "You don't have a single thing to talk to me about?" "Well...." Frank groped around for a subject, anything to keep her from getting mad at him. "Nice war we're having, isn't it?" "Nice war?! Is that all you can think of? Nice war? Oh, Fra-a-nk!" Margaret stormed out of the Swamp, slamming the door behind her. She stomped to her tent and slammed that door as well. BJ laughed and quietly made his way to the door. "What's the matter, Frank?" Frank jumped. "None of your beeswax, Mr. Nosey!" BJ laughed again, then went back to reading his letter from Peg for the fiftieth time. ***The Next Day*** Hawkeye, searching for either Lisa or Sarah, had wandered over to the Officer's Club. He saw Sarah sitting at the bar and immediately went straight over to her. Sarah looked up, saw him, and held up her glass. "Water, promise." After the little fiasco in the Officer's Club the night before, both Sarah and Lisa had agreed on two things: one, to only drink water out in public in case Hawkeye came upon them, and two, to not be seen together publicly. The plan was going great, and they didn't need it ruined. Hawkeye was obviously very nervous and uncomfortable about something, so she asked, "Is there something you wanted?" "Umm, yeah..." he answered. "Listen, I'm sorry for what I said last night. I'm sure you didn't do it on purpose. I mean, I know this has got to be hard for you, and I'm wondering if there is anything I could do for you, anything you want or need? I just want to be there for you in any way I can." He looked at her and noticed she had the strangest look on her face. Before he could ask her about it, she seemed to snap out of it and answered, "That's very sweet, Hawk. But there's really nothing you can do. I do appreciate you being there for me, though." "Well, it's the least I could do," he replied. Then he looked down at her stomach and asked, very quietly and gently, "May I, you know..." She smiled and nodded. "Sure." He lightly placed his hand on her stomach and smiled. "My baby. Wow," he whispered in awe. After a couple of seconds, he added, "Bye, little baby. Bye, Sarah." He left, looking better than he had the past few days. As soon as he left, Sarah got up to find Lisa. She needed to talk. ***A Few Minutes Later*** Sarah and Lisa were in the Supply Tent. After her encounter with Hawkeye, Sarah felt she needed to talk to Lisa. "Lisa, I'm having second thoughts. I mean, Hawkeye just came into the Officer's Club, all sweet and everything. He even put his hand on my stomach! I don't think I can keep torturing him like this. I think he's really starting to accept the idea of having children. It's one thing to make him squirm for a little while, but totally another to break his heart." "Break his heart? What, like he did ours?" Here Lisa gave a cruel little laugh. "I just don't think it's been long enough. I mean, he still hasn't sent that letter to his father. We should just stick to the plan. It shouldn't be too much longer anyway. You know how he feels about his father. He feels an obligation to tell him, I know it." Sarah sighed. "Yeah, but there's a thin line between teaching someone a lesson and being excessively cruel. I think we're treading that line pretty close. But okay, I'll keep following along, despite my objections. But this better not take much longer, otherwise I'll have no choice but to tell him." "Don't worry," Lisa assured her, "it won't. It's going like clockwork, and there shouldn't be anything else to get in our way." Sarah didn't quite look convinced, but she just shrugged and left to go to her tent. ***Meanwhile, in the Compound*** After her little spat with Frank earlier, and after a few moments of raging in her tent, Margaret had gone out in search of the two nurses. After all, they would be leaving soon, and she wanted to help them on their way. Frank had treated her worries cruelly, and she didn't want them to be as disappointed as she had been. So she had decided to have their discharge papers ready, only requiring their signatures. She was starting to give up on finding them tonight when she saw Sarah step out of the Supply Tent. "Sarah! I think we need to talk," Margaret told her as she approached. "Okay. What is it, Major?" Sarah asked, the confusion evident on her face. "First off, I'd like to say that I'm not angry, although I have every right to be. Secondly, I'd like to say congratulations." She smiled and put an arm around Sarah's shoulders. "I just wish you had come and told me about your pregnancy yourself. I'd hate to think that my own nurses feel like they can't approach me with problems, especially when those problems affect everyone else in camp." They stopped, and Margaret turned to look her in the eye. "Now, I know this must be hard for you; I can only imagine what it feels like. So, I've decided to make things easy for you." She held the sheaf of papers she was clutching up to eye level, facing Sarah, so that she could clearly see what they were. "I've filled it all out for you---all it needs is your signature. It will probably still take six weeks, but this way you don't have to worry about that aspect of it. Here." She handed Sarah a pen that had been stuck behind her ear. "Just sign right here and everything will be taken care of." Sarah took the pen from Margaret purely instinctually; when someone hands you something, you take it. However, she held the pen over the paper, hovering. The ink slowly dripped out and splattered on the paper. "I can't, Major. I just can't!" She ran, panicked, back into the Supply Tent and bolted the door. "Lisa, Major Houlihan knows! She just told me to sign my discharge papers! What are we going to do?!" "I don't know...I didn't think anyone would tell her...who did tell her, by the way?" "I have no idea! Hawkeye is the only person I told." Sarah's eyes narrowed as a thought came to her. "Did you tell anyone else?" "Of course not! This was my idea! Why would I ruin it?" Lisa was yelling now, angry that her most carefully-laid plan had been ruined. "Well, if you didn't tell Major Houlihan, and I didn't tell her, Hawkeye must have....you think?" Sarah raised her eyebrows questioningly. "I don't know, but we've got to do something! I mean, this has gotten out of hand. Now we could be discharged from the Army! Not that I wouldn't want to go home or anything, but once they found out we aren't really pregnant, we'll have to go to a work camp or something! I'd rather stay here than go to a work camp." "So would I!" Sarah agreed, adopting the look of a deer caught in the headlights, trapped and not knowing what to do. "We have no choice. We have to tell everyone that we're not really pregnant." "I know, I know! But how?" Lisa, for the first time since they had implemented the plan, looked....well, like she regretted it all. "Well, I guess we both have to go to Hawkeye together and tell him the truth." "Now's as good a time as ever, especially with Major Houlihan," Sarah suggested, and at Lisa's nod they both headed out of the Supply Tent and toward the Swamp. Major Houlihan, who had been waiting for Sarah outside the Supply Tent, walked up to the both of them. "What was that all about? I was only trying to help you, you know," Margaret demanded. "Why don't you come with us to the Swamp and we'll explain it all there?" replied Lisa. Margaret looked confused, but she followed, hands on hips. Hawkeye looked up from his martini glass in surprise. "What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?" he attempted to joke. The tent was practically bursting at the seams with tension. No matter how much he tried to deny it to himself, he was still uncomfortable around Sarah and Lisa. "What can I do for you ladies?" "Listen," Lisa answered bluntly. TO BE CONTINUED... |
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