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| This Week MTGS Introduce a legend from our childhood, ( not that we had very good ones!) Yes he's here now fresh from the Premier of 'Lord Off of the Rings'...( The movie where he starred as one of the dwarf things wi ' ring) ...Mr Paul Daniels. MTGS: Hello Paul, it's so good of you to pop in. Paul: OooooooooooHh Ta... and thanks for having meeeeeeeeeeeeeee! MTGS: So-- first question Paul......Where is Debbie??? Paul: Shis 'art side eatin' a pasty from Greggs...why? Mtgs: We just wanted to say hello. Paul: Tha din't! Tha wanted ter fuck 'er like everyone else duz din't tha? MTGS: Certainly not but still we can't help but wonder why she's married to you. Paul: I may be a little bloowerk wi' a rugby ball shaped eayerd burr av gorr a big toowil tha norz! MTGS: So Paul care to show us a card trick? Paul: Aye if tha likes........................................ We went down to the local cash machine with his Visa Card. He showed us that he didn't have any money in the bank because he doesn't get work anymore, but we didnt think it was much of a trick. Paul: Did tha like that? MTGS: We thought it was funny if that's what you mean. ... In fact it's the funniest thing we think you've ever done! MTGS: So Paul where is Debbie? We havent seen her yet. Paul: Tha'z just missed er! Shi wor ere pumpin mi eayerrd back up to rugby league standards. MTGS: Ok Paul so when are we going to see a new show with you back on TV? Paul: A wor on telly last neet. Dint tha see mi? MTGS: What program was that? Paul: Oss racin from Ponte...dint tha see mi? A' wor in t'crowd bettin mi last £2 on sum daft nag called "Dessert Ourkid" MTGS: No, I think we were watching something good last night. Paul: Awwwwwww orlrayt. MTGS: So Paul were is Debbie? Paul: Fuck off will tha shi's my bird not thyn!!!!!!!! MTGS: Oooh! Steady on yer daft fuckin Bing Crosby reject! Wizbit and that rabbit 'll ave thi! Paul: Now......My lovely assistant Debbie....is rather sexual. She just loves stroking kittens and my eeyerd! MTGS: Everyone knows you bum dead tigers in Mother Shipton's cave in Knairsborough ... you pallid little gent! Paul: Not a lot MTGS: We can remember that Wizbits you were on. Would you like to talk about that? Paul: Er....no. No thanks. It's not one of me better things thannorz! MTGS: Was that you in that triangle thing? The shortarsed yellow streak of piss? Paul: GET FUCKED!!!! *A lot!* MTGS: Well on that note we'll end the conversation Paul, Thanks very much. Paul: Knackers!!!!!!!! Just at that moment Paul's wife Debbie Mc Fee or summat came into the interview room, we stripped her naked and gave her a good spit roasting! We liked it"NOT A LOT"cos she's about 55. Sadly Paul could not stop us because at the same time he developed the disease 'Alien Hand Syndrome' and wanked himself into such a frenzy his head got a puncture and exploded. Our thoughts are with his loan shark. Paul: Ooooh! Betty! |
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| "Me bank account's empty! A LOT!!" |
| Ahar This-away Ahar that-away Ahar this-away my oh my! |
| "Hey! Turn that light out!! |
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| Between takes, "Wooley" & "Wiz have a cig and a drink. |
| "Wazzbits!" |