However, in reality, my experience tells me not so much.
I consider myself a generous person, and although it is appreciated by some, others use me for it. There are times that you can totally go out of your way, not because it is absolutely necessary or anything, but because it is a matter of someone you know being inconvenienced.
-Before I continue, let me make sure you realize that a good deed is not something that is 'owed' back. Those who keep tabs on favors piss me off to no end.
-I do not keep tabs.
Now, as for going out of your way for someone's simple convenience -
You call them up (day, week, month later, whatever) afterwards with a serious favor. Whether it is convenience or not, necessity or not, they would not lift a finger. Often times I believe that if I was dieing, some literally would not lift a finger to help me. Man, this shit pisses me off.
What does it take? I consider my reputation as one which those who know me also know I would not ask anything of them that I would not do for them.
What's your point, you might ask me. Why are you throwing all of this around?
Because for the most part, every day I find these principles less and less credible. Because no matter how much I try to help others, I only feel like I am taken advantage of a little more every day. Because I realize, maybe I shouldn't be so pissed at those who keep tabs on favors. Because I realize that being generous has a very great potential of getting you absolutely nowhere.
Why? Let me tell you. Money is an easy example, so I'll go with that.
Personally, I don't like money. I don't like what it inspires in people, I don't like the selfishness it brings about, and I really don't like the fact that people value it so very much.
It disgusts me when people value a piece of paper more than they do actually getting out and living. Call me a communist, but I believe that the wealth should be shared if possible.
Whatever my feelings about money, I do still understand its necessity in this shithole world we live in.
I find it necessary at this point to truly define generosity. I maintain my money example through this, for consistencies' sake. If you have shit tons of cash, way more than you even need, and decide to throw the excess around a bit, that is NOT generosity. True generosity, to me, is paying someone's way even though you know that you're going to have to scrape pennies and bust ass to make up for it. It is giving more than you really can, for you truly believe that what goes around, comes around.
Yes, you will be in a rut, but hey, those around you will help you out. They will look upon you, realize that if they were in this rut, you would help them too.
Yeah, right.
I do know those who think like this, but I believe they are a minority of the population (at least in good ol' America). A small minority. The majority will take, but when you're high and dry, in true need of help because you spent so much time making sure they were not inconvenienced, or had a good time, you're fucked. You're not getting help, buddy. The only thing you are getting is a big, fat, "No". So where did helping anyone get you? Where did true generosity get you? I'll tell you where. Somewhere where you feel like the biggest fuckin sucker in the world. Somewhere where you are now solely responsible for getting out of this rut. If you want help, you have to find it. It WILL not come to you, unless you are lucky enough to have one of these small minorities around.
Now, try and soak in everything here.
What do you do? You don't want to say 'fuck off' to those that you consider credible. But I will be damned if I am going to be taken advantage of by one more of you miserable free-riding fucks.
Maybe the answer is to take nothing from anyone and offer nothing in return. I mean, seriously, look at it like this. If you keep everything you have to yourself, excess and all, you do not have to worry about getting help later on, because you have secured yourself. To be generous opens you up, it decreases your security, and leaves you vulnerable.
I am not a fan of being vulnerable anymore. Also, people can't get pissed at you for not giving a hand, because you will never ask for one. Sounds nice, as long as you maintain this absolutely.
What do I think should be done? Good fucking question.
Show me your answers and I'll show you mine.
reference "what goes around" in your subject line. We get too much fucking junk mail.
Mentalgiants@hotmail.com