Author: Stormfreak

Rating: PG-13

A/N: Big up to twinkylady and trilogy_x, my big bad-ass beta readers. TwinkNasty even helped me with the title. Y'all are the shit. This is to those of you who pointed out that I kept subconsciously sticking Davis Cameron in really bad roles in my fics. Whoops.

BIG UP TO THE HAVEN! WHOOOOOOOOO!

Too Much of a Good Thing

by Stormfreak

"I think the medicine is kicking in."

"What makes you say that?"

"Because she looks like she's actually resting."

Logan glanced over at Ororo, whose eyes were drooping fast. "Heh. Doctors say once it kicks in, she'll be out in ten minutes."

"She does have an unusual look of glee on her face." Rogue laughed as she poked Ororo's shoulder. "Look at her. Our little golden girl is drooling like a baby. She's so cute when she drools. Like a sedated Halle Berry."

"You...kiss my Egyptian ass." Rogue and Wolverine snickered loudly as Storm's normally regal accent pushed out foul words with a thick tongue. Storm's hand rose to slap Rogue's arm, but it only rose about an inch before she dropped it back to her side. "Halle...Halle Berry ain't got shit on me. I am...the goddess of...the elements. I...am...Logan, who am I?"

"Yer my angel, that's who ya are." Logan tried to hold his laughter, and Rogue's hands were gripping her mouth tightly as her shoulders heaved.

"Ah'd give my left arm fer a camera or a recorder right now," Rogue whispered to Wolverine."

"Quiet! She'd kill you if you did a thing like that. How do you feel, darlin'?" Logan asked quickly, taking Ororo's hand in his. He brought her fingers to his lips, kissing them tenderly. A modest diamond ring sparkled in the light, casting its rays on the sterile hospital walls.

"I'm sleepy." Ororo sounded astonished at her proclamation. "You're not sleepy, Logan? I am so, so sleepy. The walls are spinnnnnning..."

"That's normal, babe. When they give ya anesthesia, you get sleepy. Now if you weren't getting' sleepy, I'd be nervous."

"I'm cold. Why am I so cold?"

"I don't know why you're cold. Hang on, I'll go and get you a blanket."

"No! No, no...I'm not that cold. Don't leave me, Logan. Please." Despite the heavy sedatives, Ororo's hand shot out and grabbed Logan's wrist, squeezing rather tightly for a woman that was supposed be prepped for surgery.

Logan knelt down by Ororo's side. With one hand, he smoothed down flyaway strands of her brilliant platinum locks. "You scared, darlin'?" he asked in a tender voice that he only used for her, a voice that no one else ever heard. He knew she was scared. He could smell her fear, and that pained Logan a bit. He wanted to take that fear away. "Why are you scared?" he asked when Ororo nodded hesitantly, a quick, slow bob of her head so that Rogue wouldn't see her. "You heard Chuck - this is the best hospital for a mammaplasty. The head surgeon is a good friend of Hank's. And when you wake up, you'll get to see my ugly mug first thing." Logan crossed his eyes and stuck out his tongue.

"But I don't want a breast reduction!" Ororo whined. "I changed my mind ...is it too late to back out? Can't you make them stop, Logan?" she asked, her voice small and trembling. "You can make them stop, can't you baby? I don't want them cutting me open...don't let them hurt me..."

"Ororo...no. Not again." Logan spoke slowly, measuring the tone in his voice for sharpness. "We went over this. We agreed that having a mammaplasty is the best thing fer your body. Lady, your tits could solve world hunger and it's murder on your back. You have too much of a good thing, an' yer gonna continue to have the back aches from hell."

"But you said that they're your favorite playthings! You said I could feed Somalia! You said if I had a baby, you'd never let him breast-feed because you'd have to make him sleep on the lawn!"

Logan squeezed his eyes shut as heat crept up his cheeks. "Not one word," he warned Rogue, who was fighting back laughter tears. Without warning, Rogue stood up and half ran out of the operating room, but her hysterical laughter could be heard down the hall. Ororo seemed to be too sedated to notice. "Okay, okay, okay. I won't lie. I thought you had a fantastic rack. But I ain't tryin' ta marry yer breasts. I asked ya t'marry me because yer smart, an' yer beautiful, an'...an' yer mine, an' I won't let anyone snatch ya away from me. Logan kissed Ororo's forehead. "Besides, I'm lookin' forward to all that sponge bathin' I get ta do. Got the soap and the sponge all ready." She smiled then, and Logan nearly collapsed with relief. "Yer gonna be jus' fine, darlin'. Jus' fine."

It was ironic that Wolverine... the man who wanted to send Christmas cards to Storm's Victoria's Secret saleslad ... was the person that suggested the mammaplasty. Being one of her closest friends, Logan was the only one that noticed Ororo's constant back pain. She was always rubbing her shoulders, tilting her head as her fingers tried to relax some invisible pain away, or shifting slightly with her hands gripping her lower back.

One of Logan's favorite pastimes was taking an always-full glass bottle of warm sandalwood oil and giving Ororo deep tissues massages. Logan couldn't remember when he started touching Ororo so intimately ... his mind said Australia but his head said earlier than that, even. But after they finished particularly hard missions, and later, after he trained her in hand-to-hand, and years later, after they made love, Logan always finished with his oiled fingers taking the tension from Ororo's back.

"Baby, I gotta ask you something...well...a lil' personal," he'd said one night, watching his lover grimace in pain as his hands glided across her taut back muscles.

"Yes, love?" Ororo's sky-blue eyes met Logan's, her eyebrows knitted. "Is something wrong?"

"No' everything's great. I was just wantin' ta know...ah, uh... how big is yer chest?"

"By the goddess, Logan!" Ororo had laughed then. "Next thing you know, you'll be asking me how much I weigh."

"I already know how much you weigh." Logan stuck his tongue out at Ororo's indignant expression. "An' I'm not trying ta be funny. Don't you get a bit tired of lugging those things around?"

"I supposed I have gotten used to them. When I was thieving with Remy, I had a sudden growth spurt and had a C cup chest at age thirteen. We had to leave Chicago for Cairo because I stole some bras from Wal-Mart and got caught." Ororo paused before speaking again. "Logan, I appreciate it deeply when you give me massages but you have done it for years. If you do longer wish to do so..."

"No! No, no, no! That ain't it!" Logan wrapped his arms around Ororo and squeezed her tightly, feeling her relax as he kissed her once, twice, three times. "I'm actually concerned, babe. I'm not tryin' ta be a perv."

"You're not tryin' to make jokes, the way you normally do?"

"Me?! Make jokes?"

"Calling me Chesty LaRue, Mr. Wolverine?"

"Well..."

"Or how about Busty St. Clair?"

"So what? You call me Dixie Normous. But no. For once, I'm not tryin' ta be funny."

Ororo sighed, burying her face in Logan's chest. "Since you must know, I'm a 38 double E," she confessed to Wolverine's pecs.

"Damn." Logan's eyebrows lifted. "Damn. It sounds great in porno films, but it's not so great in real life. Baby, I think the reason why yer back's always hurtin' is because your tits are bigger than my head. You ever think of that?"

"I have. But I do not wish to have any type of surgery. And you are no doctor..."

"I know when a woman's chest is too big for her back," Logan commented smoothly. "And I'm sure that if you asked a real doctor, he'll tell you the same."

"Well, fine. I'll do just that!" Ororo had rolled over in a huff. "You are insane. No doctor will tell me that I need a breast reduction."

But the next week, bare-breasted in a hospital gown thanks to Logan's insistence, Hank had concurred with Logan. "Logan's assumptions are actually dead on, Ororo. I think you would have significantly less back pain with a breast reduction. With a reduction of about three cup sizes, you will still have more chest than most women."

Tears formed in Ororo's eyes, lying in the stretcher. "It sounds so vain, but...I've always had my breasts, you know?" Logan wiped a tear from Ororo's cheek. "Jean had her brilliant smile and gorgeous red hair, and Rogue had her wonderful spunk and perfect behind. But I...I had this incredible chest. I had what they didn't have. They were jealous of something that I had. I was the best looking in a bikini...or nothing at all. And now..."

"You'll still beat 'em all out in every T-shirt contest I ever host. And you have one other thing that they don't have," Logan reminded Ororo.

"Oh, really?" Ororo yawned widely. "What's that?"

"Me." Logan grinned.

"What's so great about that?" Rogue asked from the soda machine. "Mah man can burp mah name, too."

"Rogue, don't you have somewhere else ta be?" Logan snapped.

Rogue shook her head, grinning widely. "Nope. You drove me here. I can watch this sap show all afternoon."

"Isn't she special?" Ororo muttered.

"She's your bridesmaid. An' speakin' of which...can't wait to see you in that pretty white dress in a few months."

"Mmm...my dress, my dress, my dress! Logan!" Ororo tried to sit up and failed. "Logan, my dress! What will I....."

"We'll get it altered, babe. Don't you worry about it. Of course," Logan threw in, "if you would just follow my advice of a nude wedding..."

"Two words, Logan," Rogue interjected. "Hell and naw. No one wants to see yer hairy ass ...all that back hair keeping ya warm in the wintertime."

"You know what? If I were Gambit, I'd Krazy-Glue yer lips..."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah?" Logan turned around to see a tall, blue-eyed young man standing before him. Rogue began to smile wantonly, and Logan frowned, suddenly feeling conscious about his hair.

"I'm Dr. Davis Cameron. It's time to take Miss Munroe to the operating room."

For a second, Wolverine felt his heart stop, and he turned to face Rogue, a helpless, panicked in his eyes. He couldn't have been any older than nineteen was Logan's reasoning. Boy looks like a surfer bum, not a doctor!

Rogue nodded to Wolverine, a soft smile reaching her warm green eyes but stopping short of her face. Time to let go of her hand, Logan thought. " I just want to tell you personally that if you fuck this up, kid, they'll never find the pieces to yer body."

"Way ta go, Logan." Rogue rolled her eyes. "Scare the shit outta the surgeon before he cuts open your wife-to-be."

"Mr. Logan, your fiancée is in the safest of hands, and you've said nothing to me that I haven't heard a thousand times," Dr. Cameron said smoothly. "I graduated at the top of my medical school back in Australia."

"Australia?"

"Stop, Logan." Rogue rolled her eyes and leaned over to kiss Ororo's cheek. "Storm, I just wanna tell ya that even after this surgery, your tits are still gonna be bigger than mine, you lucky bitch," Rogue whispered in Ororo's ear.

Ororo smiled. "Where's Logan?" she asked, too tired to even form her lips to make words.

"He's right over here, threatening the surgeon." Rogue pushed Logan to Ororo's direction.

Ororo took a deep breath before exhaling her words. "This...this is it..."

"Darlin, are you gonna be okay?"

Ororo nodded, a gentle smile on her lips. I love you. Ororo was mouthing the words now, totally devoid of her voice. With that, Dr. Cameron nodded faintly and wheeled the gurney down the hall.

Logan stretched his arm out, touching Ororo's fingers until the moment she was out of her reach. A strangely empty feeling washed over him, standing in the middle of the waiting room in his dingy jeans and leather jacket and riding boots. Even doped up, people were craning their necks to see the lady on the stretcher, and she didn't look like her heart belonged to Logan; that he was the man she was supposed to marry. I look like the bummy brother-in-law that dropped her off for cigarette and gas money...

"They're wheeling her to surgery, not to death." Rogue wrapped her arms around Logan's midsection, placing her cheek on the nape of Logan's neck. "She'll be okay, Logan. She's gonna be okay."

"I know, I just ...She's losin' such a big part of her ... no pun intended. Maybe I did make a big deal about her breasts while we were dating."

"Logan, we all made a big deal about 'Ro's breasts." Rogue plopped in a waiting room chair, shifting uncomfortably. "Let's face it. Girl's tits were huge."

"I know. Oh, how I know." A wide smile came across Wolverine's face, and Rogue swatted him with a magazine. "But I'm sayin! I don't care if she wants to get 'em shrunk, or in this case, needs to keep 'em shrunk. Or at least, I tried to say that..." Logan's gaze went back toward the swinging double doors. "God, I didn't even tell her that I love her."

"She knows, Logan." Rogue smiled at Wolverine ... sadly, but it was there nonetheless. "Trust me, she knows."

"Well, come on, Mississippi." Logan stood up, ignoring the tightening in the back of his throat. "Let me drive you home."

"No, no...I wanna stay here an' wait until they're done with Stormy."

Logan gave a small smile. "Cajun got ya callin' 'er 'Stormy' now?"

"Oh, God. You know, about t'recorder thing, Ah was thinking...yer right. Storm would kill me if Ah had a tape of her t'day, actin' anythin' but regal an' perfect an'...everything that Ah'm not...I'd never want her to be mad at me for anythin'- she'd shove a lightnin' boly up mah ass and who wants that..." Rogue's hands flew to her mouth, choking back a desperate sob and failing miserably. Tears began to stream from her cheeks as her face turned deathly pale.

"Rogue!" Wolverine grabbed Rogue by her wrists. "Rogue, what t'hell is wrong with you?

"Ah know she's gonna be okay...Ah know it...Ah know nothin's gonna happen in there...she'll be okay...won't she, Logan?" Rogue's face turned upward, and Logan's heart nearly stopped when he saw all the anguish and fear Rogue had been holding back. All the jokes and smiles and easy-going behavior that...that had been for Ororo's sake. But she was under the knife now.

"Aw, hell. C'mere, gal." Rogue fell into Logan's arms, sobbing heavily. Wolverine carefully kissed her forehead, covered with thick chestnut locks. "She'll be okay...Ororo's gonna be okay." He felt beyond weird, embracing another woman this way, feeling another woman's hair against his cheek and smelling another woman's perfume. But Rogue needed the hug badly, and suddenly, so did Logan.

END

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