Old Polls
See how you reacted in the past,
bitches.
Another brilliant idea: polls. Seems
that people really love pressing little buttons and giving their gay opinion
that we don't care anything about other then that our readers are kept
amused. Well, I guess we better say something about them, otherwise they
are about as pointless as Canada.
Poll one: What's your favorite section?
Poll two: Who is your favorite Girl of TL?
Poll three: Which of these contributors aren't The Gay?
Poll four: Where were you on our First Anniversary?
Polls:
Ace Kendo:
Since 64 of the 64 votes came from a confused black man
currently living in Florida, they don't count. But, that matters little.
Space Ghost wins again! I must say that I am disturbed that 15% of our
visitors masturbate when they think about Seru's video game reviews, or
Zenxin's flash comics. . .of me, er. . . Space Ghost is amazing. I was
talking to this great man the other day, and all I could do was admire his
greatness. Captain PUNisher should be President of the Internet.
Seru40:
Since this poll was up for about 4 months, any results are fucked beyond belief. So instead of saying something like "Wow, we sure kick ass and such", I'll talk about why Anthropology is the most terrible class you could take, ever. You usually have to watch video after video about naked black men and their aspirations to either become fat or dead. I just saw a video the other day where they circumcised boys who were 10 and younger. With dull knives. My penis ached from exposure to it.
Yogurtman:
I really liked Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. Especially when Donny Osmond was Joseph. Go, go go Joseph you know what they say
Hang on now Joseph you'll make it some day
Don't give up Joseph fight till you drop
We've read the book and you come out on top I LOVE THAT SONG.
Triple Life:
Sir Mixalot is a fabulous man. I never knew exactly how to express my distaste for non-large asses until he came along. Now all I need to say is"My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hon" and the whores know exactly what I'm talking about. SCORE.
Zenxin:
People shouldn't mock tap dancing. It's pretty cool once you understand it.
Triple Life Mother Fuckin' Poll #3
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Bitches: Which of these contributors aren't The Gay?
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| Gimp Mask (0) | 0% |
| Fabio69 (0) | 0% |
| Utils (0) | 0% |
| RealmSGH (0) | 0% |
| Space Ghost (171) |  100% |
| votes 171. |
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Ace Kendo:
This wasn't much of a surprise. How could anyone else try
to compete with the manly power that is Space Ghost. He is a comic
mastermind, a spinner of wit extraordinaire. In other words, he is
not gay like that backwards kangaroo fucking Fabio, and his humor makes
sense, unlike that Bizarro-world inhabiting Utils. Space Ghost,
with a beard that rugged, there was no doubt in my mind.
Yogurtman:
This poll merely served to reaffirm what we all already knew; as Seru is so fond of saying, Space Ghost is
your genetic and intellectual superior. However, I did learn one new thing from this poll, namely that Space
Ghost is not only a humor god, but he has the power to BEND SPACE AND TIME. For example, I know for a
fact that that faggot Fabio69 voted for himself at least ten times, but somehow all his votes ended up in the
Space Ghost column. The Lord works in mysterious ways, I guess.
Seru40:
This is just fucking unreal. I can't believe how fucking sad you people are. I mean, look at those results,
they're pathetic. 100% for Space Ghost? For fucking Space Ghost? When I saw that I ran out of the house
and punched a few trees before defecating on them. We're talking Space Ghost here, I expected something
mathematically impossible like 314%. But no, a sad, pitiful 100. This is a black day for comedic
geniuses everywhere. I hate each and every one of you and consider this a personal insult. Shame.
Triple Life:
Once I sawr a blimp.
Zenxin:
I used to masturbate a lot until I discovered Jesus. Now I do it just about EVERY SECOND OF EVERYDAY. Lord, studly Jew with that long flowing hair. AND THAT BEARD. Ohhhhh shit.... *cums*
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Ace Kendo:
Okay, got three times as many votes this time than the
last. Much better. Seems SweetiePup, that
delightfully inexperienced and overly flirtatious nymphet has
moved the hearts of our viewers. Well, moved
something. Its hard to compete against a girl that makes
any .wav file you ask, be it about "place name here"
sodomizing her in various ways, or about how much she loves to
eat her fudge. I feel kinda bad about Prosthetic
Forehead's turnout. Guess our readers prefer the youngins. I know you all enjoyed masturbating heavily to their pictures as
you voted, because our viewers are pretty sick like that. Thank you for telling me to whom and when you did it to.
I
really care.
Seru40:
The future star of amatuer porn, Sweetiepup, is the winner. I can't properly express my extreme excitement, et cetera. Actually I could care less. I'll sum up my feelings like this. Sweetiepup is an exhibitionist whore, Kuririn's Nose said more then once she would like to sodomize me with a strap-on (and she didn't mean that in a negative way amazingly) and Prosthetic Forehead is a big part of the University of Fuck, now Nameless, the breeding ground of GAY. So I voted for Brandylion. It was merely a matter of elimination. So, to conclude, breasts are soft and fragrant, but I don't like having to choose a single pair from many. They should stand united, nude, perky, and wet. Fuck, nevermind.
Yogurtman:
Jesus, Seru, that was gay. Anyway, the only one of the "Triple Life Girls" (ugh) who is actually old enough for any of you fiends to legally have sex with was buried in a landslide vote. Slick work, guys. Not that she'd fuck any of you anyways. YOU'RE ALL FAGGOTS. And the fact that Girls of TL is the most popular section on our site still saddens me, every day of my life. Yeah. Anyway, I also voted for Brandylion, since she's not quite as whorish as the others. So there.
Triple Life:
I loves the white wimmin. I LOVES THE WHITE WIMMIN. And they loves to chew on my chocolate kabob. They also loves to make me sammiches.
Zenxin:
My disinterest in women keeps me from commenting on this poll. Give me a thick slice of man cock any day.
Ace Kendo
Notice the relatively low poll count. Notice that music
reviews got only 2 votes. What do you mean, music reviews? Yes, we review music.
GO READ. It seems you guys love our
Video Game Reviews. The biggest surprise here, is that comics
are as popular as Features. Interesting. A dead section is
as popular as the most updated one...
Zenxin
Okay I confess, I voted more than
once so its 54... The links section should have been a choice
as it continuously gets more hits than any other page. Maybe its
because all the link gifs that no one uses. BASTARDS.
Seru40
I was always under the impression that web polls were gay, concocted by gay people for the purposes of being gay. After this I'm glad to know that my theory is intact, and that I'm still the apogee of manliness. Also, I think I voted for videogames 12 or so times for the purpose of writing my Megaman X review. Or maybe I didn't. It's a mystery to all but myself. On a side note, I've been assaulted by my brother's cat 12 times in the last 3 days and now I need to drink a beer to get to sleep. Never do favours for relatives. Oh yes, the comics section used to be/still is massively horrible with atrocities no one should ever be witness to. I hate each and everyone of you who voted for that. Except those delightful Zenxin comics. Keep up the good work, guy.
Yogurtman
Before I even start, it must be pointed out that I am a lazy bastard. YES, I KNOW. Moving on, I see that several of you voted for the comics section, which forces me to question the collective worth of humanity. Have you all forgotten the horrors perpetrated by Ashton and Fabio? Those vile things are seared into my mind forever. They scarred my soul, and left me unable to write coherently, which is why I never update. Luckily, they were removed from the site, and now, after extensive psychotherapy, I have recovered, kicked my heroin habit, and am ready to begin updating again. No, really, I'm not kidding. DAMN YOU, STOP LAUGING.
Triple Life
I'm not surprised at all that Video Game Reviews won out. It's probably the only section with consistantly good content (because Ace rarely contributes to it). The downside to this section's popularity is when I have to tell people REPEATEDLY how to run "teh kewl gaemzz". I've recieved five e-mails about Super Punch Out!! alone asking me how to run them. DOWNLOAD ZSNES YOU SONS OF BITCHES. Now I'll probably get a dozen e-mails asking how to run that. Fuck you, man. Fuck you.
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