-You can't remember the last time you had a snow day.
-You can't remember yesterday.
-You're at risk for multiple vitamin and mineral deficiencies because your diet primarily consists of pasta, Cap'n Crunch, and Blue Juice.
-You buy a guitar even though you have no idea how to play it.
-You get waaaaaay too good at hackysack.
-You feel like taking a shower every time someone mentions ORTON.
-The only time your classes make sense is when you're high.
-The only time anything makes sense is when you're high.
-The only reason you have for going to the library is to make out in the basement.
-Once a week, you have to sit in absolute silence in a big white room on hard benches and stare out the window.
-Most of your clothing is green and white and says "George School" on it.
-The idea of spending three weeks in a third world country infested with insects carrying deadly diseases and where no one speaks English seems like a "learning experience".
-You're such a sick person you'd do anything to repeat that "learning experience" again.
-You only know three Republicans.
-You haven't locked your locker since freshman year.
-You don't remember freshman year.
-Your idea of cutting edge fashion is a sports bra, sweatpants, and flip-flops.
-You are sure you have mono every time your throat is sore.
-Most of the time, you're right.
-You start having the uncontrollable urge to scream "Corndog!", roll off the roof in a shopping cart, and then wrap yourself in duct tape.
-Your idea of fun always seems to involve duct tape.
-You know what "condoning" is and you've gotten punished for it.
-There is a year's supply of Ramen noodles in your locker/dorm room.
-You can curse in six different languages.
-You were once a victim of that mysterious, highly contagious disease known as "Day Student Flu" that strikes suddenly and rapidly on national holidays such as MLK Day and Memorial Day.
-You've taken a "walk" down South Lawn after dark.
-You're on "Don't Do Stupid Shit" probation.
-You get stuck in a blizzard on the way to class.
-You quote "The Simpsons" daily.
-You can get high by walking behind the right person and inhaling deeply.
-There is underwear in your locker.
-There is old smelly hot chocolate in your locker.
-"Sleep? What is this sleep you speak of?"
-You are aware that South Lawn is not just a place where people "hang out".
-You don't have a clue what your teachers' last names are.
-You have no idea what is going on in the community other than GS...
-You are always watching BET's Top 10 because that's the only show you know.
-You're waaaaaaaaay too good at pool.
-Room inspection is just another excuse to hide your weed and throw everything under your bed or in your closet.
-You see Jaguars, Porsches, Lexus, Corvettes, and Benz regularly.
-But you don't drive one.
-You know what these two numbers are: 215-860-2121 CHINA PEARL and 215-860-0333 DOMINOS PIZZA.
-You hear of people losing money $200 at a time.
-You don't see anything wrong with undressing in public.
-Everyone you know has a criminal record...or they should...
-The entire student body can be amused for hours by the new soda machine.
-You haven't seen your family in months - and you're a day student!
-You can sleep anytime, anyplace, anywhere, and also with your eyes open.
-Developmental soccer is almost cooler than football.
-You can't go anywhere withouth tripping over someone's skateboard.
-You don't want to go to an Ivy League school (which is good, cuz if you're from GS, Ivy League schools don't want you either).
-You feel like you're living in an episode of "Jackass", "Cops", and "Dawson's Creek" all put together.
-You know what (or WHOM) EVERYONE did last summer (hehehe...).
-You have amotivational syndrome.
-Your English teacher has yelled "PIMP!" very loudly in class.
-You're more afraid of the drama teacher than the deans.
-Drama class involves imitating the teacher and hiding from him.
-One weekend's worth of homework includes writing a 50 page paper, reading a novel, and 3 pages of math problems.
-Nobody shows up to all cast rehearsals.
-Your idea of quality food involves packaged saltine crackers.
-You know the Chinese food delivery man by first name.
-You have seen Empire Records more than 30 times.
-Your friends do all of your dye jobs and body piercings.
-You learn your lines the night of the play.
-Kicking a soccer ball at a wall and then at your friends is considered entertainment.
-Marshall basement is where you spend the most time-ever.
-It's impossible to use your desk in English class.
-You have serious back problems due to your backpack.
-"Damn the man" is one of the most frequently uttered phrases.
-All your parents' money is spent at either Bettye's Place or the school store.
-You spend a lot of time trying to make bracelets out of the plastic thingies that come in soda bottle caps and getting very frusterated.
-You spend a lot of time trying to explain to your friends from public school why you are making bracelets out of the plastic thingies that come in soda bottle caps.
-You are in a Weezer/Limp Bizkit cover band that is named after some bizarre, probably sick inside joke that only you and a few of your friends kind of understand.
-You know what FEI, TCSH, SMWD, DC and MFW mean.
-Your style consists of a severe mismatch of clothes (polka dots and plaids) that make you look like a gay space clown.
-You have been on flower picking, tree climbing, and barefoot probations.
-The phrases "not kosher", "yea Walmart", "yea, feel it", and "trippy" have crept into your vocabulary.
-you stop using capital letters or YoU BeGIn to UsE tHEm InAPprOpRiaTeLY.
-You have used an aerosol can in a manner not directed on the label.
-You have an extensive flip flop collection.
-Your love life goes something like this...1) You are single and you hook up with everybody you see who doesn't make you physically ill, 2) You realize how shallow and immature you are and decide to get serious, 3) You waste a lot of time trying toget a boyfriend/girlfriend until 4) You finally do and the fun lasts for about an hour when you 5) Decide they are infringing on your personal freedom to hook up with anyone you want, 6) Return to Step 1 and repeat.
-Your roommate...1) is the most perfect person EVER (varsity athlete, gorgeous, and always dating), 2) insane, depressed, ad has an eating disorder, 3) does not talk. ever. 4) is really really smart, 5) is really really dumb, 6) is gay. very very gay and attracted to you, 7) a satanic priest/jesus freak, 8) normal, you're the insane one, 9) talks to Mr. Twinkles, the stuffed rabbit/pillow/wall/other personality.
-You tell people where you go to school and they start staring at your pupils to see if they're dilated.
-You apply for a job and you're never hired because as soon as your employers see what school you go to, they think...1) you are a drug dealer, 2) you are a slut, 3) you are overworked and mentally unstable, 4) you belong in a prison camp.
-You name trees.
-You name walls.
-You rename yourself.
-Ferris Bueller is your role model.
-"Cuz I got high" is the unofficial school hymn (not that silly hymn).
-The actual school hymn sounds like a football team fight song,
-It's not  unusual to find plastic animals stolen from the local golf course scattered around campus.
-You've witnessed a wild horse stampede at school.
-You come home from school and your parents don't recognize you.
-Your 12 year old sister has a better love life than you do.
-Drinkin wine...spodyody...drinkin wine...
-You know how to make underwear out of duct tape.
-You have french toast parties.
-You fix your clothes with safety pins (and duct tape).
-Your conversations don't make sense anymore.
-To leave campus you have to ask permission from Satan (aka Dean on Duty)
-You make bracelets out of toothbrushes.
-Chemistry labs = fun with matches time!
-The two most beautiful words in the English language are DOUBLE LUNCH.
-The word "shift" brings back terrifying memories of scalding water, plastic gloves, and combinations of food you never want to see again.
-The news that the Dollar Store has moved away sends you into a severe state of mourning.
-You "play" with condoms in sophomore health class.
-You haven't been on a field trip since your public school days.
-You finally go on a field trip to Philadelphia and you leave without seeing the Liberty Bell or Independence Hall.
-You've made homemade pepper spray at the wok bar.
-The whole school is on whereabouts.
-You have sold your soul/dignity/pride/ego to one of your friends.
-You have planned to burn George W. Bush in effigy.
-You take "make love, not war" seriously.
-The fungus on the bathroom floor no longer disgusts you.
-You wear your clothes 6-7 times in a row before washing them.
-All your white clothes are pink because you don't know how to do laundry.
-You try to stuff yourself in a locker and get stuck.
-You're having long conversations with a couch.
-You can't find your bookbag under the patches, pins, and keyrings you have attached to it.
-You think there's nothing better than buying a tube of superglue and going crazy.
-You become REALLY afraid of squirrels.
-There's something wrong if your pants don't have holes in them.
You know that it's possible to cook every food on earth in a vat of grease.
-You know that it probably won't be edible.
-You have done yoga in assembly.
-You have been hypnotized in assembly.
-You think all normal people have insomnia.
-Your school actually sponsered a workshop by some guy who wrote a poem called "I REJECT MY PENIS".
-There is nothing unusual about seeing guys in drag - at least not during cross country season.
-You've been punished for throwing snowballs in an illegal area.
-You have no idea which tree is the infamous George School tree...I mean, don't they all look kinda big and old?
-You can b.s. your way out of any situation.
-You can write a 15 page paper in one night and get a good grade on it.
-You can't remember the last time you weren't sick.
-You can't remember the last time you weren't injured.
-You carry an entire pharmacy in your bookbag.
-YOu would run across a busy highway to get a bagel.
-You would walk miles in the dark and in bad weather to get a frappucino.
-You never go anywhere without a camera because you never know what is going to happen.
-Your soccer/lacrosse/softball/baseball field is in a swamp. Literally.
-You've seen someone yell random loud obscenities and then dive behind a chair when a dean walks by.
-A dean ALWAYS walks by at the EXACT moment that you are yelling random loud obscenities.
-You find out that small people can be really loud.
-You can use the word "slut" as a verb.
-You are supposed to be writing a 100 page bio paper and the words to the song that has been stuck in your head all day miraculously end up on the paper.
-Your teacher gives you an F because evidently "If you want to destroy my sweater, whoa whoa whoa..." has nothing to do with biology.
-You have a freshman.
-You go to college fairs so you can pick up hotties.
-You sign up to be a tour guide so you can pick up hotties.
-You go to the freaking dollar store to pick up hotties!!
-Your wallet is filled with recipts from Clemen's instead of actual money.
-Underwear is a conversation piece.
-You can't remember your actual hair color.
-Dress code? What dress code??
-If you haven't gotten any in a week, you're a loser.
-There is a chicken in your math class.
-You think your math teacher is plotting against you.
-Your math teacher IS plotting against you, because when you cut your hand right before a quiz he didn't let you get a band-aid. He told you to write with your other hand and then threw a napkin at you halfway through the quiz.
-You can fail and still pass.
-A big comfy sofa totally makes your day.
-You count how many people honk or yell obscene stuff out their windows when you walk to Newtown.
-You sit in class compiling stupid lists like this instead of doing actual work.
-All the girls have PMS at the same time, and it really really sucks.
-If your school had a dress down day, everyone would come in naked.
-"Dressing up" means putting on shoes.
-You have an abnormal pain tolerance.
-You're doing less work than your public school friends, and you somehow convince them to feel sorry for you.
-You've had senioritis since freshman year.
-Right before the Revolutionary War test, someone actually asks, "Hold up, who won that war again?"
-Your history teacher is a body snatching alien who has held every job that exists.
-You do origami in math class.
-You think math class is "free reading" time when you can finally read the fourth Harry Potter book.
-Your teacher is Zoolander.
-You have watched Zoolander so much you have memorized it.
-Your drama teacher was in a movie...as a crossdresser.
-The only person who might scare you more then your drama teacher is one of those dining hall ladies.
-Your teacher sings a song about murder and promiscuous sex in assembly.
-Your teachers do an obscure folk dance in assembly which involves hopping around on one foot while kicking each other in the ass,
-Your teachers sing a Rice Krispies commercial in assembly.
-Your teachers sing an opera song only using the word "Meow" in assembly.
-The senior assembly always features a striptease.
-You've seen an interpretive dance done to a Madonna song in assembly.
-You've been chased by a tin foil covered robot waving a beer bottle while attending a school musical event.
-It doesn't matter if it's good, only if it rocks!
-As part of the yearly senior prank, the seniors hang up a big sign along the busy highway...and spell seniors wrong. (SENOIRS???)
-There is a giant paper mache giraffe on the roof covered in caution tape.
-There is a giant cardboard turkey in front of the dining hall.
-You know who "Jimmy G" is.
-A water balloon fight turns into an all-out war between the juniors and the seniors.
-You and your friends turn the elevator into the new hangout spot and spend hours in there eating Ramen, making up sex lives, and barking.
-You aren't really alive until you're soaked and covered in mud.
-Your underwear is hanging from someone's rearview mirror.
-You can find a double meaning in the word "chair".
-People wear flip flops to graduation and no one notices.
-You're less stressed out during finals than you are all year.
-Your concern for the coming school year is not whether you will pass that AP class, but whether you will be able to snag a good parking spot.
you know you go to george school when...
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