2. If you get tired, wait ten minutes, then go at it again.
3. The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.
4. You don't have to compliment the person who gave you the candy.
5. The person you're with doesn't fantasize that you're someone else.
6. 40 years from now, you'll still enjoy candy.
7. If you wear a Batman mask, no one calls you kinky.
8. It doesn't matter if the kids hear you moaning and groaning.
9. Less guilt the next morning!!!
10. If you don't get what you want....you can always go next door!
Hand out colored eggs instead of candy.
After you hand out the candy, hand the trick-or-treaters a bill.
Give away toothpicks, golf balls, nuts & bolts, etc.
Fill a briefcase with marbles, write "TOP SECRET" on it...when kids come to the door, look around suspiciously & hand them the case. Say "It's about time you got here." and shut the door.
Wait for someone to approach your door...throw it open before they can ring the bell. Yell "TRICK OR TREAT!" and hold out a goodie bag.
Get everyone who comes to your door to come inside and try and figure out what's wrong with your dishwasher.
Answer the door dressed as a giant fish. Instantly flop onto the ground, and don't move until they leave.
When you answer the door, hold out a candy bar. Throw it into the yard, and yell "CRAWL FOR IT!!!"
When you answer the door, act shocked and scared. Run into the house screaming, and don't stop until they leave.
Insist that they each do ten push-ups before they can have their candy.
Hand out menus and let the trick-or-treaters order their candy. Keep asking if anyone would like to see the wine list.
Answer the door dressed as Santa. Stare at the kids for a moment, then start flipping through a calendar.
Answer the door dressed as a dentist. Lecture everyone in sight about plaque and tooth decay.
Answer the door with chocolate smeared all over your face, and a few half-eaten candy bars in your hand. Insist that you're out of c
