| Title: My Immortal Author: Rachael Alcobia Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story. Author's Note: Post Season 2 Finale. Songfic Summary: Buffy's thoughts while fleeing Sunnydale after killing Angel. Rating: PG-13 Lyrics: My Immortal, by Evanescense ................................................................................................................................................................. ~I'm so tired of being here, Suppressed by all my childish fears, And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave, Because your presence still lingers here, And it won't leave me alone.~ 'Now Leaving Sunnydale, Come Back Soon!' That's what the sign said as the bus rolled by. Angel. My lover. My friend. My enemy. My teacher. Whistler told me, the sword wasn't enough. He was wrong. When I stuck that sword through your unsuspecting gut, a part of me wished he was right. That it would close Acathla and you would still be alive. When you looked at me, you, not Angelus, you said you didn't remember what you'd done. In that moment, your eyes looked into mine… I didn't remember either. I was consumed with relief that you were back, and scared, knowing that you would have a hard time getting over what you'd done. But I knew that whatever you felt, we'd get through it. ~These wounds won't seem to heal, This pain is just too real, There's just too much that time cannot erase, When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears, When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears, And I've held your hand through all of these years, But you still have all of me.~ You were so innocent. Completely confused as to why I held a sword in my hands. Raised high in the air, as my muscles flexed, building up a striking blow to your neck. In that instant, that ONE instant, I watched your cold, hard eyes flash gold. Suddenly, I found myself staring deeply into those chocolate brown eyes, filled with love and concern. At that precise moment, I knew. I was still cautious, but I knew. ~You used to captivate me, By your resonating light, But now I'm bound by the life you left behind, Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams, Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me.~ Then came the light. An unknown brightness swarming over your shadowy figure. That light. The bright spiral that twisted and churned behind you. That glow… just the memory of it brings such hate to my heart. So intense this hate is. Boiling inside of me from the deepest, darkest pits of my heart. If it weren't for that damned light, you'd be here. You'd be in my arms. ~These wounds won't seem to heal, This pain is just too real, There's just too much that time cannot erase.~ You looked so confused. I couldn't have done it if you knew. What was I supposed to say? "Sorry, but your dumb ass alter-ego resurrected Acathla and I have to kill you now?" No. I wanted it to be peaceful. I wanted you to know that I loved you. To feel it. So I kissed you. I'd missed your kisses. I told you to close your eyes so you wouldn't see what I was about to do to you. I pulled the sword back and struck hard and true, as to make it quick. That look you gave me. I saw confusion, pain, wonderment, but most importantly, at the last moment, I saw a flicker of understanding. I love you. I will always love you. My immortal. ~I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone, And though you're still with me, I've been alone all along.~ Buffy read another sign: ''Welcome to Los Angeles - The City of Angels' The End Send Feedback to Rachael Alcobia + Back to the Archive + |