This false religion began in Iran in the nineteenth century with a man named Mirza’ Ali Muhammad, who like all other false prophets, claimed to be divine and was here to lead the world to the ‘true’ religion.
Mirza was murdered by Ilsamic fanatics in 1850 at age 31.
On July 8, 1850 he was stood in front of 750 Armenian soldiers and shot! Somehow, when the smoke cleared from the 750 bullets, he was standing firm, unscathed. He ‘Teleported’ to his cell to speak to his disciples. (The Starship Enterprise must have taken part in this.) Well, while speaking to his disciples, he was led out once again and shot. His followers claimed that he was superhuman (a prophet). After this man, the Bab, (as he was called) died (the first and only time the bullets hit him) his successors claimed divinity and they were the ones prophesized by the Bab. This was probably news to the Bab, but like he could speak out against it now. So, from the newbies sprung out a new religion.
The Baha’I ‘religion’ takes bits and pieces of several religions and forms their own beliefs. Most of their beliefs are not Christian, even apocalyptic depending on whom you ask. Their religion must coincide with science and reason, which is led by Atheists; at least in the Media stories which focus upon them. True science coincides with Christian beliefs and claims. Also, the Bahai faith also pushes for a universal religion; theirs, and one universal language along with basically, all the world united as one government. They believe their prophet supercedes any other prophet of the past. They pick and choose from all the religions past and presents sacred texts.
The Baha’I rejects the absolute authority of the bible, Catholic Church, Trinity, Virgin Birth, Resurrection, and Second Coming of Jesus.
Fortunately for all of us, there are only 5 million followers and they are led by really no council or leader.
NEW AGE CULTS.
Several religions can be thrust into New Age Cults. Hardly new though. Most of these cults are just rehashed pagan and occult religions of old. Examples are Astrology, Witchcraft, necromancy, palm reading, Satanism, astral projection, channeling, KABBALAH, and psychics. You know those people out there who believe everything they read in a radical fictitious book, ala Democrats, are easy candidates for New Age Cults.
New Age Cults describe their God as one who is present in all creation. His energy flows through us all. In the Immortal words of a Yoga teacher…Aummmmmmmmm. Aummmmmmmm. (Make sure your arms are bent at the elbow and palms upward.)
Yoga, while great for stretching, is often taught by a New Age nut. (Don’t believe me, just go check out your teachers car and count all the bumper stickers plastered all over it.) Items used are the Ouija board, Tarot Cards, and Spellbooks.)
New Agers believe in UFO’s. Not unidentified flying objects, but ALIENS! Reminds me of the nut I saw on a day time talk show year ago. The wacko nut job was out in the woods sleeping with her neighbors. This recurred many times over. Well, her excuse: The Alien ship summoned her and all her neighbors and forced their brains to make them all have sex with each other. Her husband, I doubt, believed this excuse.
Conspiracy Theorists make up a huge following in this Religion. Which makes sense because a nutty religion does need nuts to make it run. Drugs are common with all parts of New Agers. Drugs are a necessity and these wackjobs want them legal. (Which would explain all those UFO sightings.)
So, the next time you are frustrated that your candidate lost an election, look to the nearest New Age loon and thank them for canceling out your vote.
HARE KRISHNAS
The fruits at Airports selling those stupid flowers are the one and only, Hare Krishnas. This religion was founded in the 60’s by Vishnu yogi who was born in India in 1896. He needed to travel to the one place on earth that had weak minds, wacko nut jobs, and the biggest moron population so he could find some followers. His final destination…San Freaksicko (San Francisco) California.
Low and behold, it didn’t take him long to find followers. The Hare Krishnas are public solicitors and are Vegetarians. They worship their Idols. Vishnu died in 1977. The Krishas went through several leaders battling for supremecy. The leaders were oh so worthy with raps sheets consisting of drug dealing, murder, tax evasion, other morally acceptable acts in San Francisco.
Vishnu really didn’t invent this religion, he just rehashed an old belief five hundred years prior by a man named Chaitanya, who proclaimed that one should worship the god Vishnu instead of Shiva. But, the Krishna’s now teach that Jesus Christ isn’t God’s son, he’s Vishnu’s son. Um, ok. They practice astral projection, (one’s soul leaving oneself and jumping somewhere else.) and they practice levitation. These crosslegged bunny hopping loons are hilarious to watch in action. As of today, zero, yes zero, Krisha’s have levitated. But they all have rug burn on their ass!
APOCALYPTIC CULTS
There are never any shortage of horny men out there wanting to sleep with numerous women, twist scripture, sleep with numerous women, found their own religion, and sleep with numerous women. Of course, there are always a few dumb people nearby ready to jump aboard and if necessary, hand their wives and daughters off to sleep with the Horny Cult Leader. Don’t get me wrong, the women are willing volunteers and often lead their families to the new cult.
Often times the leader claims to be Jesus, or a chosen one, and they predict the end of the world with their deciphering of the Book of Revelation. There are actually huge religions that are extremely similar to this, but they are called CULTS. I am talking about Cults founded by oversexed conmen such as Mormonism and Jehovah’s Witness.
You may have heard of some of the following Apocalyptic Cults which always, like Jehovah’s Witnesses, always falsely predict the end of the world or the second coming of Jesus Christ, such as the Branch Davidians, the TS, and the butcher of Cultists, Jim Jones.
Jim Jones had near 1,000 followers. When he was being hounded by common thinking people about his practices and false religion and his crimes, he at gunpoint, forced his 1,000 followers which included women and small children and babies, to drink Kool-Aid laced with deadly poison. He, after everyone was dead, took poison himself. You may hear of the term Kool-Aid drinker. This means anyone that believes and spews whatever someone tells them no matter how farfetched without checking the facts as truth.
David Koresh and his Branch Davidians dwelled in Waco, Texas. Good Ol David would be the first to tell you he was the Son of God. Anyone with an IQ over fifty would be the first to tell you he wasn’t. David was a genious in High School and was so smart he knew it all in his first few months of his freshman year. So he dropped out because he knew it all.
Typical of Cults, he was entitled to sex on demand from his followers. He was sleeping with 11 year old girls and married women on a regular basis. He and his followers stockpiled illegal weapons. His escapades and illegal activities drew the FBI in 1993. A shootout ensued and after a fifty day standoff, the government went in and David and his Followers torched the whole compound, killing 100 men, women and children. He killed himself with a bullet to his brain.
The TS were another group of dummies that believed, thank to another false prophet of a leader, that they would leave their bodies after being shot in the head or suffocated in plastic bags. Several places across the Earth with a few followers here, and a few followers there all killed themselves or their fellow members on the same date, the same time¾October 4th, 1994.