A Pathetic and Unfortunate Imitation of Garande

by T. Tut Tsanga; 9th January 2009

An internal coup d’etát is brewing in the legitimate MDC, so claims Gilbert Muponda’s Zimbabwe Telegraph, and entrepreneur Clive Masiyiwa is at the heart of the whole intrigue. That would be an incredibly stupid move by the conspirators, assuming Gilbert Muponda’s cyber newspaper has any semblance of credibility. The veracity of this claim is very suspect, and I put it very politely.

We have come to expect this flummery to come straight from the ZANU-PF agitprop playbook. If I want to read ZANU-PF propaganda, I would get it directly from the donkey’s mouth, the Herald, or the hole in the south-end of the northbound donkey, Talk Zimbabwe. This is the kind of material that would have Charamba and Garande rubbing their hands in glee. The mere fact that these two ultra-detractors of Morgan Tsvangirai and the MDC have not said a word about it is incontrovertible proof that the story has no scintilla of credibility. Garande is on record advocating for the removal of Morgan Tsvangirai from the MDC presidency in particular and the decapitation of the MDC leadership in general. Would this not be like manna from heaven for Itayi Garande and his political ilk?

To Gilbert and Munamato, I say please stop playing dupes. You need to verify some of these stories before you frantically rush to post silly material. This article is sold to the readership as news. I find it strange that apparently nobody made an effort to dig deeper into the story. I sense disturbing signs of lassitude in it. Did the editors contact Masiyiwa? Surely, it would not have taken much time to do something as mundane as making a phone call. Mark Twain warned about this brand of journalism; it should not be taken seriously.

The publication of the article is very inopportune and gravely disturbing. At this juncture, when people are dying of cholera, political and human rights activists facing frighteningly rampant abductions by ZANU-PF thugs apparently sanctioned by people like Comrade Didymus Mutasa, homicidal-level corruption going unchallenged, and a looming famine, I doubt the normally astute Clive Masiyiwa would be stupid enough to instigate a momentum-shifting, energy-sapping and demoralizing leadership succession struggle within the MDC. It would be down right suicidal for him to do that. Such a putsch would treasonously take focus away from what matters the most, getting long-lasting relief for the long-suffering people of Zimbabwe.

Economic and political reprieve will only come when ZANU-PF’s state-assisted roguery ends. The primacy of ending ZANU-PF tyranny once and for all cannot be overstated. Everything else must be subordinated to this patriotic goal. To do otherwise will definitely aid and abate the commission of crime by ZANU-PF against the Zimbabwean people.

The removal of Mugabe and defanging ZANU-PF must be the first and foremost goal of the opposition. This would mark the beginning of the recovery of Zimbabwe. I doubt Mr Masiyiwa would want to jeopardize that noble goal let alone give succour to Gideon Gono and Robert Mugabe as they drive Zimbabwe to the bottom of the abyss. As an aside, let me categorically state that the opposition I allude to does not include Comrade Guseni Mutambara since nobody really knows what he stands for other than an incessant quest for political self-aggrandizement.

There remains the intriguing question; why would Gilbert Muponda’s cyber newspaper put such a damaging story in a public domain? Either this story was published to garner internet traffic for the Zimbabwe Telegraph or there is an ulterior motive. We should never lose sight of the fact that Mr Muponda is, above anything else, a businessman. Publishing newspapers is ancillary to his business. He is within his rights to legitimately act in furtherance of his business. No sensible person takes umbrage with that.

However, if his sub rosa business-driven mechanizations endanger the quest for freedom of millions of our people, at home and abroad, people of good conscience ought to amicably remind him that the genesis of wickedness is when the desire for accumulating material wealth gets disjoined from remorse. Judging from his past, he does not have a particularly stellar record. Upon the announcement of his acquisition of the zimdaily.com cyber newspaper, some of the people who responded in the reader-feedback section were of the opinion he is a crook, Zimbabwe's version of American pitiless swindler Benny Madoff.

If I were into conspiracy theories I would say Muponda, a man on the INTERPOL's wanted list, is trying to curry favour with Clive Masiyiwa with the hope of successfully suing for clemency when the MDC assumes power. ZANU-PF put him on that list and it is conceivable the MDC could get him off it. It reeks of abhorrent opportunism. Perhaps Gilbert Muponda is trying to imitate Garande. Itayi Garande has been accused of that behaviour, acting as a fifth columnist for ZANU-PF for personal gain.

If that line of thinking gains traction, Gilbert’s problems with the Zimbabwean people may deepen. It is the gluttonous opportunists that have visited ruination upon our beloved country. So, if I were in Mr Gilbert Muponda’s shoes, I would be very careful when it comes to mixing Zimbabwean politics and personal business.

In my opinion, a pathetic and unfortunate imitation of Garande will not serve Muponda’s interests.