The first problem is an article. I got negative points about 3 from article problems. I did my best but I still have a lot of problems here. I don't know which places are proper to use an article. Also, I'm confused by using 'the' or 'a'. The second problem is that I'm using same words too frequently. For example, I used 'since' in one sentence two tiems. I meant to make a rhyme but it wasn't good enough to show my first purpose; Rhyme and it turned out to be a poor sentence. The third problem is confusing sentences. My sentences were too long to show clear purpose. Sentences in my essay are usually over three lines. As a result, the sentence became so messy. However, I'm happy because I was prefect in 'work cited' part.