The 12 Steps to Breaking up With Any Girl Who Whips You | |
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Step 1: Get your bitch head out of your ass and realize that she is the worst thing
that ever happened to you. Your life has become unmanagable as a result of mega hyppocrite
honor role control freak making decisions for you. Oh yeah and you aren't in love with her
you retard...if you ever say that again I'm committing you. Step 2: Stop letting yourself or gaygan control your life and instead believe that a power greater than you can restore you to sanity. That would be your friends. They can actually make decicions since they aren't "in love" with this person. Well, nevermind Nick then. Step 3: Turn your life over to god as you understand him. Since god probably doesn't give a crap about you and Megan just hand your life over to us. Hand over your stereo too. Step 4: Make a "searching" and "fearless" moral inventory of yourself. For Fred it would look like this: -I am Someone's bitch -Whenever I make a decision I change my minnd as soon as I talk to this person because I'm her bitch. -No matter how frequently she dumps me I'm still her bitch -No matter what I say I'm still her bitch -Whenever I try to think of a good reason tto stay with her my brain farts. Step 5: Admit to yourself and other people that you are the most whipped man bitch on earth--that you if this person made you eat nothing but baboon poop for a week you would because otherwise she would dump you. Step 6: Become ready to have your friends completely beat these defects out of you. |
Step 7: Humbly ask God to remove your shortcomings. No, Fred, not your penis...you
can keep that. You might actually get to use it after you break up with your girlfriend. Step 8: Make a list of all the girls you were a dick to and get prepared to let them repeatedly kick you in the groin while you apologize to them for not being thier friend because she said so. Step 9: Make amends with all these girls especially when doing so would hurt yourself. Step 10: Keep paying attention to how you are her bitch and when you start getting whipped promptly admit that your life sucks. Step 11: Stop talking to her every day. Jesus Christ if you wanna break up with her then stop calling her every day you idiot. If you need to, destroy all the phones in your house and stop going to school. Move if you have to Step 12: Do Kelly, but more importantly, carry this message to other whipped motherfuckas. What do you think I'm doing? by Sean
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