Now the dry spell wouldn't be completely over if Nick and Fred were still only in love with eachother. Fred

Well being optimistic is stupid. About a month after I left, Fred started going out with Beth. Since they were still together when I came home, I figured that Fred would have some crazy ass poon tang stories to share with me, and he would have if he was good at making shit up. It turns out that Beth is prude. Fred's stories about his wild love life included such pulse quickening tales as "we made out on Craig's futon", and "I grabbed her boobs". Since Fred was shut down, I lost all hope that Craig or Nick would get it on with anyone. But, maybe the only reason there wasn't a party in Fred's pants was because he was tied down with Beth. Maybe he could have been a player with her out of the picture. Maybe Nick or Craig was able to pick up his slack.

That was the dumbest thing I have ever typed. The only girls that Craig isn't afraid of turn out to be the ones that are involved in double-digit year relationships. Instead of calling Liz or something, Craig decided to take the more fulfiling route and just drool over Brooke from afar. Craig hasn't had a girlfriend since he went out with Lauren for a day back in 2000. He hasn't kissed a girl since making out with Mara while she was going out with Nish. So, please, if you are a girl in a long term serious relationship and you are reading this, please consider cheating on your boyfriend with Craig or something. And, if you just happen to be the right girl for Craig somehow, you need to almost literally throw yourself at him for him to notice you. Craig's dry spell is so dry that its making me thirsty.

Fred eventually broke up with Beth, not being able to stand her fat chunky ass anymore or something and split his time between pissing off Kelly and pissing off Beth. Every now and then he would have five minutes of sensitivity and make out with one of them and end up telling the rest of us about it later. For example, on New Year's Eve, he slept in the same bed as Kelly. (It was in my house but don't worry, I changed the sheets and fabreezed the mattress). We didn't think much of it until like 10 days later when he tells me that he made out with her. Apparently he was trying to have sex with her but she didn't want to or something dumb like that. Anyway, the more that Fred screws around with Kelly and Beth, the less he can mack it with other women.

Right now, the three of them are standing around with thier thumbs up thier asses. They all like the same person. Jamie. Jamie likes Fred and since Fred knows this, he has lost all interest in her. Besides, she's too nice to him anyway. Nick and Craig deny liking her, but its so obvious that Nick, the girlfriend stealer, likes her. And, since Craig only likes girls who are involved with other guys, he likes Jamie too. So, my three friends are in a big gagglefuck and it doesn't look like their dry spell is going to end any time soon.