Crash and Burn - by Bob J Montonelli


 Cold.  Darkness.  Churning, soaking, blasting, choking on the water.  On the death.  Salt in the lungs.  Miguel, where are you?  Water spalshing.  I have too…waves, thick, heavy, crashing, throw me and I crack into wood, rock--something solid, pain shoots through me.  I cannot see and the water burns my eyes.  Thick, salty, greenish-bracken water.

            Miguel, where are you!? 

            Pleading.  Tossing.  Thrown, battered, my body aching, oh, God, please…Miguel…help me…where are you?  Please, where are you?

            Waves.  Crashing.  Dragging me down.  Deep.  Deeper.  My chest contracting, I have to breathe, I have to…if I do, I die…if I don't, I die…I can't help it, the breath blasts from my lungs in a rush and in gulps water, filling my lungs, crushing my heart, burning my chest and oh, God, Miguel…Miguel, please…oh, help me…oh God…

            I'm going to die. 

            I'm dying.

            I'm…

            Oh, God, it hurts…oh, Miguel…

            It hurts!!

 

            Miguel was awakened by soft sounds beside him.  He knew it was Tulio, and was about to go back to sleep when he realised how suspiciously the sounds were like…Crying.  He's…crying? 

            "Tulio!" Miguel hissed, shaking him.  "Wake up…come on…s'just a dream…" 

            His friend woke up suddenly, sharply, bolting upright, still sobbing thickly.  He coughed and gasped like a landed fish for a few minutes, and Miguel wrapped his arms around the other man, trying to calm him. 

            "Shhh…it's all right…just a dream…"

            Tulio murmured something unintelligible between sobs, cuddling closer to his lover, his tears tingling on Miguel's bare skin.  Miguel held him tightly, rocking him as if he were a child.  Finally, Tulio's heavy sobs were reduced to occasional soft hitches, and he spoke more coherently.

            "Miguel…" his voice was a miserable, weak choke.  "Miguel…hurts…s-so much…l-lost you…" the other man turned tear-reddened blue eyes up at his partner, pleading for some gesture of confidence.

            "Shhh…it's all right, I'm here."  Slowly he lay back down, Tulio still half-curled around him, head pillowed on his chest.  Miguel smiled slightly at the tickle of Tulio's blue-black hair on his skin.  He began to run his hands up and down his lover's back, stroking gently at the soft skin and occasional scars he found there.  Tulio often had nightmares, and it was left to Miguel to calm him.  Sighing, he glanced over to where Altivo was quietly enjoying a midnight snack of the local plantlife.  Chel had run off several days earlier, leaving them lost and betrayed.  "Probably went to find some other people like her…"  Tulio had commented.  Miguel had sighed and shaken his head at that, wondering how his lover had managed to be cursed with such meandering sexualities.  Ahhh, well…he glanced down at the tousled head on his chest.  A pair of sea-blue eyes mirrored his own--not so hurt and pleading now.  Now they glinted with gentle desire, passion, and love.  Mmm…he is so beautiful…I wonder if he knows it… 


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