2000
I had two night dreams two weeks apart that stayed with me. In one, I saw an evil pointed star glowing in the mirror, a man appeared, I turned around but was suddenly pushed down. When I woke up, the shoulders where his hands touched were tingled with a strange energy which ran down the lungs in two parallel lines. Confined energy in well-defined lines. That was my last night at the Ash house. I decided not to spend another night there. Last night, in my room at Tiana's, a dry and warm night, I had a vivid dream. I was taking a shower, but couldn't feel the water or anything. A man, beautiful body, was taking a shower beside me. When I turned my back toward him, he grabbed me from behind, one arm across my chest, the other my stomach. With subtle force and maybe telepathy, he let me know that it was up to me to receive pleasure or pain. Either way I would be safe with him, in his arms. I never quite made out what the two men looked like, though I had eye contact with them. Strange, eh?
A dream, maybe associated with a past life. I saw a white woman in a cotton long dress, early American style, I think. She seemed to be in charge of a house for charity, helping the poor, with other women. She had parted hair, pleasant features, a reserved air about her. And a name associated with her, Rockefeller. Could it be me?
Mom and I had long talks. Dare I say we're making the crucial connection to rebuild our relationship? We went to the beach, lunch, shopping. I told her most of the delicate issues I'd been holding back. She took them well. If anyone listened in our conversations, he would be shocked. We are at the level of brutal honesty that would seem like sarcasm and mean-spiritedness, but actually not. Mom is slow with her walk now. Her mind is still sharp.
Spent the morning with Mom and Aunt Pauline. We went to the beach, the harbor, took photographs. My two girls! Each with her own destiny, punishments and blessings. I had a picture of my grandmother. She died young giving birth to Mom. Aunt Pauline, 5 years-old, closed her eyes. Maybe I was my grandmother who had to come back to take care of her kids in their old age. Maybe not.
thai ta