September 2004
Vo Vi Conference, Hawaii
The events that I've waited for 10 months is finally here! I've been thanking God all day long; I hope God is not too annoyed with me. I'm staying by myself in this terrific room with a gorgeous ocean view on the 21st floor. The cabin is gonna be cramped, so I allowed myself this luxury. I enjoyed watching the clouds while flying in this morning, and after a pleasant walk to the shopping center across the street, I enjoyed watching the sunset out on the balcony. There was light rain. The play of light was simply lovely. I thought of you-know-who and said a prayer for him, though it seemed a bit inappropriate missing him during the spiritually-focused Vo Vi conference. I brought along the new CDs I just got and one of my favorite books, The Gift of Acabar -- Og Mandino & Buddy Kaye. Listening to Christmas music by Celine Dion somehow worked in this atmosphere. It's soothing, calming your soul. Seeing once again the practitioners from Southern California and some familiar faces from elsewhere gather here for another cruise, I feel quite happy. It's the happiness of one who doesn't really expect a lot from these men & women, who knows and accepts the limitations of reality, yet who can still appreciate the occasions, moments, the individuals and the memories whenever possible. This is wisdom, I think. And my heart is wide open.
SUNDAY Too lazy to go out for breakfast, (and want to forget about room service), I'm having a few left-over honey-roasted sunflower seeds and my Vietnamese instant coffee. There's a Ba Le sandwich shop in Sears, but I didn't find it yesterday. At Sears, I found $20-dollar shirts made in Vietnam instead. Last week I read some articles about the poverty in Vietnam, prostitution, Chinese men buying virgins, the horror of children being abused by pedophiles, country folks pouring into the cities to work and live in desperate conditions, etc. -- I so wished that I could help my Vietnam somehow. I know poverty exists everywhere and on the scale of human suffering, Vietnam is not top on the list. Still.
Last night I slept okay, except for a couple of vivid nightmares. (Hotels always have this effect on me.) I saw the bed spinning round and felt some dark entity toying with me. As I am writing this, light rain dusts over the scene, then, a perfect rainbow appears. I've never seen one this big, in a beautiful setting too. And now, there are fragments of rainbow, far at sea, one after another but slowly, together with dark clouds. Dualities. Such is the nature of God, I think. If you love God, you have to take the whole package. (Am I blasphemous for thinking this?) Anyway, I'm enjoying the last hour before checking out, and off to the Vo Vi boat we go! I want to always remember this feeling of peace within my soul, the simple joy in recognizing everyday miracles. Thank you, God. Big love, big kiss to You.
thai ta