Context: Late in the episode. Beforehand, KRAMER had discovered that Calvin Klein ripped off his Beach Cologne idea. KRAMER wants to confront someone in the company. JERRY's CK model girlfriend, TIA, thinks she caught him picking his nose so she's off him. ELAINE's Christmas card has a photo of her on it, only it shows more than she expected, but she mailed them all before she noticed the problem.

TIA
Well--what're you doing here.

JERRY
Well, I had to talk to you--I noticed you haven't been returning my calls.

TIA
Well; I've been busy.

JERRY
Because I--I thought we had a good time the other night, an' the only explanation I can come up with is that you think that you caught me [amused and flustered, indicates a nose pick]..

TIA
[waving him off] I'd rather not talk about this--

JERRY
But I was clearly on the outer edge of the nostril.

TIA
I know what I saw. [turns toward the elevators]

JERRY
But there--but there was no piick!! I--I did not pick!! There was no piick!!

TIA
I gotta go. [walks briskly]

JERRY
No! No piick!

KRAMER
All right, now here's the scoop, Jockey. I, uh, I came in here last January to talk to one of your ffflunkies.

CK
Interesting face.

KRAMER
Yeah--And um, when I told him my idea about the beach cologne, you know he--he laughed at me.

CK
You're very lithe, aren't you: very graceful.

KRAMER
Well, yeah.

CK
Sit down; eh?

KRAMER
[ungracefully sits, misjudging the one side of this sectional couch]

CK
You're very lean, but muscular.

KRAMER
You know, I try to take care of myself, I--I watch what I eat. Ah! Just recently I cut out fructose.

CK
You're Spectacular.

KRAMER
[flattered] Oh.

ELAINE
I told you, Fred: my friend's next door neighbor took it.

FRED
[incredulous] Sooo--what happened.

ELAINE
Well, I--I--I must a missed a button, I forgot to button it.

FRED
I really don't see how you could misss a button like that.

ELAINE
Oh, you've never missed a button? [her phone rings, she pushes a button] Yeah?..

RECEPTIONIST
[on speaker] Your sister, Gail.

ELAINE
Oh, God--my nephew. [picks up receiver and hits button] Hi Gail!.. Yu--yu--Yes, Gail; I know how old he is.

CO-WORKER
[peeks head in doorway] Hey, Nip, ya need that manuscript or can I take it home?

ELAINE
Yeah, take it! Take it!--An' stop calling me "Nip"!

CO-WORKER
[takes it and flees]

ELAINE
[back on the phone] It was an accident!

Well--well--it's gotta be somewhere; look under his mattress.

WOMAN
About the focus group? I had nothing to do with the focus group. What's your point-- [sees KRAMER, prospective model; KRAMER's only wearing dress shoes, white socks, and white briefs; he's strutting his stuff]--My. He's Sexual, athletic--an' without a trace of self-consciousness!

CK
His buttocks are sublime!

MAN
Of course, his pectorals could use a little work--I suppose we could get him into the weight room--

WOMAN
[entranced] No, let's get him in the studio today. We can send these out immediately.

KRAMER
[puts hand on wall to affect a casual lean on it but the corner there is rounded; he slides and falls down--but maintains his cool throughout]

[The other people don't notice, are talking amongst themselves.]

MAN
You've done it again, CK!

JERRY
[nobly announcing] An' what if I did do it? Even though I admit to nothing and never will. What does that make me? And I'm not here just defending myself but all those Pickers out there who've been caught. [elevator arrives] Each an' every one of them, who has to suffer the shame an' humiliation because of People Like You.. [she's in elevator with others, and she clearly can't wait for the doors to shut--JERRY stays in the hall] Are we not human! If we pick do we not bleed! [elevator doors have shut and the few people in the hall are looking at him] I am not an Animal!

ELAINE
I did not bare myself deliberately, but I tell you: I wish now that I had: Because it is not me that has been exposed, but you! For I have seen the nipple on your soul!

[time: 3:26]

Last Updated: 30 April, 1997