Anger Management
Part 3
> >> > So, I came up with an idea: I called Asshole #1: "Hello.
> >> > You're an asshole!" (but I didn't hang up.)
> >> >
> >> > "Are you still there?" he asked.
> >> > "Yeah," I said.
> >> >
> >> > "Stop calling me," he screamed.
> >> >
> >> > "Make me," I said.
> >> >
> >> > "Who are you?" he asked.
> >> >
> >> > "My name is Don Hansen."
> >> >
> >> > "Yeah? Where do you live?"
> >> >
> >> > "Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house
> >> > with my black Beemer parked in front".
> >> >
> >> > He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had
> >> > better start saying your prayers.">
> >> >
> >> > I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole."
> >> >
> >> > Then I called Asshole # 2:
> >> >
> >> > "Hello?" he said.
> >> >
> >> > "Hello Asshole," I said.
> >> >
> >> > He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."
> >> >
> >> > "You'll what?" I said.
> >> >
> >> > "I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed.
> >> >
> >> > I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm
> >> > coming over right now."
> >> >
> >> > Then, I hung up, and immediately called the police,
> >> > saying that I lived at 1802 West 34th Street, and I was
> >> > on my way over there to kill my gay lover.
> >> >
> >> > Then I called Channel 11 news about the gang war going
> >> > on West 34th Street.
> >> >
> >> > I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th St.
> >> > There, I saw two assholes beating the crap out of each
> >> > other in front of 6 squad cars, a police helicopter, and
> >> > news crew.
> >> >
> >> > Now, I feel better