Crime Alert: Maf

FBI FUGITIVE PUBLICITY

ECCENTRIC and DANGEROUS

Maf

Ken Wu

(most commonly used name)

DOB: October 19, 1980
Sex: Male
Height: 6'0";
Weight: 165-170pounds
Hair: Black
Eyes: dark brown
Race: Taiwanese

Ken Wu


THE CRIME


Kicked the doctor's chin when he was born; ran around in the house naked because he refused to be showered; break his first china during a dish washing lesson; started a fire in his back yard; kept a puppy under his parents' noses; stole NT 50 from his mom; pointed middle finger at a teacher he hated behind her back; started a mafia with Taiwanese and engaged in anti-Chinese-foreign pronvicemen activities; got into fights with other schools, classes, and street blocks; lifted fellow female classmates' skirts in second grade; had many of his pets killed in the past..

Ken Wu
is being sought in connection with the serial pet slaughter of approximately two mice, two quails, five fishes, one bat, two chickens, one duck, one cricket, two water beetles, and 100 ants from the capital city of Taiwan in EastAsia. He claimed to have legalized and humane scientific experiments with them, but the truth is still remain unknown..


REWARD


The FBI is offering up to three expired chocolate chip cookies for information leading to the apprehension of Wu.


REMARKS


Occupations:Mafia Godfather, student at UCLA

Scars or Marks: Three consecutive spots on his right side of the face, aka Orion's belt. A suicide-like scar on his right vein.

Complexion is yellow.

Ken Wu is believed to be in possession of a 5' long EASTON hockey stick and Wilson made baseball bat. Wu occassionally shaves and has noticeably brown eyes.

Nationality: Taiwanese; Taiwan

Place of Birth: Taipei City, Taiwan

Alias: Dong Dong, Kentaro, Kenichi, Tallguy, Rukawa, Mousie, Evil Barbie on the net: Mafia_Godfather, Maf, Invincible_Gook, Jesus_Is_Asian, Absolute_Loser


If you have any information concerning this case take no action yourself.
Contact the local police department or the nearest FBI Office.


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