notes/disclaimers
The Nation's Family
by Gilda Lily
I
FALLEN LEAVES OF AUTUMN
*"Shots were fired at the President's motorcade in Dallas. It is not
known how many shots at this time. The President has been wounded and
is being taken to Parkland Hospital."
"We are not certain of how serious the wounds are at this time. The
President is being treated by the Parkland doctors, as is Governor John
Connolly. Mrs. Kennedy and Mrs. Connolly were quickly escorted into the
hospital by the First Lady's Secret Service agent, Rufus Youngblood.
Vice President Johnson and his wife have been whisked into the
hospital."
"The shots appeared to have been fired from the Texas School Book
Depository, and Dallas police are questioning witnesses in Dealey Plaza
right now."
"The President has been given the last rites of the Catholic Church."
"President Kennedy is...dead. He died at...one o'clock...Eastern
Daylight Time."*
Thanksgiving was always a quiet holiday in the morning. There were no
presents from Santa for over-excited children to see and no eggs to be
found and deposited in a brightly-colored Easter basket at the end of
the backyard hunt. There was the smell of roasting turkey and the
occasional quiet footsteps down the hall of a roused sleeper on his or
her way to the bathroom.
Ray Vecchio was a happy man. He was stretched out in his bed with his
lover blissfully curled up at his side as he slept. Dief was imitating
his packmate and dreaming wolfie dreams, though as soon as he awoke he
would be down in the kitchen with his eye on the turkey.
Ray watched the golden rays of the early morning streak the sky. A
white plume from a high-flying jet crisscrossed the gold, and Ray
allowed a feeling of melancholy to pass. He squeezed Benny gently.
"Mmm." Blue eyes fluttered open.
"Sorry, love," Ray whispered and kissed the top of his lover's head.
"Didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep."
Benny murmured and obeyed, sliding down into sleep again.
*
Ray smiled as Benny awoke for good this time. It was a half hour later
and the Mountie looked thoroughly rested. Dief was yawning and the sun
was higher in the sky.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Ray."
"Happy Thanksgiving, Benny." Ray loved to look into those sapphire
eyes. "You ready to try and grab the bathroom before Frannie gets in
there? Otherwise you might have to come down to dinner in your
bathrobe."
"Oh, no, I wouldn't want to do that." Benny's smile was mischievous.
"Though it would be interesting to see your family's reaction."
"Your family now, too, don't forget." Ray kissed Benny's lips and felt
him smile.
"Yes, my family now, too." Benny's voice was full of satisfaction, and
Ray felt warmed. He rolled out of his lover's embrace and off the bed.
"Okay, I warned ya. If Frannie gets in there...!"
Benny merely laughed, lounging in bed as Ray grabbed his robe and
shrugged into it, opening the door and hurrying to the bathroom while
Dief passed him on the way downstairs. He wasn't kidding about Frannie.
He showered, shaved, and brushed his teeth, then returned to the
bedroom to get dressed. Benny watched him indolently, Ray ignoring him,
or at least pretending to do so. He scanned the clothes hanging in his
closet and finally chose a pair of charcoal-gray slacks and his
olive-green turtleneck shirt. The light glinted off his wedding ring
and he smiled as he slid sock-clad feet into loafers.
"You're really lazy today, aren't you?"
"Yes," Benny purred, stretching and letting the sheet slip far below
his waist. Ray swallowed and decided to leave before he found himself
naked again and with an armful of hot Mountie. That wouldn't be so bad,
of course, but he wanted to make sure that his mom had plenty of help in
the kitchen.
He quietly went down the stairs and entered the kitchen, his mouth
watering at the wonderful smells. Dief was seated before the oven and
watching the turkey with an intense stare. Ray shook his head in fond
exasperation and patted the wolf's head. He saw the cutting board and
the chopped onions laying on top of it, but no signs of his mother. He
was about to investigate when Rosa came up from the cellar, carrying a
jar of preserves.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Ma!"
"Happy Thanksgiving, Raymondo!" Rosa kissed her son's cheek and beamed.
"Do you think Benton will like my peach preserves, caro?"
Ray suddenly began coughing and Rosa had to thump him on the back.
"Y...yeah, Ma. He'll love 'em."
"Good." Rosa was dressed in a plum-colored dress and her favorite
apron: large red roses with white frills. It was the kind of apron that
covered her from bosom to knees and she was in her element. "Sit down,
Raymondo, and I'll get you breakfast."
"No, Ma, you're busy with the meal. I'll get my own breakfast, then
I'll help you."
Ray ate a light breakfast of grapefruit halves and toast. Considering
the amount of food he was going to consume today, it seemed like the
wise thing to do.
Mother and son chatted quietly in the kitchen, Ray happy to get some
time alone with his mother. She was always distracted by children or
grandchildren, and it was nice to talk in a leisurely fashion. He
finished his breakfast and cleaned up, then started helping her with
dinner preparations.
"Ah! Good morning, Benton."
Ray turned to see Benny standing in the doorway, freshly-scrubbed and
wearing his white knit sweater and fawn-colored slacks. His heart
fluttering, Ray grinned. "Yeah, Benny, c'mon, shake a leg. You're
family, right? Time to peel some potatoes."
"Raymondo!" Rosa scolded.
"No, Rosa, Ray's right. I should pull my fair share." Benny's smile
was incandescent as he crossed the kitchen to stand next to his lover
and peel potatoes.
It was bliss, Ray decided. To have Benny here in his home, accepted as
his mate, their union blessed with rings and a ceremony and a civil
union license from Vermont, was the pinnacle of happiness for him. He
sighed in bliss as Benny's arm brushed against his own. What more could
a man ask for?*
**
II
CHOCOLATE CREAM AND PUMPKIN
*Ray could hear the sounds of munchkin feet running around upstairs and
went into the living room to turn on the TV. The Macy's Thanksgiving
Day Parade would be starting soon.
*"Firefighters from Ground Zero will be treated to hot turkey dinners
today, courtesy of the many thousands of donations pouring into the
city. Security will be very tight for the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade
held today as the police presence will be strong..."*
Ray's six-year-old niece Theresa ran in with her arms up. "Uncle Ray!
Happy Thanksgiving!"
"Happy Thanksgiving, Sweetpea." Ray hugged her and tousled her dark
curls. "Go on in the kitchen and get some cereal, and you can eat it in
here."
"Okey dokey!" Theresa skipped off to the kitchen and returned with a
bowl of dry Rice Krispies and a glass of orange juice. She set both
carefully on the coffee table, using a coaster for the glass, and Ray
hid a grin. Theresa was as neat and precise as her Uncle Benny.
"Enjoy, sweetheart." Ray returned to the kitchen, and Maria came
downstairs with Tony, Jr. a few minutes later.
Fifteen minutes later, everyone in the house was up and downstairs
except for Frannie, who was planted in the bathroom on what was probably
a permanent basis. Noise babbled on from adults and children as the
parade began. Benny and Ray found themselves with munchkin duty and
settled into the living room to watch the parade.
"Ooh! Lookit! It's Curious George!" Theresa exclaimed, pointing a
chubby finger at the screen. The giant balloon bobbed in the wind, its
handlers holding onto their guidewires.
The marching bands were crisp and tuneful as the majorettes twirled
their batons, Ray commenting, "Aren't they cold?" as they smiled and
stepped their way in scanty outfits.
"Actually, Ray, cold is a relative..."
"Benny."
"I should be quiet?"
"Yes."
One of the parade hosts said chirpily, *"And here's the New York City
Fire Department marching!"*
Cheers and wild waving greeted the firefighters, who smiled and waved
back. The long lines of blue dress uniforms stretched out for what
looked like blocks. Directly behind them came the police officers, also
in blue and also waving.
The voice of the host said, *"You know, there was talk of cancelling
the parade this year after the events of September 11th. Cancelling the
Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade has only happened for three years during
World War II. Also, in 1963, it was considered, as during the weekend
of the assassination all sporting events except for the NFL were
cancelled, and other events of note. It was decided that the parade
would carry on, but the floats were draped in black."
"There was definitely an empty place at the nation's Thanksgiving table
that year."
Ray and Benny's faces were solemn.
"Yes, and of course there are so many more this year in personal
families."*
Ray reached over and curled his fingers around Benny's.
*"It makes you stop and think, doesn't it? How much we've come through
as a nation but how much we have to be thankful for."*
Ray turned and said in a whisper, "I know what I'm thankful for."
Benny smiled shyly and whispered back, "Me, too."
Delicious aromas wafted from the kitchen. Ray's stomach grumbled.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Benton."
"Oh, Happy Thanksgiving, Francesca."
Frannie stood in the entranceway of the living room, her dress tight
and her make-up perfect. Dangling earrings matched the necklace she
wore with low cleavage. Ray rolled his eyes. Frannie knew that the
Mountie was taken but she couldn't help putting on the warpaint.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Sis."
"Oh, I didn't notice you sitting there, Ray." Frannie's tone was syrupy
sweet.
Ray grinned. "I know. Benny's beauty dazzled you."
"Ray!"
Ray just laughed as Frannie smiled, too. She turned around and
sashayed to the kitchen.
"Francesca, um, certainly likes to get dressed up for holidays," said
Benny, looking a little flushed.
"Yeah, well, she's a clotheshorse. Not that you'll ever have that
problem, eh, Benny?"
Benny smiled. "No, Ray."
They settled back against the couch and continued watching the parade
and keeping an eye on the little ones.
Relatives began to arrive, and the noise quotient grew louder as
various Vecchios hobnobbed and caught up on family gossip. Benny made
sure to stay close to Ray on the couch, the boisterous clan still able
to spook him a little even after all these years.
An hour later, Maria, Frannie and female cousins and aunts started
bringing out piping-hot dishes to the table. Tony had arrived in the
living room with his youngest child, the baby cooing and laughing.
Benny got up and helped the women, Ray still in charge of the children.
He amiably talked with Uncle Lorenzo and other relatives as upcoming
football games were discussed.
"Look! It's Santa!" Theresa exclaimed, pointing at the jolly
red-suited gentleman on the screen.
"Yep, and it's time for all kids to be good," Ray said with a
green-eyed twinkle.
"I always am, Uncle Ray!"
"Yes, I know, sweetheart." Ray kissed the little girl's fragrant hair
and she giggled.
"Hey, it's almost eats time!" Tony said, bouncing his baby on his knee.
"That it is."
They still had to wait for the signal, and children and adults squirmed
with eager anticipation. Finally Rosa came out of the kitchen and
announced, "Dinner is ready!"
There was a mad scramble for the dining room, and somehow Tony got to
his chair first, even loaded down with a squealing baby. Ray shook his
head. It had to be a gift.
After everyone was in their chairs, Rosa tapped a fork to her glass for
their attention. Everyone focused on the Vecchio matriarch.
"Thanksgiving is always a time to be appreciative of what we have. I
think that is more true than ever this year. So many terrible things
have happened, but we still have each other. Let us give thanks."
"Hear, hear!" said Frannie as she raised her glass.
Everyone drank and then Rosa said with a smile, "Dig in!"
The food was divine. The roast turkey was tender and succulent, and
there was rich ziti with tomato sauce, creamy whipped potatoes with
garlic, butternut squash with sprinkled brown sugar on top, hamburger
stuffing with onions, baby carrots, green beans, yams, homemade
cranberry sauce, and corn muffins. Rosa had already lined up a dessert
menu that consisted of pies: chocolate cream, pumpkin, cherry, pecan,
and lemon meringue. Benny figured that he would have to run ten miles
tomorrow to work it all off. Then again, maybe he had another method of
burning off calories. He blushed a little at the thought.
The meal was the usual Vecchio style of loud talk, laughter and
multiple conversations. Benny felt grateful indeed for his inclusion in
this special family, and he rested his hand on Ray's thigh under the
yellow tablecloth. Ray registered his hand with a lift of his eyebrow,
but never missed a beat in his conversations with Maria, Cousin Angela,
and Aunt Concetta. He happily took another helping of turkey, stuffing,
and yams and waved his fork around in emphasis of a point. Benny took
seconds on turkey, stuffing, and a corn muffin. He knew that Dief was
happily devouring his share of the Thanksgiving feast in the kitchen,
and knew that he would have to get his wolf to run with him tomorrow.
Suddenly, he felt Ray's warm hand on top of his and he smiled as he
took a sip of ginger ale.
Everyone stuffed themselves, and then the pies were announced. A
collective groan went up from the table, then orders for what kinds were
cheerfully thrown out. Rosa nodded, in her element, and didn't need to
write them down. She never did. She and her daughters went out to the
kitchen to fill the orders, and Benny figured he was shamelessly
indulging himself with the chocolate cream but couldn't help himself.
He seemed to lose all willpower at this table.
Ray had chosen pumpkin and was involved in a sports argument with one
of his cousins. The pies began to come out and when everyone had a
piece and the Vecchio women had resumed their seats, they all attacked
the pies as if they were starving instead of having stuffed themselves
with more food than an army could eat in a week.
The meal was, as always, a rousing success, and the clean-up went
quickly with many hands. After an hour of sitting and watching
football, Benny and Ray went for a walk at halftime. Benny didn't mind
watching the games all afternoon as long as he got a chance to walk, and
Ray always indulged him How could he not indulge the most beautiful man
in the world?*
**
III
HAVEN
*The neighborhood was quiet, most of the families still eating or away
visiting other people for the holiday. Occasionally a car would pass by
or a dog would bark, but Benny and Ray were essentially alone as they
walked through the streets of the neighborhood that Ray called home.
Ray's hands were in the pockets of his charcoal-gray coat, his heart at
peace. This neighborhood was safe. He and a lot of other cops worked
hard to keep it that way. Of course, part of the reason for the lack of
crime was the fact that Frankie Zuko lived in the neighborhood, and it
was bad form to commit crimes in the backyard of a Mafia chieftain, but
Ray knew that the 27th Precinct kept their eyes on things. Many cops
and firefighters lived in this neighborhood, noble and time-honored
professions for the descendants of immigrant ancestors.
His family was safe. Despite the horrors of the world, they were safe
here in this place.
And he had Benny. Best of all, most of all, he had Benny. He squeezed
his lover's hand.
Benny turned his head to look at Ray and smiled, squeezing back. "A
nice day," he said softly.
"Yeah." Ray's emerald eyes were luminescent. "Have I told you that I
love you lately?"
Benny's smile grew brighter. "Every day. In every way."
Ray laughed. They continued to hold hands as they walked.
"Y'know, that parade announcer mentioning JFK's death...I don't
remember much of it 'cause I was too young, but I do have fragments of
memories: Ma crying, snatches of the funeral people talking about it at
Thanksgiving. It was less than a week after he was killed. From what
Ma has told me since then and what I've read, people were scared to
death that day that Russia was making a move to some big coup. They
thought Government officials would be targeted like Booth and his
conspirators targeted Lincoln and Johnson and Seward back in 1865.
People were scared and shocked and just numb." Ray sighed. "I understand
that a lot better now."
"Yes, Secretary of State Seward was brutally attacked. Luckily for
Vice President Johnson, his assigned attacker couldn't go through with
it." Benny, of course, knew American history inside out.
"Lincoln's did. He believed in a cause, one he was willing to die
for. Damn, Benny. What makes people like that?"
Benny's eyes were sad. "Many things, Ray. Poverty, rage, helpnessness,
jealousy. So many things."
"Yeah." Ray hunched his shoulders against a sudden gust of wind. "Did
you know that Jackie Kennedy had her husband's blood and brains on her
suit and stockings? Of course you'd know. You know American history
better than Americans." Ray's emerald eyes were sad. "All over that pink
suit, for everyone to see. And when she and the rest of the entourage
landed at Dulles, the JFK's brother Bobby was the first to greet her?
He was never the same after that day. Never the same."
They stopped walking, expressions faraway, then Ray squeezed Benny's
hand again. A small smile lit his face.
"What say you and me go back to the house and watch the All-American
tradition of guys trying to knock the stuffing out of each other on the
football field?"
"That sounds lovely, Ray. Though the Canadian version can be just as
bone-crunching."
"Canadian football? Bone-crunching? Ha, Benny! Next you'll be
tellin' me that curling is a sport."
"It is, Ray. A fine old..."
Their voices faded as they walked back to the house.*
**
IV
STANDING TALL
*Benny and Ray planted themselves on the couch, Dief at their feet, and
watched American football for hours with the Vecchio relatives. The
children played noisily and a few arguments were broken up and then
quickly forgotten as they re-applied childish energies. The women sat
in the dining room and talked, cracking walnuts, almonds and hazelnuts,
and the men ate popcorn and potato chips and drank beer. Benny was
amazed at the capacity for anyone to eat after the feast they'd
consumed. He drank bottled water and refrained from any more food, but
Ray more than held his own with his uncles and cousins. Benny could
never figure out how such a slender body could hold so much food and
never gain an ounce. He patted his own stomach ruefully, knowing that
if he didn't exercise he was going to gain weight from today.
A bowl of nuts found their way to the coffee table, and he broke down
and cracked a few, blushing as Ray whispered something dreadfully bawdy
about nuts in general and his in particular. Ray returned to his
yelling at the screen at the latest fumble, and Benny thought how much
he would enjoy fumbling with Ray later.
The day ended with yet another meal, leftovers from the feast, people
eating smaller portions but still eating. And then little ones were
packed off and the relatives gone, leaving behind a quiet house and the
drone of the TV.
All very typical, all very normal, even when times were anything but
normal.
Benny and Ray went hand-in-hand up the stairs to their bedroom and
closed the door behind them.*
Author's Notes:
When I noticed that the date for Thanksgiving this year was November
22nd, it made me think of that date in 1963 and the similarities between
that horrific event and the one we suffered in 2001.
In 1963, the President of the United States, John Fitzgerald Kennedy,
was cold-bloodedly executed in broad daylight on a gorgeous autumn day
in an American city.
In 2001, nearly 6,000 citizens (and non-citizens) of the United States
of America were cold-bloodedly executed in broad daylight on a gorgeous
autumn day in an American city (and on American planes).
In 1963, the Nation lost its leader, its symbolic 'father' or 'older
brother', our psyche forever changed. Our innocence was lost that day.
The Nation's family wept.
In 2001, the Nation lost nearly 6,000 of its brothers and sisters, our
psyche forever changed. Our innocence was lost that day. The Nation's
family wept.
In 1963, there was an empty place at the national table on
Thanksgiving.
In 2001, there are nearly 6,000 empty places at many families' tables
on Thanksgiving.
In 2001, we've had more than two months to try and deal with the
horror.
In 1963, we had less than a week.
What better tribute could be made than families all over America
celebrating what it means to be an American and to cherish their
families than having a typical Thanksgiving? That traditions like the
Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade continues, whether draped in black or
cheering on firefighters and police officers?
In 1963, the Nation reeled in shock, and yet we persevered. Our
Government did not fall apart. Our citizens stood tall and strong
despite their grief.
In 2001, we will do the same.*