C.J.: Why'd he refuse the breathalyzer?
Toby: Because he's a crazy man who's out to ruin my life.

Sam: I'm nuts for dental hygiene.

CJ: Josh.
Josh: What the hell happened?
CJ: I had root canal.
Josh: What happened to your cheeks?
CJ: I had root canal.
Josh: Why are you talking like that?
CJ: I had root canal!
Josh: Yeah, I heard you the first time. I was just amusing myself.
CJ: I can suggest some other things you can do with yourself.
Josh: Are you in pain?
CJ: I had root canal!
Josh: You're going to have to stop saying that because you just look and sound so ridiculous.

CJ: You get hostile!
Josh: I get "hot stuff"?

Toby: We've been navigating by the north star, which turns out to be the Delta Shuttle from LaGuardia. It's a miracle were not in Nantucket right now.

Josh: They have telephones in Nova Scotia. It's not Amish Country.

Toby: CJ, so help me, if you use the words "Pwesident" or "bwiefed" again...

Mendoza: They pulled me over because I look like my name is Roberto Mendoza and I'm coming to rob your house.

Josh: There's no such thing as a typical day. There's a schedule and a structure to be sure. And to a certain extent it starts off as a 9-5 job, but it's blown to hell by 9:30.

CJ: I stepped off the edge of the world. . . .
Toby: Believe me when I tell you this, C.J., I will figure out a way to blame this on you...
Leo: There's an Air Force Lear Jet with its motor running... CJ, Sam sees one reporter when he gets off that plane, I'm going to blame you.
CJ: Toby's got you covered there. . . .
Leo: I want my phone to ring once every 15 minutes. I want to know what's going on.

Leo: I think an apology would be appropriate.
Bartlet: That went pretty well. (Full well knowing he made the matter worse.)
Leo: We'll fix it.

Leo: I've got a video tape of your side of the story. We blew the press conference, we'll cop to that.
(Housing and Urban Development Secretary O'Leary feels she has an obligation as the highest ranking African American woman in government and she also feels she was justified in what she said. Leo, though, has other ideas.)
Leo: I think Debby, that your role first and foremost is to serve the President. . . . you're going to apologize for [your comments].
O'Leary: I can't.
Leo: You can.
O'Leary: I won't.
Leo: You w-i-l-l.
O'Leary: Is that an order?
Leo: You're doing great work, Deb. The President's nuts about you; always has been. He'll cry for three minutes after he fires your ass...That's the cost of doing business. . . .
O'Leary: Done.
Leo: Never argue with a drunk or a fool.

Josh: You guys have been coddled.... I'm a graduate of Harvard and Yale and I believe my powers of debate can rise to meet the Socratic wonder that is the White House press corps.

Josh: I feel really bad about this.
Leo: You do?
Josh: Yes.
Leo: Well, I guess that's all that really matters.

Leo: Mr. President, we experienced a few public relations, what's the word. . .
Tony: Catastrophes.
Leo: . . .Incidents.

Bartlet: You said you'd fix it.
Loe: I did fix it.
Bartlet: It's broken again, Leo.

Bartlet: I'm tired, I'm cranky and my wife's in Argentina. Let's get this over with.

Toby: You're killing me, Judge. You're absolutely killing me.

Bartlet: Are you telling me that not only did you invent a secret plan to fight inflation, but now you don't support it?
Josh: When you put it like that, it....
Toby: Mr. President, much as we'd love nothing more than to stand here and watch you beat the living crap out of Josh, there's actually a bigger fish to fry.
Bartlet: What did Mendoza do?