Sam: Please, oh please, let them not be watching.(After getting creamed by Ainsley)

Josh: Toby, come quick. Sam's getting his ass kicked by a girl.
Toby: Ginger, get the popcorn.

Bartlet: I can sense civic duty a mile away.
Leo:. . . . She can always have my job, Mr. President.
Bartlet: Yes, she can.

Leo: You have an interesting conversational style, you know that?
Ainsley: It's a nervous condition.
Leo: I used to have a nervous condition.
Ainsley: How did yours manifest itself?
Leo: I drank a lot of Scotch.
Ainsley: I get sick when I drink too much.
Leo: I get drunk when I drink too much.

Ainsley: Say they are smug and superior. Say their approach to public policy makes you want to tear your hair out. Say they like high taxes.and spending your money. Say they want to take your guns and open your borders but don't call them worthless. . . . The people I have met have been extraordinarily qualified. Their intent is good. Their commitment is true. They are righteous, And they are patriots. And I'm their lawyer.

Bartlet: Leo, hard as you might try, the Republican party isn't going anywhere.
Leo: We don't know that for sure, sir. They could all end up moving to Vancouver.
Bartlet: I don't think so.
Leo: Me neither but being in power means everybody else can take a seat for four years.

CJ: That's not the only bargain in Pakistan, Toby. My girlfriends and I go for the spring fashions.
Toby: It shows.