¤ The Things People Say

1 * 2

"Never mess with a stapler when you are tired."
--Vendence

"I like the word crotch."
--Gina

"That's like taking the Smurfs and making a soap opera out of them."
--Karen

"Oh god, I am friend to a complete dumbass."
--Vendence

"Are you going to tell Crysta about my thing with Conor?"

"Oh my God. I just put 'my' and 'Conor' in the same sentence."
--Gina

"I found a dead bird on my porch once and I cried and buried it."
--Ryan B.

"Yes! I'm practically ontime today! That's a first."
--Brandon S.

"I've never met a fillipino I didn't like. Why did I just say that?"
--Ryan B.

"I bet he wanted to wear a thong."
--Gina

"Just tryin' to cover my ass here."
--Alec

"Sheep are better."
--Nicole

"They wear bagpipes without anything underneath."
--Gina

"I have ten pennies."
--Zanny

"Just make fun of his goatee."
"What goatee?!"
 Ben, Bladel

"That bitch can just suck my cock."
"You have a cock?!?!"
 Meagan, Sean

"I scratched myself, YAY!"
--Gina

"Once, in preschool, I put a rock up my nose and never found it."
--Karen

"This is my tummy, these are my hips, this is my arm, this is my other arm, and this is my finger."
--Karen

"Did you just touch my butt?.... You just smacked my butt, did you know that?"
--Adam

"Quit it with the freakin' squeakin'"
"Freakin' squeakin'?"
"That was the worst rhyme I have ever heard in my life."
Jimmy, Brian

"Hey, you gave that teddy bear titties.... Those aren't arms.... Man, it's like stuffed animal porn."
--Lee

"I hear tearing duct tape and it's like, a traumatizing experience."
--Anthony

"Boojiefuckisaurus."
--Craig

"MAGIC DUCKS!"
--Craig

"Marshmallows are soft you silly man."
--Sam

"Oooohhh... The paaaaaaiiiiin, it huuuurts..."
--Cedric

"I mean, why shower if I'm just going to get dirty again?"
--Anthony

"I keep my brains in cotton balls."
--Karen

"Does this mean we should get a room Crysta?"
--Karen

"He can't control the bodily fluids exiting his body."
--Karen

"BURN IT!"
--Sean H.

"I like pretty bows."
--Mary

"I wanna poke it! I wanna poke it!"
  Collective

"One squeeze isn't enough."
--Karen

"Someone takes one in the balls and it stops being fun."
--Phil

"... Make the ground stop moving..."
--Anthony

"I'm going to close my eyes, spin around, and run towards the board."
"You'd probably have a better chance if you did!"
  Anthony, Irwin

"Don't be bitter because you don't get any."
--Krystina

"I do not go through life looking at what I have not done, I go through it looking at what I have. Except when there are police , then I change it around."
--Vendence

"You know, I don't really appreciate you humping my backpack."
--Ronny

"You know what's cool about snow? You can snowboard on it. And it's cold."
--Jimmy

"It's a penis necklace!"
--Jimmy

"Ah! My hair! It might pop the ball!"
--Anthony

"Ha ha, you're stupid."
"He's right man, you are pretty stupid."
  Wyatt, Jimmy

"But for all you know I could be a really smart goat."
--Vendence

"He's a poisonous seed, not a bad one."
--Jimmy

"The office?... Nah, I think I'll stay here. I don't like the office."
--Rafael

"When I grow up I want to be spanish."
--James

"But I thought you liked fingers Emi!"
"Only on the outside Crysta, only on the outside."
Crysta, Emi

{Einie meanie miny moe,
 catch a pimpette by her ho,
 if she hollers Crysta knows,
 and that's the way the story goes.}
--Collaberation of the Lunch Table

"Is it snowing? ... I thought I saw white."
"Cedric, all around you you see white."
"Aaah!"
  Cedric, Anthony

"Oh, you guys match."
"Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-shut up."
  Tiffany, Anthony

"Jimmy, stop talking and shut up."
--Allan

"Jimmy lives in a weird world."
"Yeah, it's called America."
  Allan, Rafael

"I can hear me on the inside, but I can't hear you on the outside!"
--Jimmy

"I need a man..."
"You don't need a man. All you need a puppy to pick up after and a power tool."
  Jenna's friend Susan, Jenna

"Maybe I can claim sanctuary, wait, I don't like christians. Damn it all."
--Vendence

"I don't have low self-esteem, I'm very confident that I'm ugly."
--Craig

"He's not gay, he's just Mormon."
--Monica

And in retaliation to that stupid remark:
"Oh, he's not gay, he's just acting a little Catholic today."
--Brandon S.

"He's acting a little on the Presbyterian side today, if you know what I mean."
--Brandon S.
[End retalitaion]

"Doesn't anyone around here have any morals?"
"No, not really"
  Parker, Emi

"This school has so many druggies."
"And then there's the people who aren't on drugs and everyone thinks they are. Like me and Kimmy."
  Parker, Emi

"There isn't one person in this school who hasn't tried drugs at least once."
"I HAVEN'T."
  Evan, Kimmy & Emi

"Submarine!"
"Is that a whale?"
"Yes, it's a whale."
  Allan, Joey, Jimmy

"Look, undercover rednecks."
--Kira

"It looks like a little Inca in bondage."
--Kira

"I should cross-dress more often."
--Anthony

"Hey, I don't appreciate that kind of language. Stupid bitch."
--Anthony

"You can't read it, you can't read it!"
"Dude... Nobody can read it."
  Allan & Wyatt, Rafael

"And there's times you wish you just didn't have ears."
--Phil

"Speaking like a bull... Says moo."
--Phil

"They screw you over."
"Excuse me, what'd ya say?"
"They screw you over."
"Wait, what did you say again?"
"Uh...[frantically looking for a place to hide]"
  Phil, Rosenthal

"Why is there toilet paper in your car?"
--Emma

"All that energy in such a weird girl."
--Kim

"Woah, you're twitching. I've never actually seen anybody do that before."
--Kim

"Friendship is a lifesaver."
"It's round and brightly colored?"
"..."
  Liz, Hawk

"No no my gigolo!"
--Tiakien

"You're a tattle-tale."
--Erika

"Stop making the process look like an orgasm."
--Hawk

"Stop trying to eat Christina. ... That didn't sound right."
--Anthony

"Since when did your finger become a penis?"
--Karen

"Never pet a wild dragon."
--Sarah

"That was weird... But it was still funny..."
--Jimmy

"Sure, he's cute, in a monkey-like sort of way."
--Tia

"I am reverse inertia man, push me."
--Barg

"Idiots make the world fun."
--Catelf

"That's it, I'm getting my whip out."
--Barg

"Indiana Liz and the lost tampons!"
--Saunders

"The hordes of children are descending upon the house and the group of music playing teens must flee."
--Ven

"This water is not wet."
--Jessica W

"Those people outside are harassing me."
--Chem class David

"Harry Potter is coming to kill us all!"
--Amy A

"I think You've gotten me into the habit of having more than one person inside my head because I swear I can hear to voices when I'm thinking things over. I'm gonna kill you for it."
--Emma

"I may be big but I'm a marshmallow."
--Mike

"But sometimes we don't have the option of electing anyone itelligent."
--Kyle