Back to the story...the camera whips through the alphabetical listings in the graveyard, and begins to slow down as it comes to K, then onto all of the letter L's, M's, N's and then finally coming to a stop at the first grave, marked O. The first grave site that is seen, is none other than the father of "The Nitemare" Rob Osbourne, "The Crippler" Joseph Osbourne. The camera stays focused upon this one gravestone for a few seconds and slowly moves out as we see the shadow of a man standing in front of the grave. Zooming out even farther, the camera catches something shiny in the background, something that appears to be...golden. Turning and walking out of the sun, the glowing object appears to be a title belt...a title belt from the SAW. The camera moves in an upward motion, and reveals "Too Xtreme" Eric Badger standing in front of Joe Osbourne's tombstone.
Pondering why Eric is standing in the path of the tombstone, shockingly, the man gets down on his knees, and begins reciting the lords prayer. After saying it, and then kneeling for a moment of silence, he rises up to his feet again, and backs back onto the path of the graveyard, and turns to face the camera. Giving a little chuckle, he begins to explain why he has made his way to Nashville, TN, just to stop by and visit, Joe Osbourne.***
Eric - Well, here I am, standing on the site of the great Joe Osbourne's death bed. "The Crippler" had an awesome life, actually living the American dream. Sleeping with hookers and having unprotected sexual intercourse with them, having one kick ass family, and raising two awesome kids in the process. Rob and Chris. "The Nitemare" and "The Daydreamer." What a bunch of animals. You see, I've come here to Nashville, for a few reasons. One is to set the slate clean, and reveal something so amazingly awesome, that it will boggle your mind, and another is to rip up Jimmy Blast again, for the umpteenth-dozen time. Another reason, is that I'm visiting some rather close people to me, that I haven't really spent much time with over the past few years.
First of all, Jimmy Blast, "The Blaster" trying to pick up some chick off of daytime television, either that, or trying to pick up some guy that has the most annoying game show on national television. I'll go with that one, and yes Jimmy, that is my final answer. I've got a question for you though Jimmy, and you have to tell me the answer. Why did I change the title belt to the Canadian Title? Is it A) Greed, B) Nationalism, C) Respect, or D) Prejudice? Well seeing as you don't know what half those words mean, I'll tell you that the answer is both C) Respect, and D) Prejudice. That's right Jimmy, the SAW is prejudice against all of us Canadians in the world, especially your friend, Mr. Pledge Allegence. He didn't have the balls to change it to the North American Title, now did he? He left it the way it was, and now that no one has been good enough to take it from me, everyone backstage is crying about how I am disrespecting this piece of scrap metal. Hell, I couldn't care less if I had it.
You guys get so bent out of shape if someone does something before you get a chance to. What were you going to do that I did already Jimmy? Change a title belt? Join forces with Rob Osbourne? Not likely...so what is it Jimmy? Was it to sleep with your mother? No you beat me to that as well. Damn, well, I guess I'll have to wait and find out which thing pissed you off the most. Was it the comments I made about your father? I meant every last one of them, and you damn sure know that I wasn't lying about any of them. Your father was a washed up old hag that never got his way, and I hate to break it to you Jimmy, you are just like him. Sure you can say that I never knew your father, but my buddy Robby has told me a few tidbits of information, which I will not release with you. Jimmy Blast, I've got something that will blow that wig right off of your bald scalp later on in this interview, so keep reading and you'll get to the bottom of things.
Before I head off to my friends place, I just have to say this Jimmy. From the first time you met me, you've realized that I am better than you have ever been. You claim that I am Immature for this business, but that's what helps me exceed all the expectations, its what keeps me together, and its also what puts me up above all the other wrestlers here in SAW. It psyches them out so much that they think lightly of me, and then BAM! I hit them with the Extremely Impossible and the match is over, it's as easy as it sounds. Jimmy, I thought you were alot smarter than you've proven to be, but in all essence, you've proved that you are more cenile than you've been in your life. You were the last person I thought would fall for the immaturity thing, but you went and made an ass of yourself, and it's time for me to put my foot to your ass and start beating you down, so you cannot breathe you last breath, at Madison Square Garden.
Now, if you will excuse me, I'll jump in my Escalade and head over to my friends maison, and soon enough Jimmy Blast, you and the rest of the world will know my secret, and it does have something to do with why I'm in a graveyard.
***Eric walks over to his vehicle, starts it up and tosses something at the cameraman. He picks it up and looks at it. It appears to be a book. Eric yells at him "It's the new #1 best seller! The Birth Of A Nitemare! Read It!" The cameraman puts the book in his carrying bag, or knapsack, and walks over to the cab that has been waiting for him. He gets in the cab and orders the cabbie to follow the Escalade in front of him. The two head off after the vehicle that Eric is driving, and eventually come to a large house in Nashville. No, not Dolly Partons mansion that her tit's paid for, or Toby Keith's trailer. The mailbox on the way in reads "Osbourne" and the mystery unfolds even more as the cab makes its way up the long driveway, and right up to the door step where Eric has already made his way to the door.
Eric presses the button for the doorbell to ring, and awaits someone to answer the door. The man that answers the door, is none other than the king of SAW, the Undisputed Champion, "The Nitemare" Rob Osbourne! Rob and Eric embrace in a hug, as Rob invites Eric inside. The two walk into the living room, and plop down in their respective chairs. Rob offers Eric a cold drink and a copy of his new book, entitled The Birth Of A Nitemare, which Eric turns down due to owning about seven at the moment. The two begin to talk about this Sunday's Pay - Per - View, called Genesis. The true beginning as we know it.***
Eric - Well Rob, it's good that we finally got some time to ourselves, away from the media, and the wrestlers, just to talk about certain issues and rumours that have been circulating throughout the SAW over the past few weeks. Do you think that everyone is ready for this? I mean, you're book just came out, and I don't think it's right for us to do this, like spoiling the ending of a movie, this is almost like spoiling part of your book man. If people know these parts, whats the point in buying The Birth Of A Nitemare?
Rob - Well Ricky, that's the difference between you and I, I mean, I'm filet mignon, and you're mashed potatoes and gravy. We're two different dishes, yet we're still in the same boat. I think that it's time for us to move out of this shadow, and let everyone know why you're here and why we've always been "together" around wrestling and during life.
Eric - I know, it's been eating me up inside as well, but I know, and you know, that this is very risky. This could jeopardize our Genesis matches for our respective titles, you do know that don't you? I mean, the backstage morale could drop dramatically before our very eyes, and we were the ones who caused it.
Rob - Well, Ricky man, it's time, we haven't had much catching up time, but I think it's time we go see dad, even from up in the heavens he's been watching down on us, watching us proceed as planned. Come on, what do we have to lose? A couple of title belts to a couple of losers that we could destroy one week later to gain the belts back? Big deal man, haven't I taught you anything?
Eric - I guess you're right, as usual. You know what's best for me, and what's best for yourself. So let's hop in the car and drive back to the graveyard, I agree, its finally time to get this monkey off my back, ever since that bitch gave birth to me I say.
Rob - Good man Ricky, let's burn rubber!
***The two men get into the vehicle, and go tearing off down and out of the driveway, and swing a right at the road to head back towards the cemetary where "Too Xtreme" Eric Badger, the SAW All-Canadian Champion, was earlier. The finally get there as the cameraman arrives in his cab a little while after. He searches for them, and is pleased to know that they are back at the grave site of one "The Crippler" Joe Osbourne. The two men share another prayer for Joe, and then begin to talk to him, seemingly from beyond the grave.***
Rob - Well dad, it's Rob here, again. Only this time, I've broughten Ricky with me. That's right dad, I found him, and I've been taking care of him for you, seeing as you're dead and everything. He's turning out to be a class act, like me, and just like you. We're about to tell the world our secret right now, infront of the world, but most importantly, infront of your gravestone. Ricky, do you want to do the honors?
Eric - Well, seeing as I'm here, I might as well. Ladies and Gentlemen around the world, watching this at home, I "Too Xtreme" Eric Badger has transformed, not literally, but mentally transformed, into what my brother has told me to do. Rob, I thank you for everything you've done for myself, and well for yourself too, because you've realized that you are one hell of a teacher, and you know that by seeing me work my ass off night after night, giving 110% and not caring what the fans think right now. No longer am I, Eric Badger, but I am going by my true given name, given to me by my father, Joe Osbourne. My real name is Ricky Osbourne, the real life brother of Rob and Chris Osbourne.
I am no longer under that name that the two bit whore of a mother I had back in Toronto had given me, I am now a true name in the wrestling world, an Osbourne, and I finally feel like I am one here in the wrestling world. This is no longer about the All-American Title, or the All-Canadian Title, because as of right now, I'm an Osbourne, I've always been an Osbourne, and Jimmy Blast, even if you manage to take this belt away from me, I know that I will always be a true champion, because I belong in the first family of wrestling.
Rob - (tearing up) Ricky, I've never been so proud to be your brother! come here!
***The two brothers hug again, infront of their father's tombstone,as the scene fades to black, and the Osbourne brothers have re-united as a force to be reconned with, not only in the Unholy Alliance, but in the SAW, the brothers are here to whoop some ass! But only one question remains, Is the SAW Ready For The Osbourne Brothers?***
Fade To Black
