DAMIEN: OMEN II
Poor stereotyped Satan

  All four Omen movies were on Space the other night; I've already reviewed the first, but there still wasn't enough room left on the tape for the remaining three, so this and The Final Conflict are all from this series I'll be reviewing any time soon.

I guess the best - and the worst - thing you can say about this movie is that it's more of the same. The Omen was a movie which was entertaining because it was so convinced of its own weight that it either won you over with its plea to be taken seriously or had you giggling nonstop at the straight-faced silliness of it all.  I was in the latter camp, though I suspect it wasn't in that spirit that The Omen was made a big hit when it came out.

So, bring on the sequel, sayeth the studio, and it did come.  A couple of guys (including Leo McKern, not exactly playing Gloucester here) have concluded that Damien Thorne is indeed the Antichrist, because he looks like this ancient face on an Antichrist mural (actually, the face looks as much like myself 'round age three as it does like Damien).  But, as is wont to happen to people who figure out that there's something devilish about this kid, they're killed in a freak accident.  In this case, buried alive.  Zip forward seven years, and Damien's living with his dead father's brother Richard (William Holden, showing no sign that he's the same William Holden who two years before was mad as hell and wasn't gonna take it anymore) and attending a fancy military academy.

(WHOA!!!  Looks like I'm getting my Network alumni mixed up here.  Every memory I have still ruminating on that movie is convinced that it was Holden with that role and that line, but no, he played someone else.  [smacks head smacks head smacks head])

And from there on it follows the familiar Omen pattern...what few people harbor suspicions of Damien's demonic origins (and a few more for the hell of it) die freakishly.  Here, you get to see one unlucky bastard get swept under the ice on a frozen river, another get pinned between railroad cars, another guy dies in an elevator (and not in any way you'd guess)...yeah, it's a sequel to The Omen, all right.  There's even a scene where somebody is mauled by a crow.  (I think it was supposed to be a raven, but c'mon, that's a crow)  Surely, I couldn't be the only person watching that scene and thinking "Christ, you stupid twit, just grab the fucking thing."

Director Don Taylor is not exactly going for subtlety here; the first appearance of Damien (Jonathan Scott-Taylor, with an English accent, natch...how does he retain an English accent when he's been living in America since he was six?) is framed by the rising flames of a burning pile of leaves.  Cute.  He also tends to use a Fulci-style ZOOM into people's eyes, except here it's a much slower zoom, which didn't help endear it to me any further.

Jerry Goldsmith's score is still enjoyable; that it's ludicrously overwrought is integral to its appeal.  The dialogue's what you'd expect (except for "...toxic chemicals we hope will one day feed the world's hungry"), but at least the Biblical references here aren't obviously made up (this time, screenwriters had the courtesy to name exactly which book and chapter they're from...oh, they still SOUND made-up, but I checked, and they're there).

Oh, not all of this is completely inane; there's a great scene where Damien, in a badly backfiring attempt from a teacher to humiliate him, recites with split-second timing (and, presumably, total accuracy) the death dates of various historical figures of increasing obscurity.  But most of this is exactly what should be expected by anyone who saw the original film, though I don't seem to remember anybody in The Omen being killed for opposing the turning of famine-strangled countries into corporate property.

I dunno.  I recommended The Omen because it's something you really have to see for yourself, and if you like it for the "right" reasons or the "wrong" ones (like I did), it's still a hoot.  Damien: Omen II is more of exactly the same, but hasn't a widespread claim of classic status to make it remotely necessary for anybody.  If, for whatever reason, The Omen made you think that you want to see more movies like it, this one's for you.  Watch for Lance Henriksen as a sergeant at the school who...well, he doesn't do anything, really.

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