VAMPIRE AT MIDNIGHT
It's still crap by 1:30

  Hey look, it's that cover art again - the chick, the dress, the neck holes.  Ding ding ding...what's that?  I do believe that's my crap detector.

You'd think that this would start out with some vampire movie clichés, but no.  It's with a stunningly overused cop-movie cliché - you know, the one where the cop hero proves what a maverick he is by defusing a hostage situation in a method that ain't by the book.  Just once, I wanna see a movie which starts with a hostage situation where...ah, fuck it.  I don't wanna see any more movies start with hostage situations.

Some maniac out there is committing heinous crimes the press refers to as "The Vampire Murders", as if their perpetrator wasn't really a vampire.  Yes, this killer either is a vampire, believes he is, or wants everybody to believe he is, and just which one doesn't much matter when he's got his fangs in your neck, I guess.  That plays-by-his-own-rules cop, needless to say, becomes the killer's nemesis.  He meets a concert pianist, screws her, finds her in grave danger from the killer, blah blah blah.

I kind of liked the heavy-on-the-pipe-organ score, and the villain (a hypnotherapist with a cool stiletto that he can jut out from his wrist).  The film also benefits over other recent vampire viewings thanks to an extra slice of brutality, not to mention some much-appreciated nudity.  But there's nothing new here, and nothing we don't see done better everywhere else all the time.

Unless you're like me and just HAVE to see everything horror-ish you come across (and God help you if that's the case), rent something else.

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