_{Your house smells like fried onions.}

_{When you tell your parents you got 98%, and they ask you what happened to the other two percent.}

_{When there is a sale on any item, you buy 100 of them.}

_{You make tea in a saucepan.}

_{You never buy bin bags, but use your saved grocery bags for it.}

_{You put your clothes in suitcases instead of wardrobes.}

_{You call an older person you've never met before "uncle".}

_{You hide everything from your parents.}

_{Your mother does everything for you if you are male.}

_{You do all the housework and cooking if you are female.}

_{Your relatives alone could populate a small city}

_{Everyone is a family friend.}

_{Everyone always called you for help on homework.}

_{You study law, medicine or engineering at university.}

_{You were thick so you studied computer science or business instead.}

_{You know no one who has studied music.}

_{You went to a university as far away from home as possible.}

_{You still came back home to live with your parents after you had finished.}

_{Your best friend got married at the age of 18.}

_{You only make long distance telephone calls after 6pm.}

_{You use chili sauce instead of tomato ketchup.}

_{You say you hate Desi films/songs but secretly watch/hear them with your parents.}

_{You teach Westerners swearwords in your language.}

_{You order Desi food in your own language to impress the people you're with but the waiters don't understand you.}

_{You avoid public places when with a member of the opposite sex, especially if there is an acquaintance within a 250 miles radius.}

_{You always say "open the light" instead of "turn the light on".}

_{You secure your baggage with a rope.}

_{You're walking out of customs with your trolley at the airport and you see all twenty-five members of your family who have come to pick you up.}

_{You get very upset when airlines refuse to accept your luggage which is just 80 lbs. overweight.}

_{You go back to your parents' country and people treat you like a member of the royal family.}

_{(For females) You're parents would freak out if you wore a crop top baring your midriff but wearing a sari is perfectly acceptable.}

_{(For females) Your brother had no curfew while you had to be home at 11pm}

_{You are ALWAYS taking off and putting on your shoes wherever you go}

_{When you were little you always wondered why your English friends waited until after breakfast to brush their teeth when you did it first thing in the morning.}

_{To your English friends, oil is used purely for cooking and not as a grooming aid}

_{You wonder how odd it would be to see your parents get within one foot of each other}

_{Your parents have nicknames but only because people they work with just stop when trying to read their names}

_{You have annoying nicknames like Chotu or Chicku}

_{Your parents call all your friends "Beta" (son) whether they are brown or not}

_{Your mother measures wealth in gold and diamonds}

_{Your parents drink 6 cups of tea a day}

_{Your parents push the concept of an arranged marriage on you and try to demonstrate how well it works whenever they're not fighting.}

_{Your parents compare you to all of their friends' kids.}

_{At least once a week your mom says, "I want to go to India/Pakistan"}

_{No one ever seems to call ahead of time to say they are coming over for a visit.}

_{Your parents worry what other people will think if you're not going to be a doctor/lawyer/engineer.}

_{You're parent's always say, "It's cheaper in India/Pakistan"}