SAILOR CPU
By Jared, reedited bu udx
Cast:
Sailor Moon
Stone Cold Steve Austin
Jared/Sailor CPU
Jesse
James
Meowth
UDX(udx: Dang, just a small cameo)
Pikachu
Pizza Cats
Leo Di-Crap-rio(another cameo, dang)
The Red Guy
Cranky Kong
And Mario Mario: Hey! Why am I at the bottom?
Because you are, second to me, sucker. HAHAHA!
(Scene opens at Celebrity Deathmatch arena, at one side, Leo on the
other. Everyone else is watching from Pizza Cat Restaurant)
Red Guy (on TV): LADIEEEEEES!!!!!.... and gentlemen...This is the battle
you've been waiting for!
Ooh, this should be good.
(with mouth full): Duh! Leo's going to dieeee!
PiPikachu!
Hey, Austin! You gonna finish that pizza or what?
I'll finish you if you don't shut up! C'mon, Moon. Let's get out
of here.
( grabs out of chair. Just as they head towards the
door, a red hard disk falls from above and pierces the floor as Tuxedo
Mask fanfare plays)
what the heck wuzzat?
(Everyone looks up to see a boy with a sailor outfit and glasses)
???: Allow me to introduce myself.
(??? jumps down to floor)
???: I am Sailor CPU, Champion of Justice. On behalf of Cyberspace I
shall right ROMs and triumph over viruses, and that means (points to
Austin) you!
I'd like to see you try!
(Suddenly, the room darkens)
To protect the world from devastation.
To unite all peoples within our nation.
To denounce the evils of truth and love.
To extend our reach to the stars above.
Jesse!
James!
Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light!
Surrender now or prepare to fight!
Meowwwth! That's riiight!
Hey! This is my big scene! Get outta here!
Make us.
Gladly!
(Sailor yells "CD ROM Smash!" and fires CDs from his hands at Team
Rocket. T.R. gets multiple cuts and bruises.)
& J Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off again!
Well, that was short!
Now where was I…. Oh yeah…. (turns to Austin) I suggest you run, or
else you'll receive much worse!
Ooh! Look at me! I'm a little sissy Sailor-man that thinks I can
beat a wrestler by using computer supplies! You think those little CDs
can kill me?
No. I was counting on the explosive hard disks.
uh-oh
( yells "Disk Cannon Fire!" His arm turns into a cannon, and fires
exploding hard disks at Austin. Austin blows up into a million pieces.)
Sweet!
D'oh! Yet another mess I have to clean up!
Pika? Pikapichu Pi Chu?
Why did I do that? Simple. Austin was trying to hypnotize Sailor
Moon into following his every command, and take over the world before
Pinky and the Brain succeed in doing so.
I thought it was just because he went out with her.
That too. I'll prove that he was hypnotizing her!
( walks over to and pulls off the Slave Crown that was
cleverly disguised as her tiara)
Hey! What am I doing here! What's going on?
It's a long story. Ask Mario.
Me? er… oh… uh…
I saved you from Steve Austin.
And you are….?
The newest Sailor Scout, Sailor CPU. I won't go through the process
of stealing your lines again.
Oh, great. Just joined the team and already you're stealing
my lines. You are the worst sailor scout I ever seened.
Shut up(Knocks out Sailor moon with DVD punch till the next episode)
Sorry, got a little overreacted.
( comes waddling up)
Hey, all you whipp-
(Cow falls on )
D'ooooooh! Not agaiiiin!
(Behind the wall)
Another Trick me and Sailor Moon pulled on you sucker. Udx and I will
punish you. To protect the world from devasation. To unite all peoples
within our nation, to dennounce the evils of truth and love, to extend our
reach to the stars above. BOTVGH blasts off at the speed of light.
Surrender now or prepair to fight.
Will Austin defeat Sailor CPU with this new found power from his new buddies,
or will Sailor CPU power his CD-roms to full power?
To Be continued.