Even If You Have Met Me; Most Likely You Have No Idea What Manner Of Man I Am

No prophet is without honor except in his own town and by his own kinsmen. Because people "think" they know me, or because they have seen me around, they are blinded of the authority of the calling of God upon me. I say this for the benifit of those who may meet me; That they can examine themself, to see if there be in them a heart of doubt or irreverence; For God had called me to a work. Therefore, People of God, give ear to what is being told, and you can be blessed.
OK , Now Let's go on




On the last day of 1981, I had a near death out of body experience. My body was dying. As I lay there looking at my body, I could see it as if it were dead. I left my body and went into a place that was very black, with other souls or spirits of people there. It was strange, because, I saw souls of a couple people who had passed on, and a couple who were still alive on earth. This place is the outer darkness; A place of torment, extreem severe anguish and distress of pains and horible agony to conscious and soul; Actually; No words on earth to a human mind can justly explain the endless terror of that place. My body in that place was like this body, only not flesh; But just as real in ability to feel pains. Fears in that place make the worst imagined on earth a fairy tale. In the outer darkness you are more than fully aware of eternity to a mind destroying degree; Our human earthly mind can not fathom the slightest bit of what eternity is, in our finite consciousness.
As I was in that aweful place, at times horrible creatures with insane faces would come rushing up to me with terrible crazy laughter right in my face. I tell you, you can not understand the fears of torment that caused me. When these things happened, I would hollar out curses to God and upon that, they would stab huge long swords through my spirit body; It hurt very much, but it could not kill you; your soul/spirit is unending, so they could cause you endless pains and you had no hope to die to escape it.
Then, at one point, a big devil; I dont know if it was The devil or a devil, but it came up to me and said: "Your life as you recall it on earth was just a dream, now you woke back up to reality" . I began screaming in rejection of those words " No ! No! No! , over and over. Then , with all my strength, I tried to dirrect my hope towards wherever or whatever God was; "please give me a chance to go back to earth and make it right!" Oh, I cried out that prayer so much and meaning it more than any person understands seriousness on earth.
The next thing I know, I'm back in my physical human earthly body. I got up and looked outdoors. The sun was up. It was about 8 or 9 AM. It was about 3 AM when I left my body into the outer darkness. I was there for about 5 hours. Now I was back, and So So glad, I could seem to hear the trees and grass outside praising and worshipping God. I thought as I looked at this world and the trees and grass and sky off that balcony, that I wanted to go down there and Kiss the ground!
I got a friend to give me a ride home, but satan caused him to be Very reluctant, because the devil was beginning to loose power over my life. As we neared my neighborhood, I had a knowledge within that I needed to get out of his car at the back of the property where I lived. Again there was serious reluctance from my friend; he insisted on driving all the way around town to let me out in my driveway; But I knew so much my destiny, that I said, either let me out here, at this back side of the property, or I jumping out; And began to open the car door to jump out. Then he realized enough, and stopped.
As I walked up that path through the woods to the shack I lived at; there was a creek to my right with thick thorn bushy weeds , and on my left were the back edges of backyard fences. A voice that I had heard before, which I always tried before to ignor and never tell anyone: this voice said: "Just keep on living like you were, dont make any rash or hasty decisions; everything will be fine" You see, I had been backsliden for about ten years, and was known of many people as a popular biker and partyer. The devil depended on me being an influence of living your own way without fear of consequence.
I said I dont know, that was a very terible thing I just went through; So I turned from that voice, and looked up towards God and said:" was that real?" And for the first time I heard God, He said "yes, it was real"
I had to pass by a yard where a very big white German Shepherd dog lived. That dog was as vicious as a dog could be. I hated going past there because of that dog, but normally I had at least my sheath knife and a pistol on me; This time I was unarmed. As I approached the fence along that path, that dog was crouched down bearing its teeth growling at me with bloody hatered in its eyes, while it was right there in the corner of the fenced in yard. I realized that dog could easily jump over that fence and chew me to shreds. But in that outer darkness, one of the torments was vicious creatures who were biting on my spirit body with huge long teeth like a tiger or lions teeth; I looked that dog straight in the eyes, and with a power from within me, I thought: "I've been through it tonight and I dont need yours" . Just from thinking that while looking eye to eye with that dog, it tucked its tail and ran up on the back door of the house. Later on I learned that about 3 days after I went through that, all the dogs hair fell out and it died. It saw reality in my eyes and it literally scared the hell out of that dog.
Seeing how that dog reacted, I knew that what I experienced was real, but at the time, I though it was hell. Once you are in hell, you dont come back; Not even many at all come back from the outer darkness. No one should Ever hope or desire to experience That! Anyhow; As I continued walking along, I was now coming to my sences, because from years before, I backslid , thinking I couldnt be a christian, not knowing the grace, mercy, patience, and power of God; But now, I'm coming to my sences. I recalled as a child , I watched a cat toying with a bird in the curb, biting at it, clawing at it, not really wanting it, but not letting it go, and tormenting it; I looked up to God and said from my heart to God " I cant believe you would be like that cat, that you would bring me back here to suffer fobias and inscurities and sorrows and emptiness like before on earth, Just to die and go back to that place of torment." "How can I know I wont go to hell when I die" And I meant these words with a strength of "ALL" like one doesnt normally know in normal human emotions, because all I just went through. Then I heard the answer from God ! It was as though the whole sky was His mouthpiece and my whole body were an ear. He said: "FOLLOW ME" . All I could do is have a heart full of "Yes Lord !" I went home into my shack, and prayed to God to lead and guide me, because I didnt know what it meant to follow him. That was January 1st 1982.
After that I heard the audible voice of God several times. We do not normally hear an audible voice of God; normally he speakes to us through a small still voice, or by an inward witness, like through his bible, or something someone says, sometimes even in a dream, and even through nature. But along the way, I heard God tell me I am an Apostle of Faith and Grace. And a Prophet of light, as God shows me to manifest correct understandings the church has gotten off over the years. And has made me to experience great miracles and healings all my life, as I first answered his call when I was about 7 years old, and seen angels and miracles and signs.

There are some very beautiful heavenly experiences I have been given from God. Several times I have been taken up into glory in the heavens.
One time, I was taken to heaven; I was taken to a place with very green grass where many men and women were standing around. It reminds me of Psalms 23 " He maketh me to lie down in green pastures"; While standing there, a large sphere of light came through the air, and as it came near, each of us fell to the ground and worshipped. Somehow this sphere of light was a manifestation of one way Gods form appears.

Another time; Jesus brought me to the mansion they were building for me. As He led me down these stairs, I was very amazed at the beautiful woodwork of the banister coming down the stairs. He leads me over to a wall, where they were making designs of wood trim on the wall, and asked me what I thought, if I liked it. I replied, I would like the wall to have a big painting of a country side with trees and a field and a stream, and, explained the detail of how I would like the frame to look. then He brought me back.

Another time, I was taken into a part of heaven, where there was a stage kind of area; It was like 3/4 of a circle to the open area, and maybe 1/4 for the back of what was like a stage, but the whole area was like it had light coming from it to different levels. The outer edge was a circumference of steps, three levels of steps, and the steps had a level of light coming from them. On the platform of the stage, in the middle, was a cube podium. This cubic podium glowed light also, more so than the other areas, and was similar to marble, but light glowed from within, not like it had light like we make lights, but like it had life in it to always show this inward light. I was led of one of the people or angels, whatever they were, over to the podium of light, and told that I was created to look into the book that sits on the cube of light. No one can look into that book on that podium unless they are brought up to look into it. As I was led over, I looked into the book; It was a book of light. The brightness in the book also eminated from the book into you, was brighter than any other part around. It was pure light. There was not a written language in the book like books on earth, there was a type of writing in it, and when you look into it you knew what it meant, even though there is no writings like these in any language on earth; But looking into the book of light; Revelation is opened to you, understanding and comprehension is revealed to you. On earth, no one has an idea what comprehension and revelation and disclosure and understanding is compared to what you see when looking into the book of light in heaven. The greatest ability of knowledge on earth from the most educated or wise people on earth are but dim tiny bits of clues compared to the type of full knowledge you see in that book. Even now, in my earthy body, even though I have seen into that book, there is no way to retain the level of understanding in this world, as we are today, in this unchanged body; But it has given me an edge because of the humility it causes, to be reverent, and remain open to God, no matter how great or deep a revelation seems to be revealed to me here on earth in this mortal body. This is a key to being able to hear beyond what can be tradition or well accepted doctrine; This kind of humility.
Thinking about this; I compare two different times in my life in Christ; In my first year being dedicated to follow, after the near death out of body experience, in 1982; There was the time that God opened a window of heaven, and seeing into the eternity of the endlessness of forever, I had experiened a ruin in my body and mind because of the measure of power and knowledge that natural man can not bear.
Then in 1999, while living in our trailer in Phoenix Arizona, after being up all night travailing in very heavy prayer and in worship to God; There was opened to me, like I was in a conduit of connection between the knowledge in Glory, while in this earthy tabernacle, my body; Now, either it was just differnt in type of anointing, or I have been changed that much; Because this time, I was not in ruin, but in total amazment and astonishment of the knowledge being poured upon me; All I could do for hours after that was walk back and forth in the trailer, saying, "I never knew that, I never knew that" over and over and over. Even now I can not describe or explain what it was or what it was like when that conduit was opened upon me to heaven; And I do not retain a very clear concept of it other than, it was so marvelous, and so far beyond what any human can imagine or conceive in our mind on our own, infinity times beyond any ability we could ever imagine. God is SO Good !

Please go to my other banners and buttons, to read about the times I have had Gods ministering Spirits come to me, and things He has revealed to me.

It is carnal to compare yourselves among yourselves; but I need to bear record, similar to comparing Spiritual with Spiritual, which is Spiritual, when it is for your understanding;
As free in Christ; I bear witness as how I have seen Jesus; How He brought me to the heavens to see my mansion, and other times taken to heaven, and tried to relate words that no person could bear to hear; Not unlike Paul told of in 2nd Cor 12; And as I told in other places in this site; Miracles are not uncommon in my ministry, as I give testamony to in these pages; Special revelations of needed truth for these times, as according to Faith and Grace, as is the apointment in Apostles; Also, as I heard the voice of the Spirit, and I had no motive to lie; being one called to minister without charge, as was the tradition of Paul.
In these things, I bear record of my calling as an Apostle and Prophet and teacher; even as I have known in the Spirit; And had reaffirmed by those with the gift of word of knowledge; which I also already knew beforhand, but God through them confirmed.

And all of this is not mentioned to any of my benifit, other than joy of your reception; I hope in your goodness; And work to that end; that you will preceive what is said without hardness of heart.

About my credentials as an Apostle
In the banner about Angels; The time I reffered to the Glorious Angel who showed up in front of me, with great glory of joy eminating from his face; Well, actually, that was no angel; It was Jesus!
I beheld the resurrected glorified Jesus looking directly at me face to face.
Having been with Jesus in person, is a required credential for being an Apostle, like how Jesus shown over Paul in a bright light, speaking to him, saying, "I am Jesus whom thou persecutest" .
The Apostle Paul said in 1st Corinthians 15:, how when Jesus raised from the grave, he first appeared to the twelve, then more than 500, then to James,then all the Apostles, last of all himself. I want to point out here, Paul refers to "all the Apostles" as being different people from the "12"; So the common thought that there were only 12 apostles plus Paul, is not correct. Next I want to point out, he said last was himself. Again, it is commonly misunderstood, as people think that there were never to be any apostle after Paul. That was not what Paul was saying. People just like to practice carnal exercizes of jumping to conclusions.
What we have here about this; Is, Every so many generations at least; There is need of Apostles and Prophets; God still put us 1st in the church, to establish truth that gets perverted, twisted ,watered down, misunderstood and not seen or not believed. To ground the truth of Him in us. But still, the Apostles and Prophets being 1st, are last, because we get persecuted by those who have advantage, because of position, and because of flesh, because Preachers do not like being instructed or corrected, because many preachers are carnal, no matter that they say very good things now and then.
Nevertheless; The work of an Apostle will continue to be done, and to those who have an ear that genuinely wants to hear, they will hear.

When I was about 16 years old, I was in the basement of a friend named Julie Wagner, whose whole family was into working clay, and they had a kiln.

I knew that I wanted to make a vivid crucifix with Jesus on the cross, but I had only done one work of clay before, in like 1st grade.
This was very important to me. I was very reverant, not wanting to make something that would not be glory to God; So I bowed my head and prayed for God to help me. As Soon as I did that, An extreemly loud clap of thunder blasted right outside the wall of that house; It shook the whole house, being just right outside the house.
I looked up from bowing my head, and was overwhelmed by the presence of the Spirit of God, who just thundered his answer to me. And I made the crucifix.
God has spoken to me this way several times.
The day I became totally sold out to Following Jesus, on January 1st, 1982; I had just heard the voice of the Lord say in reply to me, "Follow Me". I knew absolutly that was God. So audibly awsome and supreem and full of peace. Latter, as I read the gosples, and came to where Jesus said "follow me"; Then God made me to see, it was Jesus who spoke to me, saying "Follow Me". That is no less than how Jesus appeared to Paul; But, Jesus also showed up to me face to face the time I thought before it was an Angel, with Glory of great joy like light beaming from his face. But yesterday, on 12/18/04, as I was being led in the Spirit to go over all the powerful events of God revealing to me; I was made to understand that it was not an angel, but Jesus. To this day, I know I shall Never forget that face looking straight into mine; such glory, such splendor, such power of life. That was when I was led in bible study to see, by proper understanding of the words, that God is a Trinity.
The time I was taken to heaven in spirit, and saw God as a Sphere, and everyone fell down and worshipped him; I now recall how John said in Revelations 4:2 "one sat on the throne". That word "one" in the greek, is the word pronounced "al-lay'-lone" which means: a plural form, themselves.
That's like in the beginning, God said" Let us make man in our image"
But let me get back to this topic of my calling as Apostle. You can read about "what God is in the "trinity" link.
Miracles; that is a sign Apostles do. I bear witness in this site, of miracles God worked through me all my life, even more after being established in this calling, and even recent miracles. You can read about those in the "Miracles" page.
This other sign, that Paul did not place in his conversation directly about this seal, but did mention it; He would come to "revelations" This same thing is exactly what began in me from the beginning of the time, when I heard Jesus say audibly "follow me". These revelations are the teachings I bring forth in this site.
I heard from the early 80's, about 84, that I am to minister "faith and grace"
At around 1993, while painting a house in Tulsa Oklahoma; While I was a member of Christ's Disciples Motorcycle Ministry, I heard the Lord tell me not to call myself Christ's Disciple, for I am "Christ's Apostle"; And told me I had "esoteric teachings" . I didnt know what that word esoteric meant. But now I know, God was telling me I had teachings of true understanding that reveals faith and grace, which is hindered by traditional doctrines contrary to faith and grace. You can see one example in the "tithing" button.

Again; I do not put forth describing my credentials as an Apostle to promote me. I am totally the oposit of such things. I reveal these things so that you, the hearer, or reader, will be able to comprehend what manner of man you are reading from; To the extent that Faith can enter your spirit, if you hear from God in your spirit that what I say is true, and so you can expect to be able to hear the teachings as from God, and be able to see the truth and walk in it.

It would not be unexpected for any true beliver to question these things I testify. Maybe you ask; How can Jesus appear to you or anyone, it says he will return in power and great glory, and that if anyone say lo here or lo there or he is in the desert or a secret place, dont belive or follow them?
True, But that is referring to the return of Jesus, when he appears in the clouds with his angels . That event is a global event. What I am talking about is a very small event, where Jesus appears to only a small group of people or just one person.
You must be wise about these things; Take caution about anyone who does not come with grace and judgement, mercy and faith, and contradicting the bible; A genuine called of God modern Apostle must also bring clearification of truth popularly gone wrong in understanding. A true Prophet/Apostle of God not only maginfies mercy, faith and grace, and brings revelation; But also righteousness and holiness.
Anyone who tells you things "contrary" to the new testament scriptures, or says Jesus is already here in some place, they are false. Anyone who claims to be Gods Apostle or Prophet and says you are to give them your money and give up you marriage partner, or give your partner to that so called prophet; Is is foul spirit! No man of God permits sin, and is himself free of practicing any sin, though sin is in our mortal body.
Remember; When I said I saw Jesus? Face to face! When Jesus showed up to Paul on the road to Damascus, Paul only saw a light shine round about him; And those with Paul saw no man but heard the voice that spoke to Paul saying "I am Jesus whom thou persecutest" .
Paul saw a light that spoke to him saying he was Jesus; I saw Jesus looking straight into my face by his face. It may be that I saw his face and Paul didnt, because I was already saved and filled with the Holy Spirit; Paul was neither.

The first 11 Apostles, before they were Filled with the Spirit, cast lots to fill Judas seat. But after they were Spirit Filled, they never cast lots again. And you never hear of Matthias again; God is the one who filled Judas bishoprik, not lot casting; Paul is the replacment of Judas, not Matthias.
I learned to see the difference, being called and chosen and appointed and ordained of GOD! God did not call me to be ordained by men in ministry; there is a place for it, like when the presbytery, which is ordained of God and not man, lays on hands and has a prophetic utterance; But an Apostle is not called of man, though God can utter the prophecy through holy men, through the gift of the word of knowledge; But the Apostolic calling must be ordained of God, so just because it is spoken by people it is not valid unless it is of God: And, God will perform the credentials, and reveal Jesus in a supernatural way, and show that person the work of an Apostle to be done; To establish churchs.
It is common thought among believers, that only by being "under" another ministry, can one be ordained. Jesus referred to one who did not follow him like the 12, he said "Forbid him not: for there is no man which shall do a miracle in my name, that can lightly speak evil of me"
Ministers can be like those cheif priests and elders who came saying "By what authority doest thou these things? And who gave thee this authority?" When the true authority is like what Jesus said to Pilate "Thou couldest have no power at all against me, except it were given thee from above"
This is the same way it is for Apostolic authority; Like Paul said in Gal 1:16&17 "I conferred not with flesh and blood: Neither went I up to Jerusalem to them which were apostles before me" See, an apostle must have their own personal dirrect calling from God himself; Not that an apostle will not hear people, but that the calling is authorized from above. And the calling from God may differ somewhat from most others, like Jesus first apostles were instructed to "baptize" ; But Paul said "Christ sent me not to baptize" And there are doctrines which claim you must be baptized in order for your sins to be removed; Or, that you must be baptized saying the name of Jesus, or saying other things in certain ways, causing fear in the church, not faith; But those are only small views from men who are not well enough illuminated by the Spirit, and trouble people with their small views. God is greater than any sect or denominational doctrine; God is God, and can call and ordain and instruct his servants to work as He sees fit. I hope this somewhat free's your mind from carnal controlling people who want to enslave you ignorantly to and by their fleshy minds, even if they be somewhat Spiritual.

I do not desire to be anything special; I always was one to cut myself out of pride and things like that, even in the natural. Even as a Spirit filled minister, if a tv camera was rolling nearby, even of my own ministry, I would not step up unless asked; Unless God so leads me, I do not do anything in a ministry, unless I am placed in a position where it is my job to do it. If my job is to minister, I am never shy or afraid, even though I fear in the sense, I highly reverence the responsibility of effecting the eternity of souls who hear.
It is my hope, that when you read this website, you become convinced by the Spirit that what I say is true.That God surely did make me an apostle of faith and grace of righteousness; to the ability to receive my words as from God, in the Spirit. These things are for your good.

HOME


Discuss Spiritual Truth