You said it was true
I believed you when you said so
And now I still do
But that was long ago
Much time has passed
Yet I still count the days
Since I saw you last
I opened my heart to you
I let you peek inside
I removed my mask
From you, I didn't hide
Then you vanished
Gone in an instant
My heart is still with you
My love, I won't recant
I think of you each day
Each passing moment seems forever
Until we meet again
Until we are...together...
With bits and pieces of pain
It's only the moments with you
Which keep me sane
I always wish
Wish upon that star
That I could be with you
Wherever you are
My memories...
My dear memories of you
The sweetest thing ever
From here to the moon
I wish I could hold you
In my arms so tight
Forever and ever
Throughout the night
But all I have to hold
Are these lovely, old memories
So I hold them close to my heart
I can bear to live because of these
Falling down in the sand
I remember showing off
Standing out of the crowd
I remember being with her
Always grasping the moment
Wanting to put my arm around her
But knowing it could never be
I remember hugging her goodbye
But never wanting to let go
Wanting to hold her tight
But the miles tore us apart
I remember, I remember
Oh, the blissful memories...
I remember, I remember
Because it's all I can do
For me, this is the millionth time
Penny for your thoughts
Yet I always give a dime
Shouldn't it get easier?
These heartbreaks of mine
And yet it hurts each time
From heart to mind to spine
What's the point of love?
What's that painful, stupid reason?!?
I'm sick of all the crap
To my heart, it's only treason
It consumes its victims with bliss
Dissolving away their fears
Then it leaves them cold and alone
Bitter and empty for many years
Is it all even worth it?
I don't know for sure
But that luscious thought of love
Makes a very temptatious lure...
The clouds roll onward
Life has returned
The elephant, mouse, and bird
The quiet is filling
Hanging heavy in air
Nature treats its wounds
A vessel ready for repair
I stand here in awe
As life begins anew
The future remains uncertain
I don't know what to do
But these woods are but a stage
Now I see the light
I am the lead role
My exit...stage right
An awesome music collection
As far as clothes are concerned
I've got a fat selection
My Nintendo is da bomb
And my lava lamp's too cool
I have a loving family
With tons of friends at school
With this, a boy'd be happy
He'd always have something to do
Yet I feel something's missing
That something...is you
All this stuff is wonderful
This materialistic zoo
But I'd trade it all in
Just to be with you
And all the men and women merely actors,
Then I must pause
For what am I?
Am I supporting actor
Who helps others get along?
Am I in the chorus
With no real mind of my own?
Am I the villian
But not aware of my evil?
Perhaps I am an extra
Used and tossed away.
I could be the lead
Who always gets his woman
Anyway, I'm happy
At least I'm out on stage...
That I could tuck you out of sight
Perhaps I might move on
And party away the night
I thought I would finally be happy
And have a girl of my own
One to hold and hug and kiss
One to talk with on the phone
Yet, I find myself dreaming of you
And wishing to see you again
Oh, I was in bliss for a time
But now I'm back to the pain
Why are you still here?
I thought I gave you up
So here I wait in my misery
Waiting with my empty cup
Why so full of hate?
I don't believe in that stuff
That stuff people call fate
Then people were meant to be killed
Slaughtered on a specific date
War and murder and rape would only be so
Because some cruel hand wrote it that way
Decided the innocent should suffer
On a certain time and day
That a boy should be ripped to shreds
Only because he was destined to be gay
Such an angry world out there
Which is fed by its own fear
Its sick mind all twisted in knots
Drunk on blood as if it were beer
At times I feel it has infected me
That I have taken on its ghastly leer
But I don't believe in fate
As I have said before
Instead, I believe in hope
As it taps lightly on one's door
Without it, what's the point
Of living on...and evermore?
Its contents a mystery
Just like a giant box
Labeled "Don't Open 'Til Christmas"
So here I wait
Hypnotized like a child
If love is just a rollercoaster,
Where do I get off?
The only thing scarier than t he heights
Is the sudden drop which follows
Plummeting to the rock bottom
Love hurts once again
If I'm just a nobody,
And nobody's perfect,
Why am I so far from it?
Maybe it's because I fell so far,
Fell from that absurd rollercoaster
All for opening a package...
That pain deep down inside
That horrible, abject beast within
Which makes you wish you had died
Your are not alone in this
For I have felt it too
Just so that you know
My heart goes out to you
Just try to remember
Recall a good, old time
When you couldn't help but laugh
And the entire world was sublime
Think of all the wonderful things
That happened in your life
And of the less fortunate
Who never got breaks from strife
Things will be better soon
You will no longer need to mope
Trust me on this one,
You just gotta have hope...
I miss your beautiful face
A glimpse of heaven
Your eyes are so blue
I could fall in their abyss
Dive into their pool
Te amo, chica
Pero tu no estas aqui
Yo falto a ti
Confusion set in
I've twisted myself up so far,
Twisted myself over you
Now, I don't know what to do
I don't know if I'm happy
But I'm not completely sad
I cried for the first time,
First time in all these years
Flowing gently are these tears
I don't know who to like
Or what to do about you
I wonder if I'll ever be normal
I wish I was normal again
Now, all I have is this silly pen
Each, of course wants the other one dead
Trapped in the center, I watch it all
As the beastly forms battle within my head
The sheep wants peace
Seeks what is good for all
It speaks out to me
Filling the air with harmonious call
The serpent is clever and sly
Tempting me with ploys with no chagrin
Seeking chaos and my own destruction
Its root is evil...or simple sin
The two battle onward
But I can do nothing
I am powerless to help,
So I sit here watching...
Making my teary eyes burn
The acrid stench of salt
Repulsive in my nostrils
Off in the distance,
Far over the horizon
There lies home, a lifetime away
The deafening crash
Of breaking waves
Mighty with their tall, white crowns
This enchanting place...
This view of such beauty
A treasure to any
Yet grooves carve into the sand
Between my nestled feet
Grooves cradling tear drops
Nothing is beautiful anymore
All ugly...all dead...
Where did it all go?
It ran off with my heart...
I love to eat food
Checking the refridge
Or hunting down snacks
I have a goateed friend
We eat together
And we are often scared
I hate rats
In any shape or size
I wish I had
Something to eat...
Who am I?
Hurtling down upon me
Striking with hot force
The wind is strong and vicious
It threatens me
Challenging my very existence
Humming lightly just barely audible
I can feel its vibrations
Moving the metal beneath me
Every step is peril
The roof is daunting
My life in its hands
Every moment I'm in danger
Yet I don't care
For here I feel free
The wind blows away my masks
The sun burns down the barriers
Fake identities fall through the cracks
Up here I am happy
I can be me
They think I'm a freak
Just an outcast
Labelled as weird
All for being me
They don't comprehend the pain
The pangs of loneliness
Stabbing deeply in my heart
Making me bleed
Slowly I'm dying
But not a normal death
Shall I endure
Not one of mortal measure
Instead of spiritual passing
My insides slowly decaying
These things aren't "normal"
Whatever that is...
So I hide them down deep
And wear my mask of bliss
Simply a cloth hiding a wound
No one knows me
At least not the hurt
Sure they know my wit and humor
But no one knows my yearning
My dreams to be complete...
To come scoop me out
Everyone thinks I'm nutty
My sanity, they doubt
But I can't help myself
I can't shake these feelings
I need to be with you
And all your grape peelings
Sure, I had a short fling
A meal or two with jam
But it's you I want
For you know who I am
I miss you so much
I miss your gooey face
That fruity, purple smile
With crispy, breaded lace
Than came that dreadful day
I had to part from you, Jelly
Because a big, hungry mouth
Said, "Get in my belly!"
Bliss, happy
Filling, crushing, obsessing
Can be hurtful
Lust
Sleep
Splendid, magnificent
Laying, dreaming, rejuvenating
My favorie pastime
From head to toe
Slowly freezing my soul
My heart, frozen black
Unfeeling anymore
Numb to the touch
No tears, no smiles
Nothing...
I cannot move anymore
I can't go back
That way is blocked
I can't go forward
For there is no bridge
Just a bottomless hole
So here I am standing
Unmoving, just cold
If I move
I plummet
So, so cold...
Large, spotted
Eats, moos, milks
It's what's for dinner
Beef
Pig
Muddy, fat
Eats, bathes, oinks
The other white meat
Pork
That bond between two people
Common interests a-plenty
The only ones who understand
That feeling you get
When you hear from an old friend
One long gone
You can't help but be happy
Even if you've forgotten them,
You don't miss them anymore
Just seeing them
Makes you crack a smile
You realized how much
Just how much you missed them
Even when you didn't know it
Three cheers to old friends!
This talk about normal
One of the few words I hate
So sterile and formal
Normal is an arbitrary view
Meaning different for you and me
It's something everyone else is
But I will never be
Average is merely a label
Used to exclude others
To be used out of fear
To hate one's sisters and brothers
You laugh because I'm different
I laugh because you're all the same
It's originality that reigns supreme
All that normal crap...is lame
So what if my heart is broken?
Who cares if love is lost?
The stars are still out shining
The sun will rise again
At least there's always tomorrow
To start all over once more
So what if I'm rejected
Just tossed away like trash
The earth continues revolving
And hope can spring abounding
For whatever happens today
Tomorrow t'will be past
And I ask, so what?
Fierce winds whipping
Gentle waves crashing on the beach
Up in the sky, the moon
Glowing brilliantly against the dark
Off in the distance
The soft call of birds
The beach stretches onward
In the endless blackness
Palm trees sway in the distance
He sits on his bed
His face unshaven
His eyes glowing red
His heart is full
Of anguish and sadness
His is spinning
Corrupted with madness
He lays awake
On many sleepless nights
Wishing for someone
To put out his lights
Then come the memories
Rushing back to him
Overwhelming his mind
His will to live grows dim
"Why me?" he moans
His question unanswered
Then taken by darkness
He's gone without a word...
A wonderous place to be
How I long for thee
Sleep
Darkness, blissful
Snoring, drooling, napping
My favorite hobby
Dreams
Goodnight, world
Sleep is upon me
I will be gone
Until morning it be
For as we all know,
Rest is what's key!
Disappearing day by day
Slowly I forget you
Yet, I wish you would stay
Let your aroma remain
Pungent with clarity
Of each passing moment
And forgetting a rarity
These feelings slip though
Tumbling through my fingers
No matter how tight I grasp
Only but little lingers
Why can't it seem like yesterday
Instead of months ago?
You were my world then
But now, I do not know
Please stay awhile
And reminisce with me
For often am I lonely
How I miss thee
I try so hard to remember
But it is no use at all
For memories can dissolve
Crushed by a wrecking ball
If only I could see you
So memories renew and stay
But I can't so I ask you
Please don't fade away...