also contains some offensive sterotypes
(first the opeaning song starts)
Narrator: Ash and Misty have fianilly made it to Pewter City but before they do anything they need somewere to rest
Ash: damnet i'm tired lets find somewere to sit down (Misty spots some large rocks)
Misty: how about we sit on those rocks?
Ash: ok as long as you be sure to sit on the same rock as me..
Misty: whatever i'm too tired to argue right now (they sit down and a myseterious man appears)
man excuse me but that will be $100 for sitting on my rocks
Ash: why the @#$! should i have to pay to fit down on rocks?
man: because there my rocks and it's $100 to sit and $500 to buy one
Ash: who the hell are you anyway?
man: my name is Flint who might you be?
Ash: i'm Ash Ketchem i plan to be a pokemon master and enslaver
Flint: a trainer well then i'm sure you would want to battle with the Pewter city gymleader
Ash: what's the point of a gym battle?
Flint: in order to participate in the pokemon league you must earn and/or steal eight or more gym badges
Ash: oh were the hell is the gym here?
Flint: right over there (points straight to the left)
Ash: oh
Flint: but before that you fhould go to the pokemon center next door to the gym your Pikachu looks like it may faint any minute
Ash : oh don't worry Pikachu's allways like that it's because he's very high (pulls out some playpoke magazenes)
Pikachu: pika (grabs the magazenes and starts looking at the pictures)
Ash: hey let me see (Pikachu opens one of those three page pictures of a naked Jigglypuff) whoo who common lets go to the center
Flint: arent you forgeting about the money you owe me?
Ash: aw crap listen i don't have that kind of money
Flint: oh don't you worry i was joking about it costing $100 to sit down it's on me this time (Ash and Misty go inside the center, Ash gives his pokemon to the Nurse Joy)
Nurse Joy: your pokemon will be healthy in a few minutes until then the two of you should go to the resterant in the center
Ash: say werent you at veriden city?
Joy: oh that must be one of my cousans you see i'm a Chaldean and have a million cousans and there all named Nurse Joy same for Officer Jennyes
Ash: oh just don't have them all try to gang up on me and try beating me up
Joy: oh don't worry only the male Chaldeans do that
Ash: oh what a relief (Ash and Misty go in resterant and start eating) so Misty do you have any clue what kind of pokemon this gym leader has?
Misty: i think the gym leader relies on rock type pokemon and since you have two flying types and an eletric drug addict your screwed
Ash: oh ya we'll see about that and if i beat this gym leader you must have sex with me when ever i want you to condom free
Misty: fine but that still wont count as a way of paying for my bike and if you lose i rip off your balls
Ash: fine by me because it won't happen (Misty goes to wait in the front lobby and a waiter gives Ash his bill) oh great leave me with the bill lets see (bill reads to say $5,000) what the hell (Ash starts running out)
Waiter: hey come back here (chases Ash out to the lobby)
Ash (running): common Misty run for it
Misty: comming (starts running with Ash out of the pokemon center) i think we lost them
waiter (from distance): F***in kids i'll get you for this
Ash: damn that was close hey the cost is clear lets go to the gym (they go into the gym) hello is there a gym leader here cause i'm here to kick your ass
leader: my name is Brock i'm the gym leader and i assure you you're the one who will get your ass kicked
Ash: and why the hell do you say that?
Brock: your Pikachu it's very high, it can't win
Ash: who are you to judge i want to beat you right now and after that, Misty prepare to get naked
Misty: only if you win because if you lose then you can say goodbye to your balls
Brock: wait Ash are you saying that if you win that the girl has to strip naked for you?
Ash: yah why?
Brock: because i like to see naked girls
Misty: even if i were to strip how will you be able to see me naked when your eyes are allways closed?
Brock: there not closed they look that way because i'm african-asian and we all know that asians allways keep there eyes closed but can still see anyway
Ash: thats true and since you're african that means your good at basketball right
Brock: i can't deny that when it comes to da hoop i rock da house cause i'm pimpin the basketball court and the pokemon gym i kick ass there to so lets get started
Ash: whatever lets go (they head to a battle full of rocks all over and Misty is above them watching the battle) hey Misty before i start will you show me your boobs once for good luck?
Misty: *sigh* very well (pulls her shirt up and down quickly showing her boobs for a mere second) there happy now?
Ash and Brock: do it again do it again
Misty (loudly): no (quiletly to herself) perverts
Ash: lets just start the battle
Brock: very well Onix go (throws a pokeball and a giant rock snake appears)
Onix: roar
Ash: Pikachu kick his ass
Pikachu: pika (why the hell should i?)
Ash: because if you do i have a pack of marabolo lights for you if go out there and win
Pikachu: pika (very well)
Brock: Onix use bide attack now (Onix wraps around Pikachu and tries to sufficate it)
Ash: aw damnet Pikachu use thunder shock now (Pikachu tries to shock Onix but it has no effect on him what so ever) crap pikachu return (Ash tries to return Pikachu into the pokeball but Onix's body blocks Pikachu from being returned)
Brock: alright Onix send Pikachu to hell
Ash: stop i give up you win
Brock: very good choice to stop Onix return (Brock returns Onix to his pokeball) mabey we will have a rematch when you are ready
Ash: thanks Brock (heads back to the center to heal then runs from the enraged waiter again and runs into Flint) (and as for Misty she aggreed to give him a second chance doubble or nothing to keep his balls)
Flint: so Ash how did your battle with Brock go?
Ash: he kicked my ass hard, how could someone be so violent?
Flint: allow me to show you something (takes Ash to a house and there looking inside and find Brock taking care of a bunch of little kids)
Ash: is that Brock taking care of a bunch of kids? why, does he run a daycare or something?
Flint: no those are his brothers and sisters he's the oldest of them and has to take care of all them
Ash: but were are the parents?
Flint: you see their mother divorced their father and after that she was given the responsibility but she had to make money to suppport everyone and had to make a living as a stripper and pretty soon she started taking drugs and alcohol and now she has completly forgotten about them and last they heard she had to flee the country while the father who was supposed to take care of them after their mother diched them ended up abandening them for no good reason at all
Ash: man that father must be a real loser
Flint: he he ya he is quite the loser but anyway even though you lost i think i know a way to make Pikachu stronger
Ash: i alredy give Pikachu steroids
Flint: i ment a way other then using illegal drugs i mean by overpowering his body with electricty
Ash: how the hell do we do that?
Flint: we must use the power of the water mill to generate power
Ash: great lets go (they head to the water mill) wait weres the water?
Flint: well aperently the water has dried up so for right now you'll have to push the mill by foot
Ash: no problem (plugs it to pikachu and starts moving the mill)
Pikachu: pika (this hurts stop it)
Ash: i know it hurts but it's the only way (contunes to push and pikachu contunues to swear at Ash) Pikachu your almost done (the power meater hits the top and Pikachu faints from the sudden power boost) you did it Pikachu now lets get some rest (they sleep at the center which by the way the waiters forgot about Ash) *yawn* (Ash falls asleap) (next morning) Pikachu wake up it's time to kick Brocks ass
Pikachu: pi pikachu (lets kill that pervert)
Ash: great lets go comon Misty
Misty: i'm comming
Ash: good cause when i beat Brock you will be my sex slave
Misty: i'm not worried (they go to the gym)
Ash: oh Brock i'm here for the rematch
Brock: good cause i'm ready oh by the way do you mind if all my brothers and sisters watch to
Ash: i don't give a damn more people to watch you get your ass kicked (they head to the battle field)
Brock: 2 on 2 ok with you?
Ash: fine by me
Brock: Geodude go (a Geodude appears)
Geodude: Geodude Geodude
Ash: Pidgeotto i choose you (Pidgeotto pops out of the ball)
Pidgeotto: pidgot pidgot
Brock: Geodude rock throw now (Geodude hurls rocks at Pidgeotto who falls down in a mess of blood)
Ash: damnet Pidgeotto return (Pidgeotto returns to the pokeball) Pikachu your turn
Brock: ha ha you think that thing can shock my Geodude ha Geodude use tackle
Ash: Pikachu use thundershock now (before Geodude gets cloce enough to Pikachu Pikachu shocks Geodude and Geodude faints)
Brock: so you've gotten stronger good for you Geodude return (Brock return Geodude) Onix go
Onix: roar
Ash: Pikachu thunder shock him
Pikachu: pika-chuuu (shocks Onix but does little but some damage)
Ash: damn wait i know Pikkachu shock the ceiling near the fire spreanklers (Pikachu does so and a small fire starts which the sprinklers put out and cover the gym with water)
Onix: rooooaaaarrrr
Brock: Onix no
Ash: now Pikachu shock it again (Pikachu does so and Onix falls down)
Brock: well you win so heres your badge
Ash: Brock i can't accept it i wouldn't have won if it wasn't for the fact that i made the sprinklers go off i cheated common Misty my balls are yours to rip off (they head out when Brock catches up with them)
Brock: Ash wait
Ash: what is it Brock?
Brock: you forgot your badge you have earned it fair and square
Ash: well ok thanks and Misty your now my sex slave (Flint comes running up) oh Flint it's you guess what i won
Flint: yes i know i saw everything now i have a confession to make (pulls off his face mask)
Brock: my father
Ash: Flint you're Brocks lazy father?
Flint: yes and Brock i want you to go fulfill your dreams i'll take care of the kids for you
Brock: great then theres some things to know
Flint: ok i'm ready (pulls out notepad and pencil)
Brock: ok now first is that Johney often tries to go on to porno sites so he will need to be watched while he's on the computer and (contunues to list thing to know)
Flint: uh i think i will be able to figure this all out
Ash: say Brock would you like to join us we will get to see lots of naked girls and stuff
Brock: sure thing but one question why is that girl always following you?
Misty: thats because you owe me a new bike to replace the one you broke
Ash: lets run
Brock: right behind you (they run and Misty chaces them)
Narrator: and so with Brock joining them will these losers succed? find out next time
to be contunued