Title: Remembrance - the AU version

 

Author: Henrika

 

Pairing: Viktor/Lucian

 

Rating: A strong R for this chapter for mature themes (not erotica). Over-all rating: NC.17

 

Summary: What if Lucian had (successfully) escaped with Viktor instead of killing him?

 

Disclaimer: I don’t own the characters, and I’m making no money from writing this. Please don’t sue.

 

Notes: This story is the AU version of the drabble “Remembrance”. The beginning is exactly the same, and the story breaks off just before Lucian kills Viktor and heads into another direction.

 

 

Chapter 1

 

“Don’t leave me here, Lucian… Don’t let them take me… please?”
 
The last word made the ...stoic Lycan’s face fall. “Viktor… If I continue to carry you, we’ll both get caught…” Lucian murmured ruefully while kneeling on the ground with the wounded Vampire’s head on his lap. Viktor had been shot twice in the chest, and while neither gunshot wound was directly fatal, a bullet had shattered the Elder’s spine just below the ribcage, leaving him paralysed from the waist down.
 
The Lycan’s keen hearing could already grasp the sounds of human snipers moving through the forest toward them. They were close. Very little time was left.
 
Viktor gazed up at his lover, pain and hurt clouding his beautiful, sky-blue eyes. “I know,” he simply said.
 
“I can’t.” Lucian shook his head. “You know I can’t.”
 
“You must,” the Elder rasped, and small rivulet of blood trickled from the corner of his mouth. “You know what they will do to me. You know you don’t have a choice. Just do it!”
 
Lucian just continued to silently shake his head and pulled Viktor’s upper body tighter into his arms. The fallen Vampire’s right hand clutched his shoulder spasmodically. The strength in the hold almost made the Lycan grimace. Even in this condition, Viktor was breathtakingly strong.
 
The sounds caused by their hunters kept coming closer. They were probably less than 600 meters away. The two immortals had two minutes at the very most.
 
“Viktor, don’t talk like that…” Lucian whispered, fervently trying to find a solution to an insoluble problem. “They can fix you up, and then we can run away from them…”
 
“Are you going to force me to beg?” the Vampire asked wearily, interrupting the Lycan’s rambling. They both knew that Lucian was only fooling himself.
 
One minute and forty seconds…
 
He held Viktor firmly to his chest and looked into the other’s eyes. The Elder’s strength was fading, but his mind was still as clear as ever. “Tell me about the time when we went to your cottage in the mountains. Just you and I,” Lucian said in a thick voice and tried to smile. “Remember?”
 
Viktor smiled as well. “To get away from everything… The Coven believed that I was going away in ...business. That’s what I told them, and they never had a reason to doubt me.”
 
“No ruling, no obligations. Only freedom.”
 
One minute and twenty seconds…
 
“No one to reward or to punish…” Viktor said. “Just a place where I could be myself and stay in bed as long as I wanted with---”

 

“Viktor, I can’t,” Lucian interrupted, tears seeping from his eyes. The Elder was asking the impossible of him. He couldn’t possibly just execute the helpless Vampire - his lover - like some wounded animal! And *how* was he supposed to kill Viktor? Snap his neck? Grow claws and slit his throat? Lucian wasn’t even wearing his wrist-blade, so he’d have to use his hands, one way or another.

 

It was out of question. Neither his heart nor his body would comply. Leaving Viktor to the humans and run to save his own skin was out of question, as well, so that only left one option. He’d have to take the Elder with him.

 

“Hurry!” Viktor hissed frenziedly. “You don’t have much time! They’re coming, and if you’re still here when they do, they’ll catch you!”

 

“No, they won’t,” Lucian replied steadfastly. He knew exactly what to do now. He would transform into his bestial shape and run off with Viktor in his arms. Being stronger and faster than as a human, he could carry Viktor and still have a chance of making it. And the humans didn’t have dogs with them, so they wouldn’t be able to track his scent.

 

Lucian gently lowered Viktor’s head to the ground and stood up. The Elder gazed anxiously up at him. Clearly Viktor wondered what he had in mind.

 

One minute…

 

“I’m going to transform,” Lucian told him. “Then I’ll carry you and run off. I won’t be able to talk once I’ve done it, so I just thought I’d let you know. Don’t be frightened.”

 

Lucian tore off his jacket and threw it onto the ground before he willed the transformation to begin. It wasn’t full moon now, so it would take a lot more focus. His eyes shifted first, becoming ice-blue, and then his canines appeared, elongating until they almost reached his bottom lip. The Lycan’s vision changed as well, becoming both sharper and blurry at the same time. Bones shifted from their usual position, muscles bulged, and clothes were torn, Lucian’s whole body growing at least a foot and putting on a fair amount of additional mass. At last the coarse fur grew out all over his hulking shape, and the transformation was complete.

 

Viktor stared at his lover’s bestial form with a mixture of dismay, worry, and fear. No matter how much he loved and trusted Lucian, he did not fully trust this… side of him. A changed Lycan would always cause disdain in him. It was a natural and unconscious reaction.

 

Lucian was slightly discouraged when he bent down to scoop the Elder into his arms and Viktor cowered from him. His wolven muzzle could not form words, but he hoped that his body language and actions would tell Viktor that he wasn’t going to hurt him. As gently as he could, he lifted the wounded Vampire from the ground and urged Viktor to put his arms around his neck.

 

//Hold on to me tight…//

 

Lucian’s senses were even sharper in this shape, and he heard the humans as though they were only a few feet away. There was no time to lose. With a firm hold on Viktor’s injured frame, he darted off into the forest once more, now able to move at a speed his human shape never allowed.

 

Along with his appearance, Lucian’s mind had become somewhat more “primal” in his Lycan form, but he still knew very well that Viktor was wounded and needed medical attention. They also needed to get somewhere safe. A place where the humans wouldn’t look for them. The town was out of question -- the word on them was probably out already, so the military would be looking for them there, too.

 

Lucian growled. They had shot Viktor! Wounded him and maybe even crippled him permanently. It was not fair. They had shot him simply because of what he was.

 

After running almost blindly for over half an hour, Lucian stopped to catch his breath. He pricked up his ears but could no longer grasp the sounds of the humans. For the first time since the escape, he looked down at the Vampire in his arms. Viktor had lost consciousness at some point. He was very pale -- an indication that he’d lost a lot of blood and needed to drink. Lucian’s fur was a tangled mess of small sticks and leaves, and while it had been protecting the Lycan’s skin, Viktor had not been as fortunate. The Elder had received some scratches to his face and neck, caused by the vegetation.

 

Lucian wailed and gently flicked his tongue over Viktor’s nose tip. To his surprise, the Vampire responded with a small moan.

 

//Viktor? Are you conscious? It’s me, Lucian. We’re safe now… I think. At least I can’t hear them anymore. How are you feeling? Will you make it?//

 

The Lycan wished he could have spoken the words out loud, but he couldn’t, so he had to be satisfied with thinking them.

 

Lucian continued onwards, although he started walking instead of running. They desperately needed a roof over their heads. The sun would rise in just a few hours, and when it did, Viktor needed to be indoors.

 

Finally some luck! the Lycan thought when he found a small, dark, and seemingly desolate cabin in the middle of the forest. Its being dark didn’t automatically mean it wasn’t habited; maybe the owners were simply asleep. Not wanting to commit yet another fatal mistake, Lucian sniffed the air carefully and did his best to look inside through the dusty windows.

 

He could neither smell nor see any human presence and trusted his instincts enough to go through with this. The door was locked, but it was no match for a fully changed Lycan. Once inside, Lucian decided to change back. There wasn’t enough space for his Lycan shape in here, and hands were more practical than huge, clawed paws when it came to nursing and tending injuries.

 

The cold air caressed his now naked, bare body when the fur and the excess muscle vanished, and made him shiver. He sought out the bedroom - which wasn’t much bigger than a broom cupboard, really - and carried Viktor there, lowering him onto the small double bed. The Elder gave another weak moan when Lucian withdrew his arms, and the Lycan immediately grasped his cold, pale hand.

 

“Viktor?” Lucian whispered, happy to have his voice back. “Viktor, can you hear me? It’s alright now. We’re safe… you are safe.”

 

Viktor coughed in reply and slowly opened his watery, pain-filled eyes. The blood-loss had made him dizzy and nauseated, and he briefly wondered why he couldn’t feel his legs. Then he remembered. Of course. He’d been shot. In the back, through the spine. He was now paralysed from the waist down.

 

Lucian’s voice whispered his name, and a warm, strong hand was gripping his cold one. “Lu…cian…?” he slurred, turning his head to regard his lover, but the injuries had made him groggy and blurred his eyesight. All he saw now were unclear outlines.

 

“I’m here,” Lucian soothingly replied. “And I won’t leave you.”

 

“Whe-- Where… are we?”

 

“A cabin somewhere in the woods. Don’t worry, it’s desolate, and they won’t find us here. Just relax.”

 

Viktor seemed to heed his words and breathed out a sigh of relief. His breathing sounded laboured, though, and that together with the blood on his lips made Lucian wonder if Viktor’s lung had been damaged.

 

“My dear, listen…” he began. “I have to take a look at your injuries. If a bullet is still inside, I have to get it out as soon as possible.”

 

Viktor shivered at the words. They didn’t have any surgical tools, so that meant that Lucian would have to dig the bullet, in case there was one, out with his claws.

 

Light… He needed light. Lucian fumbled for the switch, hoping that this little dirt-cabin at least had electricity. He found it, and after a few seconds the small night lamp hooked to the wall above the bed came to life. The light was dim, mostly because the bulb was covered in dust, but it would have to be enough. Lucian carefully began to remove Viktor’s blood-soaked clothing. Pulling the garments off one by one, he just dropped them in a heap on the floor. The pants were an obstacle, because the Elder was now unable to raise his hips to help Lucian remove them, so the Lycan, not wanting to waste any time, tore the fabric apart and pulled the pieces away from the Vampire’s body. Viktor could afford a pair of new pants, anyway.

 

When he had Viktor splayed out naked on the bed, Lucian could finally take a better look at the gunshot wounds. The bleeding had almost stopped, but the wounds would not start healing until Viktor got to feed.

 

“H--how does it… look?” the Elder asked anxiously.

 

Lucian frowned. “I’m not sure…” He needed to see if Viktor had any exit wounds in his back. If that were the case, he wouldn’t have to dig any bullets out and the wounds could begin to heal. Vampires healed quickly, so if only the Elder got his share of blood, he would make it.

 

Placing an arm around Viktor’s shoulders, the Lycan lifted him into a sitting position. He scanned the Elder’s face for signs of pain, but Viktor seemed pretty relaxed. Lucian couldn’t decide whether that was good or bad. The good news was that both bullets had gone clean through the Vampire’s body. The exit wounds in his back still bled, though, and Viktor couldn’t afford losing more blood.

 

“Are you in pain?” Lucian asked his lover.

 

Viktor’s head had fallen back against Lucian’s forearm, and he looked to be on the verge of passing out again. “I don’t feel much, actually…” he murmured. “Hurts… only when I breathe…”

 

That pretty much confirmed Lucian’s suspicions. Viktor’s right lung had been hit, or at least grazed. Well, it could have been worse, supposedly. The bullet could have pierced the Elder’s heart instead, which would have been the end of Viktor.

 

“Let’s see if I can bandage your wounds and stop the bleeding,” Lucian said and gently lowered Viktor down onto his back again. It crossed his mind that the Elder might no longer be able to sit up unaided, and it was a depressing thought.

 

He found an old, white cotton sheet in the closet next to the bed and tore it to stripes, using them to bandage the Vampire’s ribcage. Blood didn’t immediately soak through, and Lucian was pleased. Viktor didn’t complain about any pain, which was slightly more worrying. Maybe the nerve damage was more severe than Lucian had believed at first?

 

The bleeding had ceased, but Viktor was practically livid and nearly unconscious. If he didn’t get to drink ASAP, he risked going into shock. And if that happened, he might not last the night. The Lycan desperately tried to think of what to do. He could try to go after animals… but that would take too long, and besides it was risky for him to go outside now. No, he would simply have to give Viktor some of his own blood.

 

Lucian noticed that the Elder’s eyes were rolling up; a sign that he was losing consciousness. “Viktor… Viktor! No, you mustn’t fall asleep,” the Lycan said, tapping Viktor’s cheeks.

 

“I need… blood…” the Vampire rasped, his voice but a hoarse whisper.

 

“I know… Hang in, there… I’ll get you some.”

 

Lucian bounced up and prepared to rush into the kitchen, but when he turned to leave, Viktor reached out for him. “D-don’t leave me alo-ne, Lucian…” The Vampire’s voice held traces of fear and longing. Lucian firmly grasped Viktor’s outstretched arm and placed it on the Elder’s own stomach.

 

“I’m not going to leave you,” he said seriously. “Not ever. I’ll be back in a minute.”

 

The words seemed to calm Viktor, who sank back into the bed with his eyes closed. The Lycan made his way to the kitchen and started looking for a knife and some kind of jug or pitcher. Even a mug would do, provided that it was big enough. He found a small kitchen knife in one of the drawers and a large glass in the cabinet above the sink.

 

Since the virus carried in Viktor’s saliva was lethal to the Lycan, he couldn’t allow the Vampire to drink directly from his wrist. Lucian carefully sliced a small cut into the artery running through his forearm and let the blood pour into the glass. It was important that he didn’t sacrifice too much blood, or he would weaken himself. About four decilitres were enough. It was sufficient to start the healing process in Viktor, and he could always “donate” more later.

 

When he re-entered the bedroom, Viktor appeared to have fallen asleep. Lucian padded over to the bed and gently worked an arm in under his lover’s back, propping him up against the pillows.

 

“Drink,” he said and placed the glass at the Elder’s lips. Viktor was barely conscious, but his body craved the blood, and he drank until nothing was left. Lucian didn’t consider it necessary to tell Viktor where he’d gotten the blood, and in his current state, the Vampire wouldn’t care.

 

Lucian used his thumb to wipe a small droplet trickling down Viktor’s chin. “Good…” he whispered, stroking the other man’s tangled, blond hair. It didn’t take long before Viktor revived and the dreamy, confused look in his eyes was replaced by a steadier one. Some colour also crept back into his cheeks.

 

“Lucian…” he murmured, passing his eyes over the Lycan sitting on the edge of the bed. “You have no clothes…”

 

Lucian chuckled. “Well, neither do you,” he replied. “But that’s alright. I’ll find some in the evening.” He was comfortable with his nudity and hadn’t thought much about it until Viktor pointed it out. “We should get some sleep, anyway.”

 

After having covered the medium-sized bedroom window with thick blankets to keep the sunlight out, Lucian crawled into bed, pulling the Elder’s body into the curve of his own, and wrapped an arm around Viktor’s waist, very careful not to touch the bullet wound located there. Oh, well… Maybe Viktor had lost the feeling in that area as well.

 

The wounded Vampire fell asleep within minutes, and to Lucian’s relief, his breathing already sounded healthier. The Lycan himself was not far behind. He was always weary after a transformation, and this night’s events had been more than enough to exhaust him. The pillows and bedclothes smelled stale, but Lucian followed Viktor’s example and didn’t let it bother him.

 

When the dawn came, the small bedroom in the cottage was filled with soft, snoring sounds caused by the two immortals.

 

 

Chapter 2

 

Lucian got up a couple of hours before sunset and let the heavily sleeping Vampire remain where he was. Viktor’s breathing was no longer ragged and laboured but slow, calm, and even. It was a healing sleep that would do the Elder good.

 

The Lycan had done further exploring of the cabin and was even able to find some clothing for himself. All he found was a pair of worn-out jeans and an old, grey T-shirt with some kind of rock band symbol, but they would do for now. Lucian was hungry, but naturally, there was no food in the cabin. He’d have to go outside to get that. Also, Viktor needed blood… Lucian himself couldn’t donate more right now, though. It would weaken him too much, and he needed to stay strong in order to take care of the wounded Elder. He’d have to get the Vampire some animal blood later. If he went after cattle, people would grow suspicious, but surely he could find an elk, a deer, or some other wild animal in these woods?

 

Shortly after sundown, Lucian entered the bedchamber to have a look at Viktor. Now his lover was awake and opened his eyes when he heard Lucian’s approach. Viktor eyed the Lycan’s outfit with a somewhat puzzled frown, and Lucian chuckled self-consciously.

 

“It’s all I could find,” he said as an explanation. “Not really my style, but… Anyway, how are you feeling?” He sat down on the edge of the bed and smiled at the Vampire.

 

“I have been better…” Viktor murmured and pulled himself into a sitting position. He had to use his arms for leverage, and in his current state, the procedure made him grimace from exertion.

 

“Well, you’re alive, and that’s all that matters,” Lucian said gently, cupping Viktor’s cheek in his hand. The Elder was healing, alright. Fast. The scratches caused by sticks and branches yesterday had all but vanished from his face and neck. Now he’d have to take a look at the gunshot wounds as well.

 

“Can I examine you?” he asked, wanting Viktor to give his permission before he touched him.

 

“By all means…” The Elder lifted his arms and Lucian pulled the bedcovers down, exposing Viktor’s body to his gaze. The Lycan was pleased with what he saw. After removing the improvised bandages, he could see that the entrance wounds had closed nicely and new tissue was already forming around them. He touched the purplish wounds lightly with his fingertips.

 

“This looks good,” he stated, giving Viktor a brief smile. “You’re healing. In a way, you were lucky. This bullet could have pierced your heart. Does it still hurt when you breathe?”

 

Viktor almost snorted at Lucian’s statement about luck. He didn’t feel very “lucky”; not lying paralysed in a bed, unable to take care of himself or even tend to his own most basic needs. He was alive… but not much more than that.

 

“Only a little,” he said in reply to the question about breathing. “But I’m a fast healer, so don’t worry.”

 

“Oh, yes, I know you are,” Lucian said. “But now I think we should see how bad the spinal nerve damage is.” This was a delicate issue, and the Lycan tried to approach it carefully. Perhaps Viktor had not yet accepted his paralysis and was living in denial. If that were the case, he could respond violently to Lucian’s attempt to inform him about the situation.

 

But Viktor simply shrugged. “I already know I’m crippled,” he sighed. “What else is there to see?”

 

“Let’s see where you can still feel my touch, alright?”

 

Lucian began by lightly tapping the Elder’s left knee. “Can you feel this?”

 

Viktor shook his head. Lucian moved on to the Vampire’s thigh. “How about this?” Another headshake. He sighed. It was as he’d expected. The Elder’s whole lower body was numb. “How about this?” the Lycan asked, stroking Viktor’s rather prominent hipbone.

 

“Not a thing,” Viktor said with an exasperated sigh. “Really, Lucian, must we keep this up?”

 

“And this?” He touched the Elder just above his small triangle of pubic hair.

 

“No.”

 

“How about now?” He moved his hand to the area around Viktor’s navel, close to the gunshot wound. The Vampire gasped, and Lucian realized that he’d finally found a spot with some feeling.

 

“Yes… I can feel that.”

 

“Alright, I see… I’m sorry to tell you this, but you don’t seem to have any feeling left below the waist.”

 

“Tell me something I don’t know already,” Viktor snapped back. “I mean… look at me! I’m a wreck… pathetic. Not even half of what I used to be! I’m ruined… why did you let me live, Lucian?”

 

The Lycan immediately gathered the Vampire into his arms and held him firmly. “Don’t talk like that, Viktor. It’s nonsense. You’re alive, and that is all that matters at this point. You’re still the same person to me. What does it matter if you can or cannot walk? I love you for your essence, not your legs!”

 

Viktor felt tears behind his eyelids and fought frenziedly to hold them back. He might be crippled, but he didn’t want anyone - especially Lucian - to think him weak, and to him, tears had always been a sign of weakness. He badly wanted to believe Lucian’s words, but his heart could not accept them. He was the Coven Elder; how was he supposed to rule over the Vampire population confined to a wretched wheelchair? The answer was simple - he couldn’t. He would be dependant on others for the rest of his immortal life, and Viktor couldn’t bear the thought. The others would pity him, and that was something else the Elder couldn’t stand. No, it would have been better if Lucian had simply finished him off. Nothing could be worse than this.

 

When Lucian noticed the trembling in Viktor’s slender frame, he soothingly stroked his lover’s soft, blond hair. “It’s alright…” he murmured. “I know you feel that way right now, but things will get better. I can promise you that.”

 

The Elder shook his head vehemently. Lucian didn’t know what he was talking about. Nothing would ever be alright. Not after this.

 

“I’m not going to get better, am I?” Viktor murmured almost inaudibly against Lucian’s clothed shoulder. “I will be stuck like this forever.”

 

The Lycan placed his hands on the Vampire’s shoulders and held him at arm’s length. He looked Viktor straight in the eye. “I won’t lie to you,” he said gravely. “Spinal nerve damage doesn’t just heal… even in us. There’s a risk you won’t regain any feeling or mobility in your lower body, but maybe with lots of exercise and physiotherapy…”

 

Viktor snorted contemptuously and jerked away from Lucian’s grasp. “Spare me the lecture! I’m not interested in hearing what you have to say. I’m ruined - nothing can change that!”

 

Lucian sighed; he was tempted to give in, leave the room, and allow Viktor some time to calm himself, but something made him continue. “I was saying that with exercise and physiotherapy, you’ll be able to use your upper body to do things people normally do with their legs.”

 

The Elder did not seem impressed. “Oh, am I supposed to cheer now?” he said sarcastically. “What do you suggest I do? Walk with my hands?”

 

“You’ll be needing a wheelchair, of course, but it’s not as bad as it sounds…”

 

“Isn’t it? Tell me, Lucian - how do you know? Have you ever needed one?”

 

“No…” the Lycan sighed and was forced to lower his eyes. Viktor had a point, and Lucian didn’t know how to counter it. The truth was that he had never been in a similar situation himself. He had been injured many times in the past, sometimes badly, but he’d always made a full recovery and never been exclusively dependant on others.

 

“I’m sorry,” he said guiltily. “I… I shouldn’t have pretended to know how you feel. That was insensitive of me. Forgive me, please?”

 

The Vampire shrugged. “I know, Lucian. You were only trying to make me feel better, but I’m sorry to tell you that it’s not working.”

 

“I don’t claim to know how you feel,” Lucian said slowly, “but I do know one thing. It could have been worse, Viktor. At least you can still use your hands.”

 

The Elder gave another disdainful snort. “Use my hands? For what? To play the piano? To paint? Sewing, perhaps? I sure as hell can’t defend myself if those people who did this to me decide to burst in through that door and finish what they started!”

 

“That won’t happen. You’re safe here.”

 

“Maybe, but that is not the point. The point is that I’m helpless.”

 

“I won’t let anything happen to you,” Lucian vowed, reaching out to touch the Elder’s face. It was very important to him that Viktor still tolerated his touch, if not as a lover, then at least at an asexual level. Viktor didn’t recoil or slap his hand away, but the Vampire didn’t lean into it either.

 

“You should have thought about that last night…” the Elder murmured, and his words, although spoken unobtrusively, nearly broke Lucian’s heart. Viktor simply told him what he had known all long -- this was his fault, he should have done more to protect his lover. Now the Elder was crippled for life, and he was responsible. The Lycan felt tears beneath his eyelids and his voice was thick when he finally spoke.

 

“I tried, Viktor, I tried… If I could have taken those bullets for you, I would have, believe me…”

 

“Yes, Lucian. I believe you,” Viktor replied calmly. //I just wish you would have had the courage to kill me instead of bringing me here in this pitiful state.// He thought the words but did not speak them out loud. Lucian was already upset enough, and further spurring his guilt was not a good idea.

 

“Can I get you something? Anything?” the hapless Lycan asked, hoping that he’d somehow be able to help the downhearted Elder.

 

“Well, I’m hungry, so I wouldn’t refuse a glass of blood,” the Vampire said.

 

“I don’t have any right now, but I was planning on heading out for a hunt later tonight.”

 

Viktor frowned and regarded Lucian with a puzzled expression. “You gave me some last night. I can remember that.”

 

“That… ahem… was my blood,” Lucian explained, unsure of Viktor’s reaction to that news.

 

“*Your* blood?” the Elder asked incredulously. He had never before in his life drunk from a Lycan, and even though he’d gone as far as taking a Lycan lover, the thought of drinking from one still alienated him. Besides, he knew that their respective bites were a death sentence to the other species.

 

Lucian looked guilty again and spoke to justify his actions. “Viktor, please. I did it to save your life. Had I not done it, you would have died.”

 

The Vampire’s feelings were mixed: the repugnance against having Lycan blood in his system was quite strong, but he was also honoured that Lucian loved him enough to open his veins for him.

 

“It’s alright, I’m not mad,” he said reassuringly and even managed to smile a little. “You took me aback, that is all.”

 

The Lycan sighed in relief and lifted Viktor’s hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to the pale knuckles. “Thank you.”

 

“I’m still hungry, though,” the Elder remarked. “And it’s not like I can take care of my own feeding anymore,” he added somewhat more pointedly.

 

“Don’t worry, I won’t let you starve,” Lucian replied. “I’ll go hunting at once. I’m kind of hungry myself.”

 

“And leave me alone?” Viktor sounded both surprised and dismayed. The Lycan sighed. What did the Vampire think? He could hardly go hunting with the Elder as his backpack, after all.

 

“Don’t worry, you’re safe here. I won’t be gone long. A couple of hours at most.”

 

He left the bedroom and went to the kitchen to bring Viktor a glass of water -- it was probably a poor supplement for blood, but at least the Vampire would be able to wet his throat.

 

“I asked for blood, not water,” Viktor scoffed when Lucian re-entered, placing the water glass on the small bedside table.

 

“In due time, my Elder,” the Lycan smirked back. “You’ll have to settle with this in the meantime.”

 

He leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss to the Vampire’s high, pale forehead. “You can take a nap while I’m gone. Makes time go by faster.”

 

When Lucian was already at the door, Viktor suddenly spoke up. “I would have done it, you know.”

 

The Lycan turned around. “What, Viktor?”

 

“In the woods… If our roles had been reversed last night, I would have killed you.”

 

 

Chapter 3

 

Lucian moved through the dark, night-time forest, tracing the scent of a deer. He was in his wolven shape again, fully transformed and enjoying the freedom this side gave him. He was an animal in body and at heart, even though his mind stayed - mostly - human. He’d been tracking the animal for over half an hour and was reducing the distance between them by the minute.

 

Deer were fast, but so were changed werewolves, and the hoofed animal did not possess a Lycan’s endurance. After a few more minutes of pursuit, Lucian got close enough to see his target through the vegetation. He sped up even more before taking a giant leap and felling the fleeing deer, which didn’t stand a chance against the Lycan’s 300 pounds of pure muscle and carnage.

 

He ended the struggling animal’s life with a precise and deadly bite to its throat, and the furred body grew limp in his mighty arms within seconds. The taste of blood in his mouth almost made his primal side take over, and the urge to devour the sweet, tender meat was huge. Still, he resisted. He had Viktor to think about. The Elder needed blood, and Lucian had promised to get him some.

 

So what he should do now was to haul the carcass over his shoulder, head back to the cabin, cut the animal’s throat, and let the blood pour into a bucket. He could keep the meat for himself, and this carcass would provide him with enough food for a week. If he lost self-control now and gave in to his bestial instincts, he’d never be able to forgive himself.

 

//I have two mouths to feed now…// Lucian thought ruefully as he rose and dragged the deer up with him. It was a fairly big specimen; almost his weight, and he wouldn’t be able to return at the same speed. Oh, well, not that it mattered much. He’d promised Viktor a couple of hours, but as long as he returned before sunrise, things were under control.

 

The jog back to the cabin would take more than an hour.

 

*~*~*

 

The Elder had tried going back to sleep, but it wasn’t working. He was not really tired, and the knowledge about his condition was enough to keep him awake, as well. All he could do was wait… wait for Lucian to return. Viktor had realized that he was completely at the Lycan’s mercy now. It didn’t worry him, but it aggravated him more than words could describe. Lucian would have to help him with everything… feeding, getting dressed, attending to his personal hygiene…

 

Viktor hated being helpless. He rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. It had probably been white once upon a time, but now it was greyish and full of fissures. Damp stains and cobwebs had spread out from the corners, some of them older than others. It proved that this cabin had been empty for some time.

 

Trailing his hands over his chest, the Vampire touched the bullet wound close to his heart. It was still slightly sore, and his grazed lung ached whenever he inhaled sharply, but it was basically healing as he watched. Viktor passed his hand to the other wound below his ribcage. The damage caused by this one wouldn’t heal. Ever. It was painfully obvious now. The bullet had practically cut him in half.

 

He brought his hand even lower, below the navel, and from there his flesh was numb. The Elder combed his fingers through fine strands of pubic hair and gripped his penis. The warm, soft piece of flesh felt just as it always did in his hand, only now it felt like a foreign object.

 

Viktor swept the covers away; now that he lacked tactile sense, his vision had become all the more important. His cock looked just as usual, too. The only difference was that the feeling was now gone. He gave it a few slow, firm strokes just to see if anything would happen. Nothing. The organ remained flaccid, and the Elder didn’t feel a thing.

 

Oh, he knew that a paralysis didn’t automatically make one impotent as well, but what was the point of getting an erection if he couldn’t feel it? He’d be unable to enjoy sex.

 

Viktor sighed heavily and closed his eyes. He really didn’t have many bright aspects left in his life. Being a sentient person, sexual pleasure had always been very important to the Elder, and it was depressing beyond belief knowing that it was something he was now probably incapable of experiencing.

 

Unless… Despite being numb to penile stimulation, perhaps he could still get pleasure from having his prostate rubbed? Viktor ceased to fondle his lifeless cock and moved his hand lower, past his scrotum, until he reached his rear entrance. Having lost mobility in his legs, he had to spread them apart with his hands to get better access to himself. The position was not optimal, but he’d give it a try. The Elder slicked his fingers with spit just in case and slowly started working his forefinger into his channel.

 

The nerves around his anus must have been cut off as well, because he couldn’t feel the entry. Trying not to let this discourage him, Viktor worked the finger in deeper. He knew approximately where his prostate was located; the problem was to reach it from this position.

 

After a few fruitless attempts, the Vampire rolled onto his side and pulled his immobile legs toward his chest, thinking he might succeed better if he tried going in from behind. When he felt no apparent difference, he figured that perhaps some erotic mental imaging could help.

 

Closing his eyes, Viktor imagined Lucian, gloriously naked before him, and that the Lycan’s fingers were moving inside him instead of his own. Or even better -- his member. If something as large as Lucian’s cock was to enter him, surely he’d feel it, paralysed or not. The Elder smiled absently at his own mental images, still trying to find the correct spot within his body.

 

When he opened his eyes again, he was more than a little surprised to discover that he had an erection. Viktor hadn’t felt his cock engorge; he only knew it because he could see it. Moving his other hand between his legs, he gave the organ a few strokes, but he might as well have caressed a piece of wood.

 

Sighing, he withdrew both hands and rolled onto his back. This was hardly a success, but it wasn’t a complete failure either. He’d do more experimenting later. When Lucian returned, he’d ask the Lycan to fuck him. Long and hard and deep, as he always did. Surely Lucian would grant him that favour.

 

Viktor drew the covers back up and waited. He was bored. So very bored and restless. The Elder had never been a patient man, and that hadn’t changed with the paralysis. The only difference now was that he couldn’t do anything about it. In fact, he had no choice but to stay in this small room, in this bed. He was literally stuck here.

 

The hours passed, and there was no sign of the Lycan’s return. Lucian had promised him a couple of hours, but he’d been gone much longer than that -- or so it felt. The Elder wished he could have gone to sleep, but that was impossible. After a while of restless twisting and turning, another emotion started gnawing at him - anxiety. What if Lucian was taking so long because something had happened to him?

 

Perhaps those human military guys were still looking for them in this area and Lucian had been captured? The more he thought about it, the more he started to believe it. The cold, heavy feeling in Viktor’s chest grew by each passing minute, and soon it was nearly unbearable.

 

He hated being stuck, helpless, in this bed. Was there really nothing he could do? The Elder threw a glance at the window, still covered by the heavy blankets Lucian had hung up to protect him from the sunlight.

 

The room was small, but the window was located at the opposite end of the bed, and Viktor found himself unable to reach it. He badly wanted to tear the blankets down and look outside. If he managed, he’d be able to see if anyone approached the cabin. It wasn’t much, but it was something.

 

Suddenly determined, the Vampire pulled himself into a sitting position with the help of the bedpost,t and with some strain, lifted his legs over the edge of the bed. His chest ached a little, but he didn’t let that stop him. The window was about four feet away. If he really tried to reach out… maybe, *maybe* he could tear the blankets down.

 

Viktor decided that it was worth a try. He practically threw himself off the bed, and although his fingers brushed the fabric, the attempt failed miserably. The Vampire fell headlong to the floor, momentarily forgetting that his legs were now useless. The impact made Viktor groan from pain and surprise. The blankets remained where they were, and he was lying prone on the cold floor -- naked.

 

Angry and frustrated, the Elder dragged his body toward the bed and tried to pull himself back onto it. Once more, he failed. He could simply not gain any leverage, and the exertion made his chest ache intensely. Almost not able to breathe, Viktor was forced to give up.

 

Panting heavily, he leaned his pounding head against the bedside table and tried to make his taut body relax. Could this situation get any worse? What was he supposed to do now? Clearly he could not get himself out of this mess, so all he could do was wait for Lucian’s return.

 

But what if Lucian would not return? The awful feeling of dread closed its cold, heavy claws around Viktor’s heart again. If that were the case, what would happen to him? Without the Lycan, he was doomed. The Elder had desired death many times in the past 24 hours, but the way he was going to die without Lucian was terrifying. He would die from starvation and be left to rot within the walls of this little desolate cabin. Maybe someone would come here and find his remains in a decade or two -- or not.

 

After a while, Viktor began to get cold. He slowly crawled into a corner and pressed up against the two walls, hugging himself and rubbing his skin with his palms. Goose pimples formed on his legs as well, but of course he could no longer feel that. He wished he’d been able to pull his legs up. It could have helped him preserve some warmth and made him feel not quite so exposed.

 

//Damn you, Lucian…// he thought. //You promised… You *promised* me…//

 

*~*~*

 

When Lucian finally returned, it was almost dawn, and he could see the faint brightening in the east. He’d been gone longer than he had planned, partly because of the deer, but also because he’d let his animal instincts take over. There was no place better for a changed Lycan than a night-time forest.

 

Once he reached the cabin, he changed back, hung the carcass from a branch, and let the remaining blood pour into a metal bucket. By the time he was finished, the bucket was almost full. Lucian left it at the flight of steps and entered the cabin. He had been smart enough to take his clothes off and leave them here before he transformed, as they were his only set.

 

The bedroom door was closed, just as he’d left it. The Lycan scoffed. What else could it be? It wasn’t like Viktor could walk around in the cabin.

 

He was still covered in the deer’s blood, so instead of going to see the Elder, he went to the bathroom to clean himself up. Once he looked somewhat presentable, he redressed and walked silently over to the bedroom, not wanting to wake the Vampire in case he was asleep.

 

Lucian was shocked to discover that the bed was empty, and it took his roaming eyes a while to locate the Elder. Viktor was in the corner, naked, curled up, and very pale. He lifted his head when he heard Lucian’s entry and looked as if he’d just seen a ghost.  

 

The Lycan rushed over to him in a flash. “Viktor!” He grasped the Vampire’s angular shoulders. “Why are you on the floor? Has something happened?”

 

The Elder stared back at him with an odd mixture of relief and fury. “And where the hell have you been?!” he yelled straight in Lucian’s face. “You were gone for… for… I don’t know how long! I thought you weren’t coming back! How could you do this, Lucian?”

 

“I… I…” Lucian felt his face fall, and he had no answer to Viktor’s desperate and angry cries. Obviously he’d been gone longer than he’d believed himself and frightened the Vampire. Badly. Viktor seemed to be on the verge of breaking.

 

“I’m sorry…” Lucian murmured, suddenly feeling terrible. “I got carried away… I guess I didn’t realize that… Oh, please, forgive me… Come here, Viktor…” He gently drew the Elder into his arms and was surprised when Viktor clutched him almost spasmodically.

 

“You’re as cold as ice!” the Lycan exclaimed when Viktor’s hands touched his bare skin. “How long have you been on the floor?”

 

“I’m not sure… two hours, maybe…” the Elder murmured into Lucian’s grey T-shirt, wetting the fabric with spit.

 

“Oh, God… Well, it’s alright now. We just have to get you warm…”

 

He gathered the Vampire into his arms, stood up, and carried Viktor back to the bed. The Elder shivered when he wrapped the covers around himself and Lucian sat down on the bed’s edge. He took Viktor’s cold hands into his own and started rubbing them affectionately, trying to reintroduce some warmth to the slender, bony extremities.

 

“Hey, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but I’d like to know how you ended up on the floor.”

 

Viktor shot him a glum look. “You’re right -- I don’t have to tell you.”

 

Lucian tried to smile. “Alright… Was it an accident?”

 

“You could call it that, yes…” the Elder muttered. “Let’s say I’m used to getting out of bed on my own.”

 

“Why did you want to leave the bed?”

 

“Because I hate being confined to this shitty little room! Why do you think? I thought you weren’t coming back!”

 

Lucian lowered his eyes, feeling guilty again. “I’m sorry if I frightened you, but don’t you see? I would never leave you! How can you even think that…?”

 

“Not willingly, perhaps,” Viktor said pointedly. “But don’t you remember why we’re here in the first place?”

 

“I don’t think they’re still looking for us in this area…” the Lycan said quietly.

 

“Maybe, maybe not… We can’t know for certain.”

 

“Anyway, the hunt was successful. I felled a deer. Shall I bring you some blood?”

 

Viktor was still angry with Lucian for being so thoughtless, but he was also hungry. There was no denying that. “Yes, please do,” he replied curtly.

 

The Lycan left and returned a minute later with a glass of animal blood. “I see you didn’t touch the water,” he smiled when noticing that the water glass still stood untouched.

 

Viktor gave it a disinterested glance. He had barely even remembered the water. “I prefer what you’re holding in your hands,” he said, nodding knowingly.

 

Lucian handed him the glass, and the Elder had to repress the urge to gulp it down in two seconds. The first mouthful made him grimace. He’d never been fond of animal blood, and the past few years had made him quite used to cloned blood instead. Still, the red fluid felt like silk to his dry throat, and the glass was empty within fifteen seconds. He was tempted to ask Lucian for more, but he also realized that the supply wasn’t infinite.

 

“Thank you…” Viktor murmured, placing the empty glass on the bedside table next to the water. It wasn’t quite worth the emotional and physical trauma he had suffered during Lucian’s prolonged absence, but almost. The Lycan caressed his face, and the Vampire was reminded of the favour he wanted to ask Lucian.

 

“Could you do something for me?”

 

“Anything, if only it’s in my power.”

 

“Fuck me,” Viktor said.

 

Lucian didn’t quite trust his own ears. Had Viktor just said…? “I’m sorry?”

 

“I believe you heard me the first time. Fuck me. My cock is numb, so it’s no use touching it anymore, but maybe you could stimulate my prostate with *your* cock? I believe it’s the only kind of sexual pleasure I can still experience.”

 

Sighing heavily, Lucian tried to understand the true meaning of Viktor’s request. “Yes, you may be right, but I don’t think we should have sex now, Viktor. It’s too soon, and…”

 

“Why not? Don’t you find me attractive anymore?”

 

“It’s not that!” the Lycan objected. “I’ll always find you attractive, but you were shot and nearly killed last night…”

 

“So? I heal fast. It’s not like I asked you to fuck me in the bullet wounds, did I? I just want to know if I can still feel anything… in there.”

 

Lucian felt so sorry for his lover that he almost gave in to his request, but he wanted to give the Elder some more time to heal before trying anything like that. Besides, this situation didn’t exactly arouse the Lycan. “Viktor, my dear… There are other ways to get pleasure than sex,” he said.

 

Viktor scoffed. “Oh, care to enlighten me?”

 

“Turn over, and I’ll show you one.”

 

The Vampire was slightly bemused, but he did as Lucian suggested and rolled onto his stomach, resting his head on his forearms. He felt Lucian pull the covers down to his waist, and the word “relax” was purred in his ear. Viktor did his best to comply, wondering what the Lycan had in mind.

 

Lucian took a moment to simply regard the Elder’s beautifully sculptured back. Apart from the bullet wounds, his lover was perfection. Then he slowly grazed his nails along Viktor’s spine, back up over his shoulder blades, and from there to his flanks. It wasn’t long before a sigh of pleasure escaped the Vampire’s lips and he melted into the touch. The Lycan smiled to himself. Viktor loved having his back caressed, and as it was a place where he’d retained feeling, touching him there was only natural.

 

“You like this, don’t you…?” Lucian purred, continuing the slight caresses until the Elder was writhing and shivering beneath his hands.

 

“Oh, yes… Don’t stop… don’t ever stop…”

 

And Lucian didn’t stop until Viktor’s pleasure-filled moans had been replaced by soft snoring.

 

 

Chapter 4

 

Leaving Viktor sleeping in the bed, Lucian got up around sunset, prepared himself a meal, and discovered how hungry he actually was. The cabin had an oven, but he ate the meat raw. Even in his human shape, he preferred raw meat to cooked.

 

While waiting for the Elder to awaken, Lucian explored the cabin and its yard more thoroughly. There was no telephone, so they had no way to communicate with the outside world, but that wasn’t really a big surprise.

 

He cut the carcass down and chopped it up, storing the meat in the small cellar together with Viktor’s blood. The Lycan was quite sure that it was cold enough. And if not… at least he’d know that the next time he brought a prey here.

 

There was no functioning clock, so knowing the exact time was impossible, but when he believed that midnight was approaching, Lucian decided to check on Viktor. The Vampire had slept for quite long enough.

 

Viktor opened his eyes and blinked sleepily when the Lycan entered and gently shook him awake. Stretching his arms, he yawned and buried his face in the pillow again. “What time is it…?”

 

“Late enough,” Lucian smirked back. “I thought you might like some breakfast?” He placed a glass half-filled with animal blood on the bedside table. The smell immediately reached the Vampire’s nostrils, and he lifted his head.

 

“Don’t I get more?” he asked when noticing that the glass was only half-full.

 

“We have to ration what we have,” Lucian replied. “I can’t go hunting every night, can I?”

 

Viktor gave a disappointed sigh but realized that the Lycan was right. Reaching for the glass, he brought it to his lips and grimaced both at the taste and the temperature of the blood. It was so cold that it made his teeth hurt, and the Elder had always preferred drinking his blood warm. Even with cloned blood, he always used to heat it up before drinking.

 

But this wasn’t exactly a normal situation, and he had to make the best of it. At least he had something to feed on. For now, anyway. The fluid brought Viktor out of the grogginess of sleep and almost made him feel alert.

 

“So, what happens now?” he asked after a while of silence. “Will you go out and leave me here alone again?”

 

Lucian smiled reassuringly. “I wasn’t planning to. We have enough meat and blood for a few days, and I won’t head out there needlessly.”

 

“Good. Then would you like to join me here?” The Elder lifted the bedcovers and gestured at Lucian to crawl down there as well.

 

“You want that?” the Lycan asked, mildly surprised. He hadn’t believed that Viktor desired any close contact now.

 

The Vampire arched an eyebrow. “I thought you woke me up for company?” he said.

 

Lucian chuckled embarrassedly. “Yes, that too,” he admitted. With nothing to do in the cabin or outside, he had grown slightly bored. “Oh, alright, I’ll join you.” Lucian got into the bed and pulled the Elder into his arms, spooning up against his back. Kissing Viktor’s nape, he felt the fine hairs in his lover’s neck tickle his nose. It made him snicker. It was natural to Lycans to appreciate most kinds of bodily contact, but Vampires tended to be more averse to such. Even among lovers, close physical contact was usually restricted to sex and its afterglow.

 

“Have you thought more about my request?” Viktor suddenly asked.

 

“Hmmm… what do you mean?” Lucian murmured. The comfortable position and the silence had started making him sleepy again.

 

The Elder twisted his head so that he could look at the Lycan over his shoulder. “I really want to try… you know. And I promise you that I am well enough for it.”

 

Oh, that, Lucian thought with mixed feelings. “Viktor, listen… Are you sure you want to have sex already? I can’t guarantee that it will feel like before, and…”

 

“I know it won’t feel “like before”, but I want to know if I can feel *something*!” Viktor interrupted. “Lucian, please? Unless you’re not attracted to me anymore--”

 

“It’s not that! I just don’t want to…” He sighed. Lame excuses. Supposedly, some soft and gentle sex wouldn’t hurt the Elder. He could stop at once if Viktor experienced any kind of discomfort. “Alright, then,” Lucian admitted. “Let’s see how much feeling you have left in there.”

 

He disengaged from the embrace and sat up, pushing the covers away. He would thoroughly explore Viktor’s insides before penetrating him with his member. They had no other lubricant than spit, and if the Vampire could feel nothing at all, Lucian might end up hurting him unintentionally.

 

“Thank you,” Viktor said. “What made you change your mind?”

 

The Lycan grinned and reached down to caress the Elder’s face and neck. “Well, I figured that it can hardly damage your health, and I still find you very desirable… The paralysis hasn’t changed that, even if you thought so.”

 

Viktor gave him a tiny smile in return. It was clear that he wasn’t ready for anything bigger yet. “How do you want me?”

 

“Hmmm… I think it’ll be best if you lie down on your belly, to begin with. Yes, like that… and let’s use this, too…”

 

Lucian grabbed a pillow and placed it under the Elder’s hips, raising his pale bottom off the bed. The Lycan had to confess that he enjoyed the sight of Viktor in that position, all eager and ready to be taken, and his groin tightened considerably. No, the paralysis had definitely not made the Vampire any less desirable.

 

He stroked Viktor’s beautiful back from neck to tailbone, causing a shiver to pass through the other man’s body. “Alright, try to relax…”

 

After spreading the Elder’s legs, Lucian took a moment to massage his lover’s buttocks, relishing the smooth firmness. There was no reaction in the Vampire, so it had to mean that Viktor felt nothing. The Lycan slicked his finger and rubbed it along the length of Viktor’s cleft before gently massaging the pink, puckered ring of his entrance. The muscle gripped his digit when he inserted it, but it was a reflex, and the Vampire probably didn’t feel it himself.

 

“Can you feel this? I’m inside,” Lucian told him.

 

“No…” the Elder murmured in reply. “But go deeper…”

 

The Lycan complied and began to slide his finger back and forth, going a bit deeper every time he thrust back in. Eventually he reached Viktor’s prostate and carefully rubbed the walnut-sized gland through the rectal wall. He had done it many times in the past, too, but now was different.

 

Finally there *was* a reaction. The Vampire shuddered and gave a drawn-out moan, rubbing his face into the pillow. “Oh, yes… I… I can feel that!” Viktor gasped, sighing happily. He could feel it, and it felt wonderful… just as he remembered it to be. “Oh, Lucian… please…?”

 

Lucian added a second finger, using them both to pressure and stimulate that special spot in his lover’s body, and soon Viktor was beyond begging. All he could manage were incoherent murmurs and moans of pleasure. Lucian rubbed the small of his back with his other hand, partly to keep him still.

 

“Does that feel good?”

 

“Oh, yes, but… I asked for more than your fingers...” the Elder replied shakily.

 

“Are you sure?” Lucian asked one more time. *His* pleasure was not important in this, after all. He only wanted to please his love.

 

“Yes, of course I’m sure!” Viktor raised his head from the pillow and eyed Lucian’s still clothed form. “And take off your clothes. I hate being the only one naked!”

 

“Oh, really? Well, that shouldn’t be too difficult to remedy!” He managed to get his jeans and his T-shirt off in less than ten seconds, and it was a great feeling, letting his throbbing erection spring free. Viktor got a hungry look on his face when he took in the sight of the naked Lycan, and his eyes shifted from natural blue into a brighter, unnatural nuance.

 

“Don’t wait…” he whispered. “I want you inside me.”

 

Lucian was more than happy to grant the Elder’s wish, but first he had to come up with a position that wouldn’t put too much strain on Viktor’s healing injuries. The current one wasn’t a good choice, and neither was the missionary position, as he wouldn’t be able to avoid pressuring the Vampire’s chest and abdomen.

 

From behind wouldn’t work because Viktor was unable to stay on his knees without support, and the Elder had never liked the “doggy-style” position anyway. The best option was probably to put Viktor on his lap and let the Vampire’s immobile legs rest on either side of him. That way he wouldn’t burden Viktor with his weight, and he’d also be able to kiss and touch his lover intimately.

 

When Viktor turned over and struggled to sit up, Lucian could see that the Elder’s cock was rock hard. He probably couldn’t feel it himself, but at least he was aroused, and that mattered most. The Lycan pulled him onto his lap and helped the Vampire straddle him. Normally Viktor would have wrapped his legs around Lucian’s waist, but being unable to do so now, they were left outstretched as a V on either side of the Lycan’s hips.

 

“Alright, are you ready?” Lucian asked, pressing Viktor against himself, while his other hand guided his erection to the Vampire’s entrance. He had already applied a generous amount of spit to his cock and was hoping that it would serve well as lubricant.

 

“Oh, yes…” the Elder breathed, arms wound around his lover’s neck. He could barely wait for the Lycan to get started.

 

“Are you really sure you want this?”

 

Viktor gave an exasperated sigh before answering. “If you ask me that one more time, I’m going to whack you over the head! Now go ahead! Fuck me!”

 

Lucian needed no further encouragement. Viktor was relaxed enough, so the head of his cock slid in easily. Little by little, Lucian lowered the Vampire onto his erection. It was tempting just to plunge in hard and deep, but he had promised himself and Viktor to go slowly, and he would keep that promise.

 

Once the Lycan was about two thirds inside, a tremble passed through Viktor, and Lucian immediately tensed. “Is something wrong? Shall I stop?”

 

“No… No! It just feels… good. Keep going…”

 

Sweat broke out all over the Elder’s heated body when Lucian gradually entered him and started thrusting gently. He could feel it… Not as before, but he could definitely feel it and failed to hold back a mewl of delight when the Lycan’s cock nudged his prostate. Their torsos were also joined intimately, Lucian’s hairy chest rubbing against Viktor’s smooth one.

 

After a while, when he had seen that the Vampire’s responses were all positive, the Lycan sped up his pace a little. Passing his hand up along the Elder’s spine, he gripped Viktor’s neck and brought their mouths together in a searing kiss. When they parted for air, Lucian was rewarded with a moan of pleasure from his lover, who let his head fall back, exposing his throat to the Lycan.

 

Lucian knew that biting and exchange of blood was common among Vampire lovers, but of course that was off limit for the two of them. The neck was still one of Viktor’s highly erogenous zones, and Lucian knew this. He took the opportunity presented and started applying wet, loving kisses to the Elder’s throat. When his teeth lightly grazed Viktor’s pulse point, the Vampire gasped.

 

“Did you like that…? I can do it again…” Lucian repeated the action several times, and by the time he moved on to another spot, Viktor was trembling vehemently in his arms, his cheeks hot and flushed with passion.

 

“Oh, God… Lucian…” The Elder clutched his lover’s shoulders and neck muscles almost spasmodically. The two mixed pleasures -- the hard, heavy cock sliding in and out of him, and the leisurely tongue moving along his throat -- were quickly driving him over the edge, and it felt as though his over-sensitive upper body was on fire. When he felt the Lycan’s fist tangling in his hair, Viktor dug his own hands into Lucian’s thick, brown mane and slumped forward, burying his face in the crook of the other man’s neck.

 

“I’m close…” Lucian panted and instinctively tightened his arms around Viktor. “So close…” He wouldn’t last long now. The Vampire’s tight heat, squeezing his member from all directions, plus all the other sensations would make him spend his seed soon enough. The urge was there to just slam savagely into the slim body impaled on his shaft, but he had to hold back, for Viktor’s sake. Damaging the Elder’s bowels, especially as he probably wouldn’t feel anything, was not a good idea.

 

Lucian’s eyes turned Lycan-blue and his canines elongated just a little when he erupted in a powerful climax, spilling himself deep in Viktor’s core. Hearing the Vampire moan and whimper indiscriminately, he realized that Viktor had found his release as well; mayhap it wasn’t a conventional male orgasm, but at least it was pleasurable.

 

Momentarily drained, the two immortals rested with their arms around each other and foreheads together. Still panting heavily, Viktor was the first to speak. “Lucian… I think I came…” he whispered.

 

“You did? Viktor, that’s wonderful…” Lucian stroked the length of the Elder’s back, tracing each bump of his spine.

 

“No, I mean I… ejaculated,” the Vampire clarified, nodding at his nether regions.

 

The Lycan looked down as well, and to his surprise, Viktor was right. Pearly drops of semen coated their stomachs, and some was still leaking from the tiny slit in the Elder’s softening cock.

 

“Wow…” Lucian murmured. “I wasn’t sure you’d be able to, now when… Did you feel it?”

 

“No, but I felt the wetness. It must have been triggered by the pressure to my prostate.”

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t stroke you… but I sort of believed that it wouldn’t matter, because…”

 

“Oh, it’s alright,” Viktor chuckled quietly. “You stroked me inside, and that is all that matters.”

 

They kissed again, and when they parted, Lucian asked, “Should I clean us now?”

 

“Yes, alright…”

 

He slid out of the Elder and gently lowered Viktor onto his back in the bed. Reaching into one of the bedside drawers, the Lycan found a small towel and dipped it in the water glass still standing on the table. Then he gently but thoroughly swabbed the Vampire’s rump, thighs, and belly, and finished with his own cock.

 

Climbing back into bed, Lucian stretched out beside Viktor and pulled the sated Elder into his embrace. “Thank you…” the blond Vampire murmured, moving into the curve of Lucian’s arm so that he was comfortably resting his head against the Lycan’s chest.

 

“For what?” Lucian asked, puzzled.

 

“For doing this… for me. It was wonderful.”

 

“Hmmm, it really was… You’re very welcome.” He kissed the top of the Elder’s blond head and stroked the other’s back affectionately.

 

“Was it good for you too?” Viktor asked, squirming awkwardly. “I mean… I hate to think that I’ve gone slack… down there, as well.”

 

Lucian couldn’t help laughing and received an indignant look from the Vampire for his mirth. “Oh, Viktor, don’t worry about that! You have *definitely* not gone slack, and it was wonderful for me, too. You felt just like before.”

 

Viktor relaxed at this and forgot about his annoyance. “Are you sleepy, Lucian?” he asked.

 

“Not really,” the Lycan replied. “You?”

 

“Me neither… But I suppose I don’t have a lot of options for spending the night here…”

 

The Elder began to sound depressed again, and Lucian wanted to avoid that at any cost. “What would you like to do?”

 

“I don’t know… There’s not even a TV here, is there?” The first time Viktor was confronted with a TV, the loud, blustering piece of tin had given him a splitting headache, but in recent years, he’d grown quite fond of it.

 

“No… but I did some exploring earlier on and found a bunch of magazines. If you’d like to have a look, I can bring them.”

 

The Elder held back a disappointed sigh and nodded. Supposedly some reading was better than nothing?

 

Lucian left the bed, not bothering to dress, and returned a short time later, carrying a pile of dusty magazines. He dumped the pile in Viktor’s lap and slid down next to the Vampire.

 

The Elder wrinkled his elegant nose in distain as he skimmed through the first few editions. “Tabloids… I don’t read tabloids…” he muttered condescendingly. “And look at this… what kind of people write this garbage?” Viktor read some of the articles out loud. “’I Married An Alien’… Right… ‘The Girl Born With Two Heads’… ‘The Snake is My Masseur’… Lucian! Do you really expect me to while away the time reading *this*?!”

 

The Lycan shrugged, trying hard to hold back laughter. “Well, it’s a magazine about setting odd, new records… Give it a chance. Some of them are pretty amusing…”

 

“They’re hardly “new” anymore,” Viktor pointed out, motioning to the year at the cover page. “1993. They’ve been here for a while.”

 

“Well, not that it matters very much… You sure you aren’t interested?”

 

The Elder shook his head with a scoff. “I think not. Wasn’t there anything better in that pile?”

 

Lucian smiled deviously. “It depends on how you define “better”… I think I glimpsed a porno magazine somewhere in between… Is that something you’d like to see?”

 

“Porno? No, thank you. I don’t care about anyone’s sexual life but my own. Besides, I much rather prefer live models…” Viktor added suggestively and gave the nude Lycan beside him a knowing, thorough look.

 

“If you think I’m going to give you a private performance, forget about it!” Lucian playfully joked and lifted the pile of magazines off Viktor’s lap, placing them on the floor. “What do you suggest we do all night? Make conversation? I don’t know about you, but I’m not exactly in a talkative mood right now…”

 

“I’m thirsty…” the Elder murmured, wetting his dry lips with his tongue. Maybe it was due to the sex, or something else, but the need to drink was suddenly huge.

 

“I’m sorry, Viktor, but you know what I said about rationing,” Lucian replied. “It’s not long since you drank. Here, have some water. Maybe it’ll help.”

 

Viktor glumly accepted the glass handed to him by the Lycan and eyed the transparent fluid. It was plain water… but if he drank some, perhaps it would suppress his need for blood at least temporarily.

 

Lucian watched the Vampire drink and was surprised when Viktor handed him back an almost empty glass. “If you want more, just let me know,” he said.

 

“Whatever…”

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 5

 

The days passed, and all too soon, it seemed, a whole week had gone by. Viktor’s gunshot wounds had nearly healed and left only two small spots with scar tissue on his chest and back respectively. The Elder had also secretly hoped to regain some feeling and mobility in his lower body, but after a week he was still as numb as the night when he was shot, and the grim truth made itself obvious to him.

 

He was stuck like this forever with no hope of improvement.

 

Lucian had not gone out to hunt a second time, partly because Viktor didn’t want to be left alone. Their supply of animal blood decreased by each passing day, and the Vampire started drinking lots of water to quell his thirst. It was a poor supplement that only worked momentarily, and there were also other, less pleasant side effects.

 

When consuming blood, nearly all of it was absorbed by his body, leaving very little waste products. Water, however, was different. It passed through his system almost like nothing, and the need to urinate frequently became huge. Viktor’s usual diet, consisting of blood, forced him to empty his bladder once, maybe twice a week, and going from that to three, four times a night was a big and radical change.

 

The first few times he had called Lucian and had the Lycan carry him to the toilet, which was humiliating beyond belief. Viktor, the supreme Vampire Overlord, was not even able to relieve himself unaided. Not bearing the degradation of being carried away and placed on the toilet seat by someone else, the Elder asked Lucian if not he could use a bowl of some kind as a bedpan, and the Lycan agreed. Viktor had seen blatant and obvious pity in Lucian’s eyes but pretended not to care. He *was* a pitiful creature nowadays, so it was only natural, after all.

 

The deal with the “bedpan” worked better than expected -- Viktor emptied his bladder, Lucian emptied the bowl, cleaned it, and gave it back. The Vampire loathed every second of it, but he had no choice but to keep drinking the water, or his body’s need for blood would drive him crazy. Lucian gave him less than half a glass per night now, and Viktor knew that soon he wouldn’t even get that.

 

Usually the Elder was spared the need to urinate during daylight hours, but on the ninth day that changed. He was awakened by a pressuring sensation in his lower abdomen and realized fearfully that his bladder was filling up yet again.

 

Viktor buried his head in the pillow, clenched his teeth, and tried to make the need disappear by sheer force of will. It didn’t work, of course, and the Vampire grew angrier by the minute. Lucian was lying behind him, spooned against his back, holding the Elder in a protective embrace. Judging from his breaths, the Lycan was peacefully asleep.

 

//I will *not* wake him up!// Viktor thought furiously. The thought of awakening Lucian to ask for his help in the middle of the day was not only humiliating, but repelling. The Lycan would pity him, but he would also be annoyed.

 

The Vampire lay absolutely still, holding himself stubbornly. Still, this was a battle he would eventually lose, and Viktor knew this. He couldn’t win over his own body and its needs. It was only a matter of time.

 

The first thing he became aware of was the abating pressure in his abdomen. It slowly diminished until nothing was left, and then he started feeling the spreading, warm wetness, as well. The truth was painfully obvious even though he tried to block it out. He, Viktor the Vampire Elder, had just wet his bed.

 

After a few minutes he felt Lucian’s body moving, and a puzzled grunt sounded from the Lycan. Viktor closed his eyes and wished he could close his ears as well, knowing that whatever reaction he’d get from Lucian, it would not be positive.

 

At first he didn’t realize what was going on. The sheets and the mattress were… wet? When he lifted the bedcovers and untangled his body from Viktor’s to see what had happened, it didn’t take Lucian long to figure it out. The smell of urine was proof enough.

 

“For fuck’s sake, Viktor!” he exclaimed before he could stop himself. “Did you piss in the bed?! Why the hell did you do that? Why? I was right here! Why didn’t you wake me up?”

 

The Elder listened to his lover’s angry rambling and had to bite down on his lip to suppress a sob. Yes, why, indeed? He realized now that he probably should have asked Lucian for help, after all. It would have been humiliating but not quite as bad as this. Too late now, though. He had wet the bed and had to deal with the consequences.

 

Lucian bounced off the bed and jerked the covers away, all the while snorting and hissing curses. Viktor shivered when the blanket was pulled from him, but he was too ashamed to turn around and look at the Lycan. Instead he continued facing the wall, curled up in a foetal position.

 

When he watched the trembling, naked Vampire hugging himself, Lucian heart softened. He was still more than a little annoyed, but perhaps he’d overreacted? It was nothing that couldn’t be fixed, even though he’d have to wash both the sheets and the mattress.

 

“Viktor…” he said in a gentler voice. “Why…? I was right here… You could have said something…”

 

“It was an accident…” the Elder murmured in a strangled voice. “I couldn’t help it…”

 

“Oh… alright… But you realize what this means, don’t you? I’ll have to clean the bedclothes and the mattress. Preferably at once, so that the smell won’t stick to them.”

 

Viktor unsuccessfully tried to swallow the suffocating lump in his throat. His rump, groin, and thighs were wet with urine, and the mere thought of being covered in his own piss made his stomach turn. More ashamed than ever, the Elder wished he could simply disappear from the face of the earth. There was no place for him out here anymore.

 

Lucian reached for his jeans and pulled them on, not bothering with the T-shirt. He’d be doing laundry soon anyway, and it was no use soaking the only shirt he had. Sighing, he turned to regard the Vampire again.

 

“Viktor, we have to get you off the bed. Come here, I’ll lift you.”

 

He reached forth across the bed, stretching out his arms toward Viktor, but the Elder still did not turn to face him. Lucian’s patience was running out, and he fought to keep his voice calm. “Listen, I know you’re probably not feeling too hot right now, but moping is not going to help. Can you look at me, at least?”

 

When there was still no response, the Lycan worked his arms in under Viktor’s knees and back, lifting the other man into his arms. The Vampire’s body was completely limp and his eyes closed. Lucian gently lowered him onto the floor, propping him up against the wall. Finally Viktor opened his eyes, although he didn’t meet Lucian’s gaze.

 

“I’m cold…” he murmured, rubbing his upper arms.

 

“Yeah, no wonder…” the Lycan agreed, considering the Elder was covered in urine below the waist. “I’m sorry, Viktor, but I can’t take you outside the bedroom now. It’s sunny, and the other rooms have no proper curtains.”

 

Viktor shrugged, head still bent. “Whatever…” he whispered.

 

Lucian, whose mood swung between annoyance and pity, pulled the blanket down from the bed and wrapped it around the downhearted Vampire’s shoulders. “I’ll be right back…” he murmured, brushing back a lock of tousled hair from Viktor’s face. “Will you cope until then?”

 

“What choice do I have…?”

 

Gathering the soiled bed-sheet and mattress, Lucian left the bedroom and quickly closed the door, so as to keep any sunlight from reaching Viktor. Once he was alone, the Elder lifted his head at last and wondered how long he’d have to remain on the floor this time. The blanket helped, but not much: the floor was still cold, and a large part of his body was damp.

 

Why can’t I just… die? Viktor thought miserably. Anything would be better than this… pointless existence. He could never return to the Coven. Not like this. That was a humiliation the Elder was not prepared to face. Not now and not ever. Lucian was one thing: Lycans were servants by nature, but he couldn’t ask his fellow Vampires to tend to him like this. He would be useless… a liability, even. No, he couldn’t stand that. There was no future for him at Ordoghaz. They would be better off believing he was dead.

 

Viktor could hear the sound of running water from the bathroom. Obviously it meant that Lucian was washing *his* urine off the sheets and the mattress. The Elder buried his head in his hands and tried to block out the sounds. Maybe if he banged his head against the wall enough times, things would get quiet in there?

 

No… It was just a temporary solution to the problem, and frankly not quite worth the sore swelling and the headache that would follow.

 

After about forty minutes of patient waiting, Viktor heard Lucian’s footsteps approaching and was filled with both dread and longing. He didn’t want to face the Lycan, but he also wanted to get off the cold floor, and maybe -- just maybe -- he’d lighten up some if he could relax in Lucian’s strong arms, holding him close…

 

*~*~*

 

Once Lucian was finished scrubbing the urine off the bedclothes and the mattress, he went to hang them from a branch out on the yard. It was a fresh, sunny day, so it shouldn’t take too long for them to dry.

 

The hardest task was yet ahead of him, though -- dealing with a glum, melancholy Viktor. Being tired and irritable, Lucian was truly not looking forward to it, but he couldn’t leave the Vampire sitting on the bedroom floor forever. Maybe a gentle approach and an apology would satiate the Elder? Lucian really didn’t want to argue, and perhaps he even owed Viktor one?

 

As expected, the Vampire didn’t look up when Lucian entered. Instead he hid his face even deeper in his hands, as though he willed the Lycan to disappear.

 

“Viktor… I’m sorry I yelled at you earlier…” Lucian began in a genuinely remorseful tone. “What can I say? I overreacted, but it’s just that you…”

 

“What?” Viktor murmured into his palms. “Caused even more work than usual for you?”

 

“I wasn’t saying that… Alright, maybe I sounded a bit… aggravated, but I’m not angry, if that’s what you think. It was an accident, after all… I don’t blame you for it.”

 

Finally the Elder raised his head, but he still didn’t turn to regard the Lycan. “Oh, that’s really big of you, Lucian…” he said sarcastically. “You’re not the one who’s spent the past 45 minutes, or so, on the floor covered in your own piss!”

 

Lucian was annoyed at the Elder’s defensive attitude and lashed back. “Well, Viktor… Perhaps you should have thought about that before wetting the bed!”

 

“Do you think I did it by choice?!” Viktor yelled, finally looked straight at Lucian with furious, sky-blue eyes. “You self-righteous bastard! You think washing those sheets was tough? You should trade places with me for one minute! What do you think it’s like, being stuck in a useless body? I hate it, I hate being unable to take care of myself, and I hate the idea of spending the rest of my immortal life like this! What do you think it’s like?!”

 

The Elder mentally cursed himself for his vehement outburst. All he really wanted now was to feel Lucian’s closeness, to be held, warmed, and comforted, but his wretched pride had gotten in the way. Instead of getting close to Lucian, he had pushed him farther away.

 

“Viktor, please…” Lucian said in a pleading voice. The Vampire’s continuous whining was getting on his nerves, but the sad part was that he could understand Viktor. His old life was gone, and accepting his new one had to be difficult.

 

“What? What am I supposed to do now? Must I remain here on the floor until the mattress has dried?!”

 

“No, of course not…” the Lycan replied, fervently trying to think of a better option. “I can’t take you to the living room, because…”

 

“Yes, I know, Lucian -- the windows have no proper curtains to block out the sun,” Viktor interrupted. “You told me that already. Just because my legs are crippled doesn’t mean my brain is!”

 

Lucian sighed at the snapped reply. He would *not* lose his temper… “No, of course not, and I wasn’t implying that… I’m just trying to find a solution to the problem.”

 

“Well, think harder! How do we usually kill time inside this… doghouse? Let *me* think… We sleep, we talk, or we have sex. Which option appeals most to you? Would you like to fuck me, Lucian? Right… we can’t use the bed, but perhaps you could do me against the wall for a change? I can’t wrap my legs around your waist, but perhaps it can be done anyway.”

 

“Stop it! Just… stop it!” Lucian snarled, massaging his aching temples with his fingertips. “You’re really not making this easier, Viktor! Could you please refrain from using your wretched sarcasm for one minute and let me speak?”

 

The Elder snorted and let his head fall back against the wall. “By all means, speak…”

 

“I know something prolific that can be done before the sun sets. Let’s give you a bath, Viktor. Alright? You aren’t exactly fit to lie between newly washed sheets now, anyway.”

 

The latter had been an attempt at humour, but it was clearly not appreciated by the Vampire, who shot Lucian a piercing stare. “No, thank you, Lucian! I don’t want you to bathe me!” he spat acidly.

 

“I insist,” Lucian said resolutely. “No offence, Viktor, but you need it. You wet the bed, and you wet yourself. I thought you Vampires cared a lot about your hygiene. Besides…” he sniffed the air. “…you smell quite rank. I’m sure you can feel it yourself, as well.”

 

“I will not have you bathe me!” the Elder shot back. “As if what’s happened already wasn’t humiliating enough!”

 

Lucian crossed his arms over his chest and said in a harsh, cold voice, “Viktor, I’m quite fed up with this now. You will bathe, and you will do it now. This really isn’t your choice anymore.”

 

He approached the Vampire with long, determined strides and bent down to pick him up, but when Lucian grabbed him, Viktor began struggling vehemently. In fact, the crippled Vampire Elder was doing everything in his power to push the Lycan away.

 

“No! Let me go! Get away from me!” Viktor howled, pushing and hitting Lucian’s solid body with his hands. He still had considerable upper body strength, but his sparse diet of late had weakened him, along with the healing process, and Lucian was just too strong for him. Still he struggled almost frenziedly, and…

 

The fist slamming into his face -- his left eye, to be correct -- came as a total surprise, and Lucian was taken aback by the sheer ferocity of it. Viktor had punched him, and it hurt! Resisting the urge to seize the meagre Vampire and slam him into the wall, he grabbed the Elder’s wrists instead and pinned them to the floor.

 

“Alright, Viktor! Have it your way!” he snarled, his patience worn out. “We both know who will win this struggle, so it’s really no use you continue! You’ll only exhaust yourself. You hit me, and it hurt -- still does -- but I won’t hurt you. I won’t go that low. Now you have two choices. You can come quietly… or not.”

 

“Go to hell!” the Elder spat, still struggling vainly against the Lycan’s iron grip.

 

“We’re not going to hell, we’re going to the bathroom,” Lucian said, and with that he dragged Viktor up and tossed the enraged Vampire over his left shoulder. The Elder’s lower body remained -- of course -- limp, but the rest of him squirmed like a fish caught on the hook, and Lucian had to grimace when blows started hailing all over his back.

 

“Put me down, you filthy, mangy animal!” Viktor howled, furious when Lucian exited the bedroom with the Elder casually dangling over his shoulder. “You hear me?! Stop this, or I swear I will--!”

 

The Lycan didn’t bother with a reply; in fact he had to fight not to wince from the ferocious punches to his back, but despite this, he was strongly determined to get his will through. Even if it cost him a few bruises and scrapes.

 

Entering the bathroom, which was fortunately windowless, Lucian tried to be gentle when he bent down to lower the struggling Vampire into the bathtub. Luckily the Elder was already naked, so at least Lucian didn’t have to through the process of undressing him. Viktor was destined to lose this struggle, but he had far from given up. Lucian failed to suppress a cry of pain when the Vampire’s slender but strong hand tangled in his long hair and almost jerked it out with the roots.

 

//I will not hurt him… I will *not* hurt him…!// It took more willpower than ever fighting back the urge to backhand Viktor across the face. Growling menacingly, he grabbed Viktor’s wrists once again and squeezed, hard enough to leave bruises but not to do any actual damage.

 

“Now you listen to me!” he spoke in a deadly calm voice. “If you do that again, I *will* hit you, regardless of your condition. Now…” Lucian stopped to take a few deep breaths, calming down in the meanwhile. “…if you could start acting like the 14-century-old warlord that you are, and stop acting like you’re in kindergarten, maybe we can get to business and get this bitch over with?”

 

Viktor glared at him with furious, ice-blue eyes, but he was no longer fighting against Lucian’s hold, and the Lycan considered releasing his hands.

 

“If I let go, can I trust that you won’t try to hit me or pull my hair out?”

 

The Elder considered spitting out another “Go to hell!”, but he also realized that Lucian also meant what he said. Still shaking with anger, Viktor drew a shaky breath, and hissed, “Fine!”

 

Lucian slowly released the Vampire’s wrists, bracing himself for another vicious attack, but none came. Viktor simply gave him a glum look and started rubbing his sore wrists. Soundlessly, the Lycan reached to turn the faucets on. The cabin had no shower, just an old bathtub, so he’d have to give the Vampire an old-fashioned bath.

 

Viktor watched the water slowly rising, although he couldn’t feel it until it reached the upper half of his stomach. Occasionally he threw a furtive glance at Lucian and noticed that the Lycan’s left eye was swelling and becoming discoloured. Viktor knew that he was the cause of it, and the knowledge mainly stirred two emotions within him -- glee and guilt.

 

“Will you, or shall I?” Lucian suddenly asked in a curt voice, offering the Elder a bath sponge slathered with soap. Viktor obstinately refused to accept it, crossing his arms over his chest. If Lucian wanted to bathe him so badly, he might as well do it all by himself!

 

Sighing, the Lycan started scrubbing the Vampire’s skin. He worked quickly and methodically, no longer caring to be gentle. He got nothing for it, anyway. All he wanted now was to get this over with as quickly as possible. Once he had scrubbed Viktor’s arms, shoulders, back, chest, groin, and legs, only the Elder’s hair remained. He hadn’t been able to find any shampoo, so using the soap was his only choice.

 

Viktor stoically withstood the humiliation of being scrubbed by Lucian’s strong, callused -- and usually gentle -- hands. Sharing a bath with a lover could be an incredibly sensual and erotic experience, but there was nothing sensual or erotic about this. Lucian felt more like an aggravated child’s nurse, bathing an obstinate child.

 

Some of the soapy water got into his mouth when Lucian rinsed his hair, and Viktor coughed and sputtered to get the foul-tasting fluid out. He expected the Lycan to say he was sorry, but no apology was given. Lucian simply washed the remainder of the soap off his hair with a stern, dogged expression.

 

The lump from before returned to the Vampire’s throat. This was nothing like the Lucian he knew. Maybe he had really gone too far?

 

//You should apologize// Viktor mentally told himself. //Your behaviour was childish and completely unacceptable. You hurt Lucian, and yet he refused to hurt you back, because he cares about you. You really should apologize, before this situation escalates and something bad happens. This was all your fault.//

 

Viktor had the words on his tongue, but he couldn’t speak them out loud. His pride still didn’t allow it. Instead he bit down on his tongue, waiting for Lucian to take the first step, even though that wasn’t likely to happen this time.

 

Lucian noticed the change in Viktor: the Elder had gone from furious back to melancholy. Oh, well… at least it meant that he probably wouldn’t struggle anymore. Their eyes met for a brief second, and Viktor quickly averted his from Lucian’s, lowering his gaze. To the Lycan’s surprise, he had seen strong signs of sadness and guilt. Lucian almost softened, his anger abating, but Viktor still owed him an apology this time, not vice versa.

 

Still not speaking, he reached down and lifted the wet Vampire into his arms. The water dripping from Viktor soaked his chest and the front of his pants, but it was no big deal. Lucian dried the Elder’s body with a large towel he’d found in the bedroom closet and figured he’d have to help Viktor dress, when it occurred to him: Viktor had no clothes to put on.

 

*~*~*

 

Later, when the mattress and the sheets had dried and Viktor was back in the now clean bed, things were still tense between him and Lucian. The Lycan had barely even spoken to him, and when it happened, Lucian’s voice was curt and his words abrupt and monosyllabic.

 

The Elder knew that he was to blame in this conflict, but still he waited for Lucian to approach him first. Viktor was just not used to apologizing and wanted to preserve what was left of his damaged pride.

 

He lay on his side with the bedpan within arm’s reach. Lucian had been very particular about having it available now, probably because he didn’t want to deal with another “accident”. It was past sunset, and the Elder had been lying in the bed for a good four hours. The newly washed sheets smelled of fresh air and pine, but there was one scent missing -- Lucian’s. The Lycan had not joined him in bed but simply dumped him there and left.

 

At first Viktor was scared that Lucian would exit the cabin altogether and leave him alone, but he’d heard the Lycan move around outside the closed door several times, so that fear had vanished. Still, knowing that Lucian did not want to see him caused a hollow feeling in the Elder’s chest.

 

His body was tired, but despite this he did not go to sleep. Facing the wall, he lay completely still and attentively listened for sounds that could indicate Lucian’s approach. Knowing that the Lycan couldn’t avoid him forever, he could only wait.

 

A few hours before dawn, Lucian returned. Viktor did not turn around to look at him when he heard him enter, nor did he initiate any conversation. He was well aware that this kind of behaviour would only deepen the cleft between them, but he was Viktor, and Viktor did not -- could not -- apologize.

 

Lucian instantly noticed that the Vampire wasn’t asleep despite pretending to be so. Viktor’s breathing and posture revealed that he was very awake and aware of Lucian’s presence. The Lycan sighed and quietly undressed, wondering if Viktor knew that *he* knew.

 

While the bed was wide enough for two people, they weren’t able to avoid physical contact, especially as they were sharing one blanket. The whole situation was becoming quite taxing to Lucian. Viktor depended on him, and the Lycan wouldn’t be able to avoid the Elder without neglecting him and his needs.

 

Viktor felt a heavy thud in the bed when Lucian slid down next to him and had to force back a reaction. He was tempted to turn around and nestle in the Lycan’s arms, but something held him back. The lump in his chest grew when Lucian did not initiate any bodily contact. No arm wrapped around his waist and no warm, furred body spooned against his back. Viktor admitted never being particularly partial to “cuddling” -- much less so than Lucian -- but with grief in his heart, the Vampire realized that he missed it terribly. Lucian had never refused to hold him before. It had to mean that his lover was truly angry with him.

 

To begin with, the Lycan rested on his back, but after a while he simply couldn’t stand seeing the Elder lying next to him and yet so aloof. So he turned his back to Viktor, hoping it would be easier if only he couldn’t see the other man.

 

Feeling Lucian turning away from him completely was the final straw. The Vampire began to weep silently, tears slowly seeping from his eyes and trickling down his pale cheeks. He bit down on his lip to quench the sobs that threatened to burst out, because Viktor did not want Lucian to know he was crying. It was partly due to his wounded pride, but also because he was too afraid not to receive any kind of response.

 

Until now, the phrase “crying oneself to sleep” had not meant much to the Elder, but his tears did not dry up until sleep finally claimed him.

 

Lucian heard his lover’s choked sobs and many a time considered turning around to envelop Viktor in a comforting embrace. He refrained from it for one reason: it would be the same as admitting that *he* was to blame in this conflict. Granted, this was not his first argument with the Elder, but every time until now, Lucian had been the one to take the first step and offer an apology. It would not happen this time. It was time for Viktor to come down a few notches and do his share.

 

 

Chapter 6

 

No apologies were given, and things remained frosty and beyond that between Viktor and the Lycan. The Elder’s initial grief and remorse quickly passed on to anger and defiance, and when he failed to get a response from Lucian, Viktor did his best to provoke one from him.

 

Doing everything to annoy and aggravate the already stressed Lycan, he noticed with ill-contained glee that his plan was working. Lucian had learned to master him temper well during his 600+ years on this earth, but the seemingly unnatural composure was nothing but an illusion, and Viktor could see through him like a window. Beneath the surface, Lucian was seething.

 

How had it come to be like this? Lucian was worn-out, both mentally and physically. Viktor was doing everything in his power, it seemed, to make things as difficult as possible for him, and the obstinate Vampire was really testing his patience. Some things were more subtle than other: a dropped glass, spilt water, an “accidental” fall out of bed… Viktor curtly dismissed them as accidents, but Lucian had not failed to grasp the malicious gleam in the other’s blue eyes.

 

Thirteen nights after their arrival at the cabin, the deer’s blood had been thoroughly spent, and there was no more to give to Viktor. Lucian knew that he had two options - either go out hunting or “donate” some of his own, but the Lycan did not feel like opening his veins for the Elder when he was like that.

 

Four nights, and they had barely spoken and not touched once in an intimate manner. Sex was out of the question, of course, and Lucian had to confess that he missed it more than he could have imagined. They lay in bed together but tried to avoid physical contact, mostly with their backs to each other. To Lucian it was a distraction having Viktor’s naked body so near and yet so far on another level. He was often tempted to reach down and touch himself when he was certain that the Vampire was asleep, but that would have been too humiliating. If Viktor woke up and caught him red-handed in the act… The mere thought made him shudder.

 

The Elder was bored and irritable. He’d been awake for over two hours, and so far all his attempts to provoke Lucian had been unsuccessful. The Lycan had dark rings of fatigue under his eyes and had not spoken one word or even looked directly at Viktor. It was obvious that Lucian was being pushed closer and closer to the breaking point and tried to use apathy to prevent it. This aggravated the Elder even more. He would not let the insolent Lycan pup treat him like air -- he deserved better than that!

 

Viktor knew the perfect way to provoke a real response from the Lycan. He drank all of the water contained in the large glass always standing on his bedside table, and waited. It didn’t take long for his bladder to fill up, and the pressing need to empty it wasn’t far behind. The Elder waited calmly; the bedpan was, as always, within his reach, but he was not going to use it this time.

 

His need became dire within half an hour, and when it became painful to hold back, Viktor simply relaxed his muscles and let his bladder empty itself. His bottom and thighs were numb to the warm wetness, but he could feel it with his hands when touching the mattress. The Elder felt satisfied in a twisted kind of way. He had done it! He’d wet the bed on purpose and was assured that an act like this would give him Lucian’s undivided attention.

 

He would not call for the Lycan; Lucian would notice it without his interference the next time he entered.

 

*~*~*

 

Lucian was almost surprised that Viktor had managed to stay calm and quiet for such a long time. He had noted the Elder’s earlier attempts to provoke him but was strongly determined not to let Viktor win this time. If the Vampire could not communicate in a proper way, they might as well not communicate at all. If he could hold on long enough, surely Viktor would come to his senses and stop acting like a spoiled little brat.

 

The Lycan decided to check in shortly past noon to see if Viktor needed anything. There was no more animal blood, but he could give the Vampire more water or empty his bedpan, if required.

 

Viktor was sitting upright in the bed, arms crossed over his chest. He had a smug look on his face, and his cold, pale-blue eyes glinted with furtive glee.

 

“Do you need anything?” Lucian asked wearily, hoping that they could at least communicate in a civil tone.

 

“And what would that be?” Viktor replied with mock interest. “Let’s see… There is no more blood, and I don’t believe you can offer me much besides that.”

 

“Shall I empty your bedpan?”

 

“No need for that, really. It’s empty.”

 

Lucian frowned confusedly, not really sure whether Viktor was being truthful or not. He had not emptied it since yesterday… and the water glass standing on the table was empty.

 

The sour smell of urine reached his nostrils almost the same moment, and the Lycan realized the obvious truth. He started shaking his head in denial, not aware of the action himself. Viktor had wet the bed -- AGAIN. Why?! No, it could not be true. It simply couldn’t!

 

Viktor gazed at the devastated Lycan, unable to hold back a scornful smile. “Oops, sorry,” he said in a singsong voice. “I think I had a little accident…”

 

Maybe it was Viktor’s facial expression, his voice, choice of words, or simply the situation itself that caused a dam to burst within Lucian, and he was no longer able to hold back his anger. Lunging forward, he jerked the bedcovers away and threw the empty bowl onto Viktor’s lap.

 

“It was right THERE, for fuck’s sake, Vampire!” he cried out, tearing his hands through his long hair. Lucian had not called Viktor by anything but his name in a long time, and his doing so now was a sign that a limit had been exceeded. “Why? Why did you do it? You did it on purpose! Why?! To aggravate me? Was that your reason, you dumb, spoiled, ego-centric bloodsucker?!”

 

Grabbing Viktor’s arms, he harshly jerked the Elder down from the bed and onto the floor. He did not notice the pained grimace on the Vampire’s face or the way Viktor cowered from him. All he could focus on was the large, wet spot of urine in the bed. With luminescent blue eyes, Lucian turned to Viktor. The Vampire was at an obvious disadvantage, being unable to move and counter the Lycan’s growing wrath.

 

“Answer me when I’m talking to you!” Lucian growled, stepping even closer to Viktor, who had his back pressed to the wall. There was a hint of fear in the Elder’s eyes, and the glee had completely disappeared from his face. This did not calm Lucian, however. The dam had burst, and his rush of fury could not be reversed. “Did you do it to provoke me, Viktor?” he asked again in a low-pitched, dangerous voice. “Well, you know what? You succeeded!”

 

Viktor realized that he had gone too far this time. Lucian was enraged, and his feral side was taking over. It stirred a fear within the Elder; the look on the Lycan’s face was one of complete and utter fury, and he looked capable of almost anything. It frightened him, because he had not seen Lucian like that… not since Sonja’s execution, which he’d forced Lucian to witness.

 

The Elder didn’t know how to counter the Lycan’s wrath except for lashing out himself. “Well, guess what, LYCAN! This is all your fault!” he shouted, his own eyes flashing blue, albeit not as severely as Lucian’s. “Why didn’t you just kill me, you bloody coward?! You should have finished me off instead of dragging me here to this… miserable existence! You’re so fucking weak, Lucian, and I hate you for it!”

 

At the end of the final sentence, Viktor’s voice broke, and he sounded like a dying animal being butchered.

 

Lucian reacted in a flash, and with a howl of fury, he grabbed Viktor’s upper arms and tossed the Vampire bodily back onto the bed with a force that made the walls reverberate. Pinning the shocked Elder with his own more substantial frame, he brought his face close to Viktor’s.

 

“How *dare* you speak like that to me, you wretched creature?” he hissed. “I saved your life -- I brought you somewhere safe, attended to your injuries, and I’ve been trying my hardest to make your “miserable existence” as tolerable as possible, and what do I get it return? Your perpetual whining and discontentment! I misjudged you, Viktor -- you are neither brave nor strong. I’ve done everything for you, and you’ve given me nothing but trouble in return. All you ever do is whine, but then again, it is what you’ve been doing for the past fourteen centuries, isn’t it? Nothing is ever good enough for you, and I’m certainly no exception. I’ve realized that now!”

 

Viktor would have slapped Lucian, if not the Lycan had been pinning his wrists to the bed. Instead of that, he spat Lucian clean in the face.

 

When the spittle hit him between the eyes, the Lycan lost whatever humanness he had left. Seeing blazing flashes beneath his eyelids, he reacted in blind, animalistic fury and backhanded Viktor hard across the face. Blood immediately sprung from the Vampire’s nose, and the blow left Viktor clearly dazed. Lucian’s fury was not abating.

 

“If you want to lie here and rot in your own piss, go right ahead! I will not remain in this cottage with you one minute longer!” He slammed Viktor against the mattress one more time and then got off him, spun around, and fled the cabin without as much as looking back over his shoulder.

 

Running off into the woods as if chased by some unknown foe, Lucian was too upset to even think clearly. He would need a few hours… many hours by himself to calm down.

 

*~*~*

 

Viktor was numb. His nose throbbed with a dull ache, and his arms were quite sore from Lucian’s rough treatment, but his mind was as numb as his lower body. He saw Lucian rush out and heard the sound of the front door slamming shut with a loud bang. Lucian had left. Viktor felt the blood trickling from his nose but didn’t bother to wipe it away.

 

// I will not remain in this cottage with you one minute longer!//

 

No, who would, really? He was a pathetic wreck, causing nothing but trouble. Lucian had genuinely loved and cared for him, but his damned pride and selfishness had ruined that as well. Now the Lycan had abandoned him, left him here to die a slow, torturous death of starvation. The worst thing was that Viktor could not really blame Lucian. His former lover had tried -- tried really hard -- with everything until his patience finally ran out.

 

The Elder made an estimate whether he could reach the blankets covering the window from the bed but quickly realized that any such attempt would be futile. There was simply no way to speed this up. He’d have to wait until his body died from lack of sustenance. Being an Elder, Viktor knew that it would take quite some time.

 

He lay still for a long while, resting on his side, head leaned against his arm. The small bedchamber smelled rank from urine. He would die rotting in his own piss, just as Lucian had said only seconds before he left.

 

The bowl he’d used as a bedpan had ended up on the bed only inches from the crippled Vampire’s hands. Viktor fixed his blank gaze on the object; he would have no further practical use for it, but the smooth, white porcelain might be able to offer him something else, albeit not in its current shape…

 

*~*~*

 

Lucian spent hours in the surrounding woods, walking around and trying to sort out his thoughts and emotions. It was not an easy task. He was terribly ashamed of himself and his earlier actions. He had hurt Viktor. He’d hit his crippled lover, brutalized him physically and verbally, for something as trivial as some urine in the bed. If Viktor hated him now, it was the Elder’s complete prerogative. Lucian had done something unforgivable.

 

He wandered the woods for hours, trying to come up with even a half-decent excuse for his behaviour, but all his tries were unsuccessful. No matter how one biased the past events, the blame fell on him.

 

The urge to transform grew huge at times; it was tempting just to become an animal in body and at heart and forget the troubles that were tormenting his human self. But no, he would not do it. He would not choose the easy way out. Becoming a beast was just a temporary relief, anyway, and Lucian knew that he’d have to face his problems once he returned to human.

 

If only he knew what to say to Viktor! Any apology or explanation sounded so… lame. He could go down to his bare knees and beg for forgiveness, and the Elder might still reject him. Viktor’s pride was more fragile than any glass in the world, and Lucian had virtually shattered it. It was not something that Viktor would take lightly, even in his vulnerable and exposed position.

 

Lucian realized that he feared such a rejection more than anything in the world. He feared it so much that he briefly considered not returning in person but instead making an anonymous phone-call to Ordoghaz and telling the Vampires where to find their missing Elder.

 

But no… It would be a cowardly thing to do, and the Lycan leader was no coward. He would return…

 

When he noticed that the sky was brightening, it struck him that he’d been out the entire night. And Viktor was still left in a bed wet with urine, inside a small, dark room, smelling rank.

 

He had to get back. The prospect of facing the Elder now was more than a little daunting, but he had to go back to see if Viktor needed anything. The Vampire was all but helpless, and Lucian was his only security.

 

As he made his way back toward the cabin, an ominous feeling started growing within him. It was as if his gut told him that something was horribly, terribly wrong… although he couldn’t place what it was.

 

Growing more and more anxious, he sped up, wanting to reach the cabin and make sure that Viktor was alright as quickly as possible.

 

The front door was unlocked, just as he’d left it, and everything outside as well as in looked exactly as when he left, many hours ago.

 

The door to the bedroom was closed, and he heard no sounds coming from inside. “Viktor…?” the Lycan called tentatively, not wanting to frighten the Elder in case he was asleep. Lucian received no reply and slowly inched closer to the door. Putting his ear to it, he knocked and said in a low, gentle voice, “Viktor? Are you awake? I’m really sorry about before, I don’t know what got into me… I hope you can be able to forgive me, despite all… Can I come in?”

 

With all his senses at full stretch, Lucian nervously waited for a response. Many seconds passed, and still he heard nothing. Was the Elder really sleeping that soundly? To the Lycan’s knowledge, Viktor had always been a light sleeper, and the soft knocking alone should have been enough to awaken him.

 

“Viktor…?”

 

He slowly pressed the doorknob down and pushed the door open. He just had to see that Viktor was alright, even if the Vampire never wanted to see his face again. At least it would ease his concern.

 

The sight that greeted him almost made his heart stop in his chest. The covers had been flung back, and the sheets were now coloured red with blood. Bloodied porcelain shards from something that had once been a white bowl were on the floor and on the bed, surrounding the naked, pale body lying in the middle of everything. Viktor.

 

“NOOOOOO!” The cry leaving Lucian’s throat was more inhuman than a transformed Lycan’s howling during full moon. He was by Viktor’s side in a flash, pulling the Vampire’s lifeless form into his arms and desperately pressing his hands to the grizzly cuts in both of Viktor’s wrists in an attempt to stop the bleeding. Blood was still pumping out of the Elder in rhythm with his weakening heartbeats.

 

“No… Please!” Lucian began sobbing desperately; everything was so clear, and yet he couldn’t understand or accept it. Viktor had crushed the bedpan and used the shards to slit his own wrists. Now the Elder was bleeding out, slipping away from Lucian as he watched, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

 

Not knowing what else to do, Lucian tore a few stripes of fabric from the sheets and tied them around Viktor’s wrists as an improvised tourniquet. The crimson blood quickly soaked through the white fabric, and Lucian’s despair grew by the second. The cuts were long and deep: Viktor had made sure of that when he sliced himself. Having lost so much blood, it was a miracle that his heart was still beating.

 

//But for how long…?//

 

“Viktor… Please, don’t die! Don’t leave me…” the Lycan sobbed incoherently, cradling the other man’s far too pale body to his own. This was all his fault. Why did he storm out like that and leave the Vampire alone for hours? He knew how hapless and depressed Viktor was… although he never would have guessed the Elder to be suicidal. Why? Why had he not seen it? How could he have been so… ignorant and insensitive?  

 

Bringing his face down to the Vampire’s, he kissed the practically livid lips, as if trying to give the Elder some of his own life-force. Lucian was almost shocked to see Viktor’s eyes opening and the Vampire trying to focus his weak, unsteady gaze. A small sigh left Viktor’s half-open mouth: a sign that he had noticed Lucian’s presence.

 

“Viktor… Oh, God…” The Lycan kissed the Elder’s face again, holding him up with one hand and keeping the other at his throat, terrified to lose the faint pulse he could feel now.

 

“Lucian…” the Vampire whispered through his dry, aching airways. “I’m sorry…”

 

“No, no!” Lucian exclaimed vehemently. “It’s alright! You’re going to be alright… I promise. Just hang on…”

 

Viktor’s head fell back a little, and he opened his mouth, as if trying to smile. “Lucian… There’s something I have to tell you… I should have said something a long time ago…”

 

The words were barely more than whispers, but the Lycan had no trouble grasping them. Viktor was dying; he knew this himself and these were going to be his final words. Except the Vampire never got to say them. His eyes rolled back and the lids softly closed, another sigh leaving his parted lips.

 

Lucian reacted without thinking. It was only a matter of minutes, maybe seconds now. He let go of Viktor only to snatch a porcelain shard from the bed. The sharp piece cut into his palm, but he barely felt the pain. With trembling hands slippery with blood and sweat, he placed the shard to his left wrist and made a shallow, vertical cut into the largest artery. Blood immediately welled out from the cut, and without hesitation, the Lycan placed his wrist mere centimetres above Viktor’s face, letting the precious life-fluid pour into the Vampire’s mouth.

 

//Oh, please, God… let this work… Please…//

 

The cut he had inflicted on himself was in no way life-threatening, but just a small drop of Viktor’s saliva in his bloodstream was. Therefore he had to be extra careful so as not to bring his bleeding wrist in direct contact with the Elder’s lips. If he contracted the deadly virus from the Vampire, there was no point in doing this, as Viktor’s survival depended on his.

 

All the while keeping his other hand pressed to the Elder’s throat to monitor his pulse, Lucian waited for results. This could not replace all the blood Viktor had lost, but hopefully it would be enough to keep him alive. The bleeding from his wrists had abated but not ceased; the red spots on the bandages still growing.

 

Lucian continued until he started feeling dizzy and cold sweat broke out all over his body. It was time to stop… He knew it, yet there had been no noticeable change in Viktor… He had donated more than a litre, and it was taking its toll on him. Soon he had to stop, or he would weaken himself too much.

 

Withdrawing his wrist from the Elder’s mouth was the hardest thing Lucian had done in a long time, but he had no choice. The wound still bled, and he wrapped a piece of the sheet around his own forearm, as well, hoping it would stop the bleeding.

 

A few drops of blood had stained Viktor’s pale lips, making his livid skin look even whiter. The Lycan’s heart was pounding in his chest, and he hardly dared to move in fear of missing a vital change in the Elder’s condition. Viktor was still unconscious, but his heartbeats were stronger and more regular than before, so it had to mean that his condition was improving. Hopefully he was no longer in danger of losing his life. Viktor was an Elder; he was strong, although he had suffered extensive blood loss.

 

Lucian sat still for several minutes, holding on to the Vampire’s form almost spasmodically. Viktor showed no signs of reviving, and Lucian realized that it would probably take a while. The Lycan’s own blood loss had made him dizzy and nauseated, but he could not rest here… Not in this filthy, soiled bed, or in this room, reeking of sour urine mixed with the tangy, metallic scent of blood.

 

But he could not leave Viktor either, and since it was day, moving the Vampire was impossible.

 

Like hell it was.

 

The Lycan carefully disentangled from the Elder’s body and went to cover the living room windows with blankets and drapes, just as he had done with the one in the bedroom. It was a slightly more challenging task, considering the size of the windows and the fact that he had two to worry about. Lucian, however, was determined, and once he had the panes of glass fully covered, he was confident that no harmful UV rays could slip through.

 

Re-entering the bedroom, he lifted Viktor into his arms and slowly carried the unconscious Vampire into the now safe living room. Seating himself on the sofa, Lucian let Viktor’s upper body rest on his lap and covered the Elder with the last remaining blanket. His lover’s breathing was steady and strong: a sign that Viktor’s body was recovering.

 

Lucian stroked the Vampire’s soft, fine locks and massaged the other’s scalp with his fingertips. Having understood that the immediate danger was over, he finally allowed his tears to flow. Unlike Viktor, Lucian had never seen weeping as a sign of weakness. Rather it was a relief; a way to cleanse his mind of unwanted emotions and thoughts.

 

Sobbing freely, he pulled Viktor even closer and rested his forehead against the Elder’s cheek. His tears dampened the other’s pallid - but no longer livid - skin, trickling down Viktor’s high cheekbones like crystal drops.

 

“Viktor…” the Lycan whispered, his voice high-pitched and thick. “Why did you do it…? Do you understand how close it was…?”

 

A few more minutes, and Viktor would have been dead. The thought shook Lucian to the core. He’d arrived just in time, and it had to be due to something more than dumb luck. It was… Fate.

 

Lucian was hungry and thirsty, but he ignored his own needs and steadfastly remained seated on the sofa with Viktor in his arms until the Elder finally revived. His eyelids opened, exposing dazed and confused blue eyes, and a small groan left his throat.

 

Viktor couldn’t remember anything that happened since he sliced his wrists and lay down, waiting for the blood loss to kill him. As the world slowly cleared before his eyes, he could feel the closeness of a solid, warm body… Lucian?

 

“Viktor?” the Lycan’s breathless voice whispered in his ear, and the moment after a bearded face tenderly nuzzled his cheek.

 

“Lucian…” Viktor croaked, trying to focus his eyes on the other man. So Lucian had come back, after all. With shame in his heart, the Vampire realized that it was more than he deserved. He owed the Lycan not only his life, but a true, heartfelt apology.

 

“I’m here… Everything is alright, now…” Lucian said immediately, not wanting the weakened Vampire to exert himself needlessly. Even talking had to be a grim ordeal for Viktor right now. “Here… have some water.” Lucian brought a glass of water to the Elder’s lips and lifted his head so that he could sip the fluid without choking.

 

The water coated Viktor’s dry throat like silk, despite the fact that it was not warm blood. He gratefully drank a few mouthfuls and signalled with his head when he did not want more. “Oh, Lucian… I’m so sorry…” the Vampire murmured ruefully, lifting his hands to regard the bloodied bandages wrapped around both wrists. “You were right… about everything… I cause you nothing but trouble, after all…”

 

Lucian listened to Viktor’s remorseful words; only a few hours ago he’d craved to hear them, but the circumstances were different now. “You don’t have to be sorry, Viktor,” he quietly replied. “I’m the one who should ask for your forgiveness. I never should have acted the way I did, and… left. But tell me… why did you do it? I never figured you’d be the type who…”

 

“When you rushed out…” Viktor began, “I believed you were gone for good, that you weren’t coming back. I guess I deserved it… but I wanted to end my life some other way than… you know.”

 

The Lycan was shocked at the revelation. “You really believed that… I would just leave you?”

 

“I did…” Viktor confessed truthfully. “Especially after what you said about not wanting to remain with me in this cottage one minute longer.”

 

“Did I really say that?” Lucian murmured, appalled by his own choice of words. “Yes, maybe I did… but I never meant it, I was just so angry. Oh, God… I still can’t believe I almost lost you because of this!”

 

“You haven’t lost me. I’m still here… thanks to you,” Viktor said, wrapping his arms around Lucian’s neck and embracing his lover hard. The Lycan hugged him back, although Lucian’s touch was over-gentle, as if he feared the Elder to be fragile and break in his arms. They parted after a long while, and the Lycan kissed Viktor’s forehead, keeping an arm wrapped around his back.

 

“We really have to talk, Viktor,” Lucian said seriously. “About us, and this whole situation. We simply cannot remain here any longer. It’s wearing us out, both physically and mentally. We have to come to a decision on how to proceed from here.”

 

The Vampire regarded Lucian with a questioning, slightly doubtful expression.

 

The Lycan sighed. “If you want me to take you back to Ordoghaz, I will, Viktor. You only have to let me know.”

 

But to Lucian’s surprise, Viktor shook his head almost violently. “No,” he said curtly. “I’m not going back there. Not ever. My time at Ordoghaz has come to an end. I can’t return there like this, only to become a burden, unable to take care of myself, completely at the mercy of others.”

 

“But… Viktor, they’re your people…”

 

“It doesn’t matter, Lucian! I won’t return to the Coven!”

 

Lucian nodded, not knowing what else to do. If Viktor decided upon something, changing his mind was difficult, if not impossible. The news came as a bit of a shock, but once he thought more closely about it, it actually made sense. Ruling the Coven from a wheelchair was not an attractive conception to the proud Elder, and Viktor had always cringed from humiliation.

 

“Alright, so where will you go instead?” Lucian asked matter-of-factly. Due to his paralysis, the Vampire would be dependent on others for the rest of his life, and if he didn’t trust his fellow Vampires to take care of him, then…

 

“I don’t know, Lucian, but…” Viktor let the sentence trail off, unsure of how to phrase his message.

 

“What?” Lucian asked gently. “It’s alright, you can tell me.”

 

After taking a deep breath and biting down on his bottom lip, the Vampire found the strength to continue. “I was hoping to stay with you. We could leave our old lives behind and move somewhere far away where nobody knows who we are or what kind of problems we have.”

 

Lucian closed his eyes, wishing he had not heard what Viktor just said. It pained him beyond belief, knowing that he had to refuse the Elder’s request, but he might as well be honest from the beginning. That was the least Viktor deserved.

 

“It’s a lovely dream, Viktor, but I’m sorry to say that it’s all it is. I love you, but I can’t abandon *my* people. They rely on me for leadership, and I just can’t fail them after 600 years.”

 

The Vampire held back a disappointed sigh, although Lucian’s response hardly came as a surprise. The Lycan had very strong sense of duty, and asking him to abandon his Lycan brethren was too great a sacrifice to ask of him.

 

“Not even for me?” Viktor asked.

 

“No,” Lucian replied ruefully. “Not even for you, my dear Viktor.”

 

“Then take me with you.”

 

The unexpected words and the message behind them made Lucian wonder if his ears weren’t deceiving him. “What did you just say…?”

 

“I think you heard me. If you can’t abandon your kind, then bring me to them. At least I can still be with you.”

 

Lucian shook his head, flabbergasted that Viktor could even think such thoughts. It was impossible… The Elder would not survive an hour in the Lycan lair!

 

“Viktor, no matter how much I’d like you with me at all times, I’m afraid that what you’re asking cannot be done… Have you any idea how my pack would react if I brought you to the den?”

 

“They’re loyal to you, right? If you tell them to leave me be, surely they won’t defy your orders,” Viktor said with a shrug. “Really, Lucian, you have two choices. Either you take me with you or you kill me. It’s that simple.”

 

The Lycan’s face fell, and the Elder smiled. “You can’t kill me -- you’ve already proven that -- so that only leaves one choice, doesn’t it?”

 

“Viktor… you don’t know what you’re asking for…”

 

“Maybe I don’t… but I don’t have a lot of options.”

 

“This is serious, Viktor. If you think I can stop a whole pack of vengeful Lycans from ripping you to pieces, you’re mistaken…”

 

“Do I get a vote?” Viktor asked defensively. “It’s my life at risk, after all.”

 

“…BUT if you’re willing to go along with this madness, I’ll be by your side.”

 

The Elder’s eyes lit up. “Really, Lucian?”

 

“Yes,” the Lycan said with a small smile and caught Viktor’s chin between his thumb and forefinger. “As long as you remember one thing, my dear Vampire… In my dominion, you will live by *my* rules. Understand?”

 

“I can live with that,” the Elder admitted a trifle reluctantly. He was used to creating rules, not following others’, but then again -- his time as a Vampire Overlord was past.

 

“Good. Let’s just hope my pack lets you live long enough to prove that.”

 

 

Epilogue

 

Almost thirteen weeks had passed since the ill-fated night in the forest when a bullet shattered Viktor’s spine and -- literally -- his life. Lucian had kept his promise and brought the Elder with him to the Lycan hideout, where Viktor had spent the past ten weeks of his existence, mostly locked inside Lucian’s -- and now his -- bedchamber for his own safety.

 

Viktor knew that every Lycan in the lair except Lucian wanted him dead. The pack had reluctantly followed their Alpha’s orders and agreed to have him there, supposedly because the crippled Vampire did not compose any threat to them. Their intense hatred of him remained, though, and it was evident in every fibre of their beings. Nothing would bring Lucian’s pack more joy than the chance to rip the Vampire Elder to pieces, limb by limb.

 

Oddly, Viktor did not live in fear. He trusted Lucian and knew that the Lycan leader would protect him from his ferocious brethren. Having a busy schedule, Lucian could not afford spending every night with his chosen mate, but when he had time, he made sure to spend it with the Vampire and make Viktor’s monotonous life as bearable as possible. They would talk, play games, drink together, and perhaps watch a movie or take a hot, relaxing bath before moving to spend the day in the Lycan’s large bed.

 

They made love a few times a week, and it surprised Viktor how gentle his normally rough Lycan lover had become. All Lucian’s touches, strokes, and thrusts were soft and loving, not feral and possessive, as they used to be. The Elder was not sure he liked the change, especially as he knew the reason for it: he was crippled, and Lucian was afraid of hurting him.

 

This night Viktor was going to be lonely. It was long past midnight, and he had not seen Lucian since the previous morning. The Lycan had promised his mate that he would return after sundown, but Viktor realized that it might not happen. Lucian had so many important matters to deal with, and the Elder knew that keeping a crippled Vampire company was not among the most important.

 

Lucian had made sure that he had all the necessary conveniences: a fully manoeuvrable wheelchair, enough cloned blood in the refrigerator, an easily accessible bathroom, and things that could help him bide his time, including books, magazines, a box full of DVDs, and so on.

 

Still, Viktor felt trapped. He longed to leave the underground den full of people who hated him and feel the wind in his face. Lucian had only taken him outside once since their arrival here, and it was over six weeks ago. While the size of the chamber with its adjacent kitchen and bathroom were quite generous by Lycan standards, the Vampire had started to feel like a caged animal.

 

The Elder was sitting in his wheelchair, reading a novel Lucian had recently brought him: “Angels and Demons”, by Dan Brown. It was an intriguing and lucid story, but Viktor could not quite focus on his reading. He was weary and would have preferred his lover’s embrace to the hardcover edition he was holding.

 

He was able to move into bed from his wheelchair unaided but was still hoping for Lucian to return before the weariness overwhelmed him. Rubbing his eyes, the Vampire gave up on the novel and put it away. Perhaps some classical music could help revive him?

 

Wheeling over to the table where he’d left the stereo remote, Viktor was just reaching for it when he heard the sound of the door being opened. Joy instantly filled his heart and he quickly manoeuvred his wheelchair to meet Lucian, only it wasn’t his lover. Stopping in mid-track, the horrified Elder found himself staring up at Raze, Lucian’s ever-faithful second-in-command.

 

The huge black man entered the room and closed the door behind him. The expression on his face was unreadable, but his dark eyes betrayed his intense hatred of the creature before him.

 

Viktor felt nothing but pure terror when the big Lycan slowly advanced toward him. He knew that he was completely defenceless against the monstrous brute; if Raze decided to tear his throat out this very moment, he was powerless to prevent it.

 

Raze was the first to speak. “So this is where you squat, you wretched, despicable Blood!” he hissed, his voice a menacing mixture of barely-contained fury and scorn. “Not that I didn’t know, but I just had to see for myself.”

 

“H-how did you g-get in here..?” Viktor stuttered, failing miserably to keep the fear out of his voice.

 

Raze snorted and took another step toward the Vampire. “Lucian has given me the entry code, in case of an emergency,” he replied. “Not that it’s any of your business, Vampire.”

 

“Get out!” Viktor said, trying his best to make his voice steady and firm. “You have no right to be in here!”

 

Raze just gave him a predatory smile. “No right? I believe I have every right. You’re someone who’s spent over half a millennium hunting down and slaying my species. Surely no one will look twice if I do what every one of my brethren is thinking -- take vengeance upon you for the torment and misery you and your kind has caused me and mine.”

 

Now Raze was standing less than three feet away. The Elder figured that a humble attitude could have spared him some agony, but if Raze had come to kill him, what was the point? If he was going to die, he might as well show some dignity.

 

With an enraged growl and a sweep of his massive arm, the black Lycan knocked the Elder’s wheelchair to the ground, and Viktor landed prone on his side, unable to keep his face from hitting the hard floor. The moment after, a huge hand closed around his throat like a vice and started lifting him up. Viktor struggled weakly, but it was no use. Raze’s grip was squeezing his airways shut, choking him.

 

After holding the crippled bloodsucker effortlessly in the air for a few seconds, Raze slammed Viktor into a wall and noticed with great pleasure the pained grimace on the other’s face. Oh, he’d get more joy out of this than he could ever have imagined!

 

In a final attempt to break the hold, the Elder grew claws and buried them in the Lycan’s thick forearm. It aggravated rather than hurt the massive beast, and Raze pulled him back to repeat his earlier action, only much harder this time. The impact dazed Viktor, who was rendered semi-conscious, and his hands fell limply to his sides.

 

“Stupid Blood!” Raze snarled, his own claws and canines fully elongated. “Do you want this to be quick or must I make you suffer?!”

 

The Vampire fought to focus his slightly blurred gaze. “So what will you do now?” he asked. “Rape me?”

 

“Fuck you? No.” Raze smiled coldly. “There are two kinds of people I don’t fuck -- males and Bloods. Now, Lucian can do as he pleases with men as far as I’m concerned. I don’t have a problem with that. YOU, however… I have a problem with you. Can you give me one good reason why I shouldn’t just snap your miserable neck right here and now?”

 

“Lucian…” Viktor wheezed, his abused windpipe protesting beneath Raze’s iron hold. “Lucian loves me… If you kill me, you will cause him grief…”

 

Raze clenched his teeth and the Vampire could see the man’s mental struggle with himself. Pleased that he had struck a nerve, Viktor continued. “For Lucian’s sake… You care about him. I know you do… and he cares about me…”

 

“Just because he spills his cock in your dead ass doesn’t mean he loves you!” Raze spat back. “You are nothing but a plaything to him, something he can have fun with when he’s got a few hours off! Nothing more! If you truly believe he loves you, you’re more of a fool than I thought!”

 

“You can say what you want… but it won’t change the truth. Lucian does love me. And you don’t want to make him sad, do you?”

 

Despite the bloodthirsty urge to kill the Vampire, Raze grudgingly had to admit that Viktor was right. Lucian had some kind of relationship with the wretched creature and slaying him would affect the Lycan leader negatively.

 

“Plead for your life, and I will not kill you. I’m not a liar,” the black Lycan said coldly, further tightening his hold.

 

“Alright… Please, Raze… I beg you, don’t kill me…” Viktor didn’t hesitate a second. He did not want to die, and he’d firmly decided never to let his pride ruin things for him again. If pleading with the beast could spare his life, then so be it.

 

Raze was almost disappointed that he’d gotten it out of the Vampire so easily. This was really nothing like the imperious, haughty Vampire Lord who used to love himself above everything else. The urge to end his life was still great, but he’d given Viktor his promise and had to keep it.

 

With a growl, the feral Lycan dropped the crippled Vampire, who fell into a heap on the floor, clutching his abused throat. It was a pitiful sight… and Raze would not waste any more time on such an unworthy opponent.

 

“I suppose Lucian will finish you off himself when he tires of you,” he said condescendingly and glared down at the Elder. “Until then… let’s just hope you can please him as well as you seem to think!”

 

Raze spun around and started striding back toward the door when Viktor suddenly called his name. “Raze!”

 

The black man stopped and looked back over his shoulder without speaking.

 

“Please… help me up,” the hapless Vampire pleaded. “I can’t get up by myself, and Lucian will be suspicious if he finds me like this…”

 

Without a word, Raze turned back, grabbed the Vampire roughly, and more or less threw him back into the rickety-looking wheelchair. The thick steel-door slammed shut behind him when he left, and Viktor was alone once again.

 

For several minutes, the Elder simply sat there. His heart was finally beginning to slow down, and he could almost breathe normally. Knowing that he’d been in death’s grasp only minutes ago was still incomprehensible. Raze had let him live. Why? Was it for Lucian’s sake?

 

With a trembling hand, he touched his sore throat. Surely Raze’s brutal treatment had left bruises and claw-marks, and a bump in the back of his head. He could probably find a way to explain the latter to Lucian, but…

 

Viktor slowly moved his wheelchair to the bed, hefted his body over, and started the cumbersome process of getting undressed by himself. Lucian usually helped him, but his lover was not around now. Too shaken to fold the clothes, he simply dumped them on the floor. The Elder managed to get his paralysed lower body in under the covers and pulled them up all the way to his chin. He could only hope that the bruises had faded until Lucian returned.

 

Sleeping turned out to be impossible. Once the shock released its immediate hold on him, Viktor started crying softly, wetting the pillow with his tears. He hated his life, and still he did not want it to end… especially as he’d just been given a second chance. The Vampire cried until his meagre body was spent and emptied. Then he finally managed to fall asleep with swollen, blood-shot eyes and dried tears on his cheeks.

 

Viktor was not awake to notice the soft bump in the bed and the gentle touch of his lover, who had not failed to notice the wet pillow or the red rills left by tears on the Elder’s face. Pulling the sleeping Vampire into his arms and hugging him against his chest, Lucian murmured, “My poor Viktor… what am I going to do with you…?”

 

The End