Title: Every Dog Has Its Day

Author: Henrika

Pairing: Viktor/Lucian

Rating: PG

Summary: Lucian watches Dark Angel and compares his relationship with Viktor to Max and Joshua. Short and silly.

Disclaimer: I own neither Underworld nor Dark Angel: they belong to their respective creators. Please don’t sue - I’m poor anyways.

Notes: My two current obsessions are Underworld and Dark Angel, and this is a lame attempt to combine themes from both fandoms. Not really a cross-over… just plain silly!  :)

*~*~*

It was Friday evening, and Lucian was - as always - comfortably seated in front of the TV with a popcorn bowl in his lap. His favourite TV show was on, and he refused to miss an episode no matter what went on in the outside world. Fridays from 10 to 11 PM, the Lycan lord got his weekly dose of Dark Angel.

Having followed the show religiously since the pilot episode, Lucian was difficult to distract while Dark Angel was on. Viktor still did his best, gliding up behind his seated lover and placing his long-fingered hands on Lucian’s shoulders.

Annoyed, the Lycan tried to shake the Vampire’s hands away, but as usual, Viktor would have none of it and pressed Lucian further down. Damn, why did the Elder have to be so insistent and… strong?

“I want you in the bedroom…” Viktor hissed in a low, seductively dangerous voice, leaning over and bringing his deadly, fanged mouth to Lucian’s ear.

“I’ll be there in… 33 minutes,” the Lycan replied absentmindedly after a quick glance at the wall-clock.

Viktor did not like to be rejected, even if it was just temporarily. In fact, he *hated* it. Tangling his hand in Lucian’s hair, he pulled sharply. “Not in 33 minutes, or even one - now!” he commanded, using his imperious Coven-Elder voice to confirm his message.

“You know, I’m working really hard to respect my Elders, but don’t push your luck!” Lucian grinned, tilting his head to regard Viktor’s irate, upside-down face. A puzzled frown replaced the look of annoyance before the Lycan made a quick move, grabbing Viktor’s neck and flinging the regal, haughty Vampire bodily onto the sofa, where he landed on his back with a thud.

“Ahhh…!”

Lucian couldn’t suppress an amused giggle. “If you can’t be without me, join me here, but try to stay quiet!”

Viktor straightened up, brushing his now tousled hair back with an indignant look on his face. Then he gave Lucian his killer stare. “You are *so* going to get yours this night, insolent pup!” he growled menacingly. Lucian, however, wasn’t affected.

“I said shut up, didn’t I? I’m watching this.”

Viktor threw a furtive glance at the TV screen. “You’re watching this?” he mocked. “A show with… monsters?” he asked scornfully when a very large man with long, brown hair and a weird, dog-like face appeared in the TV. It looked almost like a Lycan that had gotten stuck between its human and wolven form. “What’s that thing supposed to be? A werewolf?”

Lucian shook his head, clicking his tongue patronizingly. “That’s Joshua!” he said. “He’s not a werewolf, you donkey! He’s a dog-man. He was spliced together in a secret government lab out of human and canine DNA. And that…” He pointed to a slender, dark-haired female who was seemingly human. “…is Max. Joshua is her guard dog, kind of. He looks after her.” The Lycan grinned again. “They’re a bit like you and me, I guess!”

Viktor’s face became a mixture of offence and disgust. “Tell me you did not mean that,” he snorted. “I don’t need a filthy, mangy animal to “look after me”!”

“Hey, neither Joshua nor I is mangy, and Max can take care of herself just as well as you can, my dear Elder! But we all need a hand, sometimes. I used to protect you from those rogue Lycans, didn’t I?” Lucian’s tone softened and he crept closer to the rigid Vampire, reaching out to brush a lock of blond hair from the Elder’s high forehead.

“Yes… until you became one yourself!” Viktor retorted, still gnarly.

Lucian pretended not to hear. “It’s just canine protectiveness, Viktor. I want you in one piece, little fella*!” He wrapped his arm around the Vampire’s neck, pulling Viktor into a rather awkward and uncomfortable embrace, and the Elder scoffed, wrestling the playful Lycan off him.

“’Little fella’?” Viktor sneered. “Unless I misremembered, *I* am the taller of us two!”

“Not when I’m in my… other shape,” Lucian countered with a wry grin. “When I’m changed, I can loom over you!”

Viktor tried to smack his annoying lover over the head, but his arm was caught by Lucian before reaching its target, and another, half-serious struggle erupted. The popcorn bowl in Lucian’s lap got tipped over, spilling the popcorns all over the sofa and the Lycan’s legs.

“Now look what you did!” he growled, pushing Viktor away. “Go away! I’m still trying to follow this. Can you mayhap wait for 25 minutes?”

“No…” was the Vampire’s answer, and Viktor slowly began to unbutton his shirt, thinking it was the only way to get the Lycan’s undivided attention.

“I see what you’re doing, but it’s not helping,” Lucian stated calmly without taking his eyes off the TV screen.

“What? Do I need to unbutton my pants as well?!” The Elder snarled, getting more frustrated by the second.

“Patience, little fella…” Lucian sighed. “That’s something you’re in dire need of.”

Finis

* In Dark Angel, “Little fella” is Joshua’s nickname for Max.