Title: Great Minds Think Alike

Author: Henrika

Rating: PG-13/R… not sure

Pairings: (implied) Lucian/Max, Lucian/Viktor, Viktor/Kraven

Summary: What happens when two people want the same thing at the same time?

Notes: Written to go with the Max vs. Viktor fight pic. Not to be taken seriously!

*~*~*

Viktor sneaked into the dark hotel room quiet and unnoticed, peeled off his clothing in no time, and crept toward the large double bed with a goofy grin on his face. He’d seen Lucian leave the hotel almost an hour ago and decided to surprise his former lover by waiting for him stark naked in bed.

Granted, the Lycan had said it was over -- several times -- but Viktor was confident that not even Lucian would refuse an offer like this.

He slipped down between the sheets and stretched his long, supple body in a cat-like manner, sighing contentedly. Everything was perfect, until--

*

Max gave a startled cry when an equally nude body -- definitely not Lucian’s -- bumped into hers and pulled her out of her cosy reverie. The person in question cried out too, obviously as startled as she, and they flew themselves off the bed at exactly the same moment.

The initial shock of having found the bed occupied by someone other than Lucian quickly passed, and Viktor’s blood began boiling when he laid eyes on the X5. What the hell was *she* doing in Lucian’s bed?! How could the Lycan choose that lousy minx over *him*?

Even though the room was dark, they could see each other more than well, as both were gifted with night vision.

“What the hell are you doing here?!” Viktor growled, shooting daggered looks at the equally pissed-off female.

“*I*? I was about to ask you that same question!” Max shouted back, too furious to even think about the fact that she was naked and uncovered -- as was the Vampire.

“Well, it doesn’t matter!” Viktor spat. “I want you and your…” He poked the heap of Max’s clothes lying by the bed with his foot. “…sadomasochistic leather rags out of this room before I throw you out of the window myself!”

Max could see that the furious Elder was no doubt serious about his threats, but she was a girl who’d never been easily intimidated, and this case was no exception. “Oh, yeah? Not if I throw you out first!”

Her self-confident and obnoxious attitude made Viktor -- if possible -- even angrier. She had ruined his entire night and was going to pay for that!

“I’d come over there and rip your head off right now, but I don’t want to make a mess in Lucian’s room!” he snarled, baring his elongated fangs.

“Bring it on!” the X5 called and instinctively struck a fighting pose, raising her balled fists in front of her. Viktor hardly believed his own eyes. The bitch was *challenging* him? Him?? Genetically empowered or not, she couldn’t seriously think she could stand any chance against him -- an ancient Vampire warlord! The female obviously had some serious ego-issues!

Sneering at her, the Vampire struck a similar pose, and the two combatants began circling each other on the floor of the hotel room.

“Just so you know, if you break something, we’ll be sending you the bill!” Max said just before Viktor lashed out and tried to land a punch on her face. She blocked his hits, using her flash-like X5 speed, and slammed her own fist into his eye, causing him to back one step. It wasn’t a hard blow, at least not by their superhuman standards, but it was more than enough to further infuriate the Vampire.

The mutant bitch had hit him! And it *hurt*! In truth, Viktor’s ego stung more than his face, and he was not going to let her get away unpunished. Striking again, he managed to clip her this time, but she counter-attacked and landed a vicious kick to his shin.

Max could hardly believe what was happening. She had come here to surprise Lucian, crept into his bed, and made herself comfortable while waiting for her new and enigmatic lover to return, and now she was fighting buck-naked with the Lycan’s jealous, lethal, and severely pissed-off ex? Who was doing *what exactly* in Lucian’s room?? This could simply not be happening! If not Max had known she never slept, she would have believed this to be one big bad dream.

The fight went on for sometime, and Viktor hated to admit that the prissy little transgenic was holding her own against him. She was fast and sneaky and able to deflect most of his strikes. A well-trained fighter, like himself.

The Vampire’s ribs protested when Max’s foot slammed hard into his chest, knocking him back against a wall, which creaked from the impact. The X5 approached him from the front and started to kick, but this time he caught her foot and twisted it, sending her spinning to the floor.

Max landed on all fours with innate feline grace and looked up to see the triumphant Vampire sneering down at her as he prepared for his next attack. She reacted in a flash and with a quick sweep of her foot, she took out Viktor’s legs from under him.

The surprised Elder landed on his back with a thud. “You bitch…!” he gasped in a mixture of anger and shock, flexing his muscles for a new strike. Now he wanted nothing rather than snap the little minx’s neck with his bare hands!

Viktor hurled up, attempting to kick Max from the ground. The X5, however, saw the attack coming and threw herself straight at the Vampire before he could reach her. Taken by surprise yet again, Viktor was once more thrown onto his back with the enraged female straddling his hips. Max started pummelling him immediately, landing blow after blow on his face, shoulders, and upper chest, not wanting to give him a chance to strike back.

When the blows started hailing over him -- the transgenic hit hard! -- Viktor instinctively lashed out to shield himself from the raging wildcat’s fury. He clipped her face hard, throwing her off him with a single blow, and wasn’t slow to roll around and reverse their roles.

Max punched Viktor clean in the face when he got on top of her, but he simply wrinkled his nose and spat out some bloodied saliva, snarling at her with a split upper lip. Both their heads were ringing and they both fought furiously, trying to subdue the other. Viktor banged Max’s head against the floor a few times and noticed gleefully how the X5’s struggles weakened.

Suddenly the door flew open and a strong, blinding light from the ceiling lamp bathed the two combatants. Momentarily forgetting about their bout, they both froze in mid-track and turned to see what was going on.

Much to their surprise, they could see Lucian standing in the doorway, also frozen with an expression of utter shock and dismay on his face. His already large eyes were bulging and looking ready to pop out of their sockets.

Lucian felt as though his brain had turned into mush, and he had to blink several times to convince himself that he was not imagining the sight before him. The room -- his room -- was in total disarray; in fact it was an utter disaster. Broken and scattered things lay all over the floor, there were dents in the walls, and the two people piled on the floor were in a compromising position, to say the least. The feeling of shock increased when he recognized them.

“Viktor? Max?? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM?!” the Lycan cried out with an unusually high-pitched voice that broke at the end of the sentence, making Lucian sound like a dying, crowing rooster.

Despite the initial shock, Max came to her senses quickly, and when she saw an opening, she didn’t hesitate a second. Never having played by the book, she figured there was no point starting now and drove her knee into the Vampire’s exposed genitals with her full strength.

The effect was devastating and immediate. The final colour drained from Viktor’s face, and he literally doubled over, making it easy for Max to push him away and leap to her feet.

“Maybe you should ask him!” she snapped in reply to Lucian’s earlier question and gestured casually at the defeated Vampire, still lying on the floor, groaning, with his hands pressed to his crotch. “He started it!”

“But… but…” Lucian was still too shocked to compose words. He wanted an explanation, and he wanted it NOW!

Instead he got himself another unexpected surprise. The door opened behind him, and none other than Kraven rushed inside. The vain, aristocratic Vampire’s face displayed a reaction very similar to Lucian’s when he was greeted by the sight.

“What the…-- My Lord??”

Max simply sighed and went to collect her clothing, not even trying to cover herself up. “I guess I’ll take my “sadomasochistic leather rags” and get the fuck out of here,” she said sarcastically and hastily pulled on her pants and jacket, not bothering with the rest. “The night’s pretty much ruined anyway!”

Viktor opened his watery eyes and vaguely discerned his Regent’s shape next to Lucian’s. “Kraven…” he croaked, pain still pulsating in waves from his abused balls. “What are *you* doing here…?”

“I… followed you, my Lord…” the younger Vampire stuttered, trying to regain his composure. “I… was curious to know where you were headed, and I heard commotion, so I…” He all but jumped in the air when the X5 pushed past him in order to leave. If the female had done *that* to Viktor, she was not someone he wanted to mess with!

Max noticed gleefully how the pampered snob cowered from her, and he was wise to do so. Her mood was currently even blacker than her Ninja 650!

When Viktor showed no signs of getting up on his own, Kraven ran to his side and carefully pulled him into a sitting position. Lucian’s bathrobe conveniently lay on the floor beside them, and the Regent wrapped it around his nude Sire’s shoulders, figuring that the Elder was in no shape to dress in his own intricate garments.

“It’s alright…” he cooed in the older man’s ear while rubbing Viktor’s back and shoulders affectionately. It seemed as if he’d finally get the chance he’d been wanting for centuries! Kraven was almost tempted to run after the X5 to thank her. Would Fate finally be kind to him?

“Come here… I’ll drive you home…” he whispered, lips pressed closely against the Elder’s neck, as he dragged Viktor to his feet and half-led, half-carried the older man toward the door. Too pained and tired to object, Viktor let Kraven do as he pleased. Talking alone was exhausting in his current state!

Lucian watched the two Vampires limp out of his destroyed hotel room, gazing after them with a dumbstruck expression. Once again he passed his eyes over the bombsite that used to be his sleeping place. Why had they left *him* to take care of the mess?!

*~*~*

“Do you need more ice?”

“No…” Viktor murmured into the pillow, hoping that Kraven grasped it. They had arrived safely back at Ordoghaz, and the younger Vampire had tucked him down into his bed and fussed over him in the most peculiar manner.

The Elder was pressing a package of ice against his mauled genitals, which were still throbbing vehemently in rhythm with his heartbeats. The bitch sure had thick kneecaps!

Kraven lay beside him in the bed, hugging him, petting him, and cooing words of comfort into his ear. Viktor wasn’t sure what to make of it. The Regent had never behaved like this before, so there had to be a reason for it. Kraven hardly ever did anything out of the goodness of his heart.

He felt Kraven press up even closer against him, and suddenly the raven-haired Vampire’s chin was resting on his shoulder. “You know, my Lord… in case the ice isn’t helping, there might be, erm… something else we could try to rid you of the pain.”

“What…?” the Elder groaned miserably.

“Don’t worry, I’ll show you…” Kraven purred and started pulling the bedcovers down.

Finis