"Uootem"
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You are entering into the depths of my poetic soul... herein lies twenty-five plus years of the pouring-out and the taking-in of emotions that have accidentally (in an intentional way) spilled onto printed page.... the ink used to write the ramblings herein is my blood, my tears, my hopes, my desires, and my understanding of reality -- the loss of my first love. Chaos and futility happen to reign here but in plurality with hope and dreams. I know this plurality exists for I am a Libra... I have balanced them on my scales of reason and insanity all my life. As you read me (if you dare) keep in mind that I'm not normal at all... my inner longings are uniquely mine... if you happen to get the feeling that you too have experienced what I have experienced, think again (unless you have been so deeply in love with someone that it scared you into doing things that pushed them away from you forever). I happen to like being a poetic fool -- a little crazy around the edges and deep within. I like thinking that love (especially the first experience with it) is something very special, that once it is shared between two people -- nothing can ever be the same, but you might take offense to that. You see -- I am insane -- for I once loved and lost it -- she and I were way too young to have the feelings that we had, we were way too young for our love to survive growing up... but somehow it did, inside me at least... in a place that no one has ever touched again. Inside these pages... with words written long ago in another time... I will tell you how I see things... how I have felt, and no one can censor me, because these are my words. I rule-- I am Supreme Keeper of Memories... and my name is Uootem, Poet. Nah, really though, this is not a collection of sagacious thought, and by no means is it some preppy boy's diary about a similarly preppy girl he loved in adolescence. This is a collection of words and phrases and emotions that I could do nothing about but write down -- a sort of release of myself that I have for years kept neatly concealed behind a mask that I have had to wear most of this lifetime. Every word applies to my life, though they may not necessarily be my life -- for they existed only in my dream world... the only place she never left. My inspiration has come from her -- my first love, my muse. You have been warned. If you dare enter in... ENJOY!!! If you find similar emotions within yourself, I PITY YOU... for you know how love can taste and how losing that love can sting. What is my poetry? It isn't about rhythm, style, long obscure words. (although that does creep in occasionally). It isn't about verses, stanzas, linguistic rules, or words that always rhyme. My poetry is my heart, my soul, and my mind all working together to attempt to explain the complexities of emotions that have filled my life with awe. It is about taking all the confusion I have felt and attempted to put it into words that an older me, someday, can understand and relate to... can remember. These poems are all me. I am the creator of my poetry just as my poetry is a creator of me. "We make our memories, then our memories make us". I have opened this site to FINALLY share my poetry with the world... first here and then perhaps, if the fates allow, in a published book. I have been sorting through a shoe box of things written at vastly different times... in vastly different moods... trying to figure out which items are worth anything in a literary sense (you know, worth the page it was written on... and worth publishing. But I soon found out that I am not one to judge my own poetry-- for there is too much emotion in everyone of them for me to see things clearly. Just as in life, I have not seem anything clearly since that love was lost. On a more pleasant note and what has actually brought me to this place where I feel the need to share my poetry... She and I have found each other again! But in a totally different way... I have found her as a dear friend... (like all first loves should eventually become). She has her life, and her love... I have mine also. We both know that we can not go back and recreate things of the past... but we can remember... and we can take our shared moments and build something more mystical... and satisfying... by entering the future through another gate and enjoying each other's thoughts on a new path. And by doing this, we have found something that we missed the first time... an inner "knowing" and a "long lasting connection to eternity". Isn't life wonderful? Uootem |
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uootem@hotmail.com Comments are welcomed!!!!
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(Plagiarism is against the Law). |
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