As those who have led us are confessing that they created a hierarchical system of discipling that was unbiblical and repressive, it can cause us to wonder what in the world we have been a part of for the last ten or fifteen or twenty years.  As we hear leaders who were once held up to us admit that they managed a system that led to compulsory giving, we can feel manipulated and duped.  Then as we hear that the money that was given was not always spent wisely and that spiritual leaders in some cases adopted the financial values of our culture, we just get plain mad. As we hear major figures admit that their leadership led to the creation of two churches--one for leaders with certain privileges and a certain arrogance--and then another for everybody else, we can feel as if we have been abused and devalued. We can hardly appreciate the honesty of the people when their very confessions make us realize more than before that we were so disrespected. When we hear apologies for the use of statistics and results to motivate us, we can wonder if this really had anything to do with God or if it just about men's egos.

It is of little wonder that some of us are finding it hard to just forgive and move on. It is not surprising that some are wondering if they can stay with our churches, given the embarrassment, hurt and anger they now feel. Like a woman who has a repentant husband with a long history of abuse, we now don't know if we dare trust again. We consider giving up on organized religion altogether or going somewhere else without a history of hurt or perhaps just beginning our own efforts to be the church, since we are not sure we want to be overseen by any leaders.

It seems to me that all of these feelings, struggles and thoughts are easy to understand. Trauma affects some more than others (as we are seeing on the battlefields of Iraq), but it affects us all. What we have gotten in touch with as a church in recent months has been traumatic, and a few apology letters (even though heart-felt) and a few Scriptures and a few prayers (though much needed) will not make resolution quick or simple. I say this because if you are honestly wrestling with where your spiritual life is going to be lived out or even if it is something you aren't sure you want to pursue, I want you to know I understand what would lead you to such a point. However, since you have invested a great deal in this movement toward Jesus that we are a part of, I just want to give you something else to consider before you make a move. As we face some of the painful things we may have repressed for some time or some of the new revelations that make us angry, I think there are several questions that we must wrestle with. First, was God involved in this at all?  Second, was any good really done? Third, is there anything here that is redeemable? Fourth, is there any reason that staying with this movement would be the best choice?

Was God Involved in This?

With all these questions, we are struggling with the age-old issue of how God uses flawed human beings to accomplish his divine purposes. It is right to stir people with the message that we can all be a part of something that is from God and something that makes an eternal difference in people's lives. But then we can feel such disappointment when we see failures in people who proclaimed these lofty ideas to us. Man's sin has a way of obliterating God's glory, and so we ask whether God was involved in this at all?

 This is where Biblical perspective is badly needed. Two thousand years ago Jesus came, born of a woman, born under the Jewish law. He was God incarnate. He was the fulfillment of a plan that had been unfolding for hundreds of years. God was in Christ. In Jesus, God was working. But our Bibles don't begin with Matthew or Mark or Luke or John. There are thirty-nine books in our canon of Scripture that were written before the birth of Jesus. The clear message of Scripture was that God was working in all those years that led up to Jesus, but what was that history about?  Do we find there story after story of righteous men and women who went from victory to victory? Do we find those who overcame all the temptations of the lower nature and always used money, power and influence in godly ways? Do we find a steady succession of leaders who led the nation of Israel to more and more righteous ends so that they finally produced a pristine temple and glorious people who were able to give the Son of God a hero's welcome?

That's not what we find in the Bible. From the stories in Genesis to the story of Jesus, God was at work. Early on, he had a chosen people. He had a nation that was uniquely his. From generation to generation he was patiently working out a plan, so that in "the fullness of time" (Galatians 4:4 KJV), he might send forth his Son. However, when you read through the Old Testament, you are struck not by the glory of Israel or the consistent faithfulness of her leaders, but by the flaws, the sin, the arrogance, the selfishness of both the people and the leaders. Are there heroes in the Old Testament? Absolutely, and Hebrews 11 describes many of them. But even these heroes like Noah, Abraham, Moses and Gideon were flawed and could easily have written their own letters of apology.

In 1 Samuel 4:21, the daughter-in-law of Eli the priest gives birth to a son and the Scripture says, "She called the boy Ichabod, saying, 'The glory has departed from Israel....'" (Ichabod meant "no glory.")  A second century BC reader of the Jewish Scriptures could have wondered if perhaps the whole nation shouldn't have been named Icabod. From Adam and Eve's sin in Genesis to the shameful practice described in Malachi of offering God their leftovers and discards (Malachi 1:8), these were often a people of "no glory." But was God still at work? He was. Had God given up on them? He had not. In 1 Corinthians 10 Paul reasons that in some terrible times described in the Old Testament that God was working to not only teach the people of that day, but to lay the groundwork for something more important.  And then he makes this astounding statement:

These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come. (1 Corinthians 1:10-11)

If we only looked at Israel's failures and at God's discipline of them, we might just say, "Icabod--no glory." But Paul says God was at work so that something might be clear to us "on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come."   It seems to me that there is a powerful truth here.  As God works with his flawed and sinful people, what is happening at the moment may not be pretty, but the God who can work in all things for good has his eye not just on the present moment, but on other things that he wants to fulfill. How can we be sure then that some of the experiences we have had for the last twenty (or in some cases thirty) years are not leading to something more important?

According to Scripture, what sacrifices does God most value? Is it not "a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart"? (Psalm 51:17) Right now in our churches, we are seeing dozens, if not hundreds, of leaders at many levels with broken and contrite hearts. Like David in that same Psalm, they are saying, "For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me" (Psalm 51:3). Is it not possible that God has brought us all this way to show the world what brokenness and repentance look like on a massive scale? Maybe we thought God wanted to show the world our impressive statistics and our growth charts, when all along he wanted to show others what humility and dependence on him really looked like.

After writing the last paragraph I went with a friend to pray at a favorite spot by the river near my home. He has been a disciple for more than twenty years, has never been a staff member, but deeply loves the church. He prayed that in this current climate, we would really demonstrate forgiveness and learn the freedom of forgiveness. As he prayed, this thought came to me: Since God loves to show forgiveness, since that is what he was doing dramatically in Christ, could it be that God has brought us all this way, not only to show the world what brokenness and repentance looks like on a grand scale, but to show the world (and the church) what massive forgiveness looks like? If so, how tragic it would be if we missed our opportunity.

Was Any Good Really Done?

 The second question is this: As we look at what has happened in the last two or three decades of our movement, was any good done? For some people this is a no-brainer, but for others who are very focused on the pain and the problems, this can be a serious question. In the midst of some somber revelations, admissions and apologies, we can almost feel that there was nothing but error; and this is not a good feeling. It is particularly troublesome if one feels that way and then considers how much time or effort or money he or she has given to what now seems to be a failed cause. Others have addressed this question in various articles and letters that I have seen circulated on the Internet or posted on Web sites. I will just add a few of my own comments.

 Once again a Biblical perspective is helpful. On his "second missionary journey" Paul planted the church in Corinth, staying with them for a year and a half (Acts 18:11). Knowing Paul, we can be confident that during those eighteen months he was active doing the same things he had done up the road in Thessalonica. To that church he wrote:  "We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us" (1 Thessalonians 2:8).  And a few verses later: "For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory" (1 Thessalonians 2:11-12). This was just the way Paul was, and we can be sure he was this way with every church. Later he would write to the Corinthians and remind them of the attitude he had while among them:

Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings. (1 Corinthians 9:19-23)

I think we would have to agree that the Corinthians had sacrificial and servant leadership. They had great training from one of the best. And yet, some months after Paul left, he learned that the church had developed a litany of problems. There was division, there were lawsuits among brothers, there was the toleration of immorality, there were disputes over who has the greater gifts, a mockery was being made of the Lord's Supper, and there were some who even denied the resurrection of Jesus. Quite a mess. Was any good done in Corinth? Listen to these words:

Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. (1 Corinthians 6:9-11, emphasis added)

The church had some serious problems to deal with, and yet there were still people in that church who had been brought out of immorality, idolatry, prostitution, crime, drunkenness and the like. They had been washed, sanctified and justified. The fact that some in the church were behaving reprehensibly didn't undo the changes God had worked in these people's lives. Was Corinth a mess at the time of this writing? It was. Had eternal good still been done in that church? It had. Was the church at Corinth still enriched with spiritual gifts? Paul says that very thing (1 Corinthians 1:5-7). Were many in that church still in fellowship with Jesus Christ? Paul reminds them that they were (1 Corinthians 1:9).

The night before I wrote this, my wife and I met with a woman who has only been a disciple for a little over a year. As we counseled her about some issues in her life, I shared with her the story of our family's decision to move to Boston in 1987. I shared how it was a decision that required my faith and my level of surrender to go to a deeper point. I went on to share how God had blessed that decision. As I shared with her, I felt a great deal of emotion and gratitude welling up in me. I thought of the way God had cared for me during these years, how he had taught me much about dealing with a chronic debilitating illness, how he had helped me through a major depression, how he allowed us to help others find him. I thought of a family who had been in our home just a few weeks earlier and how God had completely transformed them so that now they are not only a healthy family, but have recently taken in two foster children to give them a loving home. I thought of another couple who were with us that night whose marriage has been healed through the deep involvement of disciples after a devastating wound.

I thought of the changes in our three now-adult daughters and how each of them have helped a number of others find a new life in Christ. I thought of the great man our oldest daughter married--a man who became a disciple through the outreach of one of our other churches in another state before coming to New England. And then I thought of how many times my story could be multiplied. Has any good been done?  I believe the answer to that is clear.

Is it good that there are people in more than 150 countries who today are saying "Jesus is Lord"? Is it good that people who once worshiped the gods of money, success, sex, pleasure, popularity and power have now been washed and sanctified and justified in the name of the Lord Jesus? Is it good that most of our churches have a racial blend that would amaze the world? Is it good that there are hundreds of projects to serve the poor and the elderly that did not exist 15 years ago? Without a doubt, there are things in our churches that need to change and must change. Without a doubt, we strayed from the Biblical path in some serious ways. But has good been done? Without question a vast amount of good has been done. Through these jars of clay God's transcendent power has worked.

Is There Anything That Is Redeemable?

The third question is this: As we look at the challenges we find ourselves in today, as we look at a structure that seems to have come unglued in just a few months, is there anything here that is redeemable? Once again, I know that some people will quickly say, "Sure," but others are at such at place that they aren't confident at all or they have profound doubts. When it has been universally agreed that our movement is wracked with systemic sins, one has to wonder what can be salvaged.

If the good I described above is really there--and I am convinced it is--then there is so much to build on. Our churches are still full of people who have great hearts and want to find out what pleases God. As an elder, during the last two weeks, I have been involved in four family forums with four sectors in the church in Boston where we openly discussed any issue that anyone wanted to bring up.  On Sunday morning I told the congregation that one of the things that impressed me in these forums was just how much people really care about the church. I have no doubt that what I saw here in my little corner of the world can be seen in hundreds of other places.

One of the decisions that most of us in a leadership role have made is that we are going to make sure that the Bible is studied in depth. We have repented of our humanistic ways of trying to build the church in some other fashion. The announcements about this decision have been received with great enthusiasm. People are eager to study what the Bible teaches about leadership and what the Bible teaches about spiritual gifts that are given to everyone in the body. They are just hungry for God's word. Is there anything redeemable when you have great numbers of people eager to study the Scriptures? Is there anything you can build on when people stop trying "to figure it out" and start listening to God who already has it figured out?

The transformation in our thinking has caused dozens of leaders to see that every member of the body is important and that we must find ways to lead inclusively. Can much more be done once we return to the spirit of Acts 15:22? ("Then the apostles and elders, with the whole church, decided to choose some of their own men and send them to Antioch with Paul and Barnabas," emphasis added.) Will we be a healthier church when every member knows that what he or she has to offer is valued and that efforts will be made to ensure that everyone's voice will be heard?

Earlier I noted the number of leaders who are showing a broken and contrite heart. Does God think a movement of people is redeemable when this becomes the dominant posture of its leaders?  It seems to me that those are the very people God says are redeemable. If what we have been through has stripped us of our arrogance and our self-righteousness and has brought us to a deep conviction that "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble," then we are not only redeemable, but we are in the best position we have ever been in. If we have been truly humbled--as I believe we have been--then that only means the cross of Christ can take a place in our lives that is greater than it has ever had. When this becomes true, we are truly connected to the wisdom and the power of God (1 Corinthians 1:24). That sounds like we have a future!  

Is Staying Really the Best Choice?

The final question is this: is staying really the best choice? At the present time some are wrestling with this decision. Please hear me: I do not in any way stand in judgment of you as you try to deal with this. You may feel betrayed, disappointed and hurt. You may have heard, "Hurt me once; shame on you. Hurt me twice; shame on me," and then feel you have a responsibility to not remain in an unhealthy situation. This is a struggle that should be honored. I would just ask you consider a few final thoughts.

Is it not possible that given what we have been through, we are closer than ever to being where God wants us to be? Where else can you go and find leaders who have been as humbled as our leaders have been? Where else can you go and find people who have looked as carefully as we have at what Biblical leadership really means? Where else can you go and find the deep conviction we now have that finances need to be handled by those who have nothing to gain from them? Where can you go and find people who now feel stronger than we do about providing motivation based purely on love for God, love for people and gratitude for the cross? There may very well be places where people are ahead of us in all these areas. If it is true, I praise God and pray we can meet them and learn from them.

However, in the meantime I have to believe that we as a movement are closer to God's vision for us than we have ever been. How did we get here? Not by our performance; that's for sure! We got here only by his grace. Have we arrived? Not by a long shot. Have we understood that we will not in this world ever arrive? I believe we have.

I thank God that he connected me with the beginning roots of this movement thirty-five years ago and for the way he helped me reconnect with it some years later. I thank God for the way he has blessed us. I thank God for the way he loved us enough to discipline us. I thank God for the way he has humbled us and forgiven us. And I thank God he has not stopped believing that we are at least among his chosen people, his royal priesthood, his holy nation, his people who can declare the praises of him who called us out of darkness into his wonderful light (1 Peter 2:9).

I thank God we are closer than ever to being a church where "Amazing Grace" is not just a song but the theme of our lives. I pray we will all stay and grow together in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Back to Main Menu