EP:"What a load of crap.  If you want this belt back, you can come take it from me."

(El Presidente takes off his jacket and loosens his tie as the crowd roars it's approval.)

LSB:"Fine, keep the belt for all I care.  It doesn't mean you are the champion.  You are just another chump that the BoD will have to deal with."

(LSB slips the mic back into his jacket pocket as he and Sniper walk to the back.)

EP:"Now Jackie, what were you saying before we were so rudely interupted?"

JS:"El Presidente, it looks like the PP&H lacks the numbers that some of these other alliances have. What do you think Ryan Wisler will say tonight, and will anyone else join the PP&H in the future?"

 

EP:"Well, Jackie your question couldn't be more appropriate. All I can say, that Ryan Wisler has shown some great potential since his debut. He has pisazz and charisma, and the women he surrounds himself are breathtaking like my First Lady. So he would fit well with us, however, if he's not with us then he's against us, and you know how the law treats people who are against us. As for new members, believe me when I tell you that this roster is filled with more jasas then potential PP&H members, but you never know who may appear or reappear down the line."

(El Presidente winks into the camera.)

EP:"We'll just have to see what he has to say a little later on.  And I just want to say, nobody pay any attention to what those two jasas said just now.  There is no way I'm letting Baxter screw me out of this belt I earned.  They will get theirs.  It's coming."

(The theme from Scarface plays again as El Prez slides out of the ring and heads to the back.)

MJ:"Wow, a lot of stuff going on during that interview!  Can you believe Baxter saying Sniper it still the champ?"

EB:"Of course I can believe it MJ.  Sniper didn't sign the contract.  Baxter is right!"

MJ:"Oh please.  You can't tell me you are buying into that crap."

EB:"The truth hurts MJ."

MJ:"And people wonder why my hair is starting to turn grey.  Let's get this night rolling.  Cindy."

CM:"The following contest is set for one fall.  Introducing first, already in the ring, weighing in at 245 pounds, Mr. Wrestling!"

(Mr. Wrestling pumps his fist to the crowd.)

CM:"And his opponent, weighing in at 240lbs, Alan Storm!"

("We Ready" plays as Alan Storm makes his way down to the ring.  He has his taser with him and he is clicking it on and off as he walks down the ramp.)

MJ:"Storm lays the taser on the ring apron and slides into the ring."

EB:"Oh boy, look at this!"

("Sweet" Gordy Dix sprints down to the ringside area.  He is carry a large doll that resembles Captain Caveman.  He grabs the taser at ringside and comes into the ring and tasers both Alan Storm and Mr. Wrestling.  The ref bails out to avoid a shock of his own as Gordy grabs a microphone.)

SGD:"Nobody wanted to see this boring ass match anyway.  What I would like to do for everyone is give you a little taste of what will happen next week when I take on Captain Caveman."

(Gordy drags the Captain Caveman doll to the center of the ring and starts going through moves on it.  He puts it in the Sac Smeller, the Tube Steak Shake, and rolls it up in the Large Package.   After giving the doll quite a beating he finishes it up with the Bump N Grind.)

SGD:"If you guys would like to see more of me in action, then be sure to pick up my latest DVD."

(Gordy holds up a DVD and the camera zooms in to reveal the title.  "One in the Pink & One in the Stink: Volume 2" Starring Aphrodite.)

SGD:"You can order your very own copy at SGD.com.  Other than that, I don't have much to say.   Captain Cavebitch, hold on to your belt as tight as you can, sleep with it, take a picture of it, because as soon as we face off it will be mine and you will miss it."

(Dix drops the mic, slides out of the ring, and heads to the back.)

MJ:"Well, that certainly didn't turn out like I thought it would."

CM:"The match has been declared a no contest."

EB:"Mr. Wrestling and Alan Storm are in no condition to wrestle a match right now, so the ref has declared this one a no contest."

MJ:"Well, maybe out next debut match will go a little smoother.  Let's take it down to Cindy to get this one underway."

CM:"The following contest is set for one fall!  Introducing first, already in the ring, weighing in at 280 pounds, Hardbody Harrison!"

(Harrison flexes and poses in the ring like a bodybuilder.)

CM:"And his opponent, weighing in at 250lbs., Mr. Insane!"

("Cocky" by Kid Rock starts to play as Mr. Insane walks down the ramp.  He is joined by the other members of the New Era of Wrestling.)

MJ:"The whole crew is out tonight.  This should be interesting."

EB:"There is strength in numbers MJ.  Don't let anyone try to tell you different."

MJ:"The bell rings and we are underway.  Woah!  Mr. Insane charges right at Hardbody Harrison and nails him with a superkick!  Harrison is laid out cold!"

EB:"Harrison never has been the best at taking a hit.  But that was quite a kick Mr. Insane just laid on him."

MJ:"And now Mr. Insane is climbing to the top rope.  He's look to end this one very quickly.  And there it is!  Mr. Insane nails the Suicide Splash!  Here's a cover!
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3!!  Mr. Insane wins his debut match with ease."

CM:"Your winner, via pinfall, Mr. Insane!"

(The rest of NEW climb into the ring.  The Crippler grabs a mic as The Enforcer picks Harrison up and throws him out of the ring.)

Crippler:"Just like Mr. Insane just made quick work of Hardbody Harrison, Death & Destruction will make short work of the Immortals next week and become the #1 contenders.  We are the new force in professional wrestling and no one standing in our way will be spared.  No matter who it is.  We don't like being told what to do and we make our own laws.  No one in this league has done anything yet to get our respect.  Including the tag team champions.  As soon as we finish off the Immortals, you two are next on the agenda.  The belts will be ours, along with anything else in this league we want."

("Cocky" plays again as the NEW exit.)

MJ:"Strong words from The Crippler."

EB:"The NEW certainly don't lack in confidence.  We'll have to see if they can back up all that talk."

MJ:"Speaking of talk, there has been a lot of talk between these next two.  NEW member Mr. Chopper takes on The Lineman in a steel cage match."

(MJ motions up to the cage that has been suspended over the ring.)

EB:"This should be quite a match.  These two have been wanted a piece of each other for quite a while now."

MJ:"Let's take it down to Cindy and get this one started."

CM:"The following contest is a steel cage match set for one fall!  Introducing first, weighing in at 280 lbs., Mr. Chopper!"

("Cocky" by Kid Rock plays again as Mr. Chopper comes down to the ring.  He is wearing leather pants and has many tattoos on his upper body.)

CM:"And his opponent, weighing in at 395lbs., The Lineman!"

("Wanna Be A Baller" kicks in as The Lineman appears at the top of the ramp.  He face is showing his trademark intensity as he makes his way to the ring.  As he gets in, the cage starts to lower.  It surrounds the ring closely on all four sides when it reaches the bottom.)

MJ:"Alright fans, here we go.  These two big men are ready to go at it.  They lock up in the middle of the ring.  The Lineman grabs a side headlock and then sends Mr. Chopper into the ropes with an irish whip.  The Lineman goes for a big clothesline that is ducked by Mr. Chopper.  Mr. Chopper fires a right hand but it's blocked by The Lineman!  The Lineman fire a big right hand of his own that stuns Chopper."

EB:"These two men have shot out to a blistering pace for this match.  I wonder how long they can keep up this level of activity."

MJ:"The Lineman scoops Mr. Chopper up and plants him in the middle of the ring with a powerslam!"

EB:"That's 400lbs. crashing down on top of you!"

MJ:"The Lineman goes for a cover!
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No!  Mr. Chopper gets a shoulder up."

EB:"Mr. Chopper better do something to get the momentum in this match turned around."

MJ:"Oh!  And that could be it!  Mr. Chopper nails The Lineman with a low blow!  The Lineman is doubles over and Mr. Chopper grabs him and lifts him up and over with a suplex!  Wow, what strength to get the big man over."

EB:"Mr. Chopper is a big, powerful guy.  Let's see if he can capitalize here.  He brings The Lineman to his feet.  He slams his head into the steel cage!"

MJ:"Wow!  Now he whips him into the corner.  And now Mr. Chopper is calling for the Pedal To The Medal!  He charges in but The Lineman moves at the last minute and Mr. Chopper goes crashing into the corner headfirst!"

EB:"And now The Lineman seems to have a surge of energy!  He gets a running start and puts a big splash on Mr. Chopper!  That's the Blitz!  The Lineman bounces off the ropes as Mr. Chopper stumbles out of the corner."

MJ:"Big spear from The Lineman!  That's the QB Sack!  And now here's a cover!
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3!!  The Lineman wins it!"

CM:"Your winner, via pinfall, The Lineman!"

MJ:"The Lineman picks up a big victory here in the cage match against Mr. Chopper.  Both men looked pretty tough, but The Lineman was able to pull it off in the end."

(The cage raises and the Lineman starts to leave the ring.  As he does, the rest of the NEW start to run towards the ring.   The Enforcer nails The Lineman with a big clothesline.)

EB:"Oh my goodness!  NEW must not care much for losing matches.  Now all three of the members that just came down are stomping on The Lineman!"

(Sweardog comes running down the ramp with a chair as the crowd goes crazy.  He takes a big homerun cut with the chair but all the NEW members clear out of the way.  He helps The Lineman to his feet as the two groups mouth off at each other.  Eventually they both head to the back.)

MJ:"NEW doesn't respect anyone and Sweardog & The Lineman are men who demand respect.  I imagine they will have dealings with each other again."

EB:"Sweardog has a lot on his mind right now.  The tag champs Whitten & Colossus were aligned with him, then switched over and joined the BoD last week.  I'm sure he's still trying to figure out how to deal with that as well."

("Pimp Juice" by Nelly play's as the new Extreme Division Champion Ryan "Big Pimpin" Wisler make's his way to the ring.   The champ has the belt around his waist, the shirt that Sweet Gordy Dix gave him in his left hand, and he is wearing abercrombie jean's with multiple hole's up and down the pants.  He has no shirt revealing his very fit and musculeur body which make's all the ladies in the crowd scream in approval.  He has his usual white Nike mid top's he has a hat on backward's which read's "CHAMP".  Wisler walk's up the stairs take's a microphone and a chair then place's the belt on his shoulder and sit's in the chair.)

MJ:"Looks like Paul Sandler is here to do in interview with Wisler."

PS:"Well first off welcome to Mayhem champ."

RW:"Thank's Paul I have waited my entire life to be called champ and now I really am it's really a dream come true."

PS:"Well you earned it with that win at Summer Spectacular it was one hell of a match no doubt about it."

RW:"Ya it was a pretty good match and as I said all week long DTM cheap shotted me on Mayhem and got lucky and just like I said it didn't
happen again because I was ready for him to cower outside the ring and then jump back in once I had Crippler down and out."

PS:"What were you thinking when you jump all the off the ladder and onto that flaming table?"

RW:"Well Paul when you jump off of a twelve foot ladder all you are usually thinking is "I hope I don't get hurt here" but that night I was
thinking "Here's some payback you sick pyromaniac" and of course I not only won the belt and the match but I got some payback on the psycho DTM."

PS:"Well Big Pimpin it's decision time Sweet Gordy Dix gave you a decision to make at Summer Spectacular and that is are you going to join the
PP&H?"

RW:"Well Paul at Summer Spectacular it wasn't only the breakout night in my career but it was also a night in which most of the USCW joined
force's into several new group's and that made me think now I am a marked man this championship belt (He raise's the belt in the air as the crowd roar's their approval) is nothing but a target but I am glad to have it becase now I will get everyone's best and they will get mine but it
made me think now that I am a marked and everyone else has people watching their back's I need some guy's to look out for me too and who better
than the World Champion and a Legend so to your proposistion to join the PP&H..... Gordy Dix I say this everyone beware because the old PP&H is
coming back and this is just the start because they have just added the best free agent on the market the Extreme Division champ!"

(Wisler then take's the shirt and put's it on.)

RW:"Big Pimpin say's yes I am in and now the PP&H has 1/2 of the championship's in this league and now we run this league!"

(Suddenly DTM appears from nowhere and slides into the ring behind Wisler.  He has a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire.  He nails Wisler in the back with it.)

MJ:"Oh my God!  DTM is here and he's attacking the Extreme division champion!"

(DTM lays the bat across the throat of Wisler and starts to climb to the top rope.)

EB:"No!  He can't do that!  He might kill somebody!"

(El Presidente and "Sweet" Gordy come running from the back.  DTM sees them coming and decides against jumping at Wisler and instead hops down and to the ringside area as SGD and El Prez slide into the ring.)

MJ:"The PP&H is down to make the save for their newest member, "Big Pimpin" Wisler!"

(DTM points to the ring and threatens Wisler as they backs away and head into the back.  Gordy helps Wisler up and the three men raise their arms together in the ring as the crowd cheers their approval.)

EB:"Is the crowd cheering the PP&H?"

MJ:"The PP&H has always had a cult following of fans, but it appears now that most of the crowd is on their side."

(The PP&H slide out of the ring and head to the back.)

MJ:"Well fans, we have one match remaining.  The main event between Hades and Collosus.  And it should be amazing.  There is a level of animosity between these two wrestlers right now that rivals anything we've ever seen here in the USCW.  Colossus turned his back on Hades last week at Summer Spectacular and didn't join up with him as expected.  Instead, he joined with commissioner Baxter to form the Board of Directors."

EB:"Hades is already an angry guy.  But add this to it and he will not be in a good mood at all tonight."

MJ:"Let's take it down to Cindy to get this main event underway."

CM:"The following contest is set for one fall.  Introducing first, weighing in at 290 pounds, Hades!"

("Highway to Hell" by AC/DC plays as Hades, Apollo, and Captain Caveman walk down to the ring.  Apollo and Captain Caveman are carrying oversized, gold-plated caveman clubs.)

MJ:"What the....?"

EB:"I love it.  One again Captain Caveman gets his weaponry upgraded.  Now his clubs are gold-plated."

CM:"And his opponent, weighing in at 350 pounds, Colossus!"

(The BoD theme starts to play again as Colossus comes out with Marcus Whitten, Sniper, and "Lightning" Scott Baxter following behind them.  Whitten and Colossus both have their tag belts with them as they come down to the ring.)

MJ:"You can cut the tension with a knife at ringside.  On one side of the ring you have Apollo and Hades with those clubs, then on the other side you have the BoD.  This is a recipie for something interesting to happen."

EB:"I wonder how long this match will actually go with all these people here at ringside."

MJ:"The bell rings and the two big men just walk to the middle of the ring.  What a staredown between these two!  Neither man is flinching as they stand nose to nose.  Oh!  Hades connects on a big right hand!  And Colossus fires back!  They are trading punches in the middle of the ring!"

EB:"This match certainly won't last long at this rate!  Somebodies going to get hurt!"

(Persephone emerges from the back and starts to strut down to the ring.  She gets down to the ring, and heads over to the announcers booth where she sits in the lap of Earl Backwater.)

MJ:"Well, thanks for joining us Persephone.  I'm sure we can find you a more suitable place to sit."

Persephone:"I'm just fine MJ."

(Persephone runs her fingers through Backwater's hair.  Backwater is completely distracted from the match.)

MJ:"Alright, in the ring, Hades has grabbed the advantage.  He whips Colossus into the ropes and then nails him with a big forearm shot as he bounces back.  That has to hurt, as Hades wears those black metal wrist guards."

(MJ looks over at Backwater who says nothing.)

MJ:"Alright.   Now Colossus is stunned and Hades grabs him by the throat!  Hades lifts him up and slams him down with a big chokeslam!  Hades makes a cover! 
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No!  Colossus kicks out."

(MJ look over at Backwater again who still says nothing.)

MJ:"Damn it Earl, do I have to call this match by myself?"

EB:"Relax MJ.  I'm a little distracted over here."

MJ:"Hades bring Colossus to his feet.  But Colossus connects on an elbow to the gut of Hades!  And another.  He grabs Hades and throws him over the top rope to the outside!"

EB:"And it look like this fight will continue on the outside!  Colossus slides out of the ring to join Hades at ringside."

MJ:"Colossus brings Hades to his feet.  He takes Hades head and slams it into the guard rail around the ring!  What a shot!  He's going to do it again but no!  Hades blocks it and slams Colossus headfirst into the railing!"

EB:"Colossus is reeling now!  Hades grabs him and goes to whip him towards the ring steps but Colossus reverses it and whips Hades into the ring steps!"

MJ:"What an impact that had!  Hades head is busted open!  He is bleeding now!  Colossus grabs him by the hair and is bringing him over to our location!  He scoops Hades up and lays him right here on our annoucer's table!"

EB:"Now Colossus climbs back into the ring.  He can't be doing what I think he is about to do!"

MJ:"Colossus is climbing to the top turnbuckle!  That's a 350lbs. man!  Oh my God!  Earl, Persephone, look out!"

(The three of them scatter as Colossus leaps from the top rope and crashes down on top of Hades, completely destroying the announcer's table in the process.  Persephone runs over to check on Hades.  It appears that she hands something to Hades and helps him slide it into his pocket.)

MJ:"Our table has been destroyed here at ringside.  But our broadcast equipment seems to be ok.  Both men are still down here at ringside.  Finally, Colossus gets to his feet.  He picks Hades up and rolls him into the ring.  This could be it Earl!"

EB:"Did you see Persephone hand something to Hades?  I could have sworn I did."

MJ:"Colossus slowly climbs into the ring.  Persephone jumps  up on the ring apron and has gotten the attention of the ref, who is trying to get her to get down."

EB:"Look, Hades is taking something out of his pocket!  It's a pair of brass knuckles!  He just slipped them on.  Colossus comes over to pick him up.  He does and then Hades nails Colossus with the brass knuckles!  The ref didn't see anything because he was distracted by Persephone!"

MJ:"Now Persephone points out the laid out Colossus and Hades makes a cover!
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3!! Hades wins it!"

CM:"Your winner, via pinfall, Hades!"

MJ:"Now there is chaos at the ringside area.  The BoD saw what happened and they started to storm the ring but Apollo and Captain Caveman got their first with those clubs!  They are keeping the BoD at bay.  And Hades is not done with Colossus!  He picks him back up and nails him with the Cerberus Slam!  Now Persephone is in the ring and she hands Hades some spraypaint.  Hades is spraypainting something on Colossus!"

EB:"Judas, it says Judas."

MJ:"Now the BoD has grabbed some of the spare wood that broke off the announcer's table and they are hitting the ring! 

(Hades, Apollo, and Captain Caveman slide out and head towards they back as they celebrate their win.)

MJ:"Well, fans, that's all the time we have for tonight.  What a night of action we had tonight.  Be sure to join as next week as we have the #1 contenders match to determine who will challenge for the tag team titles and also, the US title is on the line as "Sweet" Gordy Dix takes on the champion, Captain Caveman.  For Earl Backwater, this is Mike Johnson.  Good night everybody!"

(The BoD are complaining to the ref in the ring.  Colossus is back up and stares at Hades with hatred.  Then an overhead camera sweeps the crowd, and then settles on the red USCW logo in the center of the ring as the camera fades to black.)