More Than Meets the Eye. Yes, They’re Robots in Disguise.         Does anyone remember the good ol’ Transformers? Anyone that was a kid back in the eighties should. I mean, how could anyone forget those mighty Autobots: Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, Ultra Magnus and Ironhide? What about the Decepticons: Megatron, Starscream, the constructicons and Astro Train? Then there was the nefarious Unicron and his minions: Galvatron, Scourge and the seekers. Those were great times, grand TV shows, majestic films and most of all illustrious action figures. But the youth of today is missing out. All they get is Transformers: Beast Wars, which is utter crap, and Transformers: Robots in Disguise, which doesn’t even compare to the grandeur of the original. So, allow me to thoroughly disparage the new Transformers. I’ll leave Beast Wars alone (there’s no reason to add insult to injury).       Did you miss the Decepticons in Beast Wars? Well, they’ve returned, sort of. Yes, I know the Predicons in Beast Wars were essentially the Decepticons, but they looked like crap (dinosaurs, give me a break). In this new installment they aren’t dinos or animals but they aren’t headed by the Megatron. Instead, they opted to create both Decepticons and Predicons and to have them be separate entities. You see, the Predicons are led by the great Megatron (unfortunately their bodies are based on animals, disgusting) and the mighty Decepticons are led by some obscure black bot that looks like a small Optimus Prime. This is total crap. The Decepticons are nothing without their fearless leader (so what if he died a couple of times, they brought him back to life didn’t they) and the Predicons were just a bad idea to begin with.          Transformers: Robots in Disguise also seems to suffer from a little GLWMIUAHWA (George Lucas was making it up as he went along) syndrome. While not written or created by Mr. Lucas the show does manage to neglect (assume everyone forgot) the original plot. They come up with Predicons being a type of robot. They were never in the original. And they suck. They changed Optimus from an eighteen- wheeler with a tremendous blaster, the epitome of cool, to… a fire truck with none other than… a water cannon? What’s that about? A water cannon isn’t a real weapon and fire trucks are for homosexuals. Next comes the worst offense of all. Ultra Magnus and Optimus Prime are enemies. “WTF!?” you say and WTF is right. These two were best friends in the original. Prime was the leader was the leader of the Autobots and Magnus was his second in command. In this crap-fest Magnus wants Prime dead because he’s got his panties in a bunch over Prime getting the Autobot Matrix instead of him. What a little girl. And if I remember correctly, Prime gives Magnus, his friend, the Matrix when he dies in the beginning of Transformers: The Movie. This blatant disregard for the previous plot line truly makes me deem this show as crap.             Transformers: Robots in Disguise is no homage to the original Transformers. It’s just a lousy attempt to make some cash off of a dying franchise. If your children, younger siblings, relatives or anyone you know watches this horrid show and likes it, do them a favor and show them the original  (hell, I’ll let you borrow my copy of the movie). No prodigal kiddy should been denied access to the keenest toon of the eighties… no, of all time. Transformers, Transformers: Beast Wars, Transformers: Robots in Disguise, character names, and plot lines are trademarks of their respective companies.