(The whole arena dims as the crowd grows deathly silent, waiting in an ill-fated anticipation for what is inevitably to come. The lights then slowly come on and then dim down again. Suddenly a wolf's howl echoes through the arena piercing desolation into the hearts of those around. The methodic guitars of "Second Death" by Living Sacrifice then chime in.)

(The voice continues on alone saying "Presently waiting, Second Death." trailing off in an ominous echo. When the echo stops the lights flash on with a bang. As the lights come on and eyes begin to come back into focus there is a man crouched in the ring cloaked all in gray. The smoke flees from him as he stands and removes his hood to reveal the man known only as Ixon.)

(Evan Drexxler circles the ring, waiting for Johnny Damage. Drexxler prepares the ring with with all sorts of "goodies", such as tables and... stuff.

("Hardcore Hooligan" by Business plays and the one and only Johnny Damage, accompanied by the lovely Alexis. Alexis grabs Hooligan's cane and smiles. Hooligan smiles as well. The two make sloppy kissin' before someone has to fall down due to repeated blows to the body.)

(Hooligan gets onto the apron and Evan Drexxler goes for an early finish by attepmting a diving Hurricane Heart Punch through the ropes. Hooligan swipes his cane from Alexis' hands quickly and pounds Drexxler across the chin. Drexxler stumbles back and stares a dead stare at the Hardcore Hooligan. Damage displays his mastery in the art of spinning by swinging the Singapore cane between his fingers. The crowd goes nuts as Evan Drexxler enters the ring with a chair in hand. Drexxler does the classic mistake of holding the chair to close to his face and Damage dropkicks it causing it to reflect back into his face.)

Jimmy: Cleva guy!

(Johnny Damage hurries to the outer ring near Alexis and she pulls out barbed wire from a Safeway bag. Inside the bag's contents, is a jar of jam and a super soaker. He starts wrapping himself up like a Christmas tree with the barbed wire. Evan Drexxler perfectly executes a suicide dive using the ropes as a springboard nailing an off-guard Johnny Damage. Alexis pulls out the super soaker from the Safeway bag and starts spraying Drexxler with gasoline! Ixon squeezes his eyes and Damage swings a clothesline nailing Drexxler down to his back. Damage points at Drexxler and misses a bodysplash with the barbed wire wrapped around his body. Drexxler looks around and finds the Safeway bag with the jar of jam. Damage puts the weight on his feet and Drexxler places the Safeway bag covering his hideous face. Drexxler winds up his right fist and connects into the jar of jam beneath the Safeway bag! What appears to be jam, covers the once clear Safeway bag!)

Jimmy: There's jam all over his face!

(Hooligan pulls off the Safeway bag from his head and red jam is in his eyes. He rubs it away, only to receive a big boot to his cranium. Hooligan falls onto his back and Ixon surprises the crowd with a standing frog splash... That's right. He jumped up and delivered a frog splash from canvas level. Hooligan looks sore on his head quadrant. Ixon decides it's time to make his ultimate move.)

(Ixon runs over to Alexis and smooches her against her will. Ixon, when done playing with her executes a powerbomb through one of the tables outside the ring! The crowd boos as Ixon snarls like a kid with candy.)

(Hooligan regroups and places a table in the corner. Ixon goes back in to try and finish the Hardcre Icon. Ixon bumrushes Hooligan, but the crafty little bugger performs a drop-toe-hold and smashes Ixon's face through the table.)

(Hooligan notices Alexis' war-torn body. He still wants to raise a drug riddled family with her one day.)

Jimmy: This match is out of control. shit.

(Hooligan climbs to the top rope and waits for the groggy Ixon to get up and turn around. When Ixon turns around, Hooligan flies through the air and crashes down on Ixon like a sac with a bony hammer in it.)

1...2...Ixon kicks out!

(Hooligan climbs to the top rope again and waits for Ixon. Ixon groggily turns around and when Hooligan comes flying at him. Ixon snares him from the air and smashes Hooligan over his knee! Hooligan bends like a boomerang and flops to the canvas. Ixon goes to the outside and brings in one last table into the ring. Ixon rubs his gas soaked body on the table. While Ixon is rubbing on the table, Hooligan slimes out to Alexis' purse and grabs a zippo lighter. He ignites it and lights a cigarette, and tosses the zippo at his opponent, but it misses. Ixon gets off the table and he runs towards Hooligan.)

(Hooligan smashes his head into Ixon's and Ixon stumbles back. Hooligan delivers a soccer kick and Ixon looks glazed. Hooligan places him on the table and goes to the top rope. He soars through the air and delivers his spinning 180 frog splash! Hooligan's cigarette touches the gas on the table and it catches quickly! Before Hooligan can pin Ixon, they are covered in flame! The two are rolling around in terror as flames engulf their bodies. Ixon winces as his eyebrows singe off.)

(Officials storm the ring and put out the burning competitors. Now the match can continue. Ixon writhes on the ground rubbing where his eyebrows use to be. Hooligan climbs the top rope and tells like Tarzan. Ixon turns around and sees Hooligan performing his patented Hangover into a pin!)

1...2...3 (Damage defeats Drexxler via Hangover!)

Jimmy: Incredible! Have you've ever seen anything as incredible as this?
Rudolph: The bible, my friend. The bible.
Jimmy: Evan Drexxler will fight the loser of Cliff Knight and Chris Copeland. An unlucky man, he is indeed!

("Ænema" by Tool rips through the arena and the fans inside the Palace explode in mad fits of celebration)

Jimmy: This place is deafening Rudolph, I can't hear my wonderful voice, this is awful.
Rudolph: What? I can't hear you, this is great!

(The standing ovation is sustained as Chris Copeland limps down the aisle savoring every moment of the greeting. Gingerly protecting his left knee which is heavily taped over his orange wrestling tights, Cope rolls into the ring and snags the microphone. Waiting minutes for the roar of the crowd to die down.)

Copeland: You know, for a week now I have done nothing but fantasize of getting revenge on Cliff Knight. Every heartbeat I could taste my hatred for him. I woke up this morning salivating over my opportunity to inflict as much pain as he has caused me. I just never thought it would come to this. I ummm. I just, ahhh. I always figured my knee would heal. Of course it would heal. It's only fair that I get my chance to face Cliff Knight. But ummm… damn, this isn't easy. So, bare with me guys. I had to ahhhh. I ummm, I need to come out here and….. resig…. Resign from the tournament.

(The sellout crowd exudes a unanimous roar of disapproval as Copeland somberly leans against the top rope staring at the fans)

Copeland: I had every attention of wrestling here tonight. I put my gear on and taped up my knee, hoping the adrenaline would kick in and I could wrestle. But sometimes, things don't work out. I can't do it. As much as my head wants me to kick the jellybeans out of Knight, my body just won't let me. Life isn't fair, guys. I'm sorry.

(Chris Copeland tosses down the mic and exits the ring.)

[Backstage: Pondababa knocks the door of Cliff Knight]

(After a long road trip to Detroit, Cliff Knight is watching the monitor in the top right corner of his dressing room. He is obviously angry by Copeland’s decision. President Pondababa knocks the door of Knight.)

Pondababa: Do you see this?!? Listen to this??? Copeland has made it this far and calling it quits!!! Are you going to let this happen Knight???

(Cliff Knight stares up at the robotic figure)

Cliff Knight: No… F#ck No.

(Cliff Knight charges out of his locker room to the ring)

[Back to the arena]

(Chris Copeland is walking down the aisle way getting pats on the back from his home state crowd in Michigan.)

Jimmy: This is a shocker. Chris Copeland has resigned, giving Cliff Knight a free ride into the finals in Las Vegas. Rudolph: This guy was much like a Saint in the good book of Jesus Christ, but this is a shame.

(Cliff Knight charges to the ring like he just ate a rotten apple and strikes Copeland with a running forearm! Ponda walks to the ring)

Jimmy: OH MY!!! Knight’s not letting Copeland leave the ring!

(Copeland hops on his only good leg- his right one. As Copeland calls a timeout.)

Pondababa: Kill the man in his home state!!! Take out his other knee, Knight!!!

(Copeland hops on his right leg as Cliff Knight decapitates Copeland with a clothesline from the messenger of Hell. Ponda smiles as Cliff Knight drags the body of Chris Copeland and sends him steamrolling in the ring)

Jimmy: This is nuts! We’ve seen Pondababa brainwash Cliff Knight before, but this has just gone too far!
Rudolph: The lord would not approve of this. Knight is hurting the hurt!

(Ding. Ding. Ding. The bell sounds as Cliff Knight starts thrusting the right leg of Chris Copeland. It’s obvious Chris Copeland is showing signs of pain for not only his left leg, but also his right)

Rudolph: May Pondababa and Cliff Knight enter the fires of hell for all their actions they have caused in the Ultimate Survivor!
Jimmy: This may be a short one, Rudy.

(The painkillers hardly make their use as Cliff Knight punctures again the unhurt right leg of Chris Copeland. After six hard shots to the knee, Copeland folds like a cheap tent. He crawls to the turnbuckle and Knight like a man possessed stomps a mudhole into Chris Copeland.)

Jimmy: The crowd is so loud I can hardly hear myself think!

(The crowd hiss at Cliff Knight who is dragging Copeland by his short strands of brown hair. Cliff Knight places Copeland’s right leg on the turnbuckle and with an up and down motion he inflicts more pain to the right leg. Using shocking speed, Copeland kicks upward with his good leg and catches Knight in his eye. Knight releases his grip and Copeland gets up. Bypassing the pain, Copeland dives, spearing Cliff Knight to the ground. Still using his momentum, Copeland wraps a grisled arm around Cliff's chin and squeezes a deadly headlock on "THE Premier Athlete".)

Jimmy: Call Knight a surgeon, he’s picking Chris Copeland’s right leg apart.

(Cliff Knight attempts to Irish Whip Copeland into the opposite end of the ring but Copeland buckles and falls down in the center of the ring. Copeland nurses his right leg by rubbing it with his arm. But Knight is on Copeland, like a monkey on a banana. Knight grabs the two legs of Copeland and elbows the inner right thigh of Chris Copeland. Copeland screams like a banshee as Knight strikes yet again the right leg)

Rudolph: May God have mercy on Copeland’s soul.

(Chris Copeland sits on the canvas and rests his back up against the bottom turnbuckle. Pondababa pats the mat a few times for his bounty hunter, Cliff Knight. Copeland squints his eyes because of the pain of both the right and left leg. Cliff Knight stands tall and proud as he gives the thumbs up the injured struggling mind manipulator himself, Chris Copeland. Just like Julius Caesar, he drops his thumb. The fans erupt in boos as Knight drags the legs of Copeland away from the ropes. Copeland shakes his hands and Knight lifts him up by the hair. Knight spins his right arm at Copeland but Copeland blocks! Copeland unleashes a right hand into the face of Knight! Knight looks surprised! Copeland swings his left hand and connects into the jaw of Knight! Copeland hoists Knight with a bodyslam! The fans detonate for their home state hero as his legs buckle and tumble to the mat in pain!)

Jimmy: What a fighter!!!

(While Knight is down, Copeland uses his sheer will to grab an arm and lock it up with his arms. Knight struggles but the pressure is slowly intensifying. Knight manages to get to his feet and stomps down on Copeland's head.)

(Chris Copeland lies on the mat feeling the oozy pain of having no legs! Knight stands again and twists the legs of Chris Copeland in a sharpshooter!)

Jimmy: This is the same maneuver used to beat Cliff Knight in Boston!

(Copeland fights for a few seconds, but what’s the point? Copeland is out. Copeland taps the ground and the match is awarded to Cliff Knight.)

[Cliff Knight beats Chris Copeland via Sharpshooter]

(Knight lifts his hands high up in the air in victory while Copeland lies on the ground feeling the agony and pain of defeat. He’s grabbing his right leg this time, feeling the cold sensation of brokenness)

(Pondababa enters the ring. Cliff Knight is in the middle, the ref is on the right side, Pondababa on the left side; they all raise their hands together over top of Chris Copeland. Copeland has his eyes shut on his side.)

Pondababa: End Chris Copeland, tonight… Knight, finish him.

(Chris Copeland stares his big blue eyes into the eyes of Cliff Knight. A billion thoughts are flowing in their heads. Pondababa is behind Cliff Knight encouraging the violence!)

Pondababa: Break both those legs, Knight. Break em both!

(The pure pressure of Pondababa is getting a bit on Cliff Knight’s nerves. Cliff Knight looks down at Copeland and brings him to his feet. Copeland starts hopping on his right one- the less injured of the two. Pondababa spins Cliff Knight at the shoulder around demanding him to finish Chris Copeland off.)

Pondababa: Kill em!

Rudolph: Pondababa has gone too far! He’s infected with a pleasure for too much violence!

(Cliff Knight spins around and surprisingly smokes Pondababa clear in the face with Chris Copeland’s superkick!!! The mechanical feet of Pondababa fly high in the air like a kite from the impact of Cliff Knight’s superkick.)

Cliff Knight: I am by myself in the Ultimate Survivor!

(Copeland smiles for a short second and continues rubbing his left knee. Cliff Knight turns around and stares into the eyes of Chris Copeland. Pondababa rolls out of the ring. Cliff Knight holds up the hand of Chris Copeland! The fans roar!!! The fans loudly cheer for the mutual respect that Cliff Knight is showing for Chris Copeland!)

Rudolph: Chris Copeland is a fighter until the very end!

Jimmy: The bad thing is yet to come; Chris Copeland has to fight in THE next match. Can he even compete?

Jimmy: Well, Copeland has to thank his lucky charms that Hardcore Hooligan went all out on Evan Drexxler.
Rudolph: Both of these guys are coming into this match already tired. Copeland is coming into this injured.
Jimmy: It might come down to; who has the most heart?

[Backstage: A doctor visits Chris Copeland]

(Chris Copeland is jamming a needle into his leg, trying to ease off the pain.)

Chris Copeland: Come on in, unless you are Evan Drexxler.

(A doctor appears at the door with a stethoscope, a mini hammer and a toolkit)

Doctor: How are you doing today?
Copeland: How do you think? I can hardly even feel my legs.
Doctor: Ok, let me try this. This will test your reaction speed.

(The doctor hits Copeland with a miniature hammer. Copeland doesn’t react at all to the test)

Doctor: Odd, indeed. How’s your heartbeat?

(Kingsly enters the room with Copeland heart being checked.)

Doctor: Your heart is racing at a million beats per second, Chris.

(The doctor notices a whole load of pain killers that Copeland has been taking and then he calls President Kingsly out of the room. Kingsly and the doctor whisper a few things without Copeland hearing. The doctor leaves the premises and Kingsly re-enters the room)

Kingsly: Chris, we have some bad news for you.
Copeland: What is it?
Kingsly: You cannot compete in your upcoming match against Evan Drexxler. You must go to a hospital, now! All Drexxler has to do is go to the ring, and he’s already advanced to the next round.

(Copeland sighs and drops his head. For all his efforts, has gone to waste.)

[Backstage with Ixon]

Father of Church: There he is! Follow me brothers, there is the inner daemon child, Evan Drexxler!

(A mob of about 15 churchmen start charging at Ixon. Ixon, almost tripping on his cloak, runs away from the crowd and enters the sold out Palace of Auburn Hills.)

[Back in the arena]

(The whole arena dims as the crowd grows deathly silent, waiting in an ill-fated anticipation for what is inevitably to come. The lights then slowly come on and then dim down again. Suddenly a wolf's howl echoes through the arena piercing desolation into the hearts of those around. The methodic guitars of "Second Death" by Living Sacrifice then chime in.)

Jimmy: All that he has to do is go down to the ring… And he’s already won it!

(The voice continues on alone saying "Presently waiting, Second Death." trailing off in an ominous echo. When the echo stops the lights flash on with a bang. As the lights come on and eyes begin to come back into focus there is a man crouched in the ring cloaked all in gray. The smoke flees from him as he stands and removes his hood to reveal the man known only as Ixon.)

Jimmy: Michigan hates Ixon!
Rudolph: I think it’s because they love Copeland so much, Jimmy!

(Suddenly, “Bullets” by Creed blares in the Palace of Auburn Hills as Kingsly arrows to the ring. He rolls into the ring with a mic in hand)

Kingsly: Stop the music. This is an unfortunate day here in the Ultimate Survivor. Tonight, the people do not get what they want to see. Do you know why? We can say thanks to Pondababa for injuring Chris Copeland earlier tonight and in Boston and for this match being awarded to none other than, Evan Drexxler.

(Suddenly, "Ænema" by Tool rips through the arena and the fans inside the Palace explode in mad fits of celebration)

Jimmy: He just keeps on coming, and coming, and coming. He’s like Jason Voorhees!
Rudolph: Simply amazing!
Jimmy: This is incredible!!! Have you ever heard a crowd so loud???
Rudolph: What? I can't hear you!
Jimmy: I said… Ah…

(The standing ovation is sustained as Chris Copeland limps down the aisle savoring every moment of the greeting. Gingerly protecting his left knee which is heavily taped over his orange wrestling tights, Cope rolls into the ring with an anxious Ixon. President Kingsly rolls out of the ring as the chaos begins! Ixon comes in with a monstrous clothesline connecting with the throat of Chris Copeland)

Jimmy: Ooh!

(The fans ooh and aw as Copeland is hoisted high up in the air with a gorilla press. Copeland is thrown onto the mat as Ixon charges off the ropes. Ixon attempts a swift clothesline to the sternum but Copeland escapes as the fans roar for more! Copeland stands tall as Ixon swings his right arm! Copeland ducks and starts cutting off the oxygen with a blatant sleeper hold!)

Jimmy: Come on, Cope!

(Ixon starts waving his arms like a windmill, and he merges backwards into the turnbuckle. Copeland’s back deflates in the turnbuckle as Ixon shakes the cobwebs out of his skull.)

Rudolph: You can do it, Copeland! God is behind you 100 per cent.

(Copeland again jumps onto the back of Ixon and places him into a sleeper hold. Ixon does a forward flip with Copeland on his back. Copeland squeals but continues to fight. Ixon grabs a head full of hair and launches Copeland into the ropes. Copeland’s legs do not buckle, Ixon drops his head and Copeland performs a sunset flip.)

1…2 (Ixon kicks out!)

(With the fans behind him, Copeland and Ixon scurry to their feet. Ixon kicks with his right leg, Copeland swings with his left arm, and both competitors fall to the mat.)

(Copeland yelps, grabbing his leg and Ixon finally discovers the injured leg. Ixon points at the leg and the crowd boo. Chris Copeland struggles up off the ground, and Ixon sweeps the legs of Chris Copeland. Copeland starts toppling over like the Leaning Tower of Pisa as Ixon charges off the ropes like a wild boar. Ixon does a face first spear shattering the right leg of Chris Copeland! Copeland falls onto the mat and Ixon stares up to the sky. Chris Copeland is directly below him, and Ixon does a downward Hurricane Punch to the right leg of Chris Copeland! Ixon pins the man!

1…2..3/4 (Chris Copeland miraculously kicks out!)

Jimmy: Without legs, how can you win the match, Rudy?
Rudolph: An act of God!

(The 15 churchmen on the hunt for Ixon, start walking to the ring and surround the ring. President Pondababa emerges from the curtains as well.)

Jimmy: Come on, Rudy! You call your men off!!! This is an immunity main event. People’s lives are at stake here. You call your men off. No interfering!

(Rudolph gets off his chair and puts his stop sign of a hand out)

(In the ring, Ixon has Chris Copeland legs laced between his right arm as he performs a pump handle power bomb! Chris Copeland bounces on the canvas, as Ixon hooks the leg for a pin.)

1…2…3/4 (Chris Copeland kicks out!)

(Ixon climbs the top rope and puts out his hands in the form of a cross. Ixon attempts a face-first head butt to the injured Chris Copeland. In the nick of time, Copeland rolls out of harms way and Ixon stubs his head on the ground. Copeland cannot walk. Copeland cannot stand. So he drags himself to the nearest ropes and uses them as leverage for him to climb to his feet. On his right leg, he signals for the superkick by tapping his left softly on the mat! Ixon, without seeing a thing, walks right into Chris Copeland. Ixon instinctively ducks the superkick of Chris Copeland and places his hand on the right thigh of Copeland. He lifts up Copeland by the thigh and swings 90 degrees performing a devastating thigh powerbomb heard around the entire state of Michigan! Ixon looks down at Copeland and performs a downward arcing Hurricane Heart Punch stopping a single beat of the heart of Chris Copeland. Ixon pins Copeland!)

1…2…3 (Ixon defeats Copeland with a downward Hurricane Heart Punch!)

(The fans drop their heads in shame… Their hero has been beaten on his own turf… Pondababa enters the ring with a mic in his hand.)

Jimmy: OH MY! Chris Copeland does not make it to the final three!
Rudolph: Look at the fans! They are destroyed!
Jimmy: It’s like Ixon ripped out each individual fans heart!

(The angry religious mob of fifteen stare at the “inner daemons” of Ixon. Ixon looks in their direction, and runs off the ropes. He charges through the middle and top ropes catching 8 of the 15! Ixon somersaults down the aisle way and runs away from the outnumbered crowd. Ixon continues running to the curtains)

[Backstage: Cliff Knight waiting backstage, right by the curtains of the entrance. He looks at the camera and gives a thumbs up.]

[Backstage: Hardcore Hooligan is standing around a wall, watching Mister Knight; Johnny Damage is patting the Skulled Cane of Uluz. He looks into the camera and gives a thumbs up.]

(Ixon is looking back at the angry mob as he pushes the curtains. Ixon yells a little something into the camera when he walks by)

Ixon: My eyebrows are singed off!

(Cliff Knight swings a bear-like clothesline hitting Ixon right off his feet! Ixon falls on the ground after a hard-fought match. Cliff Knight stands over top of Ixon like he’s the king of the World. CRACK!!! He didn’t see it coming. The skulled cane that Johnny Damage received from Uluz connected into the cranium of Cliff Knight. Knight falls on the ground and Johnny Damage unleashes repeated fists filled of anger into the pretty-boy face of Cliff Knight.)

Jimmy: OH MY! Knight thought he could sneak attack Ixon. But he was the one sneak attacked.

(The religious angry mob of 15 enters the back room as the scene cuts to President Pondababa and Chris Copeland in the ring)

[Back to the ring: President Pondababa meets Chris Copeland]

President Pondababa: It’s remarkable how things can change within seconds, isn’t it?

(Chris Copeland, the soldier to the very end, stands on his feet with the help of holding onto ropes)

President Pondababa: In Boston, it only took a matter of seconds for you to turn into what you are now. But in Boston, that’s the only thing that people can remember. What I remembered most about Boston was your defeat over Knight and Damage. In a matter of seconds, I am going to give you the choice… I am going to give you a choice that can change the entire outcome of the Ultimate Survivor. You have the option of replacing Cliff Knight or Johnny Damage because you beat them both in a Triple Threat match. What do you say? In a matter of seconds, Copeland, you can change the Ultimate Survivor.

(Pondababa walks forward and puts out the microphone. Copeland, battered and bruised, snatches the mic away with definite signs of fatigue)

Chris Copeland: I lost fair and square. I bid you fair well, Pondababa. I bid you fair well, ahhh (rubs his knee) Michigan. I bid you fair well, Ultimate Survivor. To answer your question: (rubs his other knee and makes himself stand a bit taller than Pondababa) NOOOO!

(Copeland drops the microphone in front of a surprised President Pondababa. The fans cheer the honourable fighter Chris Copeland as he slowly walks away from a roaring home state Michigan crowd in Detroit.)

Jimmy: Chris Copeland denies President Pondababa from re-entering the Ultimate Survivor replacing Knight or Damage!
Rudolph: Knight, Damage, Drexxler in the finals of Las Vegas!
Jimmy: Goognight folks! Goog-night to you yal!!!

(Chris Copeland stalls at the ramp way and elevates his arms high in the air. The fans release one last burst of cheers. He waves goodbye to the sold out crowd in the Palace of Auburn Hills.)

[The scene fades in and out with a picture of Chris Copeland] We bid farewell to the best face in the Ultimate Survivor - Chris Copeland